₦airaland Forum

Missnande:
Smiles really funny. The formerly ugly or clumsy ones who turn out to be the hottest at the reunion.

safarigirl:
Today, I want to talk about reunions, specifically secondary school reunions which mostly occur at the end of the year. It is usually a gathering of monitoring spirits veiled as old friends and schoolmates.

Secondary school reunions are one of the most depressing things to go for, like except you graduated from Harvard and are planning a wedding to Otedola's son or something, you can barely impress anybody.

One of the most popular questions no one can escape at such gatherings is the "so, what are you doing these days?"

The first thing you need to realise about 97% of people who ask this question is that they couldn't care less what you're doing, they just want to do a comparison and see if your life is shittier than theirs.

So, let's check out the various categories of people at the average SSR


The In-Your-Face Gang:

These are the ones that never liked you in secondary school, but are suddenly opening teeth for you and acting like they actually send you, when the only reason they're doing that is because they assume they are doing better than you anyway.

#TeamHappilyMarried:

AKA "my husband and kids" crew....five minutes will not pass without these people mentioning their husband or kids... Everyone could be discussing one oppressive teacher and the next thing they're like "oh, my husband and I absolutely love the Ice Cream at Coldstone" like ...who asked you?


The Never-Give-Up Boos

Aside the pretentious people, there are also the persistent ones, like the guy in your school who doesn't realize that if you didn't like him seven years ago, you still won't like him now. As soon as he walks in, your first thought is "Hai God! This boy came?" And you have to spend the entire time avoiding him.

The Everlasting Bad Guys[\b]

Oh and let's not forget, the ones that are averse to change. They are still the rowdy, noisemaking drunks who may or may not be involved in illegal dealings. Remember the guys who transferred chokes and were the ringleaders of those midnight conference calls for latest examination leaks? They have now graduated to wire-wire


[b]The Heart-break Crush

So, remember the guy you were crushing on that year? The one you went out of your way to look pretty for hoping he would finally ask you out? He's made it for the reunion....with his pregnant wife oh the pain! The saddest thing is that he's so happy....and you're not

The What Went Wrong Crew:

Aka WWW...these are the people everyone had high hopes for. Like, you were sure these people would 'blow' as soon as y'all graduated. They'd immediately get University admission, graduate top of their class and just boss everything.....well, life is not that simple....and the class clown has blown, but the genius is still trying to get his footing in society. Or is it the couple that should have gotten married at some point after University because their love was truer than Jack and Rose, but now, they can't even stand each other.

The Glow-Up Gang (Missnande)

AKA I never hesperredit. These ones were the rejects back then, dem no fine, dem no sabi dress, dem no know book, dem no dey play sport, dem just dey. The ones you were already pitying their offsprings in advance, only for them to show up looking better than everybody else. The large pimples are gone, the skin tone is now even, and they now have foreign 'hag-cent'....which baba do the jazz?

The Shy Gang:

They were NEVER present....or at least that's what it seeemed like. These ones will not participate in anything, they won't make conversation with anyone, they just sit in a corner and observe.


#SelfieGang

These ones are a creation of android phones. They are usually the girls who were popular back then and still have it going well, because they are armed with their IPhones or Samsung Galaxy, they will take more pictures than the official photographer at the event. At every point, they will be looking for the right angles to snap and will be photo bombing other people's pics

[img]


The Ones Who Don't Go At All:

As in, I cannuh comman kee myself, you no hold better money, you no get better cloth, why go and see people whose names you can barely remember? These ones will never go for reunions, but they will scroll through Facebook for pictures after the party...."...because I just want to see if Amaka still fine like before"


That's my list....feel free to add to it if you wish. Where do you belong?

Abiodunspectre:
The Phantom 8 can now roam worldwide

ychris:
Still don't understand?
I need more light plsssssss

chimchim1:
Buy lyca mobile and stop been ignorant

sleekman:
Apparently, no one has answered you appropriately. The US, Canada and their protectorates use CDMA code division multiple access technology which operate on different frequencies from that of Nigeria and Europe which are GSM global system for mobiles. Very few networks use GSM in the US and Canada. E.g AT&T in d US and Roger in Canada.

Bossman:
OP, as others mentioned, your phone likely does not have the frequencies used here. Which are 850/1900 for 2G/3G. Tmobile also has some 1700/2100 AWS Frequency. For LTE the primary bands here are 2/4/5/12/17. Even the cheap sub $50 phones sold here will have all these 2G/3G/4G bands used here. And at a minimum, they will have the 2G/3G bands used outside the US.

I see a lot of incorrect info given here:
- There is no phone sold in the US in the last 12 years or so that will not work in Nigeria. Since all phones sold since then have always had the 850/900/1800/1900 GSM bands.
- both MTN and GLO (I have had both since their inception and they've always worked here) allow roaming anywhere in the US. So with the right frequency, it should work in any US city. Roaming is not by city as someone incorrectly posted.

westjoy:
You can't use chinco phone is USA like infinix and Techno phone .

Sebastine1994:
few days ago some boys went to his home and butchered him with a knife. although he is still alive but he fingered me for it. as a former cultist myself, I use my influence to protect him. he wasn't under my umbrella anymore and became venerable.

he was stabbed when he came out to see why the generator

Desyner:
If you are innocent go see a strong Man of God and let him pray for you then turn yourself in.

We now know you are the wanted guy in a sch where a lecturer was stabbed. It is a matter of time befnre you colleagues who are on NL decode your Identity.

AntiIPOB:
See an old woman that is always the first to accused someone of having multiple account,after been banned,she rush to another one,thank your god,despite the fact that you failed maritally, Internet has become your husband, continues while your mate enjoy their husband.

Before I go,I want to tell you this once more,I have no hand in your failed marriages, it is your manners and lack of respect for men that put you in this miserly, therefore take care of your problem I will take care of mine.






If I answer you again,may tinder strike me.

mctowel01:
dry joke

kahal29:
You need to take a course in reserve mgt and the uses of external reserve to answer your questions.

zakim:
sai baba...APC is working!

kahal29:
And still they say Buhari is not working...

Chicagoesontop:
I Pray say Darlington my guy go dey there, Darlington wey leave 9ija since 2005 enter Libya nobody has heard from him or know his where about till now.

May he(Darlington) be the first to come down from that plane ... AMEN !!

jumpandpas:
… Counts real cost of a fratricidal Boko Haram war

By Soni Daniel with UN report

Eight years after Boko Haram launched a senseless war that has claimed over 20,000 lives and displaced over 1.8 million people now scattered in IDP camps across North Eastern Nigeria, the real cost of the fratricidal war now beckons: 8.5 million people are in urgent need of life-saving assistance, 5.2 million are in dire need of food security interventions and 3.4 in urgent need of nutrition assistance. But the fund for all of this is not readily available, putting the fate of the victims in the balance and their future in uncertainty.


Halima, three, is sitting on the bare floor close to her 21-year-old mother, Sadiatu, and they are actively muttering some words to each other. The time is about 2pm on a Tuesday and they have not yet had their breakfast due to the fact that there is no food in their new abode and the money to do so, is not available.
Boko Haram

Their abode, known as Bakassi IDP Camp, in Maiduguri the Borno State Capital, is holding them and thousands of other persons violently displaced from their ancestral homes and communities in many parts of the state and thrown into despondency, fear and distress by the Boko Haram terrorists, who have since 2009 been killing, maiming and kidnapping people in pursuit of an agenda: the declaration of a Caliphate where western education would be outlawed.


As a reporter gets close to Sadiatu and her daughter to figure out the reason for their pensive mood, the mother offered a clue: “We don’t have anything in this house and we don’t know where our next meal will come from,” Sadiatu lamented.
As she narrates her jeremiad to a team of reporters, other occupants of the make-shift camp- a housing estate planned by the Borno State Government but hurriedly converted to a holding camp for the displaced victims, many other IPDs gather around to describe their pitiable situations.


Adamu Shehu, 12, an orphan, is moving from one hut in the camp to the other in search of any form of provision, having lost her two parents to the Boko Haram terrorists when they struck Gwoza over three years ago. Beyond the violent killing of his parents, Adamu said their home was razed by the insurgents and other members of the family killed, wounded or taken away to unknown destination.

Sadiatu, Halima and Adamu are just a few of the thousands of IDPs squatting at the Bakassi Camp provided by the Borno State Government and receiving material and logistical support from the United Nations Office for the Coordination of Humanitarian Affairs, UNOCHA. No fewer than five of such camps have been provided by the Borno State Government to provide temporary accommodation for the IDPs and protect them from further exploitation by their tormentors.
The three are among the 1.8 million victims of the Boko Haram insurgency, which has claimed no fewer than 20,000 lives and destroyed many hitherto flourishing communities and displaced their inhabitants across the six north east states of Nigeria, sparking one of the world’s worst refugee scenarios.


According to OCHA, the humanitarian crisis in Nigeria’s Northeast and the Lake Chad region is one of the most severe in the world today with 8.5 million in need of humanitarian assistance in 2017 in the worst affected states of Borno, Adamawa and Yobe with the war now in its eighth year, showing no signs of abating.
Beyond the 8.5 people in need of humanitarian assistance, no fewer than 1.7 million according to OCHA, are internally displaced in the three states, with 80 percent of them in Borno State alone, the epic centre of the crisis and over half of them living outside IDP camps in local communities, who are themselves said to be among the world’s poorest people.

Aside that, 6.1 million people in the area are in need of protection while no fewer than 4000 women and girls are reported to have been abducted since 2009 by the insurgents.
UNOCHA in its latest update on the crisis entitled, Northeast: Humanitarian Review, noted, “Civilians continue to bear the brunt of a conflict that has resulted in widespread forced displacement, violations of international humanitarian and human laws, severe protection concerns and a food and nutrition crisis of massive proportions.


“Insecurity, especially in swathes of Borno State, continues to hamper humanitarian operations. However, through coordinated logistics and civil-military coordination efforts, humanitarian teams can now access some areas that were previously inaccessible. This has revealed new depth of devastation and humanitarian need,” OCHA said.
The atrocities of Boko Haram is that in most cases whole communities have been destroyed, farmlands set ablaze and the inhabitants killed or kidnapped while women have been serially raped and turned into sex machines and suicide bombers.
The situation is dire! Food is no longer coming from the farms of those communities destroyed by the insurgents while those left behind, if any, are too scared to go their farms for any kind of cultivation. This has brought about a serious threat to food security and opened the potential for starvation and malnutrition across the northeast.


The lingering threats and attacks by the insurgents have also blocked accessibility in some of the states in the northeast to humanitarian assistance providers. According to reports, the prolonged humanitarian crisis has already had a devastating impact on food security and nutrition in the North-eastern part of Nigeria with 5.2 million people currently in need of food assistance in the three most affected states and 450,000 children under five in need of nutrition support.
OCHA, whose officials are already working in the worst affected areas, says that the food situation remains precarious. It notes: “Rapid food assessments were recently carried out in eastern Borno and high food deficits and high food prices remain pronounced across the three areas surveyed in Banki, Gwoza and Pulka.
“In addition, access to vulnerable populations has been limited since July due to insecurity and the rainy season, resulting in convoy delays and an inability to reach some locations,” the agency reported.


The humanitarian situation in the Northeast has become pronounced and caught the attention of the United Nations Secretary General, who recently raised the alarm that at least 20 million people in Nigeria’s Northeast, Somalia, Yemen and South Sudan are facing devastating levels of food security and asked for urgent intervention to avert the disaster.

For instance, in August 2017, the United Nations said that due to insecurity and other access constraints, over 337,000 beneficiaries could not be reached in Borno’s Ngala, Gwoza, Dikwa and Monguno. Insecurity, it was gathered, has also hampered crop assessments and delivery of agricultural inputs in areas like Mobbar, Abadam and Marte local government areas of the state.
The absence of basic facilities for the IDPs and their continued displacement from their comfort zones resulted in cholera outbreak last August. As at August 31, 2017, there were 125 suspected cases of cholera in Maiduguri, Dikwa and Mongono and eight suspected cholera-related deaths.

But apparently in a move to properly organise humanitarian assistance in Nigeria and give succour to the IDPS in the northeast, UNOCHA has scaled up its operations in Nigeria with the launching of Nigerian Humanitarian Fund, NHF, a country-based pooled fund managed by the UNOCHA in support of life-saving humanitarian and recovery operations.
As a result of the launch of the fund, over 90 humanitarian organisations have aided about 4.5 million of the IDPs with nutrition, food, shelter, health, education, protection, water and sanitation support.
UNOCHA has also strengthened its humanitarian leadership in Nigeria with the appointments of new Resident and Humanitarian Coordinator, Edward Kallon, a veteran in humanitarian work, for Nigeria in addition to the naming of a Deputy Humanitarian Coordinator, Peter Lundberg, to take charge of the epic centre of the Boko Haram insurgency in Maiduguri.


Borno State Governor, Kashim Shettima, whose state has borne the main brunt of the Boko Haram violence, is certain all the efforts being geared towards solving the problem triggered by the malevolent elements, will produce positive results for the people.
Shettima, who describes himself as an incurable optimist, believes the state will never and can never surrender to the terrorists.
“We will certainly defeat the terrorists and create a conducive atmosphere for the displaced people to return to their communities to re-start their lives,” the governor vowed.
With a war that started as a child’s play, now in its eighth year, taking a toll on the very people who once lived, married and interacted as brothers and sisters, now turning into pogrom, kidnapping and displacement of thousands of households and the animosity generated by it further widening the gulf between the terrorists and the rest of the people and the end not of the onslaught not yet in sight, there is urgent need to strategise on how to put an end to the crisis and save the people.



https://www.vanguardngr.com/2017/11/20m-now-face-devastation-un-ranks-nigeria-somalia-yemen-south-sudan/

cefezyA:
It probably your friend is even using voice over internet to communicate you like whistle phone sure it must be voi can't be a standard sim line whistle phone does that wella Skype does it too TextNow might do same so they prefer to using those app so they might only need to connect to WiFi to make call and stay long that reason why you can't dial same number back in Nigeria format and get them instead you will be speaking with some here in Nigeria that the owner the number keep changing when ever they called