a stone's throw from heaven

there was no reason to awake
the morning was dark and cold
the sun was reluctant to rise
my heart was afraid to beat, afraid to hear a call
the call that got me waiting and might never come
i did not breathe, i did not cry, i was wise
still i receive no embrace, not even from sheol

my God, my God. we love each other, my God and i.
He is everywhere but not here when i need the embrace of a man
He cannot kiss me, He cannot love me the way a man could
my God, He created every good thing and he created an ache within me, an ache only this man can fill

i miss him, this man, so much; i wish i never knew him.
it has been five years and some have waited longer
i longed to be with him
but this day the walls of the bedroom echoed, "you are a stone's throw from heaven".
though the words did not lie, it understated the nearness of heaven.
heaven had come in my life time, here and now.
heaven's breath i felt whisper over my shoulder.
heaven called my name playfully "Sisi mi"
heaven pulled me closer to himself as we lay carelessly in bed.
heaven had come for me.

what is heaven and who is heaven?
this cold, dark morning, i dreamed a good dream
this dream did not run from me even when i awakened.
heaven remained.
when he laid his hand on my left breast, my heart could feel his touch.
heaven in my lifetime
he held me so close he seeped into my soul
the cherubs applauded our union
heaven in my lifetime
i had cursed myself, thinking he would never be back.
he is back
heaven in my lifetime


culled from
orita meta
the crossroads
"Cecilia"
by
peju alatise

this aint my poem, so it in a book and i loved it so
nilla, since you the judge here, poetry, is it just writing what you feel, anything?