₦airaland Forum

anointedlinks:
Here are a few;
Don't bite your fingernails (there is dirt in between them), get a pedicure and manicure instead (can do this by yourself as well)

Wash your hair regularly so it doesn't smell

Bath at least once a day

Floss in between your teeth to remove large food particles of meat etc (very important to prevent tooth decay and bad breath)

Brush your teeth and tongue with toothbrush and tongue scraper (preferably twice daily)

Gargle your mouth with salt water before bed. You will be shocked to wake up with zero morning breath (even if you didn't brush before sleeping).

Rinse your mouth with water after meals (can floss too)

Visit a dentist annually as some oral issues can only be corrected there

Keep your living space tidy

Use water to wash your rectal area after using the toilet (use a bidet or bottle), it is a much more hygienic method than the use of tissue paper and leaves that area odorless

Use water to rinse your urinal tract after urinating or use a kleenex if in a public restroom where water is not accessible. This ensures your underwear does not get soiled and smelly from mild incontinence

Apply lotion on your skin daily to keep it from looking dry and white

Get a nose hair trimmer

Eat less oily and junk foods and more natural whole foods to reduce propensity for acne breakouts

Exercise regularly (at the very minimum walk more often) to stay fit and healthy

Go for regular general health checkups

Let go of bitterness of all forms to stay disease free (forgive even though you don't forget the offense, learn from it)

Smile more often, be kind and practice boundary setting to avoid burnout

Shave regularly where necessary (more for men)

Use a deodorant to prevent body odor

Be mindful of your posture and get help to correct it where necessary

Learn correct clothing colour combination and dress smartly with freshly ironed clothes

Get comfortable shoes to prevent foot injury and pain which cause bad moods

Invest in knowledge to make you a well rounded and financially stable person

Avoid debt except for business purposes and pray before taking such

Get counselling and therapy where necessary to clear emotional baggage issues

Connect spiritually with your creator


What tips do you have that were not mentioned? Comment below

Bonab:
Dear Single mum,

How are you coping with raising a kid(s) alone? I know your pain and I know how you feel when people make a smirk remark about you.

To the society you have committed an unpardonable sin,and these people think that the punishment for this offense is to never be married to any man, because they they say you're a 'second hand product'.

To make matters worse,some kids refers to your child as a bastard,hence that child keeps asking you where's Daddy.

I know that if you have the power, maybe you could have done things differently this time. But remember that every human being on earth deserves a second chance.

What the society do not understand is that being a single mum could be due to different factors.

1) Death of a spouse: when one of the significant orders becomes deceased leaving you behind to take care of the kids alone. I know that in some cases people think you killed him.

2) Divorce/separation: sometimes marriage becomes toxic and a battle field threatening the life of the woman,even though it is hard to leave but to save herself,she seeks for divorce.

3)Rape & sexual abuse: sometimes even when you make the decision to avoid sex till marriage, fate strikes thrusting upon you a responsibility you are not prepared for. E.g some of you were drugged and raped,while some were raped at a gun point by brutal men.

4) Personal decisions: Some of you intentionally decided to have a baby out of wedlock because you feel time is running out and you are not getting younger and this marriage thing is taking time to happen.

5) Youthful exuberance/Naivety: He told you that the only way to prove you love him was to have sex with him,well what you don't know was that though he wanted to satisfy himself,yet he was not ready to shoulder responsibility because he was a teenager just like you who still depended on his parents. You were so naive and inexperienced and that was why he cashed in on that.

What about that uncle that always lures you in with money because he knows you are in a difficult place financially and now that it has happened,he has disappeared.

But for whatever reason it happened you should know that it is not the end of your life. If you're in this position and still wish to marry or remarry as the case maybe,the following things are what I want to tell you.

(1) Don't allow what people say(online/offline) to get to you: when you allow what they say get to you,you will begin to see yourself the way they present you. You would begin to think that nobody wants you. You would begin to go for lesser options.infact you would think that whoever proposes to marry you is only pitying you, hence you would accept just anybody.

I can hear people recommending old men to you or widowers, because they feel you're a second hand product.

Avoid reading, listening or watching things that degrades you and makes you feel worthless. Always affirm to yourself that you are not your mistake.

2) Add value to yourself: believe me there are still men who considers the value you are bringing to the table more than any other thing. Add value to yourself. Go back to school if you have to. Learn a profitable skill that can help you earn and to be able to take care of your kid without turning yourself into to a beggar. Men maybe attracted to you because of your body,but they would stay because of how valuable you are to them.

3) Don't Join miserably Company of friends: Because it was the guy's fault doesn't mean you should spend your whole life talking about him. Avoid platforms that are devoted to bashing men and insulting them everyday. It would only make you feel bitter and resentful towards the male folk. This could drive you into depression or give you a false sense of happiness which does not last. Make friends with normal people who are positive and are ready to take responsibility for their actions. Any solace you get embracing the wrong people will soon fizzle out .

4) Network and Mingle: let's face it,the people who are mocking you are not really better than you. Some of them have had many abortions or have paid for someone to have an abortion. Don't let it affect you. Mingle and network. You are not as old as they say. One thing with God is that he gives a second chance even though people thinks you don't deserve another chance,but what about them.

5) Don't believe their lies: people once told me that there are no jobs out there. I heard it repeatedly and so I endured in one miserable job. One day I decided to try, and that decision changed my life for good. What I am saying is that you should not believe them that nobody wants you. There are reasonable people out there,who will give up anything to be with a good woman.

6) Don't transfer aggression to your child: I know some of you are already transferring aggression to this innocent child. This is a wrong approach,the child deserves to be loved and not hated. Children are a blessing from God, no matter how they came to this earth. Learn to control your emotions around your child.

7) Learn to balance your affection: The child is your responsibility and not the man's responsibility, except if there's an agreement for him to do so depending on his capacity.

Stop billing the man all the time because you needed money for your child,in fact he's dating you and not your child. Don't feel he must carry all your burden when he's not God.

Also, learn to love the man and not make him feel used by you. Some of you talk about your child non stop, leaving the man wondering if you have any love for them at all or if you're just using them. Learn to balance the affection. You can love your child and still love him.

Never lower your values: You can make adjustments for each other when necessary,but never change your values because you are desperate to marry. In the end you will regret it.

9)Love yourself: love yourself enough to forgive yourself if you think it was your fault. Love yourself enough to quit listening to people who's opinion should not matter in your life. Forgive the other party if you're still sad about him and focus on the good side of life.

Just like we have witnessed many marriages of single mothers,we shall be here to rejoice with you when yours happen. Congratulations in advance.

essentialone:
Apart from sleeping with men, what else can a lady do to own Billions?

Sapasenator:
Actually very cheap if on a good location in the Island.

Ilamina:
Sucks I was born cursed

No money, no confidence. .not strong enough

finallybusy:

Sheistoopretty:
Poor man and wanting respect 5 and 6

odenkirk:
i dont know weather its hiv or hunger but something is difinitely wrong with me. this cant be a body of a normal 30year old man. God punish Nigerian leaders.
the sun has tanned me due to excessive working under the sun and i still have nothing.
i think this is the reason wherever i go asking for work they say No to me. who will employ this sick looking bst.