₦airaland Forum

lakesidepapa:
Good morning HARDDON BABA, Pls how do i get across to you? do you run special courses or have an ebook, stuffs like that?

My heart bleeds everytime I think about this; the fact that I had to put all my one-on-one, 20-to-1, realtime sessions on hold though I haven't reached my set target number of guys yet.
Moments I not only impacted nutty knowledge but learned also from guys from all works of life!

As much as I try to, my table keeps getting full by the day and I can't organise special sessions again.

Hopefully, this thread and my blog, that has been crying for fresh juice even with all the funds we've been paying to keep it alive, can suffice for now.

I am cooking something though....

Gabe427:
then I bumped into this thread since around 2020...it didnt strike me then till I'm seeing it almost7 years apart and the man HARDDON is still replying

I made a promise at the very beginning....

and a man's word should be his bond.

Amuroba:
The face looks like Harddon's

The tattoo artist is a pure pervert though.
Just look at how he is using style to spank n make it wave


Ok, I was not here.

Jewelprince41:
so how do I learn it na

You are sitting on a great starting point resource; this thread.

posty56:
the decay will continue,and sadly there's no stopping,things like this are signs of the end point/ endgame/end time.tge world needs to be reborn.

This sent chills down my spine.

Is there some force/foretellings striving for a revelation?

Could this be some kind of fulfilment of what is written? 'because iniquity shall abound...?'

Jewelprince41:
but ma no lie approach part dey give me wahala ooo
from working d courage to approach to knowing d right thing to say ( openers) na wahala make ona help me
give me practical ways from on seeing d girl to d opener stuff

Just as with everything you are good at now, you must learn.

the only innate things we were born with are; sucking of breasts as tender babes and getting attracted to the opposite gender. We learned ever other thing.

Adasun:
This is amazing....

Where has this funny bone being?

Timibraun0010:
Thanks HARDDON,
My lack of situational awareness and inability to make up my mind from day one is the root of this. So I ended up floating throughout the entire duration .

To her, it was more than just we talking. She's fully aware and at each point she interprets my actions and guage it while on the other end, I was just having a discussion. At least, that's what I deduced now that everything has crashed.

I guess she caught feelings along the line cos I remembered just one Saturday I went for a friend's wedding with another female friend. As early as 7:30pm she was already asking if I'm going home with the couple. The next thing, was an 11 eleven missed calls and 6 on WhatsApp ,messages as well throughout that night till day break.

I have taken my L and moved on. I should be fully aware now that no talk is just a talk with a girl. They process it

This is a pseudo light you just found.
It burns very bright at the beginning but fade very quickly too.

Take your time, read the thread. and make this a way of life with soft bones and generally.

Timibraun0010:
Please I need an advise on what to do. Have I lost her? Can I still get her ? .

We met online sometimes in October last year but started talking fully by Nov. By that time I had no intention whatsoever towards her. By Dec we've started talking everyday. She told me about her ex, the breakup and how she is scared of going through what she experienced again.

By Jan, she came to see me from in Osun from Lag and spent 4 days. I made a move on her but she resisted that she doesn't want any form of friend with benefit. All through ,there were smushes and for the duration of her stay, we slept cuddled up on the couch.
Finally she left back for her base in Kaduna. A week later, I discovered I actually want her but then I noticed she's kinda withdrawing.

2 days ago, she called that we have to talk. Before now, my emotions are already brewing . Making me to start thinking of her abnormally . While talking, she ask what was the impression I gave my friends about her. Cos she spoke with my friend and that one was whining her that we are bringing yams soon.
At the end, she said I should have cautioned him since we are not dating and when we met, she stated she wasn't looking for a relationship.

On my part, in a bid to flush out the emotion in me and probably forget about her, I asked her out knowing fully well what her answer will be.

Ofcourse she reminded me she isn't looking for a relationship and that even though we talk everyday, and she spent days with me doesn't mean anything. That we should just leave it at friendship but then, nothing is impossible.

Lemmie add that before she came, there jwas the plan of me going to spend time her at her base during my offwork month.
The truth is I actually want her now but I feel I have messed up greatly by not deciding what I want from day one, asking her out at that moment. Not securing her mind first by breaking her walls and fears.

How can I navigate through this and win her back. I know there are other girls but this is the only girl I've truly been happy with her presence around me.

1. You are too available, too involved and too easily manipulated.
2. She is very manipulative. And oh how she swings you to her will so!

Since she said she wasn't down for a relationship (most gurls that do hookups do not have time for relationship stress) because of some ills from an imaginary ex, you went ahead to propose Friends with Benefits to gain easy access, which she checkmated. Then you try to play marriage cards which she still saw through.
In summary, you are desperate to hit.

It beats my imagination for a gurl (youve been talking with for 2 month) to spend 4 full days with you on a couch just cuddling.

How can you be talking almost daily for months and not have replaced all her red blood cells with your blue blood cells?

Best thing for you to do is to withdraw. Deploy SENDLESS for a while. Stop calling. if she calls, take your time to take, keep the Convo brief and tell her you've got biz to take care of and roll.
Other times, don't take the call.
Start doing the opposite of all you've been doing.


But the best thing for you to do is to totally ignore her while you spend your time reading from page 1 to 50 of this thread.
Improve your mind and learn the ropes first.

She's got your soft balls on the lock. This is the worst state a guy can be in.

gabulose:
Please someone should help me. How do I continue this conversation with a girl I just met online

Me: Hello, how are you doing
She: I am fine, thank you
Me: your profile says u are good in statistics .pls can you suggest any good material?
She: yes, and she suggested
Me: thank you. I hope your work is going great
She: yes
Me: blank.....

Quick fix n shortcuts are dangerous to health bro

Read the thread.

Your last statement killed everything and she, not knowing the robes about how to keep a Convo or not just interested in prolonging the boring airs, decided to help you kill it too and leave you with mouth dry.

If you read the thread, you'd learn how to flow and keep a Convo light burning If you so suit.

blinking001:
Wonderful piece. The fall of civilisation sponsored and brought to you by feminism. Thanks.

What a title!

sageb:
A lot have changed really.
The moral decadence today is quite saddening.

No doubts.

What step can you and I take daily to correct, however deep we've sunk, these ills?

Rilwayne001:
This is a beautiful piece. Kudos Hardon.

Glass up.

How do we get out of these?

Now, I try as much as possible to avoid social apps

Stephen0mozzy:
LORD! baba your literary prowess na deity-status! Salient points clearly stated and adequately illustrated with befitting figures of speech.

Sadly, this generation doesn't even care no more about who will bell the cat (finding solutions to these ills), they're queuing up hastily to become the cat (the problem) themselves.

Coming from someone who flows words with the precision of a seasoned surgeon's scapel, I am highly flattered.

If this downward slip in morality continues, the community, country and continents would bear the brunt.
Time for sitting on the fence is over, we must wake up and take these ills head on.

Once upon a time, we sat under the bright moon and listened to stories termed 'tales by moonlight'.

Once upon a time, we wrote love letters, signed with a scent, to declare our love intents to ladies that were mostly reserved and shy. They'd play a little hard to get before replying and conveying their acceptance letter signed with a lipgloss powered kiss. Then the fun journey would begin. We knew not what we were doing but there was this strong feelings towards her we couldn't resist nor explain.

Ladies declared theirs subtly by always trying to walk/ride home with us after school, buying us food, defending our interests and/or copying our notes for us.
Landline were a luxury some deployed to reach us if we miss classes in a day. Those that couldn't afford such, came visiting to find out.

Once upon a time we lose sleep and appetite just thinking about our love interests and money was no object.

Once upon a time, getting a first kiss was a treasure we looked forward to and getting down was sexy sacred. But some were scarred because the world had no knowledge of condoms and pregnancies were almost certainly in the offing. Creative Quack doctors saw an opportunity and tapped into it by offering abortions. A little relieve that brought with it eternal consequences, if mistakes occur.

Once upon a time, we ate berries � until they evolved into blackberry, no more fruits but phones. And landlines, once the jewel of the savannah, took an unfortunate bow along with the almighty NITEL and its bulky directories. Now, Even the boss of mobile com; Nokia made way to iPhones and the likes.

Once upon a time, we had James Hadley Chase(the annoying author, who for some strange reasons, specialized in leading you down the passionate path into the desert of spiralling lewd lust , only to cut the fun journey short abandoning you in middle of nowhere). Thereafter, we resorted to Mills and Boon novels, Hints, Better Lover, Best Lover and other erotic magazines whose warm, welcoming and colourful pages welled up our emotions with erotic stories laced with explicit pictures.
They are exhibits that we handled with uttermost secracy and must only be accessed in the corner of the restroom at school or in our bedroom with our doors firmly secured. If not,
unpleasant experiences followed. Parents were more intune and caring, however crude.

Days that, even though s3x sells, they were kept under wrap and the community, country and continents maintained a level of sexual sanity.

Days where a firm pair of br3easts (with very rude n1pples that always stare confidently at you in the face) and virginity were a thing of pride and ladies wore them diligently with dignity.
And those who have lost these, still maintained some level of pride by covering up properly. You only get to know what is what behind closed doors with light turned off( for those that don't know, this is where the very classical philosophy of flipping off the light switch was birthed - to hide the bodily shortcomings of ladies that society frown at)

Then, like the unpleasant jolt into a rude reality from stasis, surrounded by strangers, of the actors in the movie, 'Dark Matter', the 20th century came with a nude incination fury. Like someone opened the Pandora's box, while men slept, and let out a sexual curse powered by social media on the earth.
I woke up from my stasis to behold with a troubling cringe, the daughters of men,at first, testing the waters with shots taken from different angles which must include the accentuated back view. Then, they evolved to making seductive dancing videos with a twirling of the waist while facing the camera. Now, they are all out; click on a video and bOOOOM, it's their twerking bum all over your phone, on your face!

Now, they do anything to get followers, likes, shares which ultimately, ofcourse, fan their fund embers by sealing ads deals. The world is not watching. It is an accomplice, cheering on these attacks on morality. Whatever you do to get followers is of no consequence. What matters is how much clout you sway in the REAL virtual world. The end justifies the means, yea?

Now, you dare not flip on any social app without getting attacked by exposed b0obs that look like huge pawpaw fruits, dropping and almost touching bellybuttons with n1pples, barely covered with ropes tied to the neck, paying homade to gravitational force.
You dare not flip apps without being confronted by scarcely clad body in seductive dance steps; twirling and twisting(to show bedding skills) with tongue sticking out(to show dip thr0ating prowess).

Bo0bs that, once upon a time, should be hiding under heavy push up bras and clothes, have thrown caution to the winds and are out in the open. Vividly in view of the world.
Bodies with huge Zebra crossings that we, once upon a time, rarely see in public are now daringly displayed online, bare, with reckless abandon.

Now, I should correct a notion. The feminine wave that swept all over the world sometime ago, contrary to popular believe, was not really to drag roles with men, it was to embolden ladies to be more daring, careless about body shaming and go all out to express their unclothed assets.

Win ad contracts and get access to top paying hookup guys while at it.

But this has been building up over the years; music videos get lined with scarcely clad vixens and explicit words. Home 'stupid' videos gets laced with the love of money(ritual killings), s3x and more nudes.
They've all exploded in our faces

Now, little boys that, once upon a time, should be playing football after school are gunning after money with the passion of a possessed python by engaging in ritual killings/dealings.

Girls that, once upon a time, should be helping their mothers in the kitchen or sharing gists with friends, have bought accessories (ring lights, cameras/phones) and are on social media selling their wares.

Now, acting Kim K and making sextape is the order of the day.

Dare we deride these times? Dare we question how we got here?

Sodom and Gomorrah would look upon this generation with mouth agape. This is Harvard Standard Immorality. Yet, no letup in sight.

We will explore the AR world, Metaverse, 5G hologram etc with these. The need to be physically in a space with a girl before we can roll wild is gone through the roof. We will discover more.

As a people, it is high time we pay more attention to these ills in the society. It is high time we go back to the crux of the matter and begin to undo our wrong doings.
Parents must pay more attention to their kids. it is not all about providing for them.
We must begin to ask the right questions and not jump at gifts from kids with no sources of income.
The government must watch the junks movie makers push out. Music audio/videos must go back to being clean. High moral values must be inculcated into young minds.
And their creative minds modelled appropriately. This is a ticking time boom. The earlier we tackle it, the better.

And as the day breaks tommorow, I know not what it holds, but one thing is certain as the sun, these are foretellings of things to come and a discerning mind must ponder and use his tongue to count his teeth....


lalasticlala Mynd44 Seun Farano Rocktation (if you may...)

28plus:
Good afternoon Sir Harddon. I just stumbled on this thread and i can relate to 95% of it. I'm not naturally a great conversationist and I don't know how to make them laugh.
I'm in the categories of the good guys, boring guys (albeit unknownly), the wussbags, the ones that go with the intention of dating and is always careful not to offend. Thank you for this thread.

However, my question is, how can I turn the table with the girls already in my hands? Like, for those I've professed love, how can I turn the table and get her chasing me instead?

Thanks

Hi, Don would do just fine.
glad you finally made it, I put this up here for people like you.

As with everything other thing you struggled with before practice made you perfect in them, you have to learn the robes.

Everyone can hold a great conversation, you just have to read wide ( start with how to make friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie) , get comfortable in your skin, hone your skills in the right environment with the right people(gurls that like you but you don't like) and don't be afraid to get it wrong in your baby steps. We fall, we rise. One step per time, b4 you know it, you'd be very good in eliciting laughter from even a rock.

To overcome the nice ass ish, read up this thread, start from the beginning. And henceforth, banish dating from your dictionary. you are not ready for that yet.
Have a mindset of just improving yourself for now, even when you meet new ladies.
this thread would teach you how to Expunge the weak airs and start sending less. Heck, you have nothing to lose. Infact , you are here to add meaning to anybody's life you let into your space.

An employer has no business seeking to please a potential recruit. it's the other way round.

Lastly,
it is not our intention to have ladies come after us, just like moth gets attracted to the force of light, so also, this way of life has a resultant effect of pulling them over.
Seek light first, darkness would naturally flee. ie, don't go looking out for how gurls would chase you, chase knowledge, they naturally can't but come when you hold this knowledge light.

Ok, Bye.

"Life is not meant to be easy, my child; but take courage: it can be delightful. ” ― George Bernard Shaw

Iamzealousman:
Hi good day house.

I have been following this thread since 2017
There's this girl I met in a city, when I met her I was working. She's the churchy type. Though she's independent financially.

Ouch, I wish I had read this way earlier

However, it's better late than never, Zealous man, if she is really your type, and you ain't in for just hit-and-run, I make bold to tell you that you have a jewel on your hands! Hope you haven't messed things up!

I asked her out once last year August she said no. Though she ever since I asked her out she started moving more closer to me.
But unfortunately I lost my job that same August and I wasn't motivated with her anymore. Because she became financially better than me and all sort.

For you to commit this grave sin against me and your royal balls, ASKING HER OUT, you've obviously been skimming through the wisdom littered on this thread like a pig in the possession of a pearl.

Ofcourse, she'd reject you. You sounded like one of a thousand guys out there that have been trying to use love (asking out) as a shunt between meeting and mating. Gurls are wiser gee.
You haven't created any form of value around her yet, haven't broken any defenses, haven't as must as hit her with your sexy witty snowballs, yet you went to pop the love pill.

Now here is the deal;
For her to reject you and still stuck closer even when she is not getting any financial benefits from you means that;
1. she fancies you too. Just that you tried to rush things without owning her mind/world first.

2. She really would love to know the content of your character before any commitment.

3. She senses your insecurities about her being more financially stable. Your actions/subtle words tell tales unknown to you.

I moved away from that city in search of a job, till now I have not gotten another job.
But I around February this year, she called me to inform me that she's gotten a job. And she complained that I haven't been calling her. That are we fighting?

This is why I said she definitely likes you and has been hoping you'd call.
That her, "are we fighting question" means; 'hope you didn't take my rejection wrongly and stopped calling? I just wanted us to know each other better first. I like you toooooooo. Charlie! '

I ensure I stopped contacting her anymore ever since I left that city.
I noticed after she got to Lagos she calls me more often. Even with the fact that I told her of my job status.(unemployed). She still keep calling
In fact around June this year she told me that she misses me. I said okay that I missed her more.

See? SENDLESS works like a clock!
Good a thing you didn't call.
this chasm/sendless attitude has helped you to gain your balls back. hopefully, we'd keep it that way? Though not with that your, 'I miss you more' bullcrap. What sorts of ducky response is that?
Whatever happened to 'i missed ME more?'
or 'yea, I know, If I were you, I'd miss me too?'

Whatever happened to all the cool/classy/cocky and attraction eliciting responses i've thought you? I think you need to go back to page one and do the honours all over again, this time, read slowly and jot points!

She has been trying to get jobs for me tho. She even informed me of a vacancy at her place of work. But unfortunately I missed out at the last stage of the interview.
Tho I like this girl but dating a girl financially buoyant than me is a problem.
And I don't really know what she wants if it's a relationship or friendship.
I wanted a relationship with her tho.

Here are some questions that can light up your path:
1. Do you think a gurl would just go out of her ways to stick around, wen she knows you are not financially stable, if she doesn't fancy you?

2. How many other gurls do you know that have called you for a job opening in their place of work or any other place?
This means; how many other gurls do you know that your concern is their concern and look out for your well being and happiness? Selfless?

3. How many gurls still call you even when you don't call them?

Wake up gee! Free the relationship thoughts and think about securing a job first.

You also need to work on mind as regards your woman being more financially buoyant than you. If she's a good gurl, that does not count. What is hers, is yours. Learnt this the hard way and from my usual source: gurls.
I can't imagine someone that has been following this light, these ways of the superior man, having inferiority complex because of disparity in financial stands.
Do you know how many times that I have pretended to be broke so that I can read the vibes from gurls I'm with? Guess what? most of them weren't really here for money. Heck, I said it long ago that this type of life makes you unveil ladies quickly. they can't hide under any cloud with you.
With the Foundation laid right at the beginning, they are more than happy and even count it a privilege to support you, if ever you whispers a complain to them without you directly asking.

They know a man's true worth lies beyond transient physical cash. His character, his unquenchable voracity for knowledge, his focus and undying spirit, his ideals, dedicated pursuit and the way he treats his woman. they know it's only a matter of time, you'd be super comfy and abundantly cool.

Part of the reasons why I don't know what she wants is that when we were in the same city. We go to church programs together etc and after work every day we walk together. People noticed this and they thought we were dating so she said we shouldn't walk openly together.

Now, I don't even call her she's the one that calls.

Don't let happenings of the past rob you of a glorious future. let whatever happened in the past remain in the past.
This is a new chapter. Hopefully, you would wake up to that rude realization and run with it.

THE GURL WANTS YOUR HAPPINESS and wants you close (hence her looking out for job opportunities for you and even wanting you over at her work place! can't you see? Take it that she is more matured now.

Glow with the flow. Don't ever make the mistake of asking her out again.
If you really want a confirmation that she's really into you, apply the principle I thought about knowing what you want before you even weave your web around a new one. As I said therein, knowing what you want (your vision) helps you to stay focussed and use calculated words that affix that in their mind whenever you guys are chatting/talking or out on a date.
Let's say you want her as you girlfriend:
Let's assume you guys arranged an outing. When she shows up, you can say,

1. 'wow, you look like my gf, but I don't have strenght for your troubles abeg.'

2. Hmm, babes, what is the plan with this your dress, are you trying to seduce me? you'd have to try harder! . den burst some laughter.

3. Wow, Baiby! you look smashing, dashing and dazzling with a cool smile to blend! let's get married already! but hope your anger does not boil beans?

Reciprocate her calls once in a while. Keep it brief though and always be the first to roll until you are comfy.

Read the thread and apply your own modified version into your life.

Ok, Bye

Jewelprince41:
give us more fun Lon and examples for beta understanding

"you are very lucky I'm taken, I'd have made you mine without blinking. We could be JUSSSST friends though, who knows, vacancy might pop up. here, punch in your contact. Ok, bye.

Ok bye

Chuky7:
Even harddon don't know how he behaves

I'm shocked too.
Maybe there is a double somewhere

Oyin2212:

He SENDSLESS

Oh, he is? Tell me something. You mean he doesn't send money?

bigpriik:
There are two factors that changed my love life for good.
1)nairaland
2)bad friends

when i was doing my nd i just have a thing for badboys,i dont like rolling with nerdy friends i find them boring,i prefered boys that smoke,drink and womanize that was how i became a bad boy too,there is this bestie of mine that behaves like harddon he is a natural player rolling with him really opened my eyes about women.
next i will be telling you how i met my first babe.

how does HardDon behave?

If your reason for getting married is to cure loneliness, your marriage is bound to fail.

for marriage is the coming together of two WHOLE adults to chat a course.


Cheers.

You can keep your change btw.

toyini1234:
Dear Tobi,
Happy Christmas and happy new year advance .
Tobi, what did I even want to tell you?
Sorry for calling your name , I remembered you don't like it.
As I was entering this year , I wanted to try put new things; which I did.
It's not as if I want to drag us back to the past , but I want you know that you are like milestone to me.
I had many firsts with you (and hopefully some lasts). With you I've done things I thought I could never do.
As you celebrate your Christmas , I want to thank you for what you've done for me this year. I can't forget you in a while.
Merry Christmas once again.

Don't they just know how to shoot the hook ? cast it in, in a blindly calculated way, let's see the way the cookies decides to crumble. ballest or ballful

Now, here we are. torn inbtw two. brush it off, unlikely, or gush back in full flow.

There, robed in pyjamas.
Cold night, romancing a cold heart.
Tucked under a lean 'warmthless' duvet.
Hugging Ted, the teddy tightly.

There, though, lonely, loveless
Her mind sprung to life
Boundless, it went on a wild voyage
Wishing, Creating, Claiming
Weave the magic wand
Pick, dearest doll, pick
If you can't have them in real life
Here, you're unrestricted; Paint, Pick.

There, therefore, you have it
A brew of 5 studs
Dipped in chocolate
Mind finely made.
Pray, don't wake her up please.

Congrats bro!

For celebrating this small win, may bigger win locate you and all yours!

Cheers!

Adasun:
Happy chrismass:




harddon


undercover...
and all nairalanders.i hope you all have a wounderful celebration.

Merry Christmas!
Grateful as always.
Cheers!

DieRich5:
bad guy............ wow I just saw this thread from someone I'm following I'm doing this format

Don't forget to lace your ways with confidence, a touch of Sendless and quick wit to continue the flow

And here is Nigeria, with no natural disasters, blessed with enormous human and natural resources, armed with the latent energy to be the most powerful nation on earth, scrubbing for scraps no thanks to bad leadership.

61 years after, no vision, no mission, no industry, infested with nepotism and magnanimous debt.

61 years after. but, it is well.

JmyNigaa:
Mr HARDDON I salute you....My Oga’s I hail you all too.
Drills never fail...

Worked so well and in less than a month of meeting this girl , she has submitted to me all round.
Thing now is; she’s always pulling up the; “what are we “ question.
Now even proceeded to what are we doing, what do you want and all of that... (She reduced calls too)
Yes I’ve told her don’t fall in love but she just couldn’t help it....lol....
called her to come meet me at a spot as I told I felt like getting some chops.
We get the items and return to her place to enjoy the consumables and she goes ahead with her question again after saying I’m controlling, I’m not straightforward with my intentions, I’m annoying too....lol

I then bring up how we met, all the drama she’s put up whenever another lady seemed to be getting more attention, how I thought she was a boring nerd but I was wrong. (Had her smiling ear to ear the whole time). Told her I enjoyed watching her do all the impressing me stuff as it makes me happy and told her I wanted to remain Happy and all that. She wasn’t satisfied with the answer obviously she’s expecting me to ask her to be my girlfriend..

I don’t want no ship now... how do I get her off my back with the questions and still keep the interest level on a 100

very read laced with sleek dealings.

Next time she ask that, reply with;

"I've been waiting for you to ask me out babes. Or is your liver failing you?"

She may reply with 'huh? isn't it the guy that is meant to bla bla bla?

reply with , 'well, I'm not your average everyday guy!'.


but if ever she does, which is unlikely,

your reply should be ; ' hmmm, I'd think about it!' �

use these, or fashion others in that line.

Whatever you do, never give her an inch of sway by asking her out. The man died that day.

oh, how my heart bleeds everytime I read this type of tales

If only you know op. if only....