₦airaland Forum

LMAO

redcliff: I bet you dint read the interview...

Gbags of life...!

frederal: it must have been done with slow motion for d wife to have catched up

UWC.

uboma: Thanks for providing the link. The uphill parking is well understood now but parking on a level road with the wheels not in a straight position is still something some drivers need to work on.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ngsD-Nf2CPU

uboma: It irritates when I see parked vehicles with the front tyres not in a straight position, they are either turned to the right or to the left. When parking my car, I ensure that the wheel is straight. How do you park yours?

It depends on where you park oga poster...

Follow this link and learn oga http://www.wikihow.com/Park-on-a-Hill

uboma: It irritates when I see parked vehicles with the front tyres not in a straight position, they are either turned to the right or to the left. When parking my car, I ensure that the wheel is straight. How do you park yours?

@Poster follow this link and learn http://www.wikihow.com/Park-on-a-Hill

FP material.....

I concur

coastal queen: tHEY ALL LOOK GORG APART FROM PIC 2,3 AND 8
Pic2 The turban makes her look ugly
Pix 3 Its high time Dakore got rid of that awful hairdo
pix 8, it would have been cute but something just aint right there

Dis one na Game of thrones oooo.... Wetin be that man name again sef. Wey dey sleep with im daughters and grand daughters

White007: LAGOS - Policemen attached to Ikotun division in Lagos have arrested a man alleged to have been having carnal knowledge of his two daughters between the ages of 10 and 13, in the past two years.

His daughters reportedly claimed to have been going through what they described as horrible experience since their mother left them for another man.

Unable to resist their father, they endured until the elder girl confided in her friend's mother, who then contacted some child rights groups.

The organisations were said to have effected the man's arrest at his 29, Omooye Street, Abaranje, last Saturday and handed him over to policemen at Ikotun division.

Explaining, the elder child (names withheld) said: "Our father started it when I was 11 years old. I did not know he was doing same to my sister who was then eight years.

I only got to know when I saw her blood stained undies and when I demanded to know whether she had started seeing her monthly flow, she revealed that our father slept with her the previous night. He usually crept to either of us at night whenever he wanted to satisfy his urge. He was the one who dis-virgined us."

I beg to be forgiven -Suspect

On his part, the 35-year-old suspect , a commercial bus driver identified as Adewale Adeleke, admitted to the police that he committed the sacrilegious act. He claimed, however, that he did not know what usually comes over him at that point.

Hear him: "I beg to be forgiven. This is the handiwork of the devil because I do not know what usually comes over me. What usually happened was that the urge would just come and before I know it, I would be with either of them."

When news of the act reached the mother of the children who resides in Ibadan, the Oyo State capital, she reportedly rushed to Lagos, where she was quoted as saying that she was shocked beyond words.

She reportedly said she was forced to leave her husband because of alleged battering, in spite of the fact that she was the one responsible for the upkeep of the home. She said while leaving, she handed her two children to her mother with the intention of sending them monthly allowance, only for their father to go and take them.

Executive Director of Esther Child Rights Foundation, Mrs. Esther Ogwu, said her foundation was making effort to ensure that the woman would take custody of her children, adding also that the arrest of the suspect was a first step to ensure that justice was done.

The two girls are now under police protection while their father will be arraigned at the Ejigbo Magistrate's Court by the police.

When contacted, Lagos State Police Command, Public Relations Officer, PPRO, Ngozi Braide confirmed the arrest of the suspect, saying that he would be arraigned in court soon.

http://odili.net/news/source/2013/jul/9/330.html

Good you did your research fast.

Frostyzone: Advice and advise are both correct. One is American way of spelling it while the other is the British way.

It's just like colour vs color or Theatre vs Theater.

¿Comprende?

-------

On further research however I realised my mistake. Advice is a Noun., whereas Advise is a verb.

tony9k was right, Advise is the correct word for that particular sentence.

It's all good.

It is well. Una murder grammar for dis thread sha

K

sandylurv: My relationship in which I had so much hope, where I found true love and hapiness, where nothing else mattered to me in this world has just come to an end because of genotype incompatibility (AS-AS).

I feel shattered ,broken, pained, disconsolate, heavy-hearted, sorrowful, aggrieved, wounded and bruised. My heart bleeds terribly, I've cried myself to sleep several times(usually I feel better after a good cry when I feel bad) but I still don't feel better. I find myself blaming nature, my stupid genotype, and God....I loved him, I still do, with every fibre of my being.

Oh God,we had ‎​so much in common, ideas, views, beliefs, birth month, family structure,physical attributes etc.I know for sure,I'll never find anyone like him **sobbing** Until now,I neva believed any human cud feel this much pain.

The amount of pain I carry in my heart at the moment is such that I keep wishing for death, maybe I would find some peace there. I cant say but maybe I feel dis bad cuz it seems soo easy for him. He has moved on, barely one week after.Maybe its just my imagination but it was really easy for him. I don't know if its usually so easy to let go of someone you truly and really love.

He was everything to me, he made me very happy, my world went round because of him, and now, my world feels so empty without him. We had decided to go ahead initially, with the plan of having CVS with each pregnancy but he is too scared to take that chance. This is the saddest thing that ever happened to me all my life. I still want him. Imagine finding someone you love completely, and finding all u ever wanted in that person but still not be able to have that person.

I'm praying to God for strength to carry on (even though I must be truthful, I'm sorry, but my faith and belief in him has greatly dwindled) as I really don't wanna do anything nasty.I don't understand why God would sit by and watch me go through dis and not intervene.

Any words of encouragement to help me go through dis would be appreciated, as I don't really have my friends around me at the moment and I feel so lonely in this world, plus I really needed to bare my heart one way or the other.

I hope I feel better after this. God bless you.

Trust me, you guys made a right decision. I was in the same shoes a while ago...We had to end our beautiful 11years relationship...It is actually a selfish act to bring in a unhealthy child into your so called "Beautiful Relationship"....When the crisis begin, the first thing that fades away is that so called love you guys have for each other. Then secondly, the little change you guys need for feeding, mini vacations and stuff, will definitely be used to treat the SS child...

I know with God all things are possible, but why dare GOD? I moved on almost immediately after the break-up, because I never wanted an unhealthy child in the first place.

Also, it is of my opinion to hold on to the sweet memories of the 11years we had than to live with sad ones for the rest of my life...

It is just a matter of time...You will be fine soonest...Besides, don't dwell too much on what is gone..!

My quote "It is a selfish act to bring into the world an unhealthy child, knowingly" ....Follow @2ngbaskee on twitter

One love

Angelahoney: Most of the people commenting are men so it is one sided. I want a lady's opinion.

A lady's opinion will only make matters worse..! Especially the egocentric ones. From your post, I sense you are though(Pardon me, my view)..

190:
Fear no further, for God has directed your man to you and his name is --------------------------------------------------> 190


so can we begin familiarizing ourselves with each other

Mad man...LMAO

Angelahoney: Hello Nlanders. I have been hearing a lot about this site for a long time. I often visit this site but I've never been a member.
I have a problem with my marriage and I hope there are matured people who can help.
My husband of 5 years want to divorce me for trivial reason. It even sounds funny talking about it.

Last week he asked me to buy fresh catfish and goat meat. He said he wanted to eat catfish pepper soup, while I prepare egusi soup with the goat meat. I wanted something different so I prepared goat meat pepper soup and used the cat fish for egusi soup.
His inlaws came and they enjoyed it. But my husband was frowning. He said I'm too stuborn and he refused to talk to me. He has refused to sleep with me. I can't go a week without his sensual touch. To crown it all, he's threatening for a divorce. What do I do?

Pls your advice is needed. Thank. (I'm still pretty and marketable but he doesn't appreciate that).

I'd advice you probe that your husband well...! He fit don dey knack another apako..My candid view

[quote author=Okija_juju]1. If he asks for your blood group & genotype - [color=#009900] Its either say na HIV and Gono ehn dey check for.. or na just incase condom bust you carry belle, make you no born sickle cell or Imb[e]cile for am.. [/color]

2. If he wants to know about your family [the size & other details] - [color=#009900] He is trying to guage your levels for the day wey ehn go dunp you.. He is trying to know if your family is connected, if your brothers are cultists, if any of your uncles is in the Army or Armed forces, or anyone is in the Police or even a robber. This is important so he will know wether to relocate to another state or country after dumping you!![/color]

3. If he is interested in your personal development - [color=#009900] Thats to know how you are doing especially financially so he can dupe you or borrow money from you and not pay back.. [/color]


[b]It may be a ladies thread, but I'm sure only a guy can tell ladies what to look out for to know that we are ready to marry.. If I want to know what to look out for when a woman is about to 'mensurate', I will not ask a man[/quote]WTF..! Hilarious

[quote author=Okija_juju]Here are the signs to watch out for if you really want to know if he’s serious about F[U]CKING you.

He Says Things Like “You’re The Only One Who…”

[color=#009900]This is a big lie.. No woman is ever the only one for any man.. This does not mean that he doesnt love you o!! But that story of you being the only one na LIE!! If you doubt me, cheat on him with his best friend lets see if another 'ONLY ONE' will not show up and replace you 'the former only one'!![/color]


You’re Invited To His Family Events

[color=#009900] FA! FA! FA! FOWL!! Before I got engaged, I attended all family functions with a date.. Introduced them to all my relatives sef.. This is not a sign that he wants to marry you o!! INFACT!! Its just to make you relax and open your legs!! Its sort of like Rohipnol.. because you have met his family, you think its settled and then you allow him access your jerusalem!! [/color]

He Considers You Part of His Team
[color=#009900]WTF!!! What team?! Every girl that any guy is f[u]cking is part of his team.. The beauty of a team is that you can tranfer players, buy, sell and loan new ones.. DONT BE DECIEVED!![/color]
.

He Has Married Friends

[color=#009900] CHOI!! This is what should set off the alarm bells.. If all his friends are married and he isnt, that means that he has no plans of marrying anytime soon..[/color].

He Increases His Touch

[color=#009900]Last time I checked, when a Man increases his touch, he wants to f[u]ck.. Meaning 'HE IS H[o]RNY, not a sign that he wants to marry you![/color]

He Wants To Live Together

[color=#009900]DONT BE FOOLED!! NA Housegirl ehn want!! A live in chick who cooks, cleans and f[u]cks him whenever he wants!! Thats every guys dream!![/color]

He Suggests Sharing More Than Just a Bedroom

[color=#009900]ARGH!! Joint ACCOUNT!!! Juju is involved.. Even married men sef no dey mumu this kind mumu talkless of boyfriend and girlfriend paroles..[/color]

His Normal Behavior Starts Going Into Overdrive

[color=#009900] Omo!! If you notice this, he has gotten another babe outside.. Start to pack your bags..[/color].

He Doesn’t Call You Bossy

[color=#009900]I dont even get this one because no guy will date a bossy chick for starters.. [/color]

His Paternal Clock is Ticking

[color=#009900] SINCE WHICH DAY MEN START TO GET CLOCK?! Abi we don start to dey reach MENopause?! Chai!! [/color]

Courtesy: http://DontFallMuguForHim.com[/quote]LWKMD....Good one bruv. Very matured responses. Funny too...!!!!

190: wait am eating, when am done I'm coming baq for u

Don't go anywhere - gimme 10minutes please

GAY-briel a.k.a 190 Learn to mind your business..! Besides it's clear enough "For ladies only".

Obviously you are gay--------> RoosterDrinker osi

People sha...

Anyways it is known that the average minded Nigerian will never take a step towards vast enlightenment. Hence, they discourage those that are trying. Wait and see the outcome of proficiency courses in those that excelled in the future.

Roasted snake is awesome...Try it

maclatunji: Front page kind of thread. I don't doubt you OP. People just want certificates that they cannot defend.

I wonder how many graduates can actually spell "certificate".

Somebody here talked about "Pigeon" and "English". #GoodLord!

Pigeon kor Guinea Fowl ni ..."Pidgin"

chrishenzo: [size=14pt]Maybe we should challenge each other at www.typeracer.com

Seeing is believing.[/size]

If you are ready, drop your typeracer id. I am waitinggg!!!!!!!!!1

2ngbaskee oya leggo

ikakahu: people should stop telling lies in order to get customers/clients.It was all about about this 48 hrs(2 days) period of car delivery that made me venture into such a deal.After 1 wk and 2 days,I ve not yet got my delivery although the biz was not done with the poster but with another dealer who also promised that I will get the car under 48 hrs.My anger here is even if its going to take a month,tell your customer the truth.The most annoying part is that all the gist the guy told me about buying a car in cotonou were all false ranging from prizes to duration of delivery.When you get there,it ll be another story again.From stories to stories.You may even find out that you ve spent more what you would have bought the car in lagos although my main concern was to choose from varieties and not cost cos of my high taste(not by my making) BUT I MUST SAY THE TRUTH THAT I EVEN BOUGHT THE CAR MORE EXPENSIVE THAN I WOULD HAVE BOUGHT IT IN LAGOS.I ve vowed never to venture into such a deal again as next time I ve it in my to get another car,I will simply walk into car shop here in naija .Its only good for those that want to smuggle their cars to nigeria but if you want to pay full duty,my brother,my sister,buy it here in naija or even look for a reliable friend or relation that will buy it for you in U.S.
lest I forget,They told me that cotonou people don t work their cars,that they sell it as it comes but that's a clear lie which I confirmed by my self.They have workshops where they work accident cars and some of these workshops are even within the auto sales yard.I tell you,it was a bitter experience and a case of misinformation and I believe that most people must have experienced this as well.Even when I told two of my friends about this,they equally told me that they had such an ugly experience too,that if i had told them that I was going to cotonou to buy the car,that they would have discouraged me.I don t have time because of my busy schedule but I promised my self that I am going to put a write up as regards this.PLS IF YOU KNOW THAT YOU HAD A DECENT DEAL IN COTONOU,COME AND SHARE IT HERE BUT IF YOU THAT YOU HAD AN UGLY ONE,ALSO EDUCATE OTHERS SO THAT THEY DON T MAKE MISTAKES.

One more important advice,never change a huge sum of amount when going.You can change like 20K so that when you ve have seen by yourself and confirmed that all they told you were lies,you can kindly come back to naija and chang your money to naira and you won t loose so much money.I was cajoled into changing over a million naira and when I saw the truth,I notice that changing the money back would result to more losses and what if being robbed on the way?So that was a serious challenge to me too as I had no option than to buy there.

I am not here to ridicule any body's bussiness but just the sincere truth and experience is what am sharing with you because if you are not well informed,you will be deformed and you know what that means.ALWAYS BE TRUTHFUL!!!

Got my car from cotonou...The only ill-experience i got was the fact that I spent way more on getting it...Although my car got to Naija in just 2days...Was very hard to clear the thought off my head.

From experience, i think i will still go to cotonou to get cars, basically because of the wide variety you will get.

NB: When buying a car, try not to really tag it to price, but the conditions of the car. Don't be surprised that same car could have different prices, based on conditions.

edicolove: Otedola 3 Facrook 0

OteDOLLAR 4 FaCROOK 0

Titusolufemi: Any time I do anything wrong she won't say it,she will just get angry not immediately but when I ask her what I did she wont respond. I will have to beg her without knowing what I did wrong. Again she is too inquisitive (tries to know everything). She never calls me to tell me my wrong. DOES SHE LOVE ME?

Check yourself brother....!!! You are probably being taken for a ride...

Relationship is a 2-way thing...DON'T GAWK...

[quote author=The_Matrix]With 350-400k you can easily get a Nigerian used 3rd hand car from good mechanics or car dealers around, but be careful abt the make: If its a German car, (Volvo, BMW, Benz) it will be more durable/rugged, last longer and still have a good 2nd hand value, but you go buy fuel tire and some parts are kind of relatively expensive.
If on the other hand you get a Nissan, Mitsubishi or even a toyota, you need not worry abt fuel or availability of parts but need I warn you that you may spend more time at the mechanic shop than in your house (simply cos its 3rd hand or 5th hand )
A golf may not be so fashionable but it would do cos since you said you are a low income earner, it has low fuel consumption, the parts are cheaper and available and you fit still use am do kabu kabu later later [/quote]LMAO....kabu kabu things...you dey talk from experience shey...!!!

Tamita: Bros, Keke Napep alone cost 350k.

lol....U af kolo...walahi

illitrate: .....

Farouk now FaCROOK...

Otedola now OteDOLLAR...

Laila Ikeji: The Big Boss back in dem days!!

He was Solek's pianist way back then...!

Good one though