HerexG's Posts
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RedArrow:Must they copy everything his does ? |
RedArrow:J Boss leads the trail and others follows, so Gej keep riding ! |
like huge church bell the word resounded in Suraju's ear and immediately he flashed back to what happened in the early hours of this morning " Eheen so no be that wére boy get dat bag, no wonder him dey act funny when I am to pick him bag, but Emeka na my sure guy dis Chinedu dey very useless for me" (so that bag didn't actually belongs to Emeka, no wonder her was acting funny when I asked if the bag was his, but Emeka is my friend, Chinedu is useless to me) Aggressively Chinedu shouted " No be you I dey talk to ? " (I'm I not talking to you ! ) Like a man brought back to reality Suraju stuttered and replied " Hmm abeg no vex, I dey try remember if I been see any bag but the bag wey I see na the bag wey my boys dey use keep their tools" ( Please don't be annoyed I was trying to remember if I did see any bag but the bag I saw is my workers tools bag) Now Chinedu is growing impatient with his eyes turning red, his nerves rising and his eyes bulging out " OMG ! but the bag suppose dey there now, oya make I see dat ur boys dem bag pointing to his right hand side) ( but the bag is supposed to be there, OK let me see your workers bag) As Suraju saw that this drama is getting tensed he also raised the tempo higher " Your fada ( stretching and spreading his five fingers into his face) Na Wetin your bag dey find for my workshop self, Wetin you come do for my workshop ? (An insult, what is your bag doing in my workshop and what are you looking for in my workshop) ( Back in Emeka's room) " Well if him forget him laptop, Ko kan aiye" ( well if he forgets his laptop is nobody's business) After the laptop finished booting the device window finally opened , then I sighed and said " The foolish boy no even put security for him lappy" ( The foolish boy didn't add security to his laptop) As a very good bad guy that i'm, I quickly opened his email account, i changed his password, and opened all his social media handles and changed their respective passwords. So one after the other I started surfing his accounts , first I started with his Facebook account....... |
Like a kid hustling and rushing to open a Santa Claus gift, I hustled to plug in the laptop charger to my white electric extension box. But before I open and closed my eyes, like a quick snap the electric power people interrupted the power again. I crashed on my bed like a wrecking ball landing on my soft matrass bed, I aggressively and uncautiously exclaimed a derogatory word " F**k ! God punish dis NEPA people, e no go even better for" ( May God punish the people in of nepa , it won't be ) Before I could finish the statement, the light shone right into my eyes " Aaah Dis weré people don bring their yeye light back " ( This crazy people has restored the power back) This time I took it slow and casually to charge up the laptop, luckily for me the laptop was charging properly and the device looks sound. Few minutes later I switch on the laptop, to my surprise Chinedu picture pop out on the background picture of the laptop. " Eeeeh Chinedu ! today must be my lucky day, dis boy wey collect Westy of 500USD just last week, but Wetin come make am forget him laptop " (Chinedu who collected 500USD from Western Union) Back in Suraju's mechanic workshop, Suraju was carrying on with his daily work when Chinedu looking confused litely tapped Suraju " Kamoru Wetin na ! "(Kamoru What ?) " No be Kamoru o na Chinedu " ( Its not Kamoru, its Chinedu) Suraju turned around hastenly turned around in amusement " Aahaan Chinedu Wetin carry you come my workshop now, since wey you don dey collect money you don forget us all" ( Chinedu what brought you to my shop, since you started making you have gotten us all) " See baba no be so o, no mind me joor, abeg no vex" ( I'm sorry, don't be vexed) " Abegi leave story joor, so Wetin bring you come my workshop ? " ( OK so what brought you to my workshop) Chinedu now looking more intensely towards the detached car sit " Hmm abeg no vex o, shey you help me see any school bag for this your workshop" ( Did you see any school bag in this workshop) |
ApexTitan:The western community don't have any business with you if you are not in possession of what they need, they will come to you in decoy, give you peanuts and then after eat you up like cancer. Just like they did to our fore fathers, they claim to come with the best religion ( making our own Gods look inanimate while theirs is the true inanimate) gave our kings peanuts and inturn enslaved us both physically and psychologically. If they claim to be protector of the world where were they when Liberia their colonist was perishing in war, where were they when Nigeria almost perished Biafra. Wake up Africa and be illuminated. |
ApexTitan:Don't be deceived western community fights for only their own interest, they feel the can toss and play Africa like a ping pong, any leader that won't dance to their tune of music they extradite and paint black, the case studies are Gaddafi, our own GEJ (because he won't sign the gay marriage law), Mugabe, Putin, North Korean Leader and many more. Who made them Lord over all nation, to proclaim that you have a personal understanding of what everyone should believe, to me at least, is the height of arrogance. It high time we take care of our own affairs by ourselves without the western interference, that was what the great Gaddafi was fighting for before this same people blindfolded his own people to murder him. |
SeverusSnape:You might call him a Tyrant but he is one of the few African leaders that refused to be controlled like a puppet doll by the western world. He is truly a Lion of African, dem no born any white man well make him misbehave for Zimbabwe as they do in SA |
Jisos thank sir ! I couldn't believe my eyes " A laptop and a modem in a platter of gold for me just like that, yes I no go need go that cafe again where those rude boys dey thief most of my jobs" ( I won't have to go to that Cyber cafe where those rude boys steal my job) While talking to myself excitedly Preye passed by hissing at me saying " Shey this omo Ibo done dey kolo ni, see as him dey talk to himself" ( is this Igbo boy going nuts look at the way he is talking to himself) And she exclaim " Emeka you don dey mad ni, that Igbo wey dey always smoke go kill you one day" She walked pass me trying hard to shake her peanut buttocks, I totally ignored her and said this to her hearing " did I hear a sound of a goat bleating, Isi monkey " ( A monkeys head) (sarcasm) She eyed me and replied " Na your mama you dey talk to, olori buruku okurin" ( you are referring to your mother, stupid man) Fews seconds later Preye went out of sight, I zipped up the bag hurriedly and started walking home. Then I started thinking to myself " Why I'm even this happy, I have not even tested whether if the laptop and the modem is working " Excitement was written all over me even in the way I walk, approaching my one room apartment I saw two kids Ibro and Musa playing football. The kids saw me and greeted me excitedly " Broda welcome " the younger one Musa asked " Broda Wetin you buy for us now " With a smile I removed a 20 naira note bill and handed it over to Ibro the older kid " Take make Una take am go buy biscuit ok" ( Take this use it to buy biscuits for yourselves) Quickly Ibro accepted the money " Broda thank you sir" and they hurriedly fled. I hurriedly dashed at my door knob twisted it and opened my door, I went inside. Inside my house is nothing but a well neatly arranged matrass, a small portable TV, my cooking utensils, plates and spoon all arranged neatly in a small cupboard. On the floor was a cream color carpet to match with the color I painted the wall. Almost immediately I brought down the bag, unzipped it and brought out the laptop. I opened it and pressed the red power button, I gave out a blipping sound and then off again " E be like say the battery dey down and this weree people neva bring light " ( I guess the battery is down and this crazy people hasn't restored power yet) So I laid on my bed faced up, desperately wanting to charge the laptop, I started thinking where to charge up the laptop. All of a sudden I saw a shinning bright ball flashing rays of light into my eyes with excitement I stood up and shouted " Up NEPA ! " ( A phrase we normally shout when power is restored in my hood) |
Thanks ya all I'm humbled |
It was peaceful night out here in the ghetto , one of those night one would love to sit alone and ponder deep about life. There was no power in my house, so I came outside with my earpiece on listening to Olamide badoo’s song ” Prayer for client ” . The punch line of the yoruba rap song was right on point, one of the line caught my attention ” money no go sweet if owu no dey” ( riches won’t be valued if there is no poverty), The very moment i was listening to the song i was dame broke. I listened to that very line of the song over and over again, then I paused the Mp3 playing on my phone, I looked up to sky in an hopeless manner and said to myself ” Baba God shey you dey watch me like dis, all my clients no gree pay again,” ( God will you keep watching me like this all my clients have refused to pay me) I stood up and started walking away from my house. Walking aimlessly on the street i saw kids playing and giggling under the moon, then I looked by my side, i saw the kids parents also laying on their mat receiving fresh air right outside their various houses due to the heat inside their houses, all thanks to the power outage. Then I started soliloquizing……… ” Which day Chinedu start this game wey him done dey pop champagne for club ” (sighed) even just last week here Kunle collect westy of 1000dols why my own case come different na”. ” All these mumu clients wey I get no gree pay, abeg o heaven shine the light on me” ( All these my unserious client don’t want to pay me, please heaven shine the light on me) From the distance I saw a detached car sit in an open local mechanic shop, i sat down feeling all exhausted and tired about life. I rested my head on the sit, shortly after i got drowned in my thoughts pondering on how to make it really big in this big city. A soft sweet air from the west direction blew, giving me a relaxing feeling and I went blackout. The steaming sound of a running car engine woke me up abruptly, and I suddenly jumped up and the unhindered light rays coming from sky almost got my eyes blind and I exclaimed shading my eyes with my hands from the sun rays ” aaaah where I dey now” ! Suraju the owner of the mechanic workshop replied immediately ” Emeka so you no know say na here you sleep ” ( Emeka you don’t know you slept here) ” Really ? O boy I no know when sleep carry me go o Suraj” ( I don’t know when I slept off Suraj) Suraju looked at me suspiciously me and said ” hmm o boy I dey suspect you o, for all the whole place for dis community na my mechanic workshop you see come sleep Emeka ? ” ( hmm I’m suspecting you Emeka in all the places in this community you choose to sleep in my dirty mechanic shop) “Suraj abeg leave story, you no go understand wetin happen jare” ( you won’t understand Suraju) ” E be like say your landlord don pursue you comot for house abi” ( it is like your landlord has evicted you) ” Pursue ke ? you think say I be onigbese like you ” (do you think I’m a debtor like you) ( sighed) Then I shabbily stood up from the chair and involuntary stretched my body, wanting to leaving, as I was about leaving the mechanic workshop. Suraju called me back ” Oh boy ! you no go come carry this nonsense bag you keep here abi ? (Won’t you carry this nonsense bag you left here) ” Which bag ? ” ” Abi you don forget say you bring bag come ni ” ( Or have you forgotten you brought bag here) I looked back towards the direction Suraju was pointing his hands to. I saw a stuffed school bag, hmm no wonder this dude was asking whether if my landlord has evicted me. But that’s not my bag na, well as a sharp ghetto boy I pretended as though the bag was mine, so I went back to pick it up in a kind of manner that you will think that the bag was actually mine. ” Sorry Suraj I don forget, later things na” ( Sorry Suraju I have forgotten, will see you later) Suraju looking at me with total disgust ” yeye boy, make I no see you here tomorrow o” ( Crazy boy, don’t let me see you here tomorrow) I swiftly picked the bag up wondering what will be inside it, with my left hand I pretentiously felt the bag to find out what could be inside it. I hurriedly left, walking a distance from Suraju’s workshop , i calmly dropped the bag on the ground, i bent down and unzipped the bag. Lo and behold the content of the bag is, something like an excited electric current ran through my body as I saw the content in the bag ” OMG ! Wetin be dis ? |
uyplus:If gej has done what he was actually voted for four years ago, he wouldn't be campaigning now, his previous works while in office would have been his number one campaign portfolio. Well done bro for this epic breakdown, good intensions are useless when you fail to apply them, that's gej's case. |
I wonder why ya all is so afraid of this myth called hell, an old antic to recondition the human mind. Sex is to be enjoyed with thy partner, nature can't be tamed embrace it. |
Cherlene:Hello Cherlene what advice do you have for single folks out there waiting on the Lord for there life partner |
dharay99:That looks like a Whale, it has several kinds of meat in it |
Finally something to clamor about on nairaland well done Babyosisi and all the sponsors, i will donate 1000 recharge card to increase the prize of the 4th position . Let the best man win, Game on ! |
UniqueGem:Are these CEO and people in charge of recruiting robots ? Are they not mortals like babyosisi, if private data dey give money, all the Telecomm companies no go dey do advert again. Even 5000 naira jobs these days requires CVs and result. Abeg welcome better thing and stop being an hindrance to a bright young man who will get 18k richer. |
carefreewannabe:These same people you are fighting to protect their privacy have sent this same certificate to a thousand and one companies without getting anything, living in the face of this is earth is risky alone, those who takes bolds steps in making and taking though decisions eats the fruit of the land. |
carefreewannabe:Yeah peoples privacy should be respected, I will suggest they submit their private data should be sent to a private email address, in other news this is welcomed idea. |
carefreewannabe:Do you know that the hoodlums in the street are less privilege too, you can also donate to them and let them use your money smoke weed finish, only give ur resources to who needs it the more and make better use of it, then ur efforts will be well appreciated. Carry on Babyosisi |
carefreewannabe:Abeg leave the lady joor ! The move is worthy of emulation, at least she is waking up the creative spot of our youths, awakening their intellectual ability unlike most multinational company that would invest only on some crappy music talent hunt. More grease to ur elbow ma'am, well done. |
This Abacha guy is an insensitive illiterate animal ! |
Emmalot121:1. "The earth was void nd without shape" while the earth is actually spherical in shape 2. Adam and Eve cannot be the first humans on earth cos the earliest men were a prototype look of a giant rodent 2. The creation of the world can't work out in 7days, it can only take hundred million of years for the earth to metamorphose to this state 3. The characters in the religious books look most times to the sky thinking it is the abode of God ( this shows that they actually never had a clue what is really above the sky) 4. Check the Roman Culture and Christianity examine both critically and give me your answer, let me help you out a bit check this Zeus nd Jesus 5 . The Characters in these religious books re too primitive to stand the sophistication of today even I can go on nd on |
Emmalot121:I'm not saying there is no God but there are a whole lot of questionable factors surrounding these religions |
Emmalot121:I'm sure Moses will be too busy to answer your call, he should be flexing with all the fine fine Angels over there |
Emmalot121:There are no facts in the link you shared, they are just speculations, give me the exact chapter let's buttress it here |
voltron:So the profitability in religion makes religious people teach and defend it even with their life, but if it is supernatural as they so claim, teaching it won't be necessary, all men should have been born with the religious knowledge |
When a child is born into this world, almost immediately the child starts making sound, locating the mothers bosoms for food, at due time starts seeing, responding to internal and external stimulus etc all of these are done without the child being thought on how to do them all and now my question is if religion is something supernatural why is it taught ? |
Emmalot121:I'm trying to tell you that the dinosaurs existed over 6000 years before the advent of man, did Genesis recorded that ? |
Emmalot121:Can Genesis explain the advent of Dinosaurs 6000 years before man |
I'm not fighting for any religion but my question is how then will you explain the great uniformity in this earth since we all know uniformity is the resultant of good planning |
Where is Yak na ? Yakubu Ayegbeni should be in that list. |
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