"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh." - Gen 2:24

@Outstrip  - you have misunderstood the meaning of the holy scriptures that i humbly quoted.  Let me narrate for you, The word of GOD says husbands and wives should love each other unconditionally (Ephe 5.  Where there is love, there is no "denigration", resentment and/ or strife!

What I am saying is that the husband should stop doing what he is doing, change his ways and be a good leader, leading his family in love and in the fear of GOD.  At the same time, the wife and children should not bear resentment toward him, but pray for him.  Their conduct could influence him to be a better man, though ultimately, GOD changes the heart.

Does this advice make "christians look bad"??

If some christians look bad, it is because of their own doings. Not every Christian is truly a Christian.
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"Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven." - Matt 7:21

The husband is the head of the wife, and his household, GOD being the Head of all. A leader ought not sink his own ship, but, by GOD's grace, lead by example in love.

"And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged." -Col 3:17-21

Tell him that there is to be no divorce for any reason, truly. - "Know ye not, brethren, (for I speak to them that know the law,) how that the law hath dominion over a man as long as he liveth? For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband.  So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to another man, she shall be called an adulteress: but if her husband be dead, she is free from that law; so that she is no adulteress, though she be married to another man." - Rom 7:1-3

Pride usually stands in the way of conflict resolution. For "Only by pride cometh contention: but with the well advised is wisdom." - Prov 13:10.    Tell them to pray and study the word of GOD together (starting with Ephesians 5).  Unconditional love, by GOD's grace, will overcome all differences.

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"Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." - Matt 19:6 

"For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously." - Mal_2:16

It ought not be so, unless done by mutual consent in order to fast and pray for a time.

"Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency." -1 Cor 7:2-5

"In his days Judah shall be saved, and Israel shall dwell safely: and this is his name whereby he shall be called, THE LORD OUR RIGHTEOUSNESS." - Jer 23:6

"No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and their righteousness is of me, saith the LORD." - Isa 54:17

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"I will greatly rejoice in the LORD, my soul shall be joyful in my God; for he hath clothed me with the garments of salvation, he hath covered me with the robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom decketh himself with ornaments, and as a bride adorneth herself with her jewels." - Isa 61:10

“Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.”- Prov 31:30

@op, humbly, yet truly, re: the law of the land, and in this case, The Law of GOD, ignorance of the law / "i didn't know" is not excuse or a valid defense. You have committed adultery. I thank GOD that at least your conscience troubles you. Know that “The Lord [is] gracious, and full of compassion; slow to anger, And of great mercy.” - Pss 145:8. So, pray for mercy and remove yourself immediately from that situation and advise the woman regarding the same thing going forward. May GOD bless you.

@op, humbly, yet very firmly i tell you, you ought not even look at her the wrong way.

"But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart." -Matt 5:28

"And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire:" - Mark 9:47

You do well for your own sake not to engage - "But whoso committeth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding: he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul. A wound and dishonour shall he get; and his reproach shall not be wiped away.  For jealousy is the rage of a man: therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance.  He will not regard any ransom; neither will he rest content, though thou givest many gifts."- Prov 6:32-35
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"Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body." - 1 Cor 6:18

@op,

it isn't easy to accept, but I'd advise him to pray for wisdom and a forgiving heart (Matt 18:21-22).  He can learn to love and accept his wife's daughter as his own (put himself in the daughter's shoes).  Most important, there is to be no divorce for any reason. It is "for better or for worse", "till death do us part".  A vow is a vow, particularly before GOD, among witnesses that we ought to try to keep  -  "For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband." -  Rom 7:2

"Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." - Matt 19:6

@Ninapha, truly, it applies to every adulterous situation, except if a person is truly justified in and by The Lord JESUS CHRIST. It even applies to a lustful looking,

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"'But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart." - Matt 5:28

I tell you truly, “Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” - Hebrews 13:4

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"Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God" - 1 Cor 6:9-10

Gently and humbly tell her that - “Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” - Hebrews 13:4

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"Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God." - 1 Cor 6:9-10

Yes indeed,  “For the wages of sin [is] death; but the gift of GOD [is] eternal life through JESUS CHRIST our Lord.”  - Rom 6:23,

“Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.” - Acts 4:12

“So then faith [cometh] by hearing, and hearing by the word of GOD.” - Rom 10:17

“The Lord [is] gracious, and full of compassion; slow to anger, And of great mercy.” - Pss 145:8

@op,

I do feel pity for you, but truly I am thankful to GOD that at least you're diligently searching the holy Scriptures. - “So then faith [cometh] by hearing, and hearing by the word of GOD.” - Rom 10:17

The holy Bible is truly the most harmonious book there is or ever will be. I tell you, the things that appear to be contradictions, are not contradictions. That's the way GOD wrote / inspired it. In addition, and most important, The Lord JESUS CHRIST must open a person's eyes in HIS mercy to see truths in the holy word of GOD, otherwise, we will not see, particularly to the saving of the soul.

"And when he was alone, they that were about him with the twelve asked of him the parable. And he said unto them, Unto you it is given to know the mystery of the kingdom of God: but unto them that are without, all these things are done in parables: That seeing they may see, and not perceive; and hearing they may hear, and not understand; lest at any time they should be converted, and their sins should be forgiven them." - Mar 4:10-12

"And he said unto them, These are the words which I spake unto you, while I was yet with you, that all things must be fulfilled, which were written in the law of Moses, and in the prophets, and in the psalms, concerning me. Then opened he their understanding, that they might understand the scriptures, And said unto them, Thus it is written, and thus it behoved Christ to suffer, and to rise from the dead the third day: And that repentance and remission of sins should be preached in his name among all nations, beginning at Jerusalem. And ye are witnesses of these things." - Luke 24:44-48

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"But the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned." - 1 Cor 2:14

@op,

These things are parabolic in nature - "All these things spake Jesus unto the multitude in parables; and without a parable spake he not unto them:" - Matt 13:34. This verse / these verses, like virtually all of the holy Bible are pointing to a person's salvation by the grace of GOD. First and foremost, the salvation of a person's soul from the righteous wrath of GOD for sin through HIMSELF, in The Person of our Lord JESUS CHRIST by the hearing of the word of GOD - “So then faith [cometh] by hearing, and hearing by the word of GOD.” - Rom 10:17.

All mankind is born in sin, but when The Lord JESUS CHRIST saves, by HIS grace and mercy, we are translated / adopted into the Kingdom of GOD - "Who hath delivered us from the power of darkness, and hath translated us into the kingdom of his dear Son" - Col 1:13. Thus, as a true servant of The Lord GOD, as we preach the gospel to others, and they hear and are saved by the operation of GOD, GOD through us is casting out demons / darkness, etc and translating us to The Light, also illustrated by The Lord JESUS casting out demons, literally, out of people, as well as healing the sick, raising the dead - these were all signs pointing to salvation of the soul. "We know that whosoever is born of God sinneth not; but he that is begotten of God keepeth himself, and that wicked one toucheth him not." - 1 John 5:18

Though the gift of speaking in tongues is quite real, as affirmed by GOD through the apostle Paul -"I thank my God, I speak with tongues more than ye all: Yet in the church I had rather speak five words with my understanding, that by my voice I might teach others also, than ten thousand words in an unknown tongue. " -1 Cor 14:18 -19;
And the apostles spoke in the native tongues of the people to whom they preached after they received the HOLY SPIRIT, I believe that the new tongues here is unfettered praise to GOD as a result of being truly saved. We sing / speak GOD's great praises that are acceptable to HIM through our Lord JESUS CHRIST - "And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the LORD." - Psa_40:3

Also note that GOD protects HIS own from evil and evil forces - (Psalm 91), Glory be to GOD in the Highest!

@op,

humbly, you're better off using most of your tithe money to buy holy Bibles and giving them to those that don't have, as well as distributing the rest of the money to the poor. (1 Peter 4:17).

We tithe at least 10% of our income, however, we, by GOD's grace, tithe our entire being. - "I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service." - Rom 12:1

The Lord JESUS CHRIST, Alpha and Omega, The Almighty (Rev 1:7-8), is from everlasting past (Prov 8:23, Mic 5:2), was slain from the very foundation of the world (Rev 13:8), and is thus able to save all mankind upon whom HE has mercy, by HIS grace, to the uttermost, from Abel, to Enoch, to Abraham, to David, to Peter, to the very last man / woman that HE saves before HE returns. "Wherefore he is able also to save them to the uttermost that come unto God by him, seeing he ever liveth to make intercession for them." - Heb 7:25

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"Your father Abraham rejoiced to see my day: and he saw it, and was glad. Then said the Jews unto him, Thou art not yet fifty years old, and hast thou seen Abraham? Jesus said unto them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Before Abraham was, I am." - John 8:56-58

@op, your statement is untrue and unprofitable to you and to all.  “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of GOD;” - Rom 3:23;  

"As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one: There is none that understandeth, there is none that seeketh after God.  They are all gone out of the way, they are together become unprofitable; there is none that doeth good, no, not one." - Rom 3:10-12

Thus, we should all be more interested in our personal relationship and reconciliation back to GOD through HIMSELF, in the Person of our The Lord JESUS CHRIST. “For the wages of sin [is] death; but the gift of GOD [is] eternal life through JESUS CHRIST our Lord.” - Rom 6:23
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“Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.” - Acts 4:12
“So then faith [cometh] by hearing, and hearing by the word of GOD.” - Rom 10:17

I humbly and strongly suggest that you "Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." - Phil 4:6-7 ("be careful" = be anxious for nothing).

Take your time, there is no rush. Though you believe you're in love and vice versa, again, take your time. Marriage is a very serious, life-long commitment. "For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that. I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I. But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn." - 1 Cor 7:7-9, because - “Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” - Hebrews 13:4

Ultimately, as a child of GOD, you also want to be concerned about not being "unequally yoked" (2 Cor 6:14)

Do you both believe the same things re: your faith, etc? These things often materialize shortly after the marriage because, love, as they say, is blind. So again, take your time, you're still quite young, not too young, but young. May GOD bless and guide you.
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"NUN. Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path." - Psa 119:105
"In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." - Prov 3:6

@op,

"Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry: For which things' sake the wrath of God cometh on the children of disobedience:"- Col 3:5-6

“For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.”- Rom 8:6-7

We ought not judge anyone personally, because "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?" - Jer 17:9; “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of GOD;” - Rom 3:23
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“For the wages of sin [is] death; but the gift of GOD [is] eternal life through JESUS CHRIST our Lord.”  - Rom 6:23

@Dis Guy,

Maybe you're right, GOD knows. That's why its all about one's personal relationship and reconciliation back to GOD through The Lord JESUS CHRIST, The Almighty (Rev 1:7-, by the hearing of faith / the word of GOD (Rom 10:17).

In these last days the churches are under GOD's judgment - "For the time is come that judgment must begin at the house of God: and if it first begin at us, what shall the end be of them that obey not the gospel of God? And if the righteous scarcely be saved, where shall the ungodly and the sinner appear?" - 1 Pet 4:17-18

@op,

Try to forgive, asking GOD for the grace and strength to do so. It isn't easy, but "with GOD nothing shall be impossible".  Plead with your husband to stop, gently expressing how hurt you are by it all.  Spend time in the word of GOD together and in prayer, in essence, as The Lord JESUS commands, "watch and pray".  "Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak." -Matt 26:41.  One is more prone to these sort of things if one takes one's eye's of GOD.  "By mercy and truth iniquity is purged: and by the fear of the LORD men depart from evil." - Prov 16:6
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"And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you." - Eph 4:32  

"Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye." - Col 3:13  

"Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?  Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven" - Matt 18:21-22

Sign of the times, but we needn't stand in personal judgment because, looking in the mirror we can see that truly all sin is sin (though some are more abominable), “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of GOD;” - Rom 3:23,  “For the wages of sin [is] death; but the gift of GOD [is] eternal life through JESUS CHRIST our Lord.”  - Rom 6:23  

However, its a sign of the times.  Its a reason why GOD destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah and its neighboring cities.  Its no story and its no joke.  The world is like it /them, and will suffer a similar fate (2 Pet 3:10-11.) - "And turning the cities of Sodom and Gomorrha into ashes condemned them with an overthrow, making them an ensample unto those that after should live ungodly; And delivered just Lot, vexed with the filthy conversation of the wicked:  (For that righteous man dwelling among them, in seeing and hearing, vexed his righteous soul from day to day with their unlawful deeds" - 2 Pet 2:6-8
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"Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination." -Lev 18:22

“Who changed the truth of God into a lie, and worshipped and served the creature more than the Creator, who is blessed for ever. Amen. For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even
their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature: And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.” - Romans 1:25-27

^^^ friend, there should be no divorce for any reason! "Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." - Matt 19:6

@op,

In a gentle, respectful, yet in a firm way, go to your neighbor with your husband and explain the economics of paying for electricity, as opposed to fueling and running his generator alone. You should at least begin there, - "And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient, In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth;" - 2 Tim 2:24-25

"Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men. If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men." - Rom 12:17-18. You will not be in this situation forever, so do the right thing, particularly what is right in GOD's sight, by HIS grace, to HIS glory.

Remember - "A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger." - Prov 15:1, "For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God." - James 1:20

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"But now ye also put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth." - Col 3:8

"Cease from anger, and forsake wrath: fret not thyself in any wise to do evil. For evildoers shall be cut off: but those that wait upon the LORD, they shall inherit the earth." - Psa 37:8-9