₦airaland Forum

Obiagelli: I heard universities are now offering courses on commitology

They are using the new curriculum

superior1: Opee ooo, dem go take by the time i return to the village, i will from cassava bread committee recommend cassava bread mobilization committee and from that cassava committee review committee. By the time the shoe-less man leaves presidency, i for don build like 10 houses for my village. Abeg Inik, i will be waiting, no disappoint me ooo

10 houses? Efcc dey on ground o

musiwa23: so you think. i am a con artist. go ask goodluck jonathan.. if he knows my name musiwa..

We have always known that. Musiwa we humbly request that you show us some satellite maps to validate this fact

Ironi: Every Nigerian you meet is either a homosexual or Just a dumb freak in behaviour. Why?

And you dimwits seem to be proud of such social misfits.

No wonder the country is in such shiit.

Go ahead Boko Haram, clean house now.

How much are you paid to troll nairaland?

[quote author=*idriis*]so why is it here again?








Take it to the nudity section[/quote]I hope Seun and mukina are listening

mrnestyy1985: Hi Bro,

That idea of a premier league Apps is a bomb. im not a football follower so i cant tell if its a Virgin idea. . well taught but with some setback. Try not to charge money for your Apps at least until you get more than a thousand users otherwise you will end-up loosing passion for it because you are not making any money from it.There are other ways of making money from mobile Apps. Have you wondered why Watsup as popular as it is happens to be free in some phones?Do you think the owner is not making money from it?

Rather than requesting money from people in an infant Apps then later spend alot of money doing marketing.why not offer it to some number of people and allow them do the marketing for you for free.


I will not encourage your idea No 2 and the last.Why?

Because if Nigerians actually spend so much time doing research on their thesis,im sure they will find solution to Nigerian problems.Most Nigerian endup recopying an old thesis.thats why Nigeria has lots of setback.sometimes i think the westerners are in 2050s while Nigerians are still in 1940s and the only reason i can link to it is that Nigerian university graduate always do research on old topics already discussed and the lecturers do not have a tracking system to track past thesis so they just score them grades with ease.

If there is a database of Nigerian university thesis like they have in obodo oyibo,im sure many graduate student in Nigerian wouldnt have to look for job after graduation because their thesis have provided them with links for job opportunity.

Your last idea about movie download site.you already gave an answer to it.you can make a small fortune in a short time but when you are caught?bro,you will surely make the jail or prison your home within a short time.

Tips: Being a student in a student environment,Maybe you can create a website that links student looking for reading partners/discussion partners.The partner could be based on different department,topics or sex(Male/female). you might be the next student e-environment owner and work in the path that Facebook owner walked but more focused on the Nigerian student.
You might require some programming partner or you could outsource it, feel free to explore the tips

Thanks

nwgoziri: 4ur mind...wat of u dat is always peepin ur gal yash...ewu

You don"t know me

adaobi123: awwww thank you hun

You are welcome

Victor lustig was the greatest con man ever with Weil the "yellow kid" coming a close second. When i first read about him through some excerpts in Robert greene"s "48 laws of power" i was amazed and went online to dig out more info about him. It is amazing how he managed to sell the Eiffel tower twice and pocketed the money. In the end crime does not pay, he should have used his knowledge of human psychology and exceptional IQ to fight crime.

Adaobi is a nice lady and she seems like someone that has a cheerful personality. I hope she stays that way

Tonto Pr people are really doing their work. The aim is to keep pushing tonto dike"s image up in our faces 24/7. I hope they are aware of the fact that "overfamiliarity breeds contempt"

i wish him a quick recovery, i hope after this incident he will "start using his head well". This what ordinary nigerians pass through everyday on our roads.

This same thread was on the front page two days ago https://www.nairaland.com/1260527/ini-edo-wearing-black-dress

Mods can this topic get to the frontpage? https://www.nairaland.com/1263460/how-professional-government-committee-member#15324898 It is a lighthearted topic meant to diffuse the tension in this section

superior1: Too bad, I was hoping i can get a position in cassava bread committee, i did cassava farming for about 2 decades i was staying in the village. I get plenty plenty experience, are you sure you cant link me??, we will share the committee allowee 60-40.

In that case i'll see what i can do. Exercise some patience, the government is presently busy with the composition of the boko haram amnesty committee. By next week things will have returned to normal and more committees will be formed. I will send in a proposal and hopefully a cassava bread committee will be formed

superior1: Like how much i fit make, you go fit link me because e be like say u know the matter well well o

Lol i am just an outside observer

Before now, being a member of a government committee meant sacrificing your time for a task that comes with hard work with little financial compensation, today the situation is different. Ever since our fedora hat wearing president came into power we have been practising committocracy (government of the committee by the committee and for the committee members). You really don”t have to do any serious work, all you have to do is to show up at the venue of the committee sitting and wait for your bank to send your sitting allowance alert sms. Your committee will be allocated a certain period of time to work and submit a final report, just show up at the committee hearings everyday and you are even free to doze off when the proceedings becomes too boring.

You can”t stay in your village and expect to be appointed to head a committee by the “oga at the top”. You have to go to Abuja and join your fellow “distinguished” nigerians to lobby for the position. When you are in Abuja, check into the Transcorp hilton hotel and lodge there (don”t say you don”t have money to pay for the luxury rooms, you can borrow from friends, when you are appointed to a head a committee you will always pay them back). That is where the power brokers go to chill off, hold their meetings and events and where you will have to strike an acquaintance with some of them. Also move around the posh and high brow areas of Maitama and Asokoro, you will find many of them here. If everything works according to plan, you will find someone who will lobby for you and ensure that your name gets pushed up to the “oga at the top”and you will finally a slot in the next committee that will be formed.

Now that you have been appointed to head the committee your mission has been accomplished. At the end the period assigned for your deliberations your committee will have to submit a white paper where you present your findings and recommendations to the government. You and your committee members know deep within yourselves that you have not really been doing the job well, so what are you going to submit?.....Don”t panic, you can pay someone to write a report full of technical jargon (Govt officials do not bother to read reports talkless of acting on them, as soon as they come in they are promptly filed away or swept under the carpet) or you can submit an empty sheet of paper as your final report. Its no big deal because another committee will be quickly set up to investigate the “remote and immediate causes” behind your empty sheet report. With luck, you can be even be appointed as a member of the new committee...Now your committee membership career is blooming.

These terrorists are always thoroughly brainwashed

A very nice speech but it is coming from the wrong person

She looks irresponsible

This offer is too little, too late

Another waste of front page space

Waste of front page space

UncleSmart: The Association of Witches and Wizards in Nigeria has warned former Head of State and leader of the Congress for Progressive Change, CPC, General Mohammadu Buhari to bury his ambition of ruling Nigeria ever again.

Dr. Okhue Iboi, the acclaimed spokesperson of the Association in an interview with Sunday Express asserted that witches and wizards in the region would not allow him to spearhead the affairs of the nation again.

He further stressed that Nigeria would not break-up after 2015 contrary to what Dr. Fasheun and the American government predicted.

According to him, “During the meeting we held on January 29 in Ilorin, we talked about the government of this country.

Goodluck Jonathan will re-contest and he will win the 2015 election irrespective of whatever opposition that rises against him,” the coven’s spokesman affirmed.

On the menace of Boko Haram, Iboi said, “We gave the witches in the North the mandate to cool down Boko Haram; mark my words, by the end of this year, you will hardly hear of any Boko Haram mayhem again.”

The extensive interview with the witchdoctor was not all glad tidings, however, his revelations raised serious concerns about the 2015 election.

“Some people are prepared to frustrate President Jonathan by all means and these people would resort to foul means. But in doing that, they will jeopardize Nigeria. I beg Nigeria to pray. Let us all pray, Christians, Muslims and herbalists,” he said seriously.

Continuing he stated “there will be many disturbances during the primary and at the main election, a lot of bombs will be thrown around. But I can assure you,” he said, “Nigeria will not break or divide as the Americans have prophesied.”
The witches’ imagemaker further foretold the future of politics in the country. He started with the proposed merger parties, APC and its chances of challenging the dominion of the Peoples Democratic Party, PDP.

“This mega party when we looked at them and their future, they are good, they have good intentions, but at the last minute, before election, they will be thrown into disarray; they will have a big disagreement that will shatter the party and in-fighting over superiority. This discord will not be settled until the elections hold.”
Similarly, he also divulged the council of witches’ verdicts on some political personalities. In the case of General Muhammadu Buhari, one of the key opposition politicians against the PDP-led government and a crucial actor in any serious coalitions, Iboi unveiled a damning verdict. “If Buhari contests 100 times, he can’t rule this country again,” Iboi began, “because the “pillars of the north at night” have no likeness for him. They would not let him rule this country.”

Witches’ stance towards former military president Ibrahim Badamosi Babangida was not any different. “Babangida can take his money to support another party but he can’t rule this country again.”
On the contrary, former President Olusegun Obasanjo fared better as he was in the good book of the witches. “Till the day he will die, Obasanjo will still be important and relevant to the Nigerian politics. That is his destiny,” Iboi affirmed.

Iboi who claimed to be in the fourth year of his seven-year tenure as the coven’s spokesperson also spoke about the coming wrath of witches over Nigerian politicians. “Some of the politicians that are using other people’s destiny, I mean those who steal other people’s luck, between now and next year, God’s wrath is coming upon them,” he threatened. “And as for the current PDP National Chairman, he will have his hands full with many problems that will eventually swallow him.”

He expressed hope that a better Nigeria lies ahead, he said, “In the meeting we had last year in Niger State, we gazed into the future of this country and we discovered that Nigeria will still be better.” But before then, he opined that a cleansing will take place. “The bad elements disturbing this country will have to be removed and that will happen in no distant time; one by one, they shall all perish. Then, Nigeria will get better. And I tell you, the youths will enjoy this Nigeria, but that time is not in the immediate future,” he concluded.

http://dailypost.com.ng/2013/04/18/if-buhari-contests-100-times-he-cannot-rule-this-country-again-association-of-witches-and-wizards-in-nigeria/

There is no communion between light and darkness! you cannot be an agent of the devil and be mentioning the name of God. This man should better repent or else the wrath of God will fall upon him.

The old obnoxious perennial election loser/bigot with a messianic complex is set once again to contest 2015 presidential elections. No problem, we are waiting for him at the polls and we will ensure that this time around he records the lowest number of votes ever in the history of presidential elections in Nigeria. Why can"t this sharia mongering wild-eyed fanatic realise that his time had passed and that we are living in a new era devoid of relics of the past like himself?....smh

Waste of front page space

@mrnestyy1985 these are great ideas. I like your way of thinking. The problem always lies with the implementation and commitment to put them to reality after the initial wave of excitement passes away.


While reading this thread i started thinking on how to make money from the English premier league fans we have here. @mrnestyy1985 apart from the normal viewing center businesses that people operate can you think of any way we can make money from the huge fanbase of European league teams in Nigeria?

These are two ideas that just came to my mind

1) English premier league
Nigerian youths are crazy about the english premier league, there are many fanatical supporters of different clubs. If you are an app developer you can make an Epl mobile app that can send team news alert to fans. For e.g a Man utd fan will get alerts on match days on the time of the game, the team list, the goal scorers at the end of the game and the date of the next game. Make the app available for download on your site and charge a monthly service fee of let"s say 500 naira. If 100 people pay for the service that will earn you 50k for one month. With time you can add other features as your subscriber base increases.

2) University and polytechnic students
Most students do not know that there are other search engines apart from Google and they do not also know how to use keywords to get good search results. If you are a good researcher and conversant with search engines and ebooks, with your laptop and internet connection or a smartphone, you can help your colleagues and other students search for info for their assignments, term papers, project topics etc at a fee that will be fixed by you. Just tell them and you will be surprised by the number of requests that you will get. You can send them the materials they want via email after they have paid you.

Also you can download different movie series and hollywood movies from the numerous download sites that are available online into your laptop and transfer them to anyone who wants it for a fee, let"s say 100 naira per movie, you will make a small fortune in a short time.

I weep for Parenting in America

If he is coming, i"ll be there

I see desperation

Wat a gwan inna this thread

Mr..cork i see you

Soso990240: 4 ur small mind..whch one fashola go attend?

I guess you have an extra large mind. Fashola will attend both events

[quote author=obo_man]haha... dat man behind her has dis kind of face I usually have when.....


a) I wanna concentrate and make my money. Film/direct dis scene, get the cds in the market and make money...
( keeping it professional kinda face)

b) I'm not really interested becos she ain't my type....

c) I actually just smashed her some hours ago, so no biggie,, [/quote]