₦airaland Forum

valacious:
am not a babe itgurilie, am a guy,

Sorry for the mix up thanks for your word, hope we're cool now

googles:
Are the chicz parents illiterates? cos IMO i dont think any educated person with self-worth will throw his daughter at just any body who's carrying

nope they are not, it's just because the guy comes from the same place as them

Onchedu:
Parents do realy complicate things sometimes.

Must she get married now?

The parents feel she should since she's thru with school and will soon get a job

Aproko:
^^^^^^^^^ more like is the girl a liability? why will any parent want to 'dash' out their daughter because of euros if the daughter is an asset to herself and to them?

You know some parents believe that once a girl is thru with school, the next thing is marriage.
No she's not a liability

otokx:
There is no confusion here; marriage is between a man and a woman unless of course the parties involved here are not man and woman perhaps boy and girl. Is the man working? is the woman working?

A mature man who has a job and a mature woman who's a graduate

[quote author=na2day? link=topic=459696.msg6179106#msg6179106 date=1276059192]funny enough, u were only finger pointing the guy until i called u out on it.[/quote]I wasn't only finger pointing the guy both of them consented to the act and are now blaming it on liquor

chika98:
She needs to take some action. Sitting there and praying to God won't help her at all.

If she wasn't confused this thread won't be here
She doesn't want to disobey her people and she wants to marry who she loves
So what else do you advice her to do cos her parents are not listening to her

[quote author=na2day? link=topic=459696.msg6179091#msg6179091 date=1276058580]so the girl was the one out of her senses? all these hypocritical judges sef [/quote]The both of them are to blame, not only the guy after all he poured his stuff somewhere

@ poster MOVE ON
abortion or no abortion, it will come haunting in the future with him
So move on, I pray the good Lord will give you someone to call YOUR OWN,cheers

@ poster I'm very sure the guy was in his senses when he was pouring into the girl, he's just looking for who/what to blame his act on and it was on poor liquor

agathamari:
is your friend older then 18? if she is it is her life and no one elses. if her father is so intrested in a marriage with this boy let him doit. noone is going to live your life for you, marry who you want not who omeone else wants being in the end you have to live with the choice

yea she's more than 18, in her 20's. I actually told her if her parents are so into the guy from Europe let her mom become a second wife she has a right to her own opinion, but mostly let her seek the face of God

Ebonyeyes:
I think this is modern day slavery. Parents selling their kids to 2nd hand Nigerian men who already have wives abroad.

I Don't think they plan on taking their nigerian wives with them to avoid confrontation and it's just bad

Ebonyeyes:
Its the situation people are in Nigeria, I cant say I blame the parents, The filthy politicians are despoiling that country and everybody has to survive however which way they can.

not enough reason to have a foreign wife and then come back home to be the good boy

MRbrownJAY:
@poster
isnt that the scenario that happens in 9ja every other weekends?! by the look of NL, it seems like it.

this gal has a choice to make and, whichever she will make, she will loose!

marrying someone that you have no care for is equally as wrong  as eloping to marry some guy and possibly never speak to your parents ever again.

this should be the follow up of the thread about people going back home to marry hoping to find "better wives" LOL!!!!

new thread title:"parents selling their children to anyone who set foot outside Africa"

Should she sacrifice her happiness so that her parents can be happy
I just don't know why parents want to fulfill their dreams through their children

No jokes cos this is serious

Ebonyeyes:
I guess girls are flipping the script these days.

Maybe she doesn't know what she wants

switpea:
u be man abi woman?

I wonder oh! Homo or Straight

valacious:
Have a talk about your future with this guy you love, then get a cue of his feelings for you.

Dont forget to pray too.

Thanks a lot girl, that's what am on now and I believe the will of God will be done. Cheers

[quote author=Lord_Reed link=topic=459630.msg6177616#msg6177616 date=1276030514]Are the parents aware of this?![/quote]yes they're, but according to them it's just for papers and nothing is there after, most of the guys outside naija do it (the parents opinion) and that's what angers me

They just believe what the guy said without considering their daughter's happiness and it's just unfair

I was talking with a friend recently and she told me she was facing this real marriage dilemma

It happens that her parents want her to marry this guy who just came back from Europe, because they are from the same place. She's in love with someone else who's going to marry her when they're both ready. but they're not from the same place.

She discovered from sources that the guy who just came home from Europe already got married to a white woman (so that he can get his papers). Her people are pressurizing her to get married, she doesn't want to rush things so that she won't make the wrong choice.

Now she's faced with obeying her people or eloping with her love if her parents still refuse the union. I told her to search her heart and pray let God order her steps. Please what do you all think?

valacious:
I'd rather be loved than to love.

For me it has to be reciprocal I love someone and may feel he doesn't, only to discover he does because he wants to be sure I love him too

You don't need any advice here there are a lot of unmarried young guys around, just wait for your own and don't be a home wrecker

Na real wao! So what should we all do fantasize

Onchedu:
All it takes to fertilize an egg is one spermatozoa. Myt be released even before expulsion so there's no telling which spermatozoa did it. Withdrawal on it's own won't guarantee the intent was a success.

Heavens U have to come down from against your will but for your good aren't worth risking too much for.

The point of this discussion is is to assert the mandate to marry a girl just cos she is carrying a child she says is urs. We have agreed that both parties need to take responsibilty for their decisions. Now what we have not agreed is whether or not marriage is a mandatory part of taking responsibilyt for a pregnant woman.

My point is girls should know better than to think or imagine that when they get pregnant for a man he automatically owes them marriage. E no dey work like that.

One would think that with the number of women left with babies they didnt plan for growing old and still fantasizing that the man responsible with them will one day get rid of the wife he married before or after their romance gone wrong and marry them dotting the map, the yunger generation of women would know better.

The best decision in all this is abstinence No girl should use pregnancy to tie a guy down and you guys should also know what you're about to get into (Broken CD, withdrawal, etc) one minute of pleasure could result to anything so be wise

Onchedu:
It's interesting that U would hammer on the condom part and neglect the fertility period part of my post.

What's wrong with pushing the guy off cos U don't want to have a baby U expect him to marry U on account of. U make it sound like it's only guys that enjoy the feeling of cumming inside their women. Like there aren't times when in the heat of passion the lady cries into your ear "I want U to come deep inside me."

Lets all be responsible and avoid building castles in the air. As chics dey waka about these days sef who know if she been no get belle before she show guy man place?

All of us no dey hear word otherwise we for no dey discuss this thing here sef.

Would you want your girl to push you off when you're about to get to your seventh heaven
I'm not putting blame on anybody what am saying is that you also as a guy have a part to play. if the chic wants you to come inside her and you're not wearing CD then it's her fault

As a guy too knowing the consequences of coming inside even in the heat of passion at least you still have your senses to know the result of coming inside you can perform "coitus interruptus"

9 years It's always important to define a relationship from the beginning to avoid all this misunderstanding

You won't blame her for clinging to the man after 9years You have to separate from him for sometime and let him sort it out with his ex

This type of girls could do anything becos the guys has wasted her time and she's
So let him sort it out before you go on for your own safety. Cheers

Onchedu:
And I guess a broken condom is the guys fault and U being unsafe and letting him come inside is wisdom on your part and foolishness on his?

Most guys will want all the pleasure, do you expect the chic to push the guy off her when he's about to come  
And a broken condom occurs when it's not properly inserted or there's air in it

So if you don't wanna marry your baby's mama, then make sure you wear your condom right and save both of you the stress

@ poster

This is not a dating site

Ujujoan:
I just wish girls will learn how to give ultimatums to protect themselves from this weak argument you are making! If a man refuses to wear a condom, he can withdraw or pour  if he likes, but if he gets a girl pregnant, he's walking her down the aisle! Either that or it's over!      

You got it right there When they come inside, then they have to be man enough to father a child

Onchedu:
Chic, just cos U let a guy stick it doesnt mean he wants U to have his baby or that he want's to marry U. We've had this discussion before and I clearly explained to u how it's easier to get a guy to commit to U without sex than it is to give him sex and expect him to commit to U.
Why do girls generally believe that they are the givers of sex sef? your giving and getting and we give and get so U've paid me and I've paid U and the illicit contract did not include babies or marriage. U should always read the fine print.

Once again I've made a case for the girls by cautioning the guy above not to encourage girls to think a bun in the oven will give the a guarantee to marriage and U make it sound like i'm against your species.

Is it that U are surrounded by guys that insensitive to a woman's predominantly emotionally based reasoning, and therefore think we are all like that?

When you guys put your thing into the hole without a raincoat, what da heck do you expect from a healthy lady, bananas

dude you guys have to take caution too and be man enough and live up to your responsibility ready or not, kabish!