₦airaland Forum

addmole:
I and My wife have been married for 5 years. We are based here in Lagos. She's 35 years old. We are doing very okay and living comfortably. Since we got married, my wife hated sex so much. I am not even trying to sugarcoat this. She doesn't want to hear you talk about it or she does it. There's no one in the family that haven't tried to settle our differences since we got married. She was never like this when we were dating. It's been 1 issue to the other. She doesn't initiate sex, and when she does accept you to have sex, it's missionary style and it's just 1 round. Ah, me wey dey like knack wella. This woman begin change am for me. Lol. She doesn't want to hear you discuss sex.

Anyway sha, lets move on...

5 YEARS ago, her mum came to my house to kneel down and tell me I am stressing her daughter that I should not kill her with sex. Her then-unmarried sister then asked if I ama dog? Ah, insult. Anyway, I don forgive her. I spoke to my wife and told her what is the meaning of this? What kind of lies are you feeding your family with? This is the same person who happens to make just 1 round of sex. Just 1 round. She lies flat on her back. Once you are done, she quickly pushes you away if you stay on top of her for more than 10 to 15 minutes. There were times she would hit me if I try to initiate sex. I reported to her elder brother. He elder brother warned her. She stopped. She moved to kicking me anytime we initiate sex on bed, i reported to my pastor, he spoke to her and then, she stopped. My pastor told me i have to be patient with her. I said OK.

Omo...
The only time we make love is just 1 round, missionary style and that's it. She says she has pain on her stomach. I have been patient for 5 years with her. I told her anytime she's strong enough, we can make out. That there's no problem.

I have been pressured to cheat on her many times. i HAVE BEEN REALLY PRESSURED. Its just not easy. Her family have insulted me for demanding sex from her. Lol. The thing tire me. I see no where i am demanding. We don't do any other position apart from the missionary style. We do not even kiss. This is a woman that doesn't want you to kiss in in anyway. Even sometimes, she shouts at you when you try to be romantic to kiss her unexpectedly just to spies up our love life. She doesn't even want you to cuddle her on bed. She wants to be alone. Make money, attend to her business, vibes, laugh with friends and family and that's it. When it comes to sex, don't go there discussing that with her about making out.

I even had to retort to preparing her mind for sex by sending her a position we would try on WhatsApp, she would leave the message on read and not respond. When you talk to her about what you sent to her, she would just tell you, she's not strong to make love.

ANOTHER PART OF HER:
My wife is a very bitter person full of anger. If you try to tickle her when she's cooking in the kitchen to play with her, she gets angry and warns you not to try such. My wife doesn't want you to play with her. I am not writing all these to make it look I am a victim here. But all these are my experiences. I have to pour it out. I NEED SOME ADVICE.

There were many times, we agreed on separating. But we have already children and we used to think about these because the quarrels and the disrespect, sex and everything is causing a whole lot on us.

We do not have any form of healthy discussion very well. Before you know it, we are quarrelling over the place, she's shouting. There was a time we quarrelled that after throwing a Gotv remote at her, she fainted. She woke up before we got to the hospital. She almost died. I told her, she needs to stop her anger and control herself and enjoy her marriage. She just won't listen. She's an Edo woman.

I have tried many times to leave the marriage because it's affecting my mental health. Sometimes I regret about getting married to her. Sometimes, I just feel, maybe I CAN TRY MORE and give her a chance. When you call her to discuss our sex life, about her anger and bitterness, she doesn't apologise. She hardly apologise. Even when I get to explain her part on why she was wrong, she claims she's right until maybe someone hears us arguing before she would reluctantly apologise.

I have been battling a really starved sex life, full of a woman with bitterness, anger and pride who never apologise. She's quick to advice other women on Facebook, She would video call friends, give them advice and her family how they need to maintain peace with their relationship. But she never seem to give me respect in anyway in her own own. Hmmmm.

Recently, my wife brought out another timetable that she cannot cope making out with me the way she does. Which is 3 times a week. That she can only be available to make love 2 times a week. This 2 times is just 1 round each. This is how she wants it. I immediately responded to her that I feel her pain. I understand. She cannot be pressured just to make it look like she wants to please me that I would rather get a side chic. Yes, i know this was wrong to tell her, but i am frustrated. She disrespects me and starve me of sex and she's even bending the rules again. She responded that 'ok that I am free to do what i LIKE'.

i decided to bring this here to know the comments from people. I would like to get advice from persons who are going through similar things like this and advice me on what to do.

Some of you might say, call her and talk to her. I have done that several times since in the last 5years. I did it last night and twice today. I have spoken to her. She promised she would change, she would not only repeat the same thing but make things worst the next time.

She disrespects me a lot. I have sometimes left the house but come back after families get to call me. She would change for a week and return to her old self.

What do I DO? Please make your responses constructive enough.

Fxxxcking weakling. I hate weak men.. Spits!!

YEMOYEMI:
I am commenting late but I do hope the OP gets to see this. Your story is exactly same as mine. As I was reading your post, I was praying that you should not mention the state she's from so everyone here could believe me when I corroborate you. I was sure she's from Edo State and most likely Benin. Your story is mine story. I know what the problem is but she will not tell you. She believes you're not doing enough as a man. You said you're comfortable but to her that is not enough. If we can get a way to talk to private to share ideas. I know exactly what you're going through. That she doesn't like sex is not true. She's using it to punish you because she feels you're not making her happy. Do more, make more money and try to do more for her and the family. Above all, try to have secret savings for yourself--e get why. May God be with us all.

Nonsense.

TemplarLandry:
Let Atiku and HoeB keep wasting their time and money.

Says a jobless nairaland paid urrrchin. You are always here 24/7 waiting to beat front page . To what end exactly? Get a life man.

Igbo:
This is purely targeted to Ibos

Says who? Nawa for nairaland

obembet:
I still don't know why Don jazzy or Olamide dey no fit sign this man.. we can't allow this talent to waste o.


One thing about Nigerians now I that if this evil man decamp to labour party today, Obidient will tell u why he's 100 times better than Jonathan

Wetin concern labour party and obidient for this matter

He is now a poet?

Tinubu is a criminal and only appoints his fellow criminals

eboniest:
Based in Lagos..I have opened my heart but it got really shattered by someone I hold dear..Am trying to pick my pieces and heal first

So sorry about that. You just have to keep trying. You never can tell

Chelsea 2 westham 1

eboniest:
Wish I have someone who could love me genuinely like this

You can if you open your heart to it. Where are you base?

Dust we came, dust we shall go!! Rest in peace mammi .

do4luv14:
Omo After watching Willy Willy, for night to sleep na War, the fear no be here

Then just threaten any crying Child with Willy Willy and see Magic 😁😁😁😁

E worry I and my siblings then, we no fit sleep for dark room especially if popsy no sleep for our room after watching willy willy

BoldBrainz:
People living in Karimo, Jahi, Deidei, Apo mechanic, should better start making plans on how to vacate those premises. Cause Nigeria's demolition general is relocating to Abuja..😂.

E sure me die say Wike go floor Apo mechanic. And those Igbos who own containers and shops scattered everywhere in Apo mechanic, are going to be the biggest victims. The days ahead are full of tears. I can see it. The tribal hate has just begun.

Imaginative delusions. Stop wishing the impossible from your hut in ogbomosho

Stupid man.

Just see list. Square pegs in round holes

jumper524:
I watched a video where Sanusi stated that we shouldn't vote anybody that tells you it would be easy to rule Nigeria.
These are one of the challenges a president face.

The president is the most held accountable individual in this country.
But then again, there are other people who should be held accountable as much as the president but we tend to turn a blind eye towards.

1, is we ourselves : how often do we pay our tasks, it would be a great sin if you commenting and criticising is yet to renew your expired drivers license but then again criticise Mr president at same time.


2, state governors: I'm surprised more people tend to hold Ganduje that construct multiple state projects and is debt free of salaries responsible and accountable much more than Obaseki and okowa of the PDP who are/were governors of oil rich Niger delta states but yet left the states in a terrible condition coupled with having one of the worst state schools in the country.

3, Senators: Now this arm of govt were quick to approve the president plea to 8k monthly palatives for over 12 million Nigerians.
I did the maths, that's over 110k slots per senator.
These men who are educated knows better than to pass the bill, even those in the jesus christ labour party didn't object to the bill cos they weigh their pocket before their constituents.
Imagine holding over 20k slots of over 110k slot?
That's about 160million monthly, the senator would still be perceived as saints if he disburse the rest 90k.

The president has the lowest to gain of the country fails but then his advisers/ministers and other arms of govt have the highest to benefit if they loot what's good for the economy.
The president has been elected, and instead of being the president enemy and hating for no reason, we should rather be his best friends in guiding him towards the evil sets around him.

Gibberish!!

Holla911:
How could he have repaired the refineries while paying subsidy ?
One had to go for the other. We have no choice but to endure the difficult time while hoping and praying our leaders get it right.
The current hardship is a global pandemic.

Keep supporting bad government cos you benefit you. Has Nigeria ever got it right?

100% fact.

Seun, this thread insults a whole tribe by calling them names and you still allow it get to 9 page? Is this not the tribal slurs you banned?

Let him feed the birds corn.. Foolish agbado urrchin

The drug lord and his Idiots will be doomed .Insha Allah

Ikaeniyan0:
If dem born them well, make dem try am, they will all be killed too

People will die. Is that what you wish from your hideout in ogbomosho?

ivolt:
Coward brainless thugs in uniform.
Kill him and throw the country into civil war.

Says an agbado from ogbomosho

natedroid:
Someone like you deserve to be arrested

I'm Igbo and you're one of the problems of the Igbos

How did you come up wiith that fact that he is Igbo?

Nice2023:
At old age u will suffer alone.

How e take concern you. At old age some people wey marry no dey suffr?

IconicR:
He was just being transparent but trust Nigerians to come for his head because of their natural hatred for successful men and women.

You be mumu..Chai. Nigeria can.never be better..not in this life time

Penguin2:
Lol

They are begging him because without him and Kwankwaso, Tinubu has lost the north.

And when you consider that Tinubu does not have the support of Southeast and Southsouth, you would realize that it practically means the end of the road for Tinubu if there is ever going to be a rerun.

When Tinubu and his Agbado corn eaters were going ballistic against Igbos, they never thought of the consequences it portended. They even said that Southeast had no electoral value all because they believed they had the north.

But look at everything falling like a pack of card before their very eyes in less than 3 months.

I support PO ,but how some of you ever think there will be a rerun for this we naija marvels me.. Should we not just quietly watch and wait for the tribunal outcome? All these talks of re-run aint necessary at this time.

cursedAbiola:
Nigeria had a simple choice to make last election but they repeated the wrong choice.

Inec and zoogeria security personels together with the Apc government of mumu buhari rigged the election in favour of ebola tinubu and apshit