Killz3's Posts
Nairaland Forum › Killz3's Profile › Killz3's Posts
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 ... 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 (of 115 pages)
[color=#000030]Name the Leg A student needed an extra small diversified course to fill the requirements of his graduation. He picked a course on Zoology. Then came a test time. The professor handed out a sheet of paper with only four pairs of legs drawn. He then asked the class to name the four wild birds from their legs. The student kept staring and staring at legs and was getting no where. His agitation and anger grew to a boiling point. Ultimately, he got up rushed to the teacher in the front and smashed the test on the teacher's desk. "How can you give stupid test like this?" He blasted at teacher. The annoyed teacher looked up and said: "You boy, you have flunked the test. What's your name?" The angry student pulled up his pants to the knee baring his legs and yelled: "Look here at my legs, and tell me what is my name." ![]() [/color] |
[color=#000030]Bad Hearing ![]() A man goes to his doctor and says, "I don't think my wife's hearing is as good as it used to be, what should I do?" The doctor replies, "Try this test to find out for sure. When your wife is in the kitchen doing dishes, stand fifteen feet behind her and ask her a question, if she doesn't respond keep moving closer asking the question until she hears you." The man goes home and sees his wife preparing dinner. He stands fifteen feet behind her and says, "What's for dinner, honey?" He gets no response, so he moves to ten feet behind her and asks again. Still no response, so he moves to five feet. Again, no answer. Finally he stands directly behind her and says, "Honey, what's for supper?" She replies, "For the fourth time, I SAID CHICKEN, you deaf idi[i]o[/i]t. [/color] |
[color=#000030]Never before had Sue looked in the box that her husband Fred kept under their bed. The box had been there for the past 20 years of their marriage but she had never invaded his privacy. One day, while cleaning, she decided to take a look in the box. She didn't figure it was anything he was hiding since she could have looked at it any other time but hadn't. In the box she found 3 eggs and 10,000 dollars. This seemed very strange so she went to Fred and asked, 'Why are there 3 eggs in a box under our bed?' He replied, 'Well, every time I was unfaithful to you, I put an egg in the box.' Sue was surprised and hurt that he had been unfaithful but she consoled herself with the fact that they had been married for over 20 years and he had only been unfaithful 3 times. 'But where did the 10 thousand dollars come from?' she asked. 'Every time I got a dozen eggs, I sold it.'[/color] |
[color=#000030]A month overdue ![]() Mr.Sharma comes home one night, and his wife throws her arms around his neck: "I have great news, I 'm a month overdue. I think we are going to have a baby! The doctor gave me a test today, but until we find out for sure, we can't tell anybody." The next day, Mrs. Sharma receives a telephone call from BSES (Bombay Suburban Electricity Supply) because the electricity bill has not been paid. Am I speaking to Mrs. Sharma ? Yes, speaking BSES guy: "You! re a month overdue, you know!" How do YOU know? stammers the young woman. ![]() Well, ma'am, its in our files! says the BSES guy . What are you saying? Its in your files , HOW? Yes, We have a system of finding out who's overdue GOD !!!!!!, this is too much. Madam, I am sorry, I am following orders, I have to inform you, that you are overdue I know that let me talk to my husband about this tonight, he will speak to your company tomorrow That night, she tells her husband about the visit, and he mad as a bull, rushes to BSES office the next day morning. Whats going on? You have it on file that my wife is a month overdue? What business is that of yours? the husband shouts. Just calm down, says the lady at the reception at BSES, its nothing serious. All you have to do is pay us. PAY you? and if I refuse? ![]() Well, in that case, sir, we have no option but to cut yours off. And what would my wife do then? the husband asks. I dont know. I guess, she would have to use a candle!!! [/color] |
Tobailoveu:[color=#000030]Who be dis one again o? You smoke mess? [/color] |
laf i no fit laf[color=#000030]DIES![/color] ![]() |
[color=#000030]So toba is finally getting married. . . ope o[/color] |
freecocoa:[color=#000030]The best answer for unrepentant idiotic bastards is what? Ignore them! They'll never come up with something new. . . Just subscribe to their stupidity and let them entertain! #E kwu si gom! [/color] |
[color=#000030]**Subscribing** [/color] |
[color=#000030]What are you doing with three girlfriends? Now you want to leave town because of girls, so what is your gain?[/color] |
[color=#000030]The fools are gathering as expected! . . . **Subscribing to their idiocy as usual** Let's see if they come up with something new from their dead brains. . . Fcck faces! [/color] |
Dude don't go all personal on me abeg,why are you trying to make this about you and what people claim you to be?I'm just trying to tell you that you at times it pays to be realistic and argue objectively,the way you go about it makes it sound like your point is the only reasonable one that's where I have a problem,if you decide to stay by your wife's sick bed and never work in your life,that would be your problem and not mine.[color=#000030]^^^ Good for you then! I still have my values. . . Keep yours![/color] |
otooro:[color=#000030]Thanks![/color] |
freecocoa:[color=#000030]Where did i claim i'm always right? I dont know how you guys bring up trumped up claims about me, especially if i dont agree with the topic! If your husband will leave you and go sign a contract, fine and good for both of you! I wont do that, and that's me! Money doesnt mean everything to me. Will you also blame me for money meaning everything to you and your husband?. . . I guess not![/color] |
Must you always recycle your layman's English? Why do i keep having this urge to give your Neonatal hypothyroidism infected face, suffering from acute albinism trait, a dirty back hand slap?[color=#000030]Typical reply of an Idi[i]o[/i]t! You have seen that your threads topic and post doesnt make sense, you cant defend the rubbish you posted, then your defense is to face Killz, like all idi[i]o[/i]ts on this forum do! Killz is an albino, killz pix, killz complexion, killz colour! You are a what? A FOOL! What has my color and picture have to do with what we are discussing? Erectile dysfunctional dimwitted motherfuccker! Have you run out of points? You now want to discuss Killz color and his picture, and no longer 20 million Naira, and how you can shoot your mother for 20 million Naira? Besides, what are you doing stalking my profile, and my profile pic? Can you see why you are a fool?[/color] |
killz-If the call doesn't come in of course life goes on,the man is unable to discharge his wife and runs around friends and relatives trying to raise a bit of money.[color=#000030]Good, now we are getting somewhere! You rightly said that if the 20million Naira call doesnt come, life goes on! So, we can both agree that with or without an extra 20 million, life goes on. Therefore, if i decide to fcck the contract, life goes on! How many men has died as a result of running around trying to raise a bit of money? In the end, dont they discharge their wives? In the end, everything turns out well, no?[/color] |
[color=#000030]^^ Non Taken![/color] |
DaShyGuy:[color=#000030]You are a noncomprehending discombobulated nincompoop! You saw a bloody unfathomable joke, and decided to post it without giving careful thoughts and considerations about it! So in your absolute selfishness and stupidity, you stand your wedding, your bride to be, your parents, your inlaws, your friends, guests that came from far and wide, everyone that has ever meant anything to you in your life, down for 20 million Naira, with the common poor man poverty stricken misconception, that they should understand, because 20 million Naira is involved? You are a what? A FOOL! I'm sure also, that if your house is on fire with your wife and kids inside, and someone calls you for a 100 million Naira contract, you'll leave your wife and children inside the burning building, head to abuja and sign the contract abi? Afterall, your unused brand new shiny brain will tell you that you can always re marry, abi? Dumb phock![/color] |
larikky:[color=#000030]Whether they'll be safe or not will come later! Being there is more important. So i am there and a call comes in for a 20 million contract, and you expect me to leave? Because?. . . 2. If your wife is going to have a C- Section, a good doctor would have informed you prior to that time, and you'll have made necessary arrangements. Stop thinking that it's the 20 million that will save you! You are a man, you should have a plan B! In real life, You dont wait for an action to begin before you plan towards it! What if that call doesnt come in? Would you have known? I hate these unfathomable scenarios![/color] |
Van snickers:[color=#000030]Lefu na thief na[/color] |
Nj girl:[color=#000030]Now what was his plan before the C-Section came up? Are you honestly asking me to believe that a grown arsed man, would wheel his wife into an operating theater hoping on dumb luck to provide him money so he can make ends meet? Where tha hell does that happen, except in Nollywood?[/color] |
La Parisienne:[color=#000030]I dont know why people have a hard time to differentiate realistic scenarios, from trumped up inconceivable 4WD bullshit! Nollywood wont even come up with such ballistic reasoning! It's absolute absurdity![/color] |
larikky:[color=#000030]Hellloooo! If my abandoning the fccking contract means that her and my baby are safe, then by all means fcck the contract! Damn! I've witnessed this particular scenario in real life, and 25million was at stake! There are more beautiful things to life than money, and what money could bring![/color] |
DaShyGuy:[color=#000030]You are a fool! Because he is a mod, he should think with his arse just like you are doing? Slap yourself for thinking like a new born baby goat![/color] |
jay bee: |
freecocoa:[color=#000030]Like i said earlier, When it comes to choosing over the one i Love, even 100 million becomes common! But on level grounds, 20 million is not common! When it comes to life and death decisions, i know where my loyalty lies. . . And that's with the one i love. . .[/color] |
[color=#000030]Everyone should get me straight! The OP's wedding scenario is bullshit! I'm not even commenting based on that! i'm commenting based on when Jaybee asked him "What if your wife was having your first child via C-section and the contract offer scenario was on the table? would you still go for money over common sense?" He answered MONEY! And that is why i'm commenting! As for the wedding scenario, count me out of such inconceivable bullshit![/color] |
[color=#000030]Love is feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a friend, for a parent or child, warm fondness or liking for another, that strong or passionate affection for a person of the opposite sex that constitutes the emotional incentive to marrying the person! It's an emotion like fear, anger etc. . .[/color] |
GBAM[color=#000030]Bro, that's because in DREAMLAND, nobody dies! The scenario and responses is typical of what we call "Sweet Dreams!" ![]() And also, people think life is a one way street! They never consider the other angle to matters! Money Money Money! [/color] |
freecocoa:[color=#000030]When it comes to choosing over the one i Love, 100 million becomes common! Have you not heard when someone says "I'll pay ANYTHING, just save her life" Money is not everything. . . Sorry if you dont see life that way![/color] |
larikky:[color=#000030]I live in the real world where "Commonsense" holds sway! I'm yet to see anyone that died as a result of using commonsense![/color] |
[quote author=lady s. link=topic=859269.msg10088265#msg10088265 date=1328009575]i am surprise at what pple post, who say they cant ask you to sign a document on weekends, some bankers goes to work on weekends. There was a girl that wrote NNPC APTITUDE TEST on her wedding day. This is a test that over 5million appilicants, so she is not certain of getting the job but she forfiet her wedding for it. This is a contract worth 20m, o boy i will go and sign it sharp sharp. afterall he is a poor guy so i except pple like him to attend the wedding meaning they will also be late because the will rush down to there bizes b4 coming. Just get the next available flight, can the pple and let they know today is ur day, so they need to make it fast. let ur bestman rush down to a business center and book a flight. Lagos to Abuja is Jus 45mins.[/quote][color=#000030]Bullshit! Things dont work this way except in DREAM LAND! Now, the lady you gave her example, did she travel to abuja, or was it in her state of residence? Shiny brain! I did not see where you wrote about lagos traffic and how to weave it!. . . Scenario is inconceivable, and a bloody waste of time![/color] |
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 ... 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 (of 115 pages)
He blasted at teacher.


ope o