₦airaland Forum

RadicallyBlunt:
When a woman is the one in charge of a home, thats the result. Women naturally don't give things for free, when they give even as a girlfriend, they'll demand your worship. I lived with a family too due to financial challenges my parents went thru. They reaped me off my self esteem. The woman and her 1st daughter were the ones in charge as their dad is on transfer and only comes home 1ce in a while. They just dominated everything negatively and yet claim to see visions in prayers.

I don't advice any parent to put their children with ppl to look after..the humiliation is too much. Women are not kindhearted even to fellow women like themselves let alone to someone else's child especially if the child is more intelligent than theirs. No matter how christianlike a woman is there's evil deep down her core heart

This has to go down as one of the most bluntly expressed truth I've read in nairaland. It goes with a share, a JPEG and permanent memorisation.

Creamish:
...just goes to show y'all that men also cry when they are single and getting older.. They get depressed too.. aaaww..men are human afterall..

We're all human; everyone wants to live and die in company.

SirShymexx:
Being 32 as a guy isn't that old. For most guys, life starts at 30, hence there's a luxury and window of opportunity to make mistakes and live the life during ya 20s. Don't watch others and focus on yourself. At 32 - most of the most powerful and richest guys in the world today, were still trying to figure out what they wanted to do with their lives.

Relationship/companionship is grossly overrated, especially if you're in it for the sake of it. The most sacred and important thing in life is peace. And if you can't get the same peace you get by being alone from companionship/relationship - there's no point being in one.

Words of wisdom!

obowunmi:
OP should find someone in his class, no need for epistles.

I know a woman who married a jobless man at age 38. She did it for the Nigerian society, just to say she's married.

She's the most bitter woman I know. The man can't even buy boxers and singlet for himself.

The role of a woman is not to be a man's nanny or parent. He must be able to take care of himself, with or without a woman. That's a real man.

This jobless man sees his wife as a meal ticket and not a wife. He stays home from morning to night watching football. Then he goes to church when he's bored. When the woman comes back from work, no to cook and clean. She's so frustrated. It's like she's taking care of a baby and calling him husband.

Lazy MEN.

No man should debase his manhood in such fashion, a man should be financially ready to take care of himself and his family before setting sail on the rough tides of marriage.

However a working wife should come in when necessary, there shouldn't be a fast rule on this.

Even if the husband were Dangote, If the wife loves him, she will always look for little ways to make financial input to their empire.

obowunmi:
Lazy men like the OP.

Instead of worrying about being sself-sufficient he's fighting over a woman's money.

The OP's case is slightly complicated.

First it's a relationship match-made. Who does that these days?

So there's no love hovering around them. If the OP's fiancée loved him, she wouldn't mind helping out financially if the need arose.

Evidently the finacee is having doubts if OP isn't marrying her for her wealth. Most wealthy women are wont to suspecting men's motives in relationships especially if they be below average in looks.

My opinion is if the wife works, she should share the financial burden at most 20% WITHOUT THE HUSBSAD DEMANDING.

After all, a working wife will sacrifice some amount of home care for office hours.

mzvyne:
I understand you.... And totally agree with you.
The
problem I have is that most guys want to marry a super woman who supports them in every possible aspect (financially, spiritually and otherwise), that they won't support in doing her own responsibilities.

It is a worrying trend nowadays!!!

The 21st century male has been effeminately indoctrinated.

Have you not noticed the increasing number of men who ponder more on their looks, clothes, cosmetics and personal ornamentation than they worry about skill acquisition or developing a sound world-view or providing responsible leadership?


The economic success of women has cast a shadow of blurred reality and expectation for many men.

mzvyne:
I once asked if husbands should help the wife with her responsibilities around the house, the reply I got was.. I shouldnta expect him to, but should be grateful if he does..

I'm giving OP the same response.. You shouldn't expect her to help with your financial responsibilities, but if she does, be grateful.

A man's first and primary responsibility is to provide for his family. This is instinctively ingrained in every man!

A woman's natural disposition is to nurture and groom the home.

I see no qualms preparing bread toast and tea for my wife when she's a little ill or having a lazy morning in bed. Or when she's having pregnancy associated weakness. And on weekends, I'll love her to watch me cook a tomato sauce.

Similarly, it'll be a small relief if she does a little domestic expenses that skipped my mind like power bills or paying for a fixed electronics or the like.

There's no absolutism in spousal responsibilities.

Fanirandele:
So much immaturity here , what happened to people debating like intellectuals Those talking about the Submission, based in that principle o other woman is "under" you except the one you married so let that ideaolgy stay in the home and each couple should do what works best for them depending on their beliefs .

I didn't see anywhere in this thread where any poster opined expressly that all women are under all men!!! women are under their husbands no matter her educational qualification, and on the broader society, every man has a responsibility for every woman within his immediate environment in courtesy, respect, protection and security.

Fanirandele:
In the larger society all humans are equals and must have equal rights.

I don't know of any law in Nigeria that denies women any rights. Do you? Please stop this shallow accusation.

Fanirandele:
The only men who are intimidated by women having equality in society are men who have nothing going for them except a penis. A real man (or woman's) focus should be about earning respect and people elevating you based on your achievements and not because you were born with a penis.

Men aren't scared of successful women, we find the majority of them incompatible. There's a difference. Statistics shows that women with high financial independence are more likely to walk out of marriage than women with average income. Statistics have also shown that successful women are twice unhappy with depression than with everyday women. Men don't want that. Successful women are not complementary; they are pseudo captains who engage in the rat race and dirty office politics and wear out their beauty and joy and sweetness away faster than the new Ferrari can hit 0-60 mpH. We don't want that

Fanirandele:
Dangote is not respected because he's a man and neither is Oprah respected just because she's a woman .

If dangote were a woman, he will have to employ enough PR and bullying and yelling to get half the respect he has now. If opera were a male she would be as influential as was Larry king.

Fanirandele:
Your achievements are what will make you revered in society and not your sex.

Women and authority will never sit well together. Can a lady command a battalion to war ? When my manager used to have menstrual cramps and delegate her work to me, I knew man was trying to outsmart nature.

Fanirandele:
If a woman is better than you in your field, class e.t.c then in that respect She is superior to you and that is a fact. If your boss is a woman she's your superior and there is nothing you can do about it. Save all that women should submit to men for your marriage, no other woman owes you submission .

Crap load of incoherence! Since when does superiority in discipline alter the scheme of life. And who wants submission from a woman that isn't my wife ? Stop flying on the wings of false accusations, dear.

Fanirandele:
If a couple decides equality within their marriage is what works for them then good for them. Live and let live, if you like traditional women go ahead and marry one and leave the men who like modern strong women like myself to marry the feminists. I don't see anyone forcing you to marry a feminist afterall

Any man can marry who he damn please, after all, we are seeing a trend where lazy packaged boys are going for hardworking females these days and sucking their nectar oh it's the fad now. The higher a lady goes economically, her natural maternal instincts is preyed on my jobless, sweet-tongued guys. But we owe it to posterity to say what feminism truely is. It's an enemy of mankind, especially women themselves. It fights against their very nature. Check, my threads, and look for the thread I entitled "why the modern woman is sad" it was a well researched topic from real people and real events.

Fanirandele:
By the way it's funny that someof the people that are supporters of men committing adultery are always the first to talk about what the Bible says when it comes to submission I don't see the Bible supporting adultery for any of the sexes. It just shows you how people pick what suits them and the hypocrisy of Africans especially.

Adultery is a different matter entirely. Africans are the real deal. Your white overloads are endorsing bestiality, homosexuality and animal rights when over 2 billion people are starving while they still keep mistresses. But let me not derail.

You're an African, and you shouldn't give a good goddamn about feminism, its actual purpose will swallow you whole and choke you away into the chasm of its enormity.

Creamish:
Oya take
- Monday
- Tuesday
- Wednesday
- Thursday
- Friday
- Saturday
- Sunday

...one for each day of the week.

Ok, take your own,

delishpot:
Is this what you experienced or what you were thought to believe? Many women beg to differ. As usual, you are telling me what you have been conditioned to believe. Many men believe they know the ways and life of women more than women themselves.
All you stated goes to prove what I said. Because women have been subjected to a certain expectation and character for centuries, it is only normal that they act and behave instinctively how the society expects them to behave. For to do otherwise, would reduce their chances for survival and reproduction which is the main force guiding every living thing.
Lock up kids male and female and tell them they are designed to serve and make a certain group of people happy. Deny those kids every right and make sure they have no say in the midst of their masters. Keep this going since the creation of Adam and never change the rule. Then watch and see if generations, after generations from those kids will not be wired to act according to the conditioning of their ancestors. Does that mean they were created to be that way by God?

You are gradually making assertions you can't substantiate. Not only are women conditioned to behave in a certain manner, but also you're claiming that men too are preconditioned to behave in a certain way

You are unwittingly denying the difference between men and women then. If there are no sexual differences between men and women, as you claimed, then there are basically no differences between the sexes. You are denying basic science just to give credence to your feminist theories. Women preconditioning to certain deportment is the clever excuses by feminists who seek to revolutionise society and deceive gullible people.


I've never been given satisfying answers to this poser by folks who hide under the precondition excuse to advocate similar behaviour for both male and female, so I'll hope you would do a better job:

You said women are preconditioned for millions of years by men to behave in a certain way or suppress their sexual behaviours and I want to ask you; How is it possible for women to be suprresed in all societies of the world, from Africa, to the India, to the Orient and middle East, to Europe and the new world?

These are societies that at a point in history never met or crossed! So women were coincidentally oppressed too in all cultures across the world for millions of years, across all civilisations? Keep denying nature.

With all the varying and different cultures of humanity, races, people, beliefs and customs, they all found something in common to surprress women to not express their sexual orientation? That's why your theory can't survive the fire.

You, my friend have been programmed to beleive a carelessly woven antics of a few feminists whose motive for humanity you cannot begin to comprehend in its enormity.

delishpot:
What you call evidence is the result of centuries of brain washing and mind control. Yes women need love but news flash! So do men. My point was, if you remove the stigma that says any woman that sleeps with a man that is not her husband is a LovePeddler and condition girl children that they are being natural and adventurous by sleeping with any man that catches their fancy. Believe me, they will lose that feeling of being cheap, dirty and loose. Their

If I brought up a child to be a thief, he will grow up having no inhibitions to stealing, quit this repetition of unsubstantiated points. Women who lost their parts from the unset will lose their ability for bonding with her man and consequently will find it difficult marrying love and sexual loyalty together. If I flunk my SSCE completely and employed my father's influence to get into the university, I can never remedy my lack of basic educational structure. It is so with women who lost their track , There are so many scientific journals which has proved the male and female brain perceive and assimilate sexual information similarly but also with marked difference.

delishpot:
concience will not let them cringe when they sleep with a fellow they are not married to. They have been conditioned to act that way. Its like a man conditioned to not cheating in marriage or not killing any living thing. When he does any of the above he becomes uncomfortable.

Just like children are conditioned by parents to behave a certain way so that they can have control over the family. Children were not wired that way. They were not born obidient or disobedient they were wired to be that way by their parents and the society at large.

I love this comparison with women and children. It still holds true to this day. But children show sign of dependency to their parents, by copying and mimicking them. Children starts bonding with their mothers from their foetal stages. It is nature. You know not what you say.

delishpot:
And even though they want to do otherwise, their trained instinct makes them remember how they are supposed to and expected to behave and act as kids. This conditioning keeps them in check even when mom and dad are not there.

You still could not tell me why women never forget their deflowerers. Were they also trained to remember them?

Or did society create women with hymen to be broken and circumsised. THE UNBLEMISHED WOMAN WHO LOVES HER MAN WILL STILL REMAIN SEXUALLY LOYAL. THIS IS HER NATURE, NOT CONDITIONING.

Tell me, if a woman were to overpower me and rapes me, I won't be scared in a marked way, but even if you rape a woman in closed doors, she'll feel a sense of shocking violation and self-loath.

Yes, society preconditioned that too

Sex for men and women will always be different, your philosophy won't change it.

firstEVA:
what going on here? I can't sleep

Sleeping in bits again?

Was missing you then, and I'm not so sure anymore.

postmann:
I can't and won't ape you.
We have our similarities
but yet our differences are wider than our similarities.

You know this is exactly what I'll say in similar situation.

Postmann, I'm thinking of someone or maybe this booze is making me hallucinatory.

Summon firsteva to me, let her stir me back to the warmth of sanity.

FTBOY:
Jesu Kristi!!! another le.zz discovered! postman is dope!

Don't mind that nigger, he goes through life aping me.

Moana:
I'm sorry I want to spend the rest of my night watching TV. I'm not going to spend it making myself just as petty and frustrated as you are. i'm too happy with my life to be wasting my time e-fighting with you.

Oh, leave the cheap talk, you've been e-fighting for hours, matter of fact, I came to this thread and met you knuckles bared

Now I show you a flash of love, you talk about TV

So what are you watching? Is that sofa big enough?

Don't bother about running, I don't chase women.

They come to me; you'll come to me.

Behind your aggressiveness is a masked tenderness I decipher.

And I want to turn it into something beautiful like your eyes; wide and searching.

I bet your voice is as soft as a pigeon's. A VN will always prove me wrong of course.

postmann:
Even for a randy man like you, she falls way below what you would consider a passing beauty.

Randy isn't a fitting adjective for a lover like me.

I will pass my final verdict when I see her body configuration. There's no behavioural inadequacy a good loving won't remedy

postmann:
Did you take time to read the thread? You would see how a woman who never knew what the modern feminist movement was all about retraced her steps as she received the light of truth coming from this post. Thanks to my post, she now knows better.

What else betters saving a soul from deceit and misconception?
How else could one have a better weekend?

While it is obvious you can read and write, your intellectual capacity falls in the range of some mad women who squeeze their husbands by the neck collar while demanding for extra money in a most unfeminine manner.

Savage brute.

Easy with her, most ladies on here aren't as tough as they seem. And you don't want to flood her pillows for the weekend now!!!

Moana:
its actually pathetic that you have resorted to insults simply because you realised you have were arguing over something you have no knowledge about

Your face is hidden and 65 "likes" for a lady isn't a good score by NL standards.But I didn't check your time of debut.

Listen, most young ladies wave the feminist banner as a sign of social sophistication, is all.

Stop your mental exertions over what you have no control over and focus on things whose reaction are within your grasp, for example the rise and fall of my phallus

Moana:
its actually pathetic that you have resorted to insults simply because you realised you have were arguing over something you have no knowledge of

Insults Calling postman a fool was a complement, right? You haven't fired a shot yet at my submissions.

I want to take you fact for fact, hopefully insult for insult, but I'm recently disposed to bedding argumentative ladies than word-fight with them.

I'll go take a swipe at your DP and see if my demons will be awakened!

Moana:
shifting the goal posts isn't helping you. Next time just stick to things you actually know

Ad hominem taken to a new height.

Where was the post shifted to ? Wench, I'm debunking your assertion of feminism of 1912.

Tell me about telemundo, your attempts at advanced discourse is like a baboon attempting to master table manners!!!

Moana:
fools will always be fools! Feminism dates back to 1912. Was WWII before 1912? Was UNICEF established before 1912?
Like I said your are completely ignorant, you do not even know the history of feminism, yet you want to argue on it.please get off the thread and stop embarrassing yourself any further.

Coincidentally, 1912 was when Titanic sank!!! You know that movie was a true life depiction. Rose was still being forced to marry who she doesn't want. That was almighty Britain, the forerunner of liberties. So much for your feminism. Ask Google when did women attain franchise in that country.

You snored away during your history class. Your cheap feminism rants is just the shortest route to fake sophistication and elegance unknown to your breeding.

Go back to playing ludo and use your tomato proceed for cheap history books.

We know delusional and disillusioned Beldame like you like pouring out your frustrations on men online, but we aren't responsible for your lack of male figure in your life.

Keep your agony to yourself and spare us your malignancy.

Life is hard enough without your tears of frustration sweeping us away in a wave of delusion.

Moana:
I usually prefer ignoring fools but the world would continue to have more of them if we do not make it our duty to educate them.

Your definition of fool leaves you looking and acting like one

Moana:
If it weren't for feminism women would not be able to hold offices that were previously reserved for men!

You're an event-thief!!! That's actually owing to world war 2 when millions of men where conscripted and many more died. Women actually started filling up the slots since then.

Moana:
If it weren't for feminism child marriages would continue to be to treated as a common harmless practice.

Give the credit to UNICEF!!! 2005, I personally attended a workshop organised and sponsored by UNICEF at hotel Concorde, Owerri, where so many southern states of Nigeria were acclaimed to have signed that declaration. I was the personal guest of Barrister Taiwo Akinlami. Facebook-search that now and Shush!!!

Moana:
If it were for feminism grown women would continue to be classified and treated as minors. If it weren't for feminism wives would continue to be raped by their husbands and it would not be regarded a crime.

You copied and pasted paragraphs of something you know nothing of. If your want to continue displaying your ignorance, by all means do. I will never lose sleep over it.

The rest of your post are excessive emotional responses that bear little correlation to the substance of the issue under discourse.

Patch your leaking emotions and try again.

postmann:
If I don't know you too well, I'd miss the sarcasm. European spot indeed.
Why not spell it out that it's the Europa league you're talking about.

Tika-taka ticks away gradually as Messi prepares to sun his boots in the not too distant future.

Then you laugh all you want.

Anytime the sun choses to set away from camp nou, Barca goes down as the greatest club of the century, Messi the greatest player known since the age of television

@ postmann , I posit Chelsea finishing at a European position this season will be received with relish given the unprecedented turnouts this season.




*****derailment is intentional*******