₦airaland Forum

1. Will you like to drive traffic to your website?

2. Are you looking for a no cost and time saving way of marketing your blog/website?

3. If I showed you a way to achieve 1 and 2 above, will you try it?

I'd like to introduce to you www.trendit.ng

trendit.ng is a Nigerian social news website where users post links to new stories, articles and blog posts - and also vote to promote stories to the front page.

Benefits of www.trendit.ng include

- backlinks to your blogs, news website etc

- increase in traffic to your website

Visit www.trendit.ng today and if you like it please spread the word.

Ask and ye shall be given!

If she is asking for the "Koko" then give am the "koko".

African leaders gathered in India in a summit to further improve India-Africa relationship.

One of the highlights of the summit caught on camera is the moment the 91-year-old president of Zimbabwe, Robert Mugabe loses his balance and nearly falls on stage but for the quick intervention of the Indian prime minister.

The question is, “must he hold on to power by force when it is obvious that he is no longer physically fit to rule his nation”?


Watch the video at http://loonivarsity.com/?p=1405

If you say you are unhappy in Dubai, the police may call to ask you why as part of a new survey.

The online poll, unveiled in recent days, comes as Dubai tries to break into the top 10 rankings of world's happiest cities by 2021, an effort in league with other lofty aspirations in this emirate, home to the world's tallest building.

The simple survey has users choose between a frown, a smile and an unimpressed straight line. The police say they will call those who say they are unhappy.

The effort to measure happiness can be seen in government offices across Dubai, one of seven of the United Arab Emirates. Small tablet computers placed next to civil servants allow citizens to provide instant feedback on their experience. Last year, authorities also began ranking municipal offices with a two-to-seven star system based on their customer service, part of Dubai's "smart government" push.

That happiness effort has included the Dubai police, most well-known abroad for some of the luxury cars employed in its fleet. Twitter messages from the police often include the hashtag "Your Security Our Happiness" in both Arabic and English.

At a recent electronics show, the Dubai police unveiled its happiness survey, saying it began Wednesday. It sent text messages to a number of Dubai residents including a link to a webpage showing a picture of Dubai's ruler, Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum, with the Burj Khalifa tower behind him. It asked one question in English and Arabic: "Are you happy in Dubai?"

In a statement, police said the survey received more than 200,000 responses in its first day, with 84 percent saying they were happy, 6 percent neutral and 10 percent unhappy. Police did not disclose how many text messages they sent.

But that wasn't all. Maj. Gen. Khamis Mattar Al Mazeina, Dubai's police chief, told local media that his officers would randomly call a selection of those unhappy to ask what was upsetting them.

"If the matter is under our jurisdiction, we will help them with it, but if it has to do with another government entity we will forward the issue to the concerned department," he said. He stressed police could not help with personal issues.

The United Arab Emirates is ranked No. 20 out of 158 countries surveyed in the United Nations' 2015 World Happiness Report. Though coming in first in the Arab world, the United Arab Emirates hopes to break into the top 10 by 2021, which will mark the 50th anniversary of the nation's founding.

Source: http://loonivarsity.com/if-you-say-you-are-unhappy-in-dubai/

The judiciary in Ghana is currently engulfed in bribery and corruption scandal. It is the biggest scandal in the history of Ghana’s judiciary according to reports.

A total of 34 judges and magistrates have been accused after a two-year investigation by a local journalist.

Investigative journalist Anas Aremeyaw Anas says he has nearly 500 hours of video evidence on tape, which had been handed over to the chief justice.

Transcript of one of the evidence on tape that involved a high court judge that took 2000 dollars, snails, yams, goats and gave in to a massage from the niece of a ‘murderer’ to free him is reproduced below;

*Start of Transcript*

The Scene:

Chambers of His Lordship Mr. Justice James Julor, Justice of the High Court of Ghana.

An expensive aquarium hums in the background as the goldfish dance in their little world. Mozart plays softly from a CD. An expensive Persian rug occupies pride of place in the air-conditioned chambers, which is dominated by His Lordship’s solid, highly-polished oak desk.

His Lordship is relaxed in his swivel chair, with two men seated across the desk facing him.

His Lordship (HL): Ah, Counsel? You said you wanted to discuss something?

Counsel: Yes my Lord. It is this small armed robbery matter that my client has been accused of and which is before you. This is my client’s brother (he gestures towards the man seated next to him) who has just flown in from the United States, where he deals in oil. He is Mr. Ameyaw.

HL: (licking his lips) I hope it is not Frytol cooking oil we are talking about here…

(All laugh together)

C: No, my Lord. I am talking real oil. The black gold.

HL: Aha. Proceed, Counsel.

C: Much obliged My Lord. Well, for ease of reference, I have summarised the facts of the case, including the reference numbers et al, for your kind attention. You may wish to peruse this (hands over a single sheet of paper to the judge. He takes it leans forward and reads it).

HL: Hmm… Did you say small robbery matter? You really do have a sense of humour, Counsel. This is quite a serious matter. Armed robbery, three counts of kidnap and three of rape. All in one night. Your client has got quite some libido. And the evidence is damning. I remember the case clearly. Judgment day is coming up soon. As a matter of fact I am about to start writing my judgment.

Now what may I do for you? (He leans back in his chair and at them from the top of his rimless eyeglasses)

C: My Lord, my client’s brother is in great distress over this matter and upset that his only brother is likely to head for jail for a very long time indeed. He seeks your help and is most anxious to assist in any way possible.

HL: I am not sure where you are getting with this.

C: My Lord, let us digress for now. My client bought you some amazing waakye from Auntie Munie’s joint. Perhaps we may all enjoy an early lunch together and talk like brothers.

HL (His eyes lighting up): Auntie Munie? Wow? Amazing! She is my favourite!!! (Picks up the phone, barks orders into it and in less than a minute, his secretary appears with plates and forks at his desk. Lunch is soon underway)

C: My Lord, as I was saying…

HL (tearing into a succulent piece of ‘wele’): Yes yes, you want me to acquit your criminal client, right? Sure. What’s the deal? What are you offering? (belches softly and takes a sip of Coke)

C: My Lord, Two Thousand Dollars.

Judge’s eyes narrow and hardens, he stops chewing his wele, and sits back in his chair.

HL: Get out.

C: My Lord…

HL: Don’t My Lord me!! You look at a judge of my stature and experience, look at the enormity of the crimes your client is charged with and you have the temerity to insult me with that measly offer? Do you have any idea what Asomesi took to throw the Woyome case? Do you have any idea what I took last month to throw a land dispute case? I said get out!!

C: My Lord, my client is terribly sorry. We did not mean to insult your integrity or dignity.

HL: Talk some sense to me and make me an offer I cannot refuse or your client will go in for 250 years with hard labour. Try me and see.

C: My Lord, may we confer?

HL: Whatever. I shall resume my waakye. Come back in 5 minutes and make me a happy man, or else…

The two men step out and confer hurriedly. They are ushered back in five minutes later just as His Lordship is licking the remnants of the meal off his fork.

C: My Lord, after a brief conference, my client’s brother has revised his offer. There are difficulties in the oil market at present with the low oil prices. With respect, he wishes to maintain the 2 thousand dollars, but respectfully requests that he tops it up with two goats, five tubers of yam, snails, some mushrooms, a bag of top grade ayigbe gari and a bottle of fine Glenlivet whiskey. We trust that this is acceptable to your Lordship.

HL: Now, let’s see. Did you say goats? C: Yes M’lord.

HL: Dead or living?

C: Erm…living M’Lord

HL: OK. Because as you know I am no dead goat, unlike Ogyam. And I don’t eat yam so drop the yam and replace that with a bunch of plantains.

C: Yes, M’Lord

HL: And I prefer fresh snails, not the dried ones. They give me diarrhoea.

C: Yes M’Lord. My client is most obliged.

HL: And have the items delivered to my home at midnight on Monday. I don’t want nosey neighbours making assumptions that I am corrupt and that I am taking bribes in the form of food.

C: Of course.

HL: So is the money ready?

C: Indeed it is

(Hands an envelope to His Lordship, who takes it and counts the green dollar notes meticulously, and then grins as he shoves them into his breast pocket beneath his judicial gown)

HL: Judgment is in ten days. I expect the commodities before then, else the money you have given to me will only reduce his sentence to one hundred and fifty years. But one thing. I want the prisoner out of this country within 24 hours of his release. I don’t want him committing another set of crimes and social media noisemakers tracing it back to me. I am going to find some technicalities in the books to acquit him. The state will have a fit but I don’t care. There is a reason state prosecutors are poor and I am not.

C: M’Lord, that will be no problem. My client here wants to say something to you.

(Judge nods)

Client: My Lord, I am very grateful for your help. You look like a very nice man and I just want you to know that I have a very beautiful niece here in Accra who is available at your beck and call should you need any services whatsoever. She can run errands, do photocopies and all for you absolutely free of charge in appreciation of what you have agreed to do for us. In fact even if after a hard day’s sitting and delivering your excellent judgments you need to lie down on your Persian rug she will be on hand to give you an amazing massage you will never forget. This I promise you. You are a truly just man.

HL: Now that is an interesting offer, Mr. Ameyaw. You know what, for this wonderful offer, which I wholly accept, I will throw this into my judgment. In acquitting your brother, I will order the state to pay him costs for wrongful incarceration of a thoroughly innocent man, on condition that your niece reports to my chambers in three days at 9am. How is that?

MA: (Beaming) God bless you, My Lord. She will be here.

C: M’Lord. Thank you for granting us audience. We trust you to deliver justice for my client on Judgment Day.

HL: You paa. What justice? I will deliver a judgment on Judgment Day. That is my job. C: Very Well My Lord. Have a nice day.

HL: And you, Counsel. Nice doing business with you, Mr. Ameyaw.

Both men rise and make for the door.

HL: Hold on, Mr. Ameyaw. I hope you are not that funny, faceless Anas Ameyaw guy who snoops on people. The name just clicked.

MA: Hahaha, my Lord paa! Which Ameyaw? I don’t live here so what you are saying is all Greek to me. I am sure you appreciate Ameyaw is a common Ghanaian name.

HL: Of course. Enjoy your flight back to Obamaland.

They wave at judge and exit chambers.

Outside the judge’s chambers, Counsel and Mr. Ameyaw shake hands and part company.

Safely in his car, Mr. Ameyaw pulls out the innocent looking pen in his breast pocket, smiles at the green light in its midsection indicating that video recording is still in progress, pulls out a bottle of 1931 from a small ice chest in the back sea, kisses the pen, holds it aloft and mutters;

*End*


Source: http://loonivarsity.com/?p=451

2 questions -

1. Did she kill her husband?
2. Was she waiting for her husband to die?

Why is pastor wearing glasses? Nobody wore glasses in the bible!

While GMB is holding town hall meeting in Nigeria, GEJ is holding meeting in London.

Most people will agree that first dates can be awkward and uncomfortable. You want to do what you can to make things go a little more smoothly for both parties. If you've asked a woman out and are looking for ways to have a good first date, this article outlines four tips you can use.


1. Go somewhere comfortable

Sometimes people want to go above and beyond on a first date in order to impress. Going to a fancy restaurant is nice, but it may not be comfortable for both parties. Choose a first date that doesn't require either of you to step too far out of your comfort zone. If you're going out for a meal, choose a place that isn't fancy, but still requires you to wear something nice. If you have a place you enjoy eating and think your date might also like it, suggest it. By knowing the place you're going to, you can offer suggestions to your date if she is unsure what to get. First dates can be awkward, so it's important to stay inside your comfort zone to make things a little bit easier. You may also decide to opt for a date that doesn't require a lot of eating because people can become very self-conscious when eating with someone new.


2. Let the conversation flow naturally

You might have a list of questions that you want to ask your date, but don't ask them as if you are doing an interview. Just one question may lead to a great conversation, so hold onto the others for another time. If conversation begins lagging, feel free to ask another one. Never attempt to force conversation. Allow for little breaks in the conversation as well. Every second doesn't have to be filled with talking. It's good to be prepared with a few conversational topics, but don't feel like you need to get through them all in one night.


3. Be a gentleman

You don't have to force yourself to do things you wouldn't normally do. Pulling out a chair for a woman is nice but not required. Opening doors, on the other hand, never goes out of style. Remember your manners at all times. If you tend to swear a lot, control yourself a little more during the first date. You shouldn't change who you are completely, but you want to put your best foot forward. Being a gentleman doesn't only apply to how you treat your date. It's also important to be kind and respectful to servers and people around you in general.


4. Keep the date short

Don't plan for a date that lasts for hours. A first date should be kept somewhat short even if it's going well. Having a meal or taking in an event together is a great first date because you have time to talk, but it's not so long that either of you becomes antsy. It's also good to plan short in the event that it doesn't go well. Keep the date location close to where you both live. If you live a distance apart, plan something where you can meet in the middle.


If you follow the above tips, you can be sure you'll impress your date. By avoiding any pressure of making the first date the most memorable, expensive, or fanciest date ever, you can both enjoy yourselves much more. And who knows, you may have made just enough impression to deserve a second date.



Source: http://ibeere.com/t/4-first-date-tips-for-men/48

Seun, why can't you give us, the people the power to decide what makes the front page? Give us something like a voting system to push a topic to the front page or remove it from the front page. Reddit and Diggs do it.

NLers, am I making sense or not?

Annie will become 2mama and the kids...? *scratching my head*.. 2pikins I guess

Lol

You are yet to start out on a vision or an idea and you are thinking of dropping out of school? You failure in life will not get part 2.

If you don't have an idea that can the world, please I take your mama head beg you, STAY IN SCHOOL!!!

All these billionaires dropped out of school because they would rather spend their times pursuing their dreams than being in class. If you don't have a workable idea and you dropout peren...OYO is ur case o!

Previous post - What Are You Good At is at https://www.nairaland.com/1581802/how-setup-online-business-2014#20697008

Define Your Business

In general the internet facilitate business in the following ways;

1. Supporting an existing bricks-and-mortar business

Any business that doesn't have a supporting website is missing a trick. A well-designed site establishes credibility with your customers and tells them how to get in touch with you.

2. Selling physical goods

Many businesses depend entirely on the internet. Majority of ecommerce is now conducted through companies who have no physical shop front. Imagine how much it will cost you to set up a physical shop. ecommerce technologies have helped cut down the cost of setting up stores for online retailers. There are technologies that can help with stock management, product display and payment processing at a low price.

The choice is yours to choose between having these technologies built into a website or employing services like eBay shops or Amazon Marketplace to sell you products. With the right software, you are a step closer to making your business a success.

Remember: Having the right software with an efficient sales process is not enough. If the product isn't right, the best shop in the world won't succeed!!!

3. Selling services

You might also use the internet to sell your own internet-related skills. For example, if you're a web designer or web developer, you should have a website!!! Your personal website is the first proof of what you can do and what you have done.

4. Selling downloads

Selling downloads is a business built around, ''making money by selling tiny quantities of thousands of items''. Selling of music files, games, ebooks and so on fall into this category. The most exciting thing about this category is that you do not to send any physical goods by courier.

5. Selling online services

There is a huge market for online services. If you find a web application online that can drastically reduce the time and effort you put into completing a task, won't you pay to use it? So start thinking in the line of 'what web application can I develop that can make life easier for people'

6. Selling information

Enroll in almost any internet marketing guru's training course, and one method of making money will be pushed more than any other: INFORMATION PRODUCTS in the forms of PDFs, eBooks, seminars MP3, and video. They can be very quick to get into place, and they can be naturally slotted into Google's search engine so that you know the people visiting your site are actually looking for the information you want to sell.

Having said that, information products have their problems. The most fundamental of these is that web users increasingly expect information to be free. To charge for a product, you need to convince potential customers you can offer information that's not freely available elsewhere and that you are an expert in the relevant field.

However, if you have specialist knowledge that you believe others will pay for then an information business can be easy to set up and highly profitable.

Exercise

Ask yourself the question, 'what category does my business fall into?' Knowing the answer to that will give you clarity about what you want to build and help develop a plan.

akorson5: hello to you all, can blogging about news , sport etc work?

It can work if you are ready to work hard and be patient.

By working hard, this include updating your blog and marketing it.

The first question you need to ask yourself is, 'is there an audience for what I want to do?'

NairaLand is a great place to share and learn. Just like How To Setup an Online Business in 2014 at https://www.nairaland.com/1581802/how-setup-online-business-2014

Previous post on how to setup an online business in 2014 at https://www.nairaland.com/1580736/how-setup-online-business-2014

What Are You Good At?

The question, 'what business should I do online' seems to be a common one. My best answer to that is, 'IT IS IN YOU'. Which means that the best ideas that you can generate are found in what skills, passion and interests that you already have.

You owe it to yourself and your customers to build your business around your skills and interests. By working out what these are, you can both eliminate ideas that fall outside that list and use it as a springboard for generating ideas.

The best formula for failure is 'to start a business around something you do not have interest in or knowledge of'

Skills Every Business Owner Needs

According to Michael Gerber, author of the E-Myth series, businesses are built on three roles. In the case of a small business like yours these three roles might be fulfilled by a single person.

1. The entrepreneur - he/she is the idea generator. An entrepreneur needs to be creative, innovative and on the lookout for opportunities at all times.

2. The manager - he/she is the organizer. The manager needs administrative, organisational, marketing and communication skills.

3. The technician - he/she is the executioner. The entrepreneur thinks up the idea; the manager sets objectives and put resources in place to achieve the objectives; the technician builds the product.

All these roles work hand-in-hand and like I said, it might be fulfilled by just one person. These are the roles I am currently fulfilling in running my website, www.see-my-life.com . For your business to be successful, you need a right balance of these three roles.

Action Steps to Take Away

1. List your current skills and interests
2. Which of the skills within the above roles do you have at present
3. Which are you prepared to learn
4. Which do you have no interest in

TIP: Some of the best online businesses are partnerships between individuals with different skill sets.


Next post - Define Your Business is at https://www.nairaland.com/1584674/how-setup-online-business-2014#20742632

carik: See brother...
I know what I mean by daddy...
Yes you can be
I'm an undergraduate in an institution and I'm a little bit familiar with some ways of making few bucks online but i don't have a close pal to disclose that with.
Unfortunately the only friend I have that is into online biz(PayPal stuff) refused to let me in.
Il just be happy if i can get a close contact with someone on here to discuss and solve problems together.

I stupidly paid for one fiverr jackpot system stuff by lakefist here on nairaland (search lakefist) of which the stuff he taught could only drive just two sales on fiverr and nothing more after then.
Are you on bbm or any other means to connect you.
Il be grateful

Find me on twitter @dotunolukoya

carik: @op.... Thanks for good post
I will be happy if you can be a lead to me In Internet business
Iv bn meeting fake and scammers here and have gone far as paying money for some cheap and wasteful resource on fiverr.
I just need a sincere relationship or probably someone I can call my online dad.i won't mind doing anything for this person even if it requires paying later on.Jus so tired of no direction
Thanks

Online daddy ke? I am just like you bro..., let us learn together. I don't need any dime. I am happy to share what I have learnt and know.

not4sure: I am just trying to know some of online business @ OP please do u have list of some of these business pls share... Thanks

What do you have interest in? A way to start an online business is around your interests, passion, strength, skills, experience.

The question that I would rather you ask yourself is 'how can I turn this into an online business?'

GeneralShepherd: Since I officially dumped the idea of a god, I haven't seen my parents. I went home this christmas,it was a wonderful holiday for me,little did I know my mum was hurting deep down inside!

She called me today being the 1st of January 2014 and started telling me how she asked Yahweh to give her a son after she had four girls(who are all married) which He did according to her. She told me how she has barely slept most nights in the pasy year because of my atheism. Also said it might lead her to her early grave if I continue living without god.

My dilemma is I can't pretend about god and the bible,yet I don't want my mum to die or have sleepless nights! When people read the bible the smile on face shows I don't believe any of it, when I try to pray I feel like I'm mad talking to myself or like a kid talking to Barney and friends!

How do I undo what has been done! How do I unknow what I know about god and religion? How do I ignore the inconsistencies?

I love my mum so much and will gladly become a sheeple for her to be happy

Tough one bro...

This story below is that of someone that went from being an atheist to a christian...

''Her marriage was marred by difficulties that included financial problems, as well as her husband's alcoholism and infidelities. Gresham often had drunken, violent outbursts where he assaulted his wife and children. Davidman wrote that her husband had telephoned her, one day in spring 1946, telling her that he was having a nervous breakdown, and didn't know when he would return home.[5][15] Afterwards, she suffered from a defeated emotional state.[4] She then had an experience that she described as: "for the first time my pride was forced to admit that I was not, after all, 'the master of my fate'. . . All my defenses – all the walls of arrogance and cocksureness and self-love behind which I had hid from God – went down momentarily – and God came in..'

You can read more at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joy_Davidman

I was at the supermarket the other day and I saw a magazine with the title ''HOW TO SETUP AN ONLINE BUSINESS 2014''. Being someone that is so passionate about online business, I grabbed the magazine not minding how much it would cost me. It was not until I got to the cashier that I realized how much it cost but I bought it anyway.

I have decided to share some of the stuffs I am getting from the magazine on NairaLand. Who knows it may help someone start his/her online business in 2014. There are a lot of stuff in there (PLANNING, BUILDING AND MARKETING) but I will try my best to share as frequently as possible. I welcome you to join me on this journey of knowledge sharing as I start with, 'Why an Internet Business?'

Why an Internet Business?

Low startup costs - You can think of an online business idea today and you are up and running tomorrow.
Long opening hours - On the internet there are no closing hours for shops. As long as your servers are up and running, you are open 24/7, 365 days.
Testing - It is easy to test various ideas and see what is working or not.
Scale - Internet businesses are flexible - you can be running an internet business while still maintaining a 9 - 5 job.
Competing with the big boys
- If you have a well designed website, you can compete with the leaders in your chosen industry.
Reach - It allows you to go beyond a geographical location, thereby allowing you to reach millions of people.

Just as it is easy for you to start an online business, so it is easy for anyone to start as well. The major challenge internet businesses face is in the area of competition. Once people see you are succeeding, everybody wants to do what you are doing. To checkmate this disadvantage, you need to have the 'first mover advantage' mentality and stay ahead of the game.


I welcome any further addition or subtraction.

Next post 'What Are You Good At' is at https://www.nairaland.com/1581802/how-setup-online-business-2014

shoerack6: Thanks for your advice but the thing is we have separate room but when it's time to sleep he comes to my room. So practically, when he's angry, he'll decide to sleep in his room.
Yes I have two kids. I've stopped cooking for him whenever is angry cos if I see d food there on the table, I get more heart broken.

Don't stop cooking for him.

A soft answer turns away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger - Proverbs 15:1

NairaLanders please give this guy a standing ovation! Wow..., the first guy to say NO to sex in the history of humanity. Amazing! OP, when I grow up, I want to be like you.

In US..., they still regret stopping slave trade. That is how racist they are!

A year of LOVE and being your brother's keeper.

That is my own prophecy.

Tundeiab: Ok, you already know that Tukur will resign... Bros I hail o.

I hail am too o. Abeg help ask where hin church dey?

cramjones: In the words of my friend - Patrick Obahiagon - Very lugubrious, unwitty and empty statement to make in a new year

When is Patrick Obahiagbon joining NairaLand?

By a guy or a girl?

Even before there was light in the bible, the Spirit of God was hovering. It was after that he said, "let there be light"

The new companies are in the "hovering" phase to analyze the current power situation.

Just my opinion....lol