₦airaland Forum

ILoveCockaCola:
No, the matured lady at the back

Hahhaahhah.....no wonder u no look d camera!

tunmidob:
the unborn child will be really beautiful... I can feel it

Our unborn child will win miss universe... I can smell it!

ILoveCockaCola:
Come to my plc by 12 mid nite...

Why 12 midnite? U be witch ni?
BTW! Is DAT u on d profile? D yellow pawpaw girl?

FuckBuhari:
Lord! Forgive Me, For I Can't Resist These Temptation...



Sighting My Jelly Perfumed Vaseline

I bind daT Vaseline spirit in u in Jesus name!

ClassCaptain:
yes....


I remember a few months ago ...Then a nairalander I really liked contacted me ...I was filled with exceeding joy as I discovered that she stayed in the same vicinity I was...

I immediately entered a joyful mood as I suspected it was the tithe I paid last month that brought such joyous news to my doorstep..for the first time in 6 months, I rushed outside to buy malt which I mixed with condensed peak milk to celebrate this legendary feat..

Soon she stated that she wanted to meet the so called class captain and I jumped with joy as I instantly accepted this delicious and impasse kalitu offer from this NL lady...

In order not to dissapoint her , I hurriedly called a couple of my friends and by borrowed money around..I was share able to raise. 5k.. with the money I kept in my Kolo to buy a new phone, I broke kolo and got one thousand and 50 naira..

fast forward to the big day, I charged my phone full hoping to take pictures and post on NL with this most wanted lady..Haven soaked my shirt in starch three days before and with a very good charcoal iron which I got after they cut our light for six weeks, I made sure my clothes were gaithored...

with my brown sebago, and 250 naira dolce and gabbana glasses, I set out for the venue of the date and hired a taxi so she go know say today na today..

I got in waiting for her only to see a lady in Mercedes cl 2016 latest parking in front of the restaurant.. she picked he phone and dialled a number which unfortunately had to be mine..

I was already looking for a backdoor to escape when she suddenly entered and sighted me .with a wide smile, she gave me a hug as my heavy northerner perfume entered her nostrils...

I am very hungry ' was the first statement that came out of her mouth...

Is that ur car beside the blue van ..that green one....was the 2nd statement that came out of her mouth.....

...


To be continued.....

Liaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrr!

henrylowe:
Okada drop me here, I say drop me here! I'm coming to share mine

I met a lady online and we started crushing on each other. After few months of regular calls and chat, we scheduled an appointment to meet in my house but all my effort to make her come to my house proved abortive because she insisted we had a rendezvous at an eatery. I guess she thought I wanted to comb her

She called me and informed me she was in my area a d I went to pick her up and took her straight to the eatery with just N300 in my pocket. My aim was that patapata she go drink a bottle of coke which costs N150 and a pie of N150, but to my greatest shock, we told me she wanted something more and I was being open to her that I had only N400 in my pocket

She began to rain curses on me loudly that she retreats having a dating with someone who can't afford a bottle of coke. I felt the ground should open and swallow me up cos everybody in the eatery was looking at me pitifully

I can't remember how I left the eatery that that

Lmao at this! I feel Ur pain bro! DeM girls got no chills!

ILoveCockaCola:
This is why i sometimes wish if i was a WITCH... Trust these militant wont even use condom

How do we know Ur not! Show Me Ur face or ahdonbilivit!
BTW! Am sorry about d way d girls were treated!

Damilolababy:
Lol

See her teeth!

Oma307:
anywhere you hear sex and romance be ready sure that you either meet damilolababy or Trappqueen77

I concur!!!!!

macluvph1:
You just comment without comprehending, you said pele oooo(its either you are making a jest or you are mocking yourself not me)so i have to tell you that either of them you should pity for yourself not me.

No vex oga! I no won fight abeg! I never chop today!

Delicious22:
Oh my God!!!! And I've just wasted my jar of VASELINE on Serena Williams.


Any colleague with a vaseline to spare? I'll return it.

Vaseline no dey right now..but I get Dermatol!

BlackMystery:
Boko haram Leader

Yeeeeeeeeeee!

mznel:
Lmao. No b only u ooo. Na so my gf f claim she's a virgin until I caught her sex chatting with a fellow girl. And even came to realise no b today she start am n she isn't any virgin
Girls can lie ehhh for Africa

In fact ..I think many girls are related to Lai Mohammed!

Zedoo:
Its in their nature...don't you realize Women easily touch each other, hug, peck n call each other "dear" n darling n all dat stuff whereas niggas even your homie put hand for your shoulder you go feel one kind....

At a point either in school or somewhere girls get a "beyond normal" kiss from an older girl....some go ahead to engage in d act after that...otthers baack off....or are lucky to get the male feel....n decide to go d normal route...
In secondary school most gurl groupies are lesbo...leaning anyhow on demselves, holding hands while walking, discouraging boys who wana go for their "besties" etc...

University dey go deeper....
Most people who claim to.have "school mothers" who take care of them are lesbians....

Expand the equation and the amount of gurls who haven't encountered lesbianism might be just 2% in Nigeria....
Abroad BROS, those animal lashing folks are 100% bisexual.

What an eye opener! Thumbs up bro!

Zedoo:
At a point in their lives, every gurl experiences a lesbian encounter or indulges....

Wao! What is d cause of DAT?

Zedoo:
Onoematopia!!!

bleeped up right?

Immorttal:
I,ve read some weird comments from girls here,. like seriously who are they deceiving. Abeg free Chidinma, every girl is bixesual in nature. Its funny how some girls would claim to detest lesbianism, they will go ahead to stream that video and still masturbate enroute. Thats women for you.

Every girl is bisexual in nature? Ur source or ahdonbilivit!

Prestdude:
What many people dont know is that for you to win Miss world, Miss universe, Miss Lagos, Miss Abuja, Miss Zamfara, Miss Ebonyi, Miss Anything, So long the people organising it are men, Price must be paid, Miss Anambra 2015 may have paid her own price, but it found her out, I know this because I was among the committee for my School Miss (name of University withheld) a whole lot went down, desperate girls everywhere, I just had to pity them, cause these guys f**ked until there D**ks went sore.

Lmao @ their D**ks went sore!

BlackMystery:
Virgin whale

Loooooooooool! Y not kukuma tell me to commit suicide! Not a chance in d world of getting DAT!
Bring it down mai dear! At least to what I can afford!

originally:
IT IS SO PAINFUL,THIS SOMEONE I WANTED TO MARRY. I MOVED ON

I know bro! Mine was worse! She claimed she be virgin n so I must wait. But u know what...I caught her masturbating! N she said it was d lord's will DAT we break up! WTF!

BlackMystery:
It's just a dragon na.. small thing

Lol! Only God knows what u will ask me to get then!

OreoPaschal:
Lolz...Taaar! You be confirm afonja-pig

Really! Why bother to reply d so called pig!
E PAIN AM!
BTW....I won't insult Ur tribe.....way better girls come from there!

OreoPaschal:
Ibo or European...Yorubas are very dirty, they irritate me. Hausa is a No for me. If its not igbo, it should be European or American.

Really? What a warped generalisation! Am Yoruba n am not dirty! U should thank your stars a guy like me even looked at u!

midolian:
The man may be crippled, but his manhood isnt.

U hyper make sense! I know u say u get dvck! But here..take another!

BlackMystery:
You have to pass phase one which is killing a dragon ...

Almost collapsed with laughter at this! Babe..u wicked o!

originally:
I caught my ex of 6 years thru her mobile phone as a lesbian. I forgave her but she just wouldnt stop.
I had to breakup....lesbians are everywhere.......i hate the act so much

Sorry bro....me no con understand o! Correct dvck go dey n girls go still dey look for cucumber or is it cassava? I week like 7days!

beautiful232:
I twerk for a living......

so she still the learn work

Picture of DAT twerk or ahdonbilivit!

yarimo:
Chai that UKWU must be very soft

U get AM! Take another cold beer n add it to my account!

mhisbliss:
nairaland will soon explode

Like KABOOMM!!!

rokiatu:
mind your God Damn business is that too difficult?

Rokiatu dey vex o! Oya chop small meat!

macluvph1:
Don't pity me Mr man,pity for yourself.

Am not moved by anything because at the end justice will prevail,light will overshadow darkness and freedom will be for those who believe in it.

Who said anything about pity? U still sound like a prophet though!

Jessidaisy4:
You think what you just commented made any sense, stop this tribalism nonsense, Igbos and other tribes also engage in those acts.

U make sense die! For this, I dash u a DVCK!!!