₦airaland Forum

@morph - hahah i see you have learnt from experience and are willingt o do things teh right way - GOING TO A DOCTOR NOT HER PARENTS

no be lie you tok my dear - well said

Psalty:
I broke up with my boyfriend (of 1year) in november 2008 and in april 2009 i started seeing someone else. now my ex is back & wants me back in his life. the feelings for my ex are deeper than that for the new guy, but i dont wanna break the new guy's heart, & i feel he may be better for me.

what should i do, pls advice!! Is [b]'feelings' the main thing??[b]

No feelings are not the only things- especially if you at the age where you are consideringa  more long term r/ship with a possibility of settling down - feelings are as impotant as compatitbility.

why did you start seeing someone else without giving yourself time to recover and get over yoru ex? like you would only have to deal with the issue of takinghim back - and not the double wahala of hurting someone else!!

how open are you with your bf? - i say talk to him - it s a young r/ship so best sort out the issue of your ex now, before it gets deepr with time.
take time away form both of them and think about it - think about who treats you better, who fits in to your life more, who is ablet to love you the way you will love them and want to be loved, who you can build a life with - and i am sure if you are honest with yourself you will haave the answer sooner than you think

but be honesty with all parties - especially YOURSELF

izeek:
@ben2001
its more diff than one can imagine.
all tru i never knew i wud feel this bad until i had to leave.
several times i stare at my fone and am tempted to call.
was soo bad that i had to hide my number and flash her.
just so i feel some sense of relief.

wish love doesn't have to hurt this bad.

@luxoire,
but like u said,
it only goes to show that my whole being was in that relationship.
that all tru the times when i asked my self if i really loved her?
this was confirmation enought that i dint just love her, but saw her as a greater part of my world.
am glad i loved. at least i know i am capable of that.

2 very true statements - some men realise late in life that they can not commit emotionally - physically they can say I DO, and be there in person, but emotionally lai lai - they will scour the streets to see what new blood it has to offer - foreever looking for the latest challenge / conquest
good for you that you know you can commit and love one woman

it may hurt hun - but it does and will get better with time

@poster

you know what she wants - question is ARE YOU WILLING TO GIVE INTO THAT KIND OF R/SHIP - cos you know ur arse will be a lone the day you are unemplyed, broke or BOTH

Igwe.:
still digging how right you are, methinks something one has no control over is as good as something one's decision doesn't count.
How then do you intend to decide on what's beyond your control. It ought have taken you by storm and maybe, you can decide to jilt or accept upon realising yourself

you can not decide HOW you feel - but you can decide whether or not to make that feeling grow / develop to something more

pain is good - pain means you were sincere in your affections - pain means you are still capable of relating to ppl emotionally

have you ever been in a r/ship were you split up with someone and it doesn't hurt? it just feels blunt - like its done - like it was non-existent and life goes on - makes you ever if you were ever IN the r/ship heart, body and mind  

iice:
[color=#9900ff]So true[/color]

[color=#9900ff]My feelings are frozen Yes i can be open with some people and some things. If it's about feelings, i have no probs voicing them out. . .infact i make it a point to drive the point home each time - but people can be really dense sometimes, they don't actually hear you. . .they 'assume' or they hear what they want to hear _{cuckoo land}

But then again, i'm not that easy to understand. So i don't bother sometimes to express myself. . .they wont even understand a lil part of it, not to mention the whole thing [/color]

so true - and why dont i doubt the 'you're complicated' part?!!

hahha then me amnd mine must be onsessed with each other - we spend all teh time we are not at work together

and when one travels for business or the other - we spend well over 4hours a day on the phone + numeorus text msgs and emails

so all of your counting mins lol - me i am just laughing cos una never start

Love in it self is a feeling you have no control over.

However you DECIDE on whether to nurture that love and make it grow, keep it alive - or whether to let it die

edogram:
just open up, i find it hard dating girls who dont opened up.

u mint miss a chance with a good dude.

ture - but is he isnt patient enough and understanding wiht me - then maybe it wouldnt have owrked out long term any way

nalijah07:
Isn't it sad that people feel that they have to hold back. How can you ever experience true love if you dont take the risk of putting yourself out there and being vulnerable to someone else?

some ppl make you feel comofrtable enough to open up and after a while you have no qualms doing it - you even do it before thinking about - but other ppl you just know!!! theya re snidy lil f*ckers

van der jo:
i understand most people use it against when you do open up but eventually you will open up to someone who understands you.but right now never seen anyone who i will open up to

i am sure you will soon - its just a matter of time, and trusting a good thing to be a good thing when you see it

i have stayed pretty much around same weight just fluctuating a few kilos either way

i know a great crash diet you can do, but its expensive and you have to maintain it!
shame you live out West though - would've been great to go together

ziga:
@luxoire

I agree with you. But sometimes, with the way people speak, they will convincingly tell you that there is absolutely nothing good that works in Nigeria. Yet, so many good things have come out of Naija (moi )

We are our own worst enemies, always at each other's throat, and trying to feel more important than the next guy.

I think we can big up and seriously improve on the good side of Nigeria, and this will gradually overshadow the bad. This can only be possible if we work together positively (not negatively), then we can be strong enough to chase out dem bad people!

that one is ideal politics - you sound set to be a politician - tell ppl what they want to hear!
as far ppl are concerned its anyman form himself! - yet they pull together to better each other - maybe it will improve things as you say - but who's to say the greedy, selfish attitude of nigerians is not what has prospered its capitalist economy? look at more of the peaceful, docile ' community' countries like Cameroon huge potential, but no one actually bothered or selfish or entreprenerial enough to go get it

like everything else it is one of those things we have to live with unfortunately

by God's grace my husband will know me fully and vice versa - at the minute my bf is restoring my faith in men and the human race generally

he is soo open and honest i feel bad for not being same - but i'm gettiing there - after knowing his earnings for a long time - i finally told him mine - and he laughed and said slowly but surely we will get there - hopefully before we get married (by God's grace)

Am i worth all that and then some more - that why i only go for the best
(even if they turn to be ass holes occassionally)

@iice you are worth more than 8 ohh

i always feel like ppl are always going to use my shit against me in the future - so i keep ma shit closely guarded only open up rarely!!

its been an experience and learning curve - to realise i am that sort of perosn - for a while i was in denial, thought i was open and free like that - but i am not, and now that i have realised and accepted it, i deal with it better

still dont open up to just anybody bf or not - only my mama knows me THAT well

Baba kunle:
I never thought it could happen,we did it (sex) unintentionally, na she start am.she is sweet.She called me a night ago telling me she is pregnant,Wetin i go do? I release inside cuz the tin too sweet.she too like am.dis happened like 3months ago,now she told me she is, , I beg E fit be my own? or make i just tell her make she go? My Mind keeps telling me itz mine.

Grow up!! shey she forced your di ck too inside her abi?!! yeye man!
call her go for a test - and i want to think if you actually liked her enough to sex her then you like her enough to stand by her too and love your child enough to take responsibility - (then again i may be wrong, some of you men are diff species all together)dont be another faceless sperm donor - an absent baby dada

if you have any doubts about her promiscuity and the paternity then do a test when the baby is done - either way - you cant avoid it, there could be a mini- you somewhere

hahaha

ermmm - she should follow her heart - that way if it doesnt go well - she has no one else to blame but herself - stop putting herself under unneccessary pressure

Nija will always be Naija - with its ppl, its government and lifestyle - its part of teh reason why they are rising greatly in African,, it is also the reason why they get negative publicity

you cant run away from it - 9ja's biggest strength is also its biggest weakness

i cant but my know ppl that can - hey its a survival tool - comes in handy when there are no fancy bottle openers

JJYOU:
you willknow when u marry

hahahaa - abi ohhh - why you want lick soup finish before you start making d eba?

either have your ideals now and work towards them when you are marrie d- or wait and see how the situation is when you are married and handle it acordingly!!

me i dont know i have heard men confess it

hahahah @poster wettin pessin no go see for NL? dis place dey breed crase ppl - i bet your were one LOCAL VILLAGE CHAMPION you came to the city and better educated babes don fashi you finish - na for internet you wan come dey continue your hero skills

mai fren - u had better return to Ekiti and let those local/mad women continue falling for you - because your class no dey NL

nonsense!!!!

jay bee:
male or female?
fitness first, LA fitness?
must have (swimming pool, squash et al)?

maybe LA fitness - don't care what they have - as long as they have a work out section and some aerobic classes
preferably female buddy

MrCrackles:
Can i buy you a TANABE instead?

It is a robotic gym buddy and i will pay his gy membership for five yrs upfront

NL is full of lunatics and freakazoids, you dont really wanna put an advert like that outhere!

The choice is yours

hmmm that got me thinking - well guess i will just have to see

Must live in london, and be willing / able to afford gym membership

east london preferably

hit me up

i knew it was going to get like this - esp when som ppl decide to take things personally and start insulting ppl instead of sticking to the topic