₦airaland Forum

baby_123: Let me ask you a question. Who are you to tell people how they should react or fight for their rights when you have no idea what it is to be a woman? You probably have no idea what it means to be discriminated against because you had no influence of the circumstances of your birth, age, race or gender? Drop your misconceptions and high handed advice. Employ women and encourage them. The seeds you sow today, your daughters will reap tomorrow. Women are no weaker than men, when you can push out a 7lb baby from a hole the size of a keyhole, come back and talk about strength. About our struggles and how we go about it, leave that to us women. We will go with what works, if in your mind that equals losing our femininity then so be it. Until you know what it is to be a woman, and the struggles then I suggest you save the uncalled for conclusions. Stop looking at women as a weaker vessel or sex object, maybe then, you will be able to see above and beyond your bias. Yes, this write-up is biased.

Everyone is free in regards to his or her opinion... like you stated I have no idea of what it is like to be a woman that very true... but point of correction I never see women as sex objects even when majority of them prefer to be seen as such... I know and respect the tremendous value they bring to the table at their place of work, family and society. Women are the pillar that holds a nation...infact the world indirectly revolves around them. I never see them as weaker, stronger or equal vessels. I see we both as vessels that compliment each other.

You think this article is biased... I think its objective like I said earlier we are all entitled to our opinions. It's been fun getting your candid opinion.

baby_123: I read your write-up, tinged with a high level of sarcasm and high handedness. Doesnt take a lot to get all the hidden meanings. I guess slaves, gays and other minority groups should have put on their best clothes and sat down convincing people to give them a chance with soft voices and cooking their oppressors best meals and stroking their egos. Maybe you as a black man should have been submissive enough to wait till you are granted freedom to be a human being. Why the apartheid, MLK talks in baptist churches, MLK marches despite being humiliated and watered down with hoses, slave revolts and other struggles to get what you want. O, that aggressiveness should only be restricted to certain groups, as women are seemingly weaker than men, and should stay in the bubble where they are forever. They should be grateful that anyone has let them come so far. They can achieve more if only they will stop being aggressive. *yea, we know how well that has worked*

Baby_123 there is no sarcasm in my post... but hard truths that most women wouldn't want to hear...

I am not against women fighting for there right, I am totally behind them... what I tried to highlight via my post is some ideologies that would help them in the fight... because i Have Discovered most women are fighting the wrong battles, the wrong people with often time the wrong ideology or mindset and still wondering why they are not getting any result.

FYI have no hidden meaning Like You Postulated... I implore you to highlight but mind you not out of context.

Note I ended my post asking readers to clear any misconception...

Mr knowitall.:
^^^^^^I tend to believe that everyone does his or her part in the nation building thing...The Nigerian abroad sending

money back home to build the economy....The Nigerian abroad not sending anything but insults home to motivate the people

and shame the government...everything has its place...like you said "which is like insulting your brother in your father

house because you are living with a rich uncle." the brother in the father's house could use the insults as motivation

and work hard to get rich and get his own place...and after he becomes rich he can turn around and began hurtling

insults back at the one living with the uncle...that would also motivate the brother living with the uncle to work hard

and become richer than the other brother so he in turn can also hurtle insults back at him...see how that works?

insults have there place everything is just fine....

I know the kind of insults you are talking about... that type that spur people to take action but to be sincere that's not the type I see on Nairaland.

It's like were we have constructive and destructive criticisms. The ones on Nairaland are destructive insults.

All the same I get your point.

Vickyt: Certificate will boost your skill. Don't give up on education please.

Thanks vickyt for ur input

https://www.nairaland.com/1284502/men-women-not-equals-briggs

Please move this thread to the family section. Thanks

baby_123: Chauvinistic bull crap. Men are not equal to women. Save all this for your wife and children, and make sure you let them read it everyday. If women didnt fight for their rights, i wonder if your mother, sister's, cousins and future female children would be able to speak and be heard. A woman is not equal to a man, but can carry your biased brain for 9months and give birth to you, yet you reward her with such a limited article. Next time in your article, clearly state the women in your family are not equal to men in their abilities. Stop spreading falsehood, as women we have come a long way and will keep prodding on. Look at the statistics, women keep winning while men keep going to jail in numbers. A small quiz for you: Which gender has the highest number of graduates, and is most employed these days? I just cant with this write-up.

Did you even bother to read and digest what I wrote... before jumping to uninformed conclusions... .

Try to see my logic and fault me if I am wrong with respect. Look at the paragraphs that contains my assertion.

I clearly stated that in one of My paragraphs ..."The truth is that no Gender is superior to the other, or inferior to the other, but instead they complement each other" Until both genders understand this. We'll keep fighting the wrong battles and getting no results.


Remember I stated that...A "Modern educated woman" is not synonymous to bitchy, stubborn, aggressive, overbearing controlling, and domineering:-

Men I tire.... women as so emotional for real... am laughing in Chinese

esere826: @op

move this to the familly section
I feel it would be a better platform to assess your points

How do I do it.

devour129: I think someone should open a thread asking women especially the married ones reasons they think will force or push them to cheat.that way the men,Infact we will all learn from each other n maybe help us make better decisions.could have done that both don't know how to open a thread here.

Once a good idea comes to you don't wait act on it...I think you should open it.

Uyi Iredia: Nice write-up.

Thanks

^^^^ thanks Uyi, for your candid advice. May God see you through your present difficulties.

obyrich: Check oyin's picture and comment.

I just did... she make mad sense... she is an "asan'wa Baby"

Princess zoe: Saolab you cannot divorce if you have been unfaithful to your wife except if you have made restitution in which if that is the case, you will forgive her the first time out of the reason that you were once unfaithful. Bible never gave that instruction in matthew 19 vs 9 to adulterous men but faithful men that was why they said "if the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry". Coming to your second question. If you are a good and pratical christian you wouldn't have asked me that question. In the beginning God made them man and woman. Adam and eve and not adam, eve and evangeline. That alone should tell you the original plan of God. Apart from deuetromy 17 vs 17; 1 timothy 3 verses 12: Almost all the instructions given by God on marriage grounds throughout the new tastament were based on one man, one wife ideology. Ephesians 5 verses 28 reads HE that loveth his WIFE (not wives) loveth himself; verses 31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, shall be joined unto his WIFE(not wives) and they TWO(not three) shall be one flesh; verses 33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his WIFE(not wives) even as himself and the WIFE(not wives) see that SHE(not they) reverence HER(not their) husband. I have quoted enough. The scripture says something about some men "perverse disputings of men of corrupt minds, and destitute of the truth.....i hope you are not one of them.

Are you trying to use bible to make us not divorce an adulterous woman... Damit, unfaithful or not faithful. if she commits adultery one can divorce her.. My bible supports it.

lorretta u: like you're miss universe.please check other peoples profile pics before you start classifying yourself as the most sought after.cos I'm sure you ain't.and definitely the class of men who come after you matters.real polished and classy men don't fall for a woman who let's herself be walked over and pushed around.they love women with spirit,who don't take nonsense from low class scumbags.topshot men love a woman who can keep them inline.they love a woman whom the thought of her and everything about her keeps them from running after every dirty punny on the street.
Trust me on this.I know.
Cos I've got such a man.
PEACE

Checked your profile pic. you make sense, your man is Lucky. . But no insulting oyin50 she is saying the right thing

I won't

Mr knowitall.:
You are right.. collectively Nigerians abroad might not be missed.. but their money will be missed though...I think we can bought agree on that...

LOL yea, I quite agree... I will be a buffoon not to know that Diasporans contribute to the Nigerian economy One way Or The other. If you read my post so far...my statement is more targeted to diasporans who add no value to Nigeria but find joy in bashing her in the slightest opportunity... which is like insulting your brother in your father house because you are living with a rich uncle... To me that is sick.

But on a side note, your Nigerian brothers care about the money more than they do for the source.#fact

Long story short if you want to be missed or leave a legacy which you Will be remembered... as you build you lives over there remember with great power(affluence, knowledge, exposure) comes great responsibility... you don't have to be based here to contribute towards nation building, even your comments on social media can go a long way in putting some people on there toes... let your words inspire people at home, instead of demoralizing them... build Nigeria with words instead of tearing her down.

Have a wonderful life.

calebo101: How old are you OP? You speak from both sides of your mouth. First Nigerians in diaspora would not be missed and you then want our successes to rub off on Nigerians as a whole?

LOL ... , Try to digest my posts on this thread, before you comment SIR.

denzel2009: We are still saying the same thing. Going frequently doesn't show you anything, you need a prolong stay and semi integration to see if you'll still uphold your values.

That's the catch, I don't intend to wait and try to semi-integrate... I have some more integrating to do here. I pick what I want from there, and take off. My time is of essence.

denzel2009: bros, get here first and if your story doesn't change after 2 years, I'll say you are serious about your mission.

I have been there on several occasions(short trips to visit relation for Vacation) I don't need 2years to change my mind. Africa and Nigeria especially is where my heart lies.

Siena: Those who choose to remain outside Nigeria will also not miss Nigeria, or whatever it was that reinforced their decisions to leave in the first instance.

And that's FACT too.

One thing is certain, the reason that re-enforced, their leaving will be fixed to a large extent by our generation. And like mind like me will be etched in sands of time of this nation.

The last thing we expect from you guys is to miss Us and Nigeria, or even been Nigerian. All we want from you guys is to Keep representing us positively and excelling in your careers not the reverse, the change in perception about Nigeria as a whole is something we will really appreciate, than bashing our little efforts To Make Nigeria better... Reach for the stars Nigerians in diaspora your success rubs off on Nigeria as a whole...

2legit2qwt: I was gonna say so much but changed my mind upon reading the highlighted, the 'hardwork' should be you doing whatever you wanna do in Nigeria instead of traveling to the US. I'm glad you believe so much in Nigeria, but you should practice what you preach by handling your business in Nigeria.

As for those who you supposedly believe don't wanna come back, remember human migration has always existed and will continue to be. If Nigeria was to magically become America tomorrow, people will still migrate.

I believe people shouldn't bring down the name but you gotta understand people have different reasons for leaving, usually bad ones.

I have overtime learnt to work not just "HARD" but "SMART" FYI I handle my business here, and will Continue to, I will be a buffoon to think the exposure and connection i will acquire over there, will not be of value when i come back home.

I am not against those who choose to stay away, but those who bash Nigeria... instead of contributing the little they can to improve the affairs of this nation, that's what that thread stand for If you read it very carefully.

For those who choose to stay over their I wish them well, Not everyone Will Find fulfillment here like I Have Already said, But they should never in turn slag their contemporaries who are trying to build a nation they left behind With Their blood and sweat, or think they will be missed.



That's what I am trying to achieve via my thread. Not what you are implying

justwise: [/b]

Since you agreed with Siena's view why then did you start a new thread slagging off those who chooses to stay away?

I am not slagging those who choose to stay away, but those who bash Nigeria... that's what that thread stand for If you read it very carefully.

For those who choose to stay over their I wish them well, Not everyone Will Find fulfillment here, But they should never in turn slag their contemporaries who are trying to build a nation they left behind, or think they will be missed.

That's what I am trying to achieve via my thread. Not what you are implying

justwise: [/b]

Only God knows how you managed to come to that conclusion, miss me for what?

If somebody leaves Nigeria and refuses to come back its that person's choice, he or she owns Nigeria nothing, sometimes the name 'Nigeria' is even a burden.

So why the hell are you accusing me of being hypocritical? My thread is not in any way in conflict with my assertions here.

justwise: I think its hypocritical to agree that people choices should be respected then within minutes you started a thread titled: Nigerians in Diaspora, you Will Never Be Missed, all because they are living abroad and have the gut to criticize Nigeria ? And here you are preaching tolerant?

Did you even read or try to comprehend the content of the thread, aside the the title i gave it... I am not been hypocritical, I am been realistic.

I respect their choice. But that does not hide the fact that! Diasporans with no value for Nigeria will never be missed.

@Justwise.. are you implying you want us to miss you?

ogugua88: [size=13pt]I wonder how and why this topic became so sensitive and personal.[/size]

I am surprised as well. I think it started with people deviating from answering the simple question, To bashing Nigeria due to her many troubles in a Bid To give reasons why they intend not to return home.

Issues bothering around nationality, religion and race are very much personal and Sensitive because they define who we are.

justwise: Really? You really do agree with him and you still have this to say here? https://www.nairaland.com/1303672/diasporans-never-missed

I don't get what you are implying justwise. I agree we all should be respected for our choices as siena Pointed, But never to the continuous bashing of a nation that is still a work in progress... just because one is oppoturned to leave outside Nigeria and is exposed to the finer things of life.

And that is what the thread you are referring to stands for.

Acidosis: (Don't know if I'm derailing)

One thing is sure.. You can never be 'here' & be 'there' at the same time. There are 196 countries in the world and 3400 major cities in the world. It means you cannot even tour the whole world before you die if you decide to spend one night of your life in one village/town/city. U.S.A alone has over 27,000 places.



Life is about fullfilment

If you find rest and fullfilment in Nigeria, then stay back and live your short life (many have less than 80years to live; don't waste time).

What more do we even have to enjoy in the world other than what we've been seeing? (car, money, marriage, children, houses) what more?

The only thing worth fighting for is the immaterial - fulfillment!

Fulfillment will make garri and groundnut sustain a man for 12hours while smilling like he won a lottery. While the other man will cry for MORE after eating two fat laps of chicken.


We all cannot live in America, Germany, Togo, France, Pluto, Mercury etc...

Its all about fulfillment..

Very true life is a about fulfilment, and one can be fulfilled in Nigeria or in the diaspora, in good or bad Condition. We have the right to purse fulfilment, In whatever Country Or Condition. What I am simply against Is Nigerians in diaspora who insult and belittle their nation for what ever reason, a land where the fulfilment of mine and millions of hard-working Nigerians lie.

Most of us are happy here, a place where our impact will be more felt, a Place That Need Us, A place we are treated like a first class citizen.
For whatever reason you refuse to comeback, Just have it at the back of your mind, you will never be missed by Nigeria or Nigerians.

^^^^
I have gone there periodical For Holidays, Just this time I will be staying much longer. My returning is not an issue cos, I have seen the difference in both worlds. That wide difference is one of the fuels, that power my resolve for this country. The Abraham Lincoln, the George Washington did the hard work for the US. I will do mine.

Siena: ^^^ Interesting idealogy, and one to be applauded. Those who choose to stay away have their own reasons though, and should also be respected for their choices.

Very true... I quite agree.