₦airaland Forum

joseph1832:
Barcanista, the fifth point you mention about FFK selling his soul and Tambuwal decamping from all the political party in the world actually made me laugh.

It actually got me thinking, FFK, Tambuwal and you share a particular trait, You're all political prostitutes!!!.

So just how much did you sell your soul for, we know the amount FFK and Tambuwal sold their soul but you we don't know, so do kindly tell.

MichaelSokoto:
Viewing this topic: MichaelSokoto(m), thunder74(m),
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Eh ehn!
Oga Seun thank God say u dey read dis thread.


"Abeg na wetin happen to our dear Barcanista?"

barcanista:
There is also the problem of Intolerance from the "Progressive Camp". Which society can develop or change with people's view shut down?

barcanista:
PS: My problem with some of you is to make excuse for your leaders. A real progressive will move for the foi implementation in their states and not hide under a cloak. Thanks

9 Pieces of Dating "Advice" That Are Actually Bullshit

If you've been single and ready to mingle for any length of time, you've probably picked up bits of "advice," all of which add up to a confusing, outdated set of guidelines that tell us what to say and do (or not) in order to land a spouse (the assumed goal, of course).

How long should you wait to text him back? Four hours minimum. When can you sleep together? After no fewer than three dates. Should you move in together? Of course not — why would he buy the cow when he can get the milk for free?

This advice has never really been proven, of course, yet somehow we still hear it from parents, grandparents, friends and even ourselves in moments of self-doubt. The truisms have been so bought into that many have been immortalized into a book called (what else?) The Rules.

These platitudes are more than annoying to hear — they're harmful and deeply offensive. They not only put the blame on single people, but they also assume men and women play different roles in this game called love (not to mention that dating is only happening between men and women). But it's 2015. We know better. It's time to kill these nine "rules" once and for all.

1. "If you have sex on the first date, it'll never turn into a serious relationship."


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The conventional wisdom that jumping into the sack too soon will prevent men (and, increasingly, women) from seeing their partner as anything but a hookup buddy has been perpetuated for literally centuries. But there's no research that proves hooking up on the first date will affect your relationship.

A 2012 study from Concordia University in Montreal found that sexual desire can transition into actual emotional connection. And to those who assume men think less of women who don't wait until the third date: The majority of men don't actually believe that.

Yes, some research has indicated a correlation between hooking up early and lower relationship satisfaction. But the differences in happiness are slim, and experts argue that personality factors and family background could actually be to blame. So if you and your partner feel like going all the way, go for it. There's no need to assume a serious relationship will be off the table afterward.

2. "A guy should really pay for the first date."
Guys, you're officially off the hook. The gender wage gap is smaller than it has ever been, and "benevolently sexist" attitudes about who's responsible for the check are changing. A 2013 survey of 17,607 unmarried heterosexual men and women revealed that 64% of men believe women should pay occasionally, and 44% would stop seeing a woman who never paid. Only 39% of women hope men would not ask them to contribute.

"Equality is equality, and it needs to apply to both sides," Kate, 26, from British Columbia told Mic. "Any man who insists beyond reason that he should pay ... raises big red flags for me, for incompatibility but also for immaturity."

Though there are plenty of modern women who appreciate being treated on a date, we've moved beyond this being an obligation. At the very least, it's no reason to stop seeing someone you otherwise really like.

3. "He won't buy the cow if he can get the milk for free."

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No one will ever put a ring on your finger, the logic goes, if they can experience all the benefits of cohabitating without ever having to make the lifetime commitment of marriage. But the reality just doesn't bear that out. Cohabitation has increased 900% over the last 50 years, and a 2011 Pew Research study found that among Americans who have ever lived with an unmarried partner, 64% said they thought of it as a step toward marriage, rather than a life choice in lieu of it.

The advice is a relic of the pre-1990s, when cohabitating was still relatively uncommon and studies concluded that living together before marriage led to divorce. People who gravitated toward nonconformist relationships were thought to be less likely to embrace traditional marriage values like responsibility and commitment. But now, our traditions have relaxed, few would blink an eye if you signed a lease with your significant other — and plenty of those couples who do are seriously committed.

"If you want to do a statistical model and predict who will get married, it's people who are already living together who have the biggest chance," Pamela Smock, professor of sociology at the University of Michigan, told the Huffington Post.

4. "Play hard-to-get so you don't seem too eager."

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Source: Reactiongifs
If you purposefully act like you aren't really into someone just to protect your pride in case they aren't really into you, you're needlessly introducing drama and confusion into the relationship. Sure, it can be scary to admit that you have feelings for that cute guy or woman, but it's dishonest to pretend otherwise, and can actually have the opposite effect you intended. What if he believes you're really not interested?

Emmett, 24, from Minneapolis, said playing hard-to-get just makes dating more difficult for everyone, since game-playing makes it harder to discern when "no" really means "yes." Everyone is left feeling frustrated. "Honesty is a pretty important virtue, and being dishonest with anyone is pretty disrespectful to them as a person," he told Mic. Take the guesswork out of dating by just being straight with people. It's what everyone wants.

5. "It won't work if you don't share any common interests."
When people offer this advice, they're usually referring to superficial shared interests, like favorite movies and hobbies. But your and your partner's mutual love of long walks on the beach and House of Cards don't actually predict how successful your relationship will be. It's shared values on matters including sex, money, religion and running a household that really matter.

Avery, 22, from Ontario, admitted that she and her boyfriend appear to be complete opposites: He plays video games and listens to house music; she tries not to fall asleep while watching his beloved Star Wars, meanwhile ordering Chinese food he barely tolerates. But they share similar values.

"We both want kids. We both respect our parents the same way. We both have hard work ethics, and we both understand the other person's emotions when upset," she told Mic. "It's the deeper connection we have that makes our relationship work, and I believe that's what makes it work when couples don't have a ton in common."

6. "If you like it, then you put a ring on it."

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Sorry, Beyoncé. Your future as a couple doesn't depend on the presence or absence of an engagement ring. Couples are delaying marriage at higher rates than ever before. Since the 1970s, the marriage rate has fallen 60%. Reasons include the recession, a decline in religiousness, more contraceptive use and women's ability to financially support themselves. It's simply outdated to use marriage as a marker of a relationship's staying power. And studies have shown that cohabitating and married couples exhibit the same levels of happiness.

If you haven't gotten married after one year, or two, or five, that's OK. As long as you two are happy, who cares if you haven't walked down the aisle (even if your mom insists "no ring on the finger, you must not linger".

7. "You have to feel that 'spark.'"
Everyone knows the "spark" when they feel it – that pulse-quickening heat that signals, "Hey, I want to kiss you now!" We also tend to assume that happy relationships depend on an ever-present spark, and that if the attraction fades, we're doomed.

But it's not that simple. Bruce Derman, couples therapist and author of We Could've Had a Great Date if It Wasn't for You, told Mic that there are four aspects to determine compatibility: mental, physical, emotional and spiritual. You need at least three in order to make a relationship work. "The spark relates mostly to the physical aspect, and if you don't have the other three in addition, the spark may dim over the years," he said. Your relationship can survive an ebb and flow in "spark," but it can't survive a weak emotional foundation.

8. "You have to open yourself up to find love."

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Source: Imgur
Actually, it turns out there is some truth to the old adage: "You'll find love when you're not looking for it," Derman said. It is easier to connect with someone when you aren't pressuring or forcing yourself." Otherwise, you are not really open and the intense energy of your agenda will dominate and drive suitable partners away," he said. Remain open to love, but no need to act like life is one never-ending date.

And no need to, as French stylist Caroline de Maigret puts it less delicately, "Always be fuckable." You're ready for love, physically and otherwise. Just let it happen.

9. "If they're acting like a jerk, that means they like you."
Come on, people. Unless you're in kindergarten, this is just common sense. If someone's treating you badly, it's safe to assume they're bad for you. As Maya Angelou said, "When people show you who they are, believe them."

Firefire2:
I'm both firefire and firefire2. You can choose to call me anyone you want. Pls don't forget to join me and vote for Buhari come march28.
Sai Buhari.

Firefire2:
Stop it I don't like it. You don't talk to firefire like that.

Firefire2:
How dare you talk to the one and only true firefire like that ?. I firefire is no longer a supporter of GEJ's cluelessness. I now support change.

UjSizzle:
Virgo
Sounds boring

caselessogbuagu:
Hehehehehe...nice move. This is how we used sincerenigerian to kill sincere9igerian . Baccanista nice one.

experimentist:
"Boko Haram are in my government" - GEJ. He's the Commander

experimentist:
go and wake Andrew Azazi from grave and ask him.

experimentist:
It's a lie, GEJ/PDP are boko haram

WHY THE BOKO HARAM WAR TOOK SO LONG.
If you have not seen this, I double down on it.
1. GEJ and Ihejirika and Azazi were confronting and killing Boko Haram
2. El Rufai, Buhari and the opposition and Northern sultans said GEJ and Ihejirika was killing Northerners and committing genocide. That they must negotiate with Boko Haram and find political solution.
3. GEJ agreed and stopped the full frontal killings and tried to negotiate and offered them all he offered Niger Delta militant
4. El Rufai, Buhari and Northern Elders Forum lobbied Hilary Clinton and thus Boko Haram was not added to list of terrorist organization, and so they could go on buying arms and getting moneys.
5. Buhari refused to join the negotiations as GEJ did with Niger Deltans while he was VP. Like Anenih too did. (TRUE NATIONAL HEROES GEJ AND ANENIH, NOT BUHARI WHO REFUSES TO HELP COS HE SUPPORTS THE SHARIA LAW THEY BOKO HARAM AIM TO ESTABLISH)
6. America bans Nigeria from getting arms and stops south Africa and co from selling to us.
7. Opposition, same El Rufai and Buhari etc begin to criticize GEJ for not killing Boko Haram.
8. Again, The Nigerian army is unable to get arms cos of Northern Elders, Buhari, El Rufai etc.
9. Goodluck brings in Dasuki, a Uthman Dan Fodio descendant and he tries to negotiate with them Boko Haram, believing since he is Muslim unlike Ihejirika and Azazi, they would listen, same foolish thinking people who want to put Buhari there, have. THOSE GUYS LISTEN TO NO ONE....ONLY THEIR VERSION OF ALLAH AND DEATH.
10. Dasuki and GEJ and the Nigerian army have looked to China and Russia and even Parkistan and they now have the arms.
11. They are killing Boko Haram.
12. The delay in ending Boko Haram is because of Buhari, El Rufai, Northern Emirs (The Emirs needed to ensure all alternatives were exhausted. Now they are on board with the kilings, especially as their own son Dasuki heads it)
13. The foolish now want to vote for the very Buhari and El Rufai that opposed the fight against Boko Haram....a fight Ihejirika would have ended BRUTALLY AND FINALLY.
Vote Goodluck if you value your country and peace of mind. Buhari, has only one thing in his head SHARIA AND HIS VERSION OF ISLAM. HE MINDS NOT THE BLOODSHED. HE HAS NO PITY OR COMPUNCTIONS OR QUALMS. HIS HEART IS COLD AS ICE. Nobody can look at mothers who lost children...youth corpers and not condole with them. Instead he says more should die. HIS HEART IS COLD AS ISIS ..SORRY ICE.
Vote Goodluck Ebele Jonathan.

kaboninc:
Lool. Brother, do you think if you're kept in a room, you and cossy, with her succulent apple, you won't want to tap it, even though you just wan feel am and confirm say e big?

kaboninc:
There are some that you'll see and your eyes will pop out! those ones are the full ones.

Then there are some you'll see and you'll be like 'nyama'! These are the 'soooo big and excessive' types.

kaboninc:
Something that is full and 'holdable'!

diddydiva:


but am not flat chest sha. I don't have the boobs of cossy either.

diddydiva:
am saying big boobs ladies finds fake love
flat chest ladies finds true love.

diddydiva:
then go on liking big boobs


but don't come back here to tell stories that touch

as for the evidences, am not jobless.

diddydiva:
hmmmmm really?

I don't type much so you might really not understand me.

I said some are wise because some don't look at the outward appearance. those big boobs ladies drinking themselves to stupor are the uncultured one that allow their asset get into their brain.

of these marriages you have seen how many lasts?

my point: don't be driven by boobs and ass but by manners

diddydiva:
speak for yourself mister.

flat chest ladies are getting married every weekends while the those with big boobs are drinking themselves to stupor every Friday nights.

Some men are wise.

diddydiva:
To the gullible and carnally minded ones ....... yes

but to the sensible , matured and those with visions ...... Not really

jaybee3:
Oga, what percentage of the electorate will make their decisions based on what they read on nairaland?
Why would any serious politician waste his/her efforts to garner votes that will be inconsequential in the wider scheme of things?
The best they could have done is paid adverts on NL which they've already done, not sit around all they typing rebuttals.

I absolutely do not believe anyone is being paid to post on Nairaland.

PassingShot:
Do you have any shred of evidence that any APC supporter here is paid?

It's only the jobless ones like barcanista that go beg for favour. He is no different from those rented jobless crowds at political campaigns.

obi4eze:
You don't get it bro. He posted the screenshots of the private conversations he had with Gbawe on his thread. Nothing is wrong in him wanting to join but he used the wrong means...

NgeneUkwenu:
[size=13pt]Change is when you begged NgeneUkwenu FOR FORM OF SECURITY and he diplomatically swerved you aside, and now you are Singing for the PDP while eating back your Vomit![/size]

Berem, egift, ngeneukwenu, barcarnista, Obiagelli, demdem, Omenka, GenBuhari, kelsoft, OrlandoOwo, Caseless, MichaelSokoto, gbawe, donphilopus, koboko69, cramjonse, arresa, cleverly, ilugunboy.

DollyParton1:
Safarigirl please face your books. Ladies who actually know what they want and how they want it in life do go back materially. Your epistle is for the broke, ebinna and I never chop girls.
Till you have seen life beyond the four walls of your University, u cannot categorically post that ish u just posted.

obi4eze:
Exactly! The guy is just like water. I just wonder what would happen if he doesn't get what he wants from PDP. He claims he is not a supporter of any party yet he wanted to join the media and communication dept of APC. People like him are just looking for their own good...