₦airaland Forum

Ewuro4:
They aren't married?




I know right? Na wa.

I know they ain't married but from experience marriage doesn't change this kind of men. Sometimes I just wonder why saying a simple sorry that can even stop world war z is just an issue. Though I have learnt to always forgive ahead. With or without sorry though our human part of it feels we still deserve and I still believe we deserve it.

MEN LEARN HOW TO SAT SORRY PLEASE. THANK YOU IN ADVANCE.

My dear sister Laraoge, I can relate to what you are going into. I will advise that if you ain't ready to always walk on egg shell in your home, take a walk back.

Your partner seems egocentric and proud. U must tell you it is a wrong combination. He might say sorry now to please you cos u are dating but my dear sister in marriage he may never say it. Get ready to apologise all the time for peace sake, he snaps at you and you will be the one to apologise because the way you asked a question he may not have liked it.

He may be a nice man but a man with anger issues is a no no for me. Anger breeds resentment and resentment leads to bitterness and it can destroy everything u guys have built.

These kind of men are very difficult with that is why I want you to think deeply before you strt this journey. A man's upbringing has 60% role in helping him in his marriage. The remaining 40% is what he is willing to adapt and learn from his partner. So if he isn't willing to learn and adapt. What can you do?

When you guys are married there will be argument cos u guys will have to go to functions together. The simplest thing of how you took extra 5 mins to dress up can be a problem. It is a man that understand the humour part of life that will bring humour into things but of he his always straight. My dear think deeply. It is the duty of both parties to respect each other, but if he always want ro have his way or always rather answer in a harsh tone like the issue of phone call. It is a big issue. Feelings should be respected always. It isn't only women that should respect men, men should do likewise.

My dear think deeply and if you need more advice. I am willing to offer. I am in it and I can give you real time advice. You will bend and bend until you feel so empty. God help you if you don't start to resent him.

Ewuro4:
Oh my bad

Jokes aside buddy, A simple 'sorry' can safe a life in any relationship. 'Sorry' averts life changing situations (e.g divorce, and longterm effect on children ). Some men think it's an act of weakness hence their obnoxious attitude.

The point is men need women in their lives more therefore they should tuck away their ego & calm the fûck down to nurture what they have so they don't end up alone @old age.

It is like you and I were born from the same womb. A simple sorry goes a long way but have come to realise that to some of our men it is a lot of work.

tearoses:
Yes I do ma

Okay ma I will get back to you.

tearoses:
I have serrapeptase 120,000 In Lagos
They are going for 10K
Only 3 bottles left

Madam CC, Do u still have left?

That is the worst thing that can happen to a wIfe. A man that can't take decisions with his wife but runs to the mother. Yemi should know that she will be married to the mother and her son. Run for your dear life. Unless God intervenes you will forever be marrying two husbands.

Kiish:
This babe never smiles... i cant think of any pic where she smiles... wait, who are those ones with hair like fulani horse?

You took the words out of my mouth.

McBrooklyn:
Life is too short to be reading the f**k a smelly Kitty-cat wrote! Abeg, how much be fuel for una side?

You are a disgrace

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Occupational hazard. Back pain on the way. I hope they wold be able to walk straight at 60 if they do this job for the next 10 years

Knowing about temperament can help one alot. Especially handling relationships at work, at home and even in church. Strive to always study people so that you won't judge them badly.

I learnt and am still learning. You even need it when you are raising your own children.

Omoakinsuyi:
Happy Married Life Grandma

Nt^n ke afo ado. Ewu

Finding solution to prevent reoccurrence should be our main objective even as an individual or government. From my own point of view not using PPE is not the main cause I believe the underground storage was not degas well enough and a gas tester should have been used to ascertain that there is a great reduction in the harmful gas level in the underground storage tank to acceptable level. Also there should be an outside observer who ensures that people inside are still active and call on them at regular intervals. Also the workers inside the storage tank should come out of the confined place at interval to inhaled fresh air because that can't be compared to using respirator . We actually don't know the competent level of the workers and their health condition because knowing that can also help. Regulatory bodies in Nigeria are more after paper work, documentation , after their pocket and they are too reactive. Enforcement and on the point spot risk assessment is the best, but the regulatory bodies are sometimes not helping matters because most of them are form of attacking companies than providing them appropriate recommendation and ways to prevent reoccurrence when incident happened.

fatymore:
Atleast if she get married.....she will start losing interest...and I pray she does....We ladies are our own worst enemies..obinrin lota obinrin

Pray o that she married that the one she is happy with. Cos na so her hubby go turn to marriage counsellor. Yes o we are our worst enemy.

If tables were turned. That lady wouldn't take it from her hubby. May God help us.

fatymore:
uhm....all I have to say is...do everything possible to make him forget this Ex.
I pray the Ex get married soon to give u peace of mind..some Ex are thorn in the flesh...since they can't have him..they won't allow the other woman to enjoy him

May God save us from the Ex that won't move to the Next

Marry ke? Marriage doesn't change anything o. My hubby exes at least three I know are married. And they still talk and chat. Sometimes it is a coincidence they call at home but hubby doesn't give room for them to call at home. He talks with them while he is at work and delete all the logs and chat before coming home.

I think the solution is that since he is showing outright disrespect to you, you have to talk to him that business should end in official hours. He shouldn't bring the calls home.

If we start putting ourselves in other people's shoe, the world will be a better place. Some men don't want to do that because they see themselves superior to women.

The key is choose right and endeavour to pray.

danielmichael:
unam ikot

Afo ndo nt^n.

henergygirl:
I met this guy in 2010 when i went on a visit to see my aunt. It was an on and off relationship though.......during the course of this relationship, he slapped me and there was another time i was hospitalized, he came and left without offering to pay for the bills knowing fully well dat i had spent much on the sickness already..
Recently he called and said he wants to settle down and apologised for his past behaviour saying it was because he has this trust issue with ladies but he said he is trying to change........i said fine, he's even planning to come and see my family in June. But two days ago, i needed to clear the air on something so i asked him via whatsapp that my girlfriend wants to divorce the husband because he slapped her and he condemned the act saying it could lead to battery if proper measure is not taken. I also asked him that my friend's husband left her in d hosptal when she was hospitalized saying she has family so they should pay d bill. He found out that i was referring to him but his reply was that he should have given me two more slaps as prescribed and y would he pay the hospital bill when i was taking advice from my girlfriend....
Pls dear nlanders mature advise pls. Help a confused sister.

Mods, please front page

No matter what we advise you will still marry him. People will advise you that he will change and he did what he did because he didn't marry you and now that he is married to you he won't do them again.

Dear let me tell you all those are lies. You will suffer it till the end. You will end up praying for the rest of your life for him instead of you to channel your energy to pray for the salvation of your soul and your prosperity.

Well I advise you that you should not marry him. He has real trust issues. He has self esteem and egoistic tendency. Marry him at your own peril. Please don't forget to PM me for advise when he has started punching you or doesn't provide for you and the kids.

Run for your life my girl. Ask alot of married women today. Most of our issues would have been solved if some people looked well and never ignore the warning signs. A WORD IS A ENOUGH FOR THE WISE.

AgbenuAnna:
looklooklook at the nose its not the same person

Which nose? Kai they are same person jor just look at the smile. That nose is a function of make up o. Don't be deceive. That is Toke

It isn't today that I have heard she was dark skin in secondary school. A closer look at that picture shows that she has even started toning, look at her knuckles.

That is why MI said he will never marry a fair girl if he hasn't seen her childhood picture.

Thank God her hubby is dark so when they start having kids. The child can be said to take after their father.

pretydiva:
When she ought 2 b sleeping wit her man by her side..

If she no get man nko? Would you mind lending her your man?

Inspinia:
I no longer know what to do. We have been together for 8 months and I want to marry her quickly. I have my reasons. She has been my childhood crush for years and now that she gave me a chance I don't want it to slip away. Many guys flock around her so before one asks her to marry him I had to do it first. And she is very responsible and definitely not a fling.

But I have problems with her aggression. A little thing she picks an issue with it and starts dishing out hurtful words to me. I always try to apologise and make her happy even when she is wrong not me just so she will be calm. It was working before now it no longer works. Whenever I try to make her happy she gets more angry and tell me I'm trying to patronise her. If I take her out on shopping she will be so angry that I'm trying to buy her with money that I don't love her.

My fellow brothers, what do I do? There was a day I had to invite my sister to come talk to her as woman to woman talk this lady pulled the belt on her jeans and began to assault my sister I'm grateful to God that I was there even my left eye is still bruised wth the way she hit me too that day. And the worst of it all is everytime she gets more angry and more violent.

I threatened to call off the wedding thinking it will make her rethink but it didn't instead she got angry that day and pushed me against the wall. God saved me beause if there was knife or bottle around that day with the way she was angry sh could have used any on me.

Please I need assistance from matured minds. I love her so much that I don't want to call off the wedding I want her to be wife but her aggression is too much. She get angry easily. She outrightly told me no sex till marriage and I can't do anything about because she seems stronger than I am (Yes she works out alot. Perhaps because she is a model or so i don't know)

I need help.

Run for your life or stay at your own peril. When you die like this man that recently passed on in Ibadan. Just remember to will me all your property. Mstchew

Timbuktou:
Abeg, your self esteem is non-existent. You go to the back willingly, without malice, without drama, and your husband doesn't get a talking to at home? You are a modern day slave. What a shame. Just in case you don't know, your husband neither loves nor respects you. Pity, pity.

Do you mind explaining your write up? Well I don't need you to judge me or my self esteem. There are important things to me and my marriage than front seat of a car. I have more important things to think of.

You are very funny to think that mua will quarrel my hubby wen I get home cos of a front seat? Wake up dearie.

crackhaus:
Okay now I'm just going to tell you that I want to know you better...you think just like me

Woah, okay I saw you typed hubby somewhere...sorry ma

You got me laughing out loud there. It is just my nature jare, I don't take things like this too serious. I am more of a simple person. My motto is live and let's live. I get so irritated wen people have this sense of entitlement .

Your apology is accepted

cococandy:
@bold is the summary. He's obviously more sensible than this OP.
At least it means nothing but he recognizes that it may mean something to you since everyone is not the same hence he gave You the opportunity to go with whichever you prefer.

Personally I'd consider a lady who insists on taking the chair somehow petty. so you telling him to never mind is just in line and normal with what any mature person would do. And him offering it is also what a mature guy would do.
Not the OP kind of fellow. In fact the woman didn't even say anything to him but he read facial expressions and came to create thread on NL.

Agbaya

You are right jare. The Op has some ego issues he needs to deal with. He felt at that moment that the front seat is his entitlement. He should have stood up and let the friends wife be the one to tell him not to worry.

crackhaus:
If everyone had a good head on their shoulder, didn't take themselves too seriously, or didn't feel too important - would it even matter who seats at the front?

That the woman goes to sit at the back will not stop her from being a wife to her husband...that the friend comes out and moves to the back seat will not make him stop being friends with the man.

People just make themselves feel too important over absolutely nothing when most don't even have their own lives right on track.

You are absolutely right. People tend to take themselves too seriously. This front seat issue all the time. Humans should just learn to take life in simple steps but the problem is that we arrogate so much pride to things. Men and women having so much entitled opinion. I don't ever drag front seat with any one. Hubby comes to pick me severally and he has his male friend in the front seat. I simply allow him to seat there. Sometimes the guy might say oya iyawo come to the front, I will jokingly say oga sit there jare.

So much pride so much entitlement so much my space.

diehard:
For the past one week my one year old son does not want me to cuddle or come close my wife (his mum). Whenever I attempt to hold her, he will scream and push me away, only to hug her in my place. I didn't know young boys can get jealous over their mother.

Does any body have the same experience?

My son used to do that a lot. He will always cry and come in between two us as he wouldn't allow us to hug or kiss. He is almost three now and he still does that especially if he comes in and meet us lying down. He quickly comes and lie in between us.

You were never in a relationship so don't even think of starting one with him. Move on as fast as possible

tosyne2much:
I'm glad you have changed

Yea changed for good. Thank you

CaaseStudy:
let me navigate there

Copy ebankole he will do justice it it

Thanks guys. I posted this in 2012. I am a totally different person now. I can say I am more mature and can handle things differently. Thanks a bunch.

CoCoLav:
I like the question that got her and its also a bit ironical. She said the truth about all those things but one simple question...I expected her to say no and I was shocked when she answered yes.

The guy should get someone better....she doesn't deserve him.

I was even more shocked than you are because I expected her to say no but immediately she said yea I knew she will loose. The young man (her hubby) was just there stating into the space. I felt sorry for him.

If such program comes to Nigeria. I swear no marriage will be left. It is an eye opening.

I watched the episode. She came back on the show to say they are separated. I know the hubby is too young to take such things she dished out.

How could she have said she is a good person.