₦airaland Forum

Estonto:
I admire your wisdom sir/ma.

Thank you esonto...really appreciate.
and its a sir

napa:
We've been married for five years and he has cheated all through these years. He keeps late nights without any tangible reason. He travels in and out of Nigeria for the purpose of meeting different women, he chats dirty with different women. He calls random women at home e.t.c. He is also very quick to apologise and promise to turn a new leaf anytime I confront him with evidences.
The issue here is I'm getting really fed up of his kind of life style, I feel he is taking me for granted and just playing on my emotions because he knows there is nothing I can do after his apologies. He too relaxed with me and feels he can do anything and get away with it. I work and he does too but he knows I live a triangular kind of life. From work back home then to church, I'm more of a homely person. I'm beginning to think it's my fault for him not getting on his toes. I don't intend reporting him to any of his family members because he won't be chastised.

I need candid and matured advice please.

whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe it can achieve.... those were the words that first struck me as i looked at your post. I know u hurting deep inside. Truth is the best any one here (including me) can do is to give you advice upon advice. You are the one who can really actualize them. i read what you told veave.....about you not really demanding for money from him, that all you need is love and care.
Yet he still cheats.
and yet he still apologizes, infact very quick to apologize.
so...something doesnt just add up here. This sounds more of a spiritual battle than physical
I'll be frank with you. You seem like a nice person, and i hate giving nice people sad news.
The truth is....ONLY GOD CAN HELP YOU (AND YOUR HUSBAND). See, unknown to many people some men just can't cheating. Its not about you, its just a craving in some men that only God can save them from. But you need to help me, stand in the gap for him, pray for him. Dont stop loving him. You can do it, i know u can becos....you already know that WHAT THE MIND CAN CONCEIVE.....
I'll be praying for u guys.I'm sure others will too. Your marriage wont fail. God will see you true. It's well

marcopollo:
Chai! You this Nnamdi, you too wise! Were you a tortoise in your former life? Lol. *jokes please* But I love your advice.

Lol...marcopollo. All wisdom comes from God. No one is wise but him . thanks so much for the complement. It meant a lot.

debbie:
in need of a Very Presentable, well spoken Receptionist with a solid background in IT

Please the cv should be forwarded to:
tajakaiye@netconstruct-ng.com

Hello Debbie. Pls I have some prospects I need to discuss with you. Can I get ur email or something to reach u? Or should I drop mine? Thanks

mrk74:
I do feel that I’m a very lucky man to have a very compatible lady as my wife. We love each other so well and I strongly believe we were meant for each other. However, I have one issue. When she has issue with a suggestion, request or complain she may agree without stating or discussing her objections but will simply not take the suggestion. Sometimes she will out rightly disobey me. The result will be me complaining severally and eventually getting upset. We hardly have issues, but when we do it’s usually because of something like this. We had dated for about 3 years before marriage. We had no issue in our 1st two years. Not that there was no complain at all but we easily made adjustments to accommodate each other. But there were several instances of this kind of issues in our 3rd year and I was seriously bothered. We had a very serious misunderstanding still from this kind of issue few months before we got married. At a point I asked her if I’m difficult and she told me that I nag. It was very embarrassing but when I the dictionary definition of nagging again which states that “(of a person) constantly harassing someone to do something”, then I agreed that I did nag. Then I realized how easy a partner’s action/inaction could make the other to nag.

Just before we began the process towards marriage I had to extract commitments from her for us to avoid this kind of issues in the future. I had explained how we could have handled situations like this better and the fact that she shouldn’t make it a big deal to apologise and she agreed with me. We got married on 30th December 2015 and we have not had issues since then till few days ago. I told her to stop using an item for cooking due to the health challenge I have with the item when it much in the food. I had previously asked for her to avoid putting too much of it which she agreed but she will fail on about 2 out of 9 meals. It was when I realized she can’t moderate it appropriately I asked her to stop and add it when she eats. She agreed but still won’t stop. I then told her not to have the item in the house at all. She agreed but will still buy it and hide. Even though I had noticed the presence of the item on meals for a while but I got to find some that she had recently bought and hidden in a locker. When I confronted her on it she only argued and asked if I had noticed it being overused recently. Even when I pointed out how bad I felt about her disobeying me she will not see it as a big deal.

I’ve been cold with her for about 2 days now (We talk, but not with the typical high spirit when we are both happy). Yesterday she told me that I have been behaving abnormally and I have not told her what is wrong. Then I used the opportunity to remind her of how she has been disobeying me including that of another incident that I had just refused to be upset about. All she said was that she had agreed to stop which I’m not sure I remembered her saying so. But even if she did, how is it different from the previous instance she accepted but began to hide the item. I believe she should apologize for disobeying me but this is something that she won’t do. As far as she is concerned, she had told me she will stop and expects us to move on and there is nothing to be addressed any further.

Fellow nairalanders, what do you think about this? Is an apology for disobeying me out of place?

We had agreed before marriage not to take our issues to friends or family which I strongly uphold. But at this point, I think we should get opinion of a 3rd party hopefully we can get an objective view on this and either of us can have make necessary adjustment for us to avoid this in the future. She reads selected items that lalasticlala pushes to the front page and I hope she gets to read this too. She will definitely know it’s about us. If I don’t hear her mention seeing it on nairaland, I will deliberately lead her to the thread.

First of all..I havent heard your wife's side of the story. So I won't totally blame her. In all matters I know there are always two sides to a coin.


Now from the little I have read I can see you and your wife are two honest loving people trying their best in this union. And that's the key to a lasting marriage.

1. First ensure you carefully filter the suggestions that people will give here (including mine). Be wise. Nl is full of sadistic and occultic folkes.

2. People are different. They also apologise in different ways. Now I don't know ur wife but you will be in the best shoe to know. Some of my friends outrightly apologise. Others come near me and indirectly apologise. Some eben indirectly blame me jokingly and tell me they've forgiven me! Even wen its clear to a blind man that they were annoyed. You have your own way. I have my own way. She has her own way.

Truth is an apology is not out of place. Maturity demands that one should apologise for a wrong act...but wisdom accepts that no two people are the same. Does she show an apology in some other way? If yes...then accept while still trying to show her why a spoken apology is more ideal. If no.....then it is well.

3. To be frank...it is very very wrong for a wife to disobey her husband. In that aspect she was 100 % wrong. Very wrong. But maturity and compromise is needed in marriage in all matters. Since you've talked to her and she doesn't want to listen. Call her and ask her y indeed she really disobeys and uses the product. If the reason isn't holding water....ask her if she will prefer cooking separate pots of food for u too. At least that will help solve the problem. She has her way..u have your way.

3. I admire your patience and love for her. I felt your pain. But now...put aside that pain....and pick understanding and love. Truth is, ideally in all ramifications, she is wrong. But let's forget about that. Try the steps I gave.. Esp the frank talk with her. Find that right time when she is in that emotional state of mind (after sex? Or buying her a gift), and tell/ ask her y she is disobeying u.
Lastly commit it into the hands of God. Only God can help u direct a woman. Because they are the last thing he created, very mysterious, very surprising yet very lovable and emotional.

And madam if and if I say (cos I know there are different sides to a story) what Oga said is true...then remember that only a foolish woman plucks her home down with her own hand. I've seen good marriages break down for issues less than this. Yours will not be so in Jesus name. Amen.

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Anas09:
OLAADEGBU does.

Thanks

HananHezron:
Google Chick Publications, you'll read them online; Been reading the Alberto series since Friday.

Thanks dear

HananHezron:
Throwback time

Do any of you remember a series of comic books known as The Crusaders, by Chick publications?
There were published in the 80s but became widely known in secondary schools around the 90s. You may remember the following titles:

Alberto (Testimony of an ex-jesuit priest)
Double Cross
The Godfathers
The Prophet
The Force
The Four Horsemen
The Great Holocaust

At one point, these comic books were banned. Looks like they are nowhere to be found now....
Do any of you remember them?

P.S: Feels so good to be back.....

Yes I do. I really enjoyed them. They were primarily revelations of a former catholic priest about the secret dealings in the Vatican . please do u have e copies of them do I can read on my phone?

A private school in Maryland Lagos urgently needs the services security guards and an irk teacher

Interested persons should call 08150904604 or send an email to hr@halifieldschools.com.ng.
Thanks

Hi guys. nice work going there debbie and co. i have an urgent job posting for who ever is interested

A private school in Maryland Lagos urgently needs the services of a cook, chef or kitchen supervisor

Interested persons should call 08150904604 or send an email to hr@halifieldschools.com.ng.
Thanks


Modified...
Thanks for those that called. OFFER CLOSED

Roland17:
Ma Ke? Abeg I be Guy oooo!!!

The writer/ owner of the diary I linked you to is female and should be getting the thanks.

Lol. Abeg no vex. Hungry dey catch me wen I post that message. I'll thank her on her thread.

Roland17:
https://www.nairaland.com/3000546/journey-motherhood

thanks ma.

iomoge2:
Sunday rice

Pls where do u live?

Roland17:
The probability of attending her christening is higher if your family resided in the States, if Naija, its 0 to almost none.

Nice diary, someday, i hope Zoe would read them, and understand the excitement that came with her arrival.

Pls can I have the link to the diary. Let me read and plan in advance for my time

The police is your friend....sometimes sha

I'm coming from your link. Just came bk to also drop my appreciation for posting this kind of interesting and motivating piece. Going bk now. Nice once

Fantastic.

ccollins:
long time and i greet you all my friends,i miss each and everyone of you guys, a lot of things have happened, evil tried to finish me up and end but i thank God for His saving Grace and i thank those who never forgot me dearly in their prayers, alot of things have happened within this year and many may shock you guys also eventually didn't need any school fees to see myself to graduation this year, it's not my own power or merit guys, just the grace of God, next hopefully is my law school which is 295000#,I don't know how the money will come or if my family will help in supporting my mom who is a widow but I have hope in God, infact need a total of 500000# to cover up all expenses in school.. to God be all the Glory for ever and ever, Amen .I had an uncomfortable night mare about imprisonment and slavery of human soul and body into toys,those toys were plastic controlled things like mario and like those U see in nitendo cartoons, it was terrible as U can imagine, it all started with forceful human trafficking around the region between north Africa and europe and,when U see human body and soul fixed in a weird kind of way to be exactly same thing with those plastic toys, you did imagine or think of a situation more worst than this were a person is both lifeless and help less, both happening at same time. it was that horrible, someone with any divine knowledge help me interpret something related on this twisted horror. it was so terrible that even though I didn't fall victim, I watched whole thing happen and even had to keep distance and at some time flee!!,it was not good

You really have to explain the dream note. Apart from saying it was terrible etc we don't know much. Kindly share. Thanks Sir

ngobaby2264:
Good morning everyone. God bless y'all on this thread. I had a very puzzling dream and I woke up with a heavy heart. I was like in a school gathering. In real live, I just finished my project, I've not cleared cos I have issues extra semester . Like I said I saw my self in a school setting like a hall, you know how full a hall is during a graduation ceremony, that's how full the hall was. Suddenly lemme say the proprietor of the school, a middle aged woman came on to the stage. And she called me out from the crowd. And one other girl which I can't remember. She started humiliating me right in front of everybody, remember the hall was full like about 3000 people or so in the hall. She brought out a certificate which was clearly not mine, we bear the same name but different middle name, different date of birth etc. The difference was clear that it wasn't mine and I explained to her that that wasn't my certificate yet she kept humiliating me, telling me I falsified my result. I started crying telling her I was innocent and truly, I was innocent. I told her it was a mix up. In that dream, I was so humiliated I kept crying and I woke up feeling bad. Please folks, what's the meaning of the dream.

Hmmm brethren I don't need to tell u this isn't a good dream at all. Its a dtram of shame and disgrace. You really need to cancel and reject. Then reverse it and convert it to blessings. Its well. The devil has lost the battle before it even begun

Hi guys. Had a very suprising dream. Though I can recall a bit. Now some persons talk about trouble or crisis from the north. In my dream there was a crisis in Kaduna state. Muslims were planning serious trouble against the christaims. It was like a one in a kind of Nigeria. I'm my dream I now said I was going to this our group to tell u guys (maybe for warning or confirmation etc)
And I woke. Seems we need more prayers for Nigeria. God help us

Enkaynwa:
I am going through a great turbulence in my home right now. The most challenging period.
But I know that the king's heart is in the hands of the Almighty God, and He will turn it to my favour.
please pray for calmness and understanding in my home.
I shall come back here and testify. Sis hananhezon and Analice107
Brothers Temi4fash, charlyG1, Nnamdiosu, etidy, Goodmuyis, Oyeleduf and others that I didn't mention. Thanks

I was about to say something. Then I saw your status/ signature and I smiled within. Your signature says it all. Look at it again. Its well

yusufadebayo02:
Dear Oluwaseun Osewa,
I don come to yarn u my depress story o. Cos as i dey is like
say i no dey exist ni.
I graduated at 27years (2010) from Kwara State Polytechnics with an
HND in Business Administration, Lower Credit. I observed my youth
service corp at Ministry Of Defence Abuja(2011).
Social anxiety hit hard
in the middle of college and I became a hermit, doing well
academically but suffering in terms of networking.
I've been struggling and struggling to find meaningful work ever since
graduating and I'm quickly slipping more into my self-destruction and
depression-related behavior. I'll spend half a week in bed and be
happy for it. I'll drink myself into comfort constantly. I have 4
years of off/on hard substance abuse, depression, self-harm and
suicide ideation. As far back as elementary school I used to write
suicide notes for "recreation", I glorified misery, etc.
While all that stuff mellowed out in school (except for anxiety, which
too mellowed out around my last year), after failed attempts at work
I'm feeling more and more like a total failure when I see how many of
my peers are financially independent and doing well for themselves. I
suggest continuing into further study which am now in PGD session at Lautech with installment option. The school was shutdown due to economic recession and management unable to pay their staffs salaries.
This is what i expect with high unemployment stuff, just to stay out of
the bad market and add to my qualifications, hoping to find work later
when conditions have improved. I have #5,000 in my saving account and
am out of my apartment in 3 weeks.
In the past I never hated life enough to end it, and I couldn't
because I knew my mildly disabled sibling would need me when our
parents pass. Also in my culture I think the grief would bring
irreparable harm to my parents. But recently... those facts are
seeming like smaller and smaller deterrents. I don't know. I sat in
training for a shitty call center job today and zoned out thinking
about where I'd do it, river or rope, what and to whom I'd leave as
notes, etc.
None of my friends know. I'm handsome, fun to be around, completely
sane-looking and sane-behaving (besides my scarred parts). I'm dating
a beautiful intelligent woman and have no problem meeting more, etc,
but no one knows how broke I am or how close I am to breaking. If I
did it I can't think of anyone who'd not be surprised.
I used to have such grand dreams for what I'd want my life to be like;
I used to be a skilled Embroidery Designer, my old Designer friends
are now abroad in famous stylist shop, etc... meanwhile, I wake today
and received calls of two of a beer parlour that pays token and is
itself a potent source of shame for me. How did I Bleep up this bad.
Baba Seun, i will like you to whistle this my story to does it consign to
come for my rescue.
Yusuf Adebayo writes.
07038898819.

Your first mistake....you looked up to seun to save you instead of God that created both you and seun.

Second mistake..you forgot the fact that everyone , even seun has his own problems. So why do u won't to saddle another human being with yours?
Look bro.....just look up to God. I know it aimt easy but trust me sooooooo many people are worst than you but them still keeping hope alive. Just be prayerful. Hopeful. God will see you thru ijn. Amen

benpuzzy:
Because that friend of yours doesn't know his right. I have succeeded to gain the respect of some of the police men in my area because i know even more than what they know. One tried to bite more than he can chew few days ago and landed himself into police cell for two days, he avoided my area for few days after his release cos he said it was a disgrace for a civilian to cause the detention of a policeman.

Bros trust me.....it'd just by the grace of God....not becos u sabi book. There r some policemen who no send u. Just pray you don't land into their trap. U think its every police station u go to that they ask for your statement? Or u don't know that there are some stations once u enter...and don't get bailed within a week they shoot the person and sell his parts to ritualists.yes. in this Nigeria o. See bro just take this prayer point everyday...that God should prevent ur path from crossing any police man.

1Smartkiddzy:
Good day brethren, please I need your help especially our brethren blessed with the gift of interpreting dreams...Bro Charles and Co...
I dreamt that in a church programme [ I didn't recognise both church & minister], I was running around, looking for someone to play the drums coz there was no drummer. Unfortunately, the people I found did not perform @ all. When they sit to play, it's either they play rubbish or some couldn't play @ all. I brought like 2 or 3 people to play[ I can't remember exactly] . So @ the end of the day, I played the drums myself & I played it so perfectly and professionally that people began asking why I was looking for people to play when I could play so perfectly.[ It was not as if I never knew I could play the drums in that dream, twas just that I was so busy, doing other things so i was looking for who else to play it but I ended up playing it very well]. And the funny part is that I play the drums in real life but I can't just explain. I played the drums in that dream so professionally like I have never played in real life. I have a deep feeling that this is not an ordinary dream.

Also I dreamt in another dream that we were shooting a movie but it seemed like the movie became a reality....and in that dream I was the protagonist, but I was the hero of the movie/dream. I saw myself saving people from one snake-like beast... I saved like 3 people from that beast in the dream an I even saved the Princess of the land.....the dream was like an action dream. Also know this is not an ordinary dream... I seldom remember my dreams but this one's I was able to remember them to a point before i wrote them down.
Please I need help interpreting the dreams...Thank you and meanwhile, today is my birthday....need your wishes and prayers more than ever.....

First dream: God is simply telling you that what you are looking for in sokoto is in your shokoto. (Youtba brethren hope I got that spelling right) it appears there is a task that you don't want to perform by yourself but God is telling you that he has blessed you perfectly with that gift. Note that it probably isn't playing drums o. It could be interssion or evangelism or teaching etc. Whatsoever comes across your hands....do perfectly well with all your mind sir..

Second dream: it seems God needs you for something. Most probably the deliverance area. God might have annuionted you as a deliverer. An interssor or prayer warrior. That's all I can say for now. Its well

HananHezron:
Whole new level?walking an unusual path? let's see, but i have the feeling it will be quite uncomfortable this time around
Oh well...

Don't sweat ur self dear. Daddy knows wat he's doing
Just wear ur new shoes and enjoy the ride.

temi4fash:
Yes ooh, You can say that again but the flesh can be funny at times.

Makes you think you missing lot of stuff or you didn't get experience youth.

But all in all God is been good.

I remember as a young man when we were told to write composition in primary school I write I wanna be a pastor

But as book no dipai full and use to get low mark I chanhe am to engineer, even use to tell my room mate back in the university days that if I become a pastor I won't be surprised not knowing say na pastor work dai true true...

Make God take control finish.

I dai loyal to your ministry oo

Lol @ change am to engineer. Bros u funny. Its well. god will take control. God bless u. Sleep well

temi4fash:
Yes ooh, You can say that again but the flesh can be funny at times.

Makes you think you missing lot of stuff or you didn't get experience youth.

But all in all God is been good.

I remember as a young man when we were told to write composition in primary school I write I wanna be a pastor

But as book no dipai full and use to get low mark I chanhe am to engineer, even use to tell my room mate back in the university days that if I become a pastor I won't be surprised not knowing say na pastor work dai true true...

Make God take control finish.

I dai loyal to your ministry oo

Lol @ change am to engineer. Bros u funny. Its well. God will take control. God bless u. Sleep well

temi4fash:
Yes ooh, You can say that again but the flesh can be funny at times.

Makes you think you missing lot of stuff or you didn't get experience youth.

But all in all God is been good.

I remember as a young man when we were told to write composition in primary school I write I wanna be a pastor

But as book no dipai full and use to get low mark I chanhe am to engineer, even use to tell my room mate back in the university days that if I become a pastor I won't be surprised not knowing say na pastor work dai true true...

Make God take control finish.

I dai loyal to your ministry oo

Lol @ change am to engineer. Bros u funny. Its well. God will take control. God bless u. Sleep well

temi4fash:
Baba me,

The difference no be here oo, sometimes it can be overwhelming.

Sometimes, am like why God no just allow me flex small before I begin these waka.

In school then I use to think I had a problem, if me and babe don dai waka well, paro don dai set everything would go smoothly until I begin to think make check these babe out una mehn, the next day na just begin beef me for no reason, the likeness go ckme turn hatred, no b once no b twice self, na him I cime begin dai keep my money jawe.

In my service year nko, when I come start these journey wey I come begin dai understand the thing small small, I had one very good friend, I had to tell her if you know say you like me and still want to be my friend abeg oo, no reason am, if not en na bye bye oo. She is married now though.

The other day, I dai try watch one season film, baba dai tell me say no chance, say make I go dai read Bible, I tried to refuse as I dai watch the movie the kind restlessness wey envelope me eh, I just respect myself off the thing go cook.

Habe you been in a service and the pastor go dai cast and bind and everything he says you see it happen or in a service where the pastor dai do in thing and you hear a voice telling you you can do better, you would do better.

Enough of my talk jawe...,

Sent you a pm...

Wow. Really? That's good o. U really have been blessed by God.

HananHezron:
Dream interpreters in the house...oga Charly and co.

What do it mean when you see yourself changing shoes in the dream?

Yes , changing shoes.

From muddy, comfortable,ballerina shoes (you know the kind female university students wear because they are light and practical and you can wear them with almost anything and move with them (almost) anywhere. i loove those shoes by the way),

to clean, formal, not necessarily comfortable corporate-looking, black, flat shoes? Don't ask me if i love those corporate shoes, i don't! At least, the ones i saw in my dream! The disadvantage with such shoes is that you can't move about as much as you please and you can't wear them to any kind of place;they don't even look comfy in the first place

I know shoes can symbolize the direction you are required or about to take, i know it has to do with walking or taking a path, but i'm lost with the rest...

Why do i feel the Most High is threatening my comfort zone or am i the one being overly clingy to my muddy, yet oh-so comfortable balllerinas i love so much

Tenk yew in advance.

sweet heart, why does my spirit tell me you already said (know) the answer see what you just said......The disadvantage with such shoes is that you can't move about as much as you please and you can't wear them to any kind of place;they don't even look comfy in the first place

well....i guess that's daddy's way of telling you..he's taking you to a whole new level.....but the funniest thing is normally shoes depicts marriage or relationship spiritually.......so put two and two together, perhaps he's bringing one of his sons to you