Lol . Very intelligent, realistic and valid submission Ima.
I already told one other guy on this thread how on nairaland their mothers are always an exception or a super woman who did it all and did it well.
Like, who do they think they are fooling with these narratives? Is it not the same mothers of the older generation we also have? Mothers who got a lot of help from their relatives/extended family, which allowed them to work or do business, and helped them to manage the home front without drowning in responsibilities.
I am sure a lot of households had one or two aunties (usually the mother or father's sisters) living there and helping out, but when they come online it is always.....our mothers did it all!. I just taya o.
But, I admire your energy in engaging with certain mindsets here. You dey try abeg
my dear listen, what those people are saying is true ...our mothers are super women and must be praised to high heaven....me for example i tell people that my mother is my God....what our mother of old went through ...ladies of these days can't do....personal i lot my dad over 20 years ago when i was still in jss 3 then and my mother took charge became our all and train her kids and all my young siblings are done with school working and doing business...so what the poster of this post have been doing for her family is awesome and should be encourage .....she only lack help and appreciation from her husband....so please kindly encourage her ,because it a beautiful thing
obembet: At 23 I got married immediately after my first degree. Had my first kid at 24, got a master's degree in my area of study, yet without a job. My ex was doing well in his business and he carried all the financial responsibilities of our home while I shoulder all the manual work; ranging from cooking, laundry, cleaning, buying groceries, making sure that every bills are paid, school runs, etc. All he does is to provide the money to carry all of those. I'm all- must -be -tidy kind of person so I made sure to maintain that.
I'll make sure I keep the house clean, prepare his favorite meals which I do by following the meal time table cos he loves three different meals for each day. Most times he will come back with a different meal to be prepared for him after I must have made dinner. This must be accompanied with fruits or nuts to crack, extract, slice and serve. As this continued I became perplex and may complain but he never listened or appreciated all my efforts.
As years come by our population increased and I begged him to buy a washing machine. This is a no go area as he believes it makes one lazy. After much begging and no compliance for about two years I stopped washing his main clothes, but washed only his inner wears. I saved some money and got myself one. He was happy I did so and gave me 25% of the amount I bought it. I later learnt that that was a bribe to start washing his clothes again. All my married life I never had a full house help. His relatives will come, stay for some time and leave. Even while they're still around I prefer to do some things myself for some reasons.
Now this is my round the clock non paid job from from year to year. I'll wake up by 4:00 am to prepare children's snacks or meal for school, wake everyone up by 5:00 am for morning prayers, bath the children and at the same time have clothes rolling in the machine while breakfast sits on fire simultaneously. By 7:15 am I'm with the children on the road to school. Keeps them at school and gets back home to continue the outstanding works. I may come back to meet ex still sleeping or brushing his teeth. I will serve breakfast, help him choose his day wear and most times look for one document or car keys.
I tried to get a teaching job which can help me continue my “rat race” at home. None of them lasted for more than four months, reasons I couldn't figure out till today cos I believe I'm very good at that.
By the time I could say “ehee, time to rest” it's already 3 to 4 pm, time to get the children back from school. Preparing dinner, helping in homework, correcting complains from teachers if there's any, bathing and feeding them. Sometimes I still find time to play and tell stories with the kids. I buy everybody's wears including ex's, especially during festive periods. I guess that's the only time I have to get new things for myself. It never bothered me cos I'm happy putting smiles in the faces of people around me. I'm always preparing home-made groceries cos I'm good at most of them.
I could remember vividly a friend advising me on improving in my outward appearance which I gave little attention to.
By the time I'll retire to bed, it's already 11 or 12:00 midnight. And so it continues.
I never received any form of appreciation; either in kind or in cash. And to worsen it all, he became so abusive; verbally, physically, emotionally and would complain and blame me in every misfortune of his life. Life was so terrible living with him. Yet, I did not complain until he pushed me out and finally left.
Most times we focus all our energy into building our homes, that is wonderful, thereby neglecting ourselves which should come first, it's not being selfish. I celebrate every member of my family every year but I was never celebrated for the thirteen years we lived together. After reading a book, “what kids need most in a mom” by a retired white nurse; Patricia Standforth, I started changing my status but things have started going sour in my marriage and I was kicked out by hubby. He got a nullification note from the church, refused me access to the children, etc. Though I'm working towards getting a civil divorce from the court.
It's been two years now and alot of people could not believe it when they meet me, as a mother of five who's so young looking, energetic and sophisticated. I've got a lot of space and time to travel, learn new things, meet new friends and recently working towards getting an MBA.
And more importantly, I wouldn't want to be seen where I was left.
Edited : Obembet
this is so so beautiful things that you outling here ...and i must say i am super proud of what you have done to your home and for him....some men are lucky and they dont know it ...and what you have putin into building your home can't be quantify in any way...either for money or praise you are simply awesome and God will bless you.... Don't change who you are ...keep on been positive and put him in your prayers....thing will change for you for the better...because there are Good men looking for such rare Gold in women to be their companion...i hope he get back to his senses and know that what you are bringing for him is more than money could buy or pay ....Good luck
A Nigerian couple, Ikeh Chidi Alloy and Lilian have welcomed a set of twins after ten years of marriage, Reports.
From The Information Gathered By , Mr Ikeh, who lives in Sapele, Delta State took to Facebook on Wednesday, November 10, to celebrate the birth of his twin children.
StagethemTVee: The Alaafin of Oyo , Oba Lamidi Adeyemi III, dances with one of his Queens in a rare clip. The 82-year old monarch is known to have a love for fair women. He ascended the throne at the age of 38 after a very keen 2 years contest.
obembet: Here is what most men are passing through from a jealousy wife or girlfriend. Some ladies have use their jealousy to ruin thier marriage, many young guy has lose connection that would have change thier story because of jealous wife.
If you were in husband shoes what will you do?
If you were the regional manager, what will you do?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iA60iiw-Zug if i am the regional manager ...tunde will be suspended for this ... and if i am tunde my wife will get a divorce for this nonsense...
Cyberterror: Funny but more funny is the same people condemning northerners for this move want to vote another northerner to continue from where Buhari stopped.
it should be condemned yes....but that doesnt mean we are not going to vote another northerner...when you guys voted the same northerner we told you guys but no one listened .....so Please drop this because no one is voting a yoruba man
guys Please i need your view of between setting up a new tyres company where customers can come and order and charge their car tyres and do other work on their cars with modern equiment and setting up a light company for sales of indoor and out door lighting ...which is more profitable on long term with a view to expand to other state of the country....and if in lagos where will be the best location for this set up your opinion needed thanks ..
Let's wait . . . but red flags from this interview were too conspicuous to ignore.
1. He has a rather convenient history of 'mistaken approvals' to add more floors than what is zoned to the neighbourhoods. 2. He doesn't trust Experts with his constructions. 3. He had a 'little problem' with this disastrous construction and was let off the hook by Sanwo-Olu. 4. He supervises himself . . . even though He isn't an Engineer.
I hope you can see the anyhowness of Nigerians showing here.
With all ur reasoning that u have, why can't u answer d simple question:
Which explosive? Are u the one who planted d explosive in the building?
I dont know....and am not even in the country for some years now....so how possible can that be...you need to understand that people that this collapse affected will need closure and not assumptions....i am not saying am certain it explosive ...but nothing can be rule out and to stop future instance.
15 stories was approved for a building. The developer went on to build 21 stories instead. You still think it’s more likely the collapse was caused by explosives than overloading.
What is wrong with us Nigerians?
listen bro.....building approval is done before the construction begin right? the engineer might modify it base on other factor in place....my agurment here is that the building might have collapse base on other factor like explosive and not defect.... in as much as the modification of the building approval is wrong ...which i totally agree ...other factor shouldnt be rule out simple
See as you dey reason like person where no go school... Na wa oooo
Have you heard about Structural defect in building? If yes.... What is always the outcome?
defect can be in design materials or workmanship ...i get it but we are talking about the total collapse of the building....i am not saying am certain it could be an explosive...but it cant be rule out in this case. Thanks
Even though some people claimed Fulani have been the one behind the dilapidated state of their region, na still same Fulani they wan still lick his ass for 2023..
If that's not confusion of the highest order, then tell me what is it.
at least he is been open about his idea of a better nigeria,,what is your....igbos will vote atiku again if we so wish....and guess what if buhari contest again for three team, we the igbos will help you people and vote him in again ....until you people have sense....no be only you people know how to do bad things to other....
irumanle: And who told you guys that the use of substandard materials is the only major reason why structures collapse? Go and watch his interview on TVC he is bragging and calling God where he is expected to explain technical issues. I did my NYSC in a consultancy firm handling two of such magnificent project. Guess what, No Quality Control, No Residence M&E, Structural (Steel & Concrete) Engineer, No Residence QS. The contractor will deliver concrete cube to our office but Oga will refuse to take it for testing because he wanted to save cost. The worst of it all, he stole the drawing from South Africans. Lagos people like to dey form smartness but na them mumu pass.
i get your point...we understand most times Nigerians like to cut corner to get few naira....but not withstanding this building is an almost completed project and came crashing like that ....it might have a lot of information we are not aware of....and i still will maintain an explosive cant be rule out.
The extra 6 floors they added is the explosive you are looking for. Put 1000 extra kg in a 2000kg capacity plane for a 6hour flight.
It might take off but mid air, a calamity may happen.
i get your sentiment ....but it still am assumption that the extra 6 floor might have been the cause of the collapse ...let wait for the conclusion when investigation is done....nothing can be rule out if not thing been equal...Nigeria of 2021 is not nigeria of 1999 ....so explosive can do such damage as well.....
No be only explosive... A witness said he heard a crack before the building fell. Not a boom, a crack!
a crack ....crack my ass....is building a wool that the so called witness is hearing a crack....listen it take a lot of high rising building to go down...and seeing them on the roof top shows that the building is almost complete....so an explosive cant be rule out....it that simple...there are two factor...
It's an assumption investigation... doesn't mean it's real...it's invalid until it become an evidence....
That is why A foreign nations will be different from African countries... You just don't seal the case You work on more assumption, analyze them...then if it produce no results.... demised it...
so true ...totally agree that collapse should be investigated....something is wrong and i dont believe it substandard material as presume...a lot of factor are required for high rising building to collapse and the case of substandard material here doesnt fit.... explosive shouldnt be dismiss at all my Opinion
Racoon: It is so tragic that his stubbornness cost the lives of many people.
i really think that the collapse of that building should be investigated because i honest can't believe i high rising building can come down that way so easily.... and it didnt come down when the owners and the contractor were not around...it when the were in the said site it too place....it really need to be investigated ....and from the picture i saw of that said building i cant rule out a bomb maybe ....
Simplythebest: You are right and i understand ur point. Let her go the Consulate then. But sometimes those girls can be smart they will be aware of the kind of job the will do there but once the get there they will change the whole story. Am talking from the experience. Never trust anyone in UAE completely
sure ...what you said is true...who does visa and buy air ticket for free for someone who is not their family....so if i am to say i will say she knew what she was going into... just that she might think she will make the money fast that why she might have agree... all the same it her safety that matters and lesson learnt ....
Simplythebest: The police will never be tired cus thats their duty they are not lazy Nigeria police that is after money. Going to the embassy is going to take her time before they could resolve it she must have spend excess money. I was in Dubai during the Covid-19 i no what i went through when i visited the embassy so police is the best in this kind of situation if the police involve the embassy better cus they won't delay or make her to spend more money again. So to my best of knowledge police is the best.
i understand your point ...but expect she want to create or make problems to those people then police is the best bet... and the police will still refer her to go to the consulate... so the best thing is to go to the consulate there in dubai and get a Tc since she already have a vaild air ticket... that is what i meant...because there is no way she can travel without a passport or TC ..Got it.
Simplythebest: Very easy to settle. Let her visit nearest police station and tell them everything that happens and that she want to come back the police will help her settle everything. Even to arrest the guy police will find him were ever he is. So the best thing is police station cus going to Nigeria embassy is waste of time, energy and money.
it not a waste of time.... the police are tired of matters relating to nigerian....the best bet is the consulate or embassy
Someone told my sister that there was a connection for a sales rep. Job in UAE, since she's yet to get a job after her NYSC, (you know how tough Nigeria is now. But it will require her to pay some money for her visa, flight ticket and other necessary documents, but my sister told her that she currently don't have money to process any international papers.
After much discussion this lady told my sister not to worry that all documentations including flight ticket will be paid for her but on a commission fee when she arrived her destination and upon resuming work in UAE, a percentage of her salary will be remitted to them until she pays up the debt incurred.
This was two months ago precisely August. Now fast forward to yesterday 3rd November 2021, I got a WhatsApp message from my sister telling me that she was being forced into prostitution upon arriving and not the sales job as was agreed.
I told her to find a way to come back to Nigeria since she has a return ticket that will expire in 4 days time valid till 8th November 2021.
Now the issue is: 1. Her Boss, as she called her earlier took her passport upon arrival in the pretense that she may misplace it or it may get stolen.
2. Her boss insisted on her paying all the debt incurred in processing her peppers which is 125% extra on what she spent in bringing her to Dubai, which amounts to N3.5 million Naira.
Please is there a way she can return back without her international passport since she went there legally and her return ticket is still valid.
Please we need help as during this altercation since yesterday, I cannot communicate with her as her Boss has seized her phone. It's now a matter of life and death.
well it a diffcult one , but there is always a solution ...i will leave the blame part and tell you the solution to this problem of yours.... where in dubai does your sister stay? she can not call the police ....they might not answer her because of the problems nigerian have been creating here....and 2 her boss as you called her having people working for her ...like cult people that she can easily call and give them money... the best solution is for your sister to run to nigeria consulate ...i believe it still at financial centre metro station area...sheikh zayed road and they can issue her a TC ....it an emergency travel certificate. and she can travel with that and a flight ticket.... your sister have to be really smart and careful.... and if you need further help ...i could
adamsmith914: Nothing is happening, always looking for something to wail about? Mention the state that you reside, 100 years, it will not be as developed as Lagos State, I dear you to mention your state? House Boy.
and who told yo lagos is develop....am from anambra and what can you say about it....every yoruba man now is from lagos... shame on you all and if it check you dont have any property in lagos ....claiming where you have nothing....
Pets / Re: Help My Dog Is Going Blind by onelovenigeria(m): 8:32am On Nov 15, 2021 
. Very intelligent, realistic and valid submission Ima.
