₦airaland Forum

These may seem hilarious... But they are hilariously true... At least I can relate to 5 of this points

What future oga? I don't think you have the right to judge what or how people see things in life... Some of y'all listen to chris brown, Adele etc... Have you seen em before?
To some, supporting a club isn't just support... its their way of life... It is like telling someone not to admire living in Europe or America because he has not been there before.

Idea here is, its a bad stunt by the bankPR... It is banter, yea... and humour... but whats the point behind the PR. what is it trying to sell...Going through it, I don't think it has done the positive for the bank. And I am sure this is not the last we will hear about it.

tiwiex:
Who or what is Arsenal or Chelsea or any of these names una dey call. I think we have taken it over board identifying with these clubs like this. It is now a sin not to belong to a club. I am a Chelsea fan, Arsenal fan etc. Which club do you belong to? kilode? Una don see Wenger before? The other day, I was talking about Amaju Pinik (not sure if i got his spelling right. Afteral he is not Wenger) and my colleague, a Man U fan was lost. He had never heard the name before. Seriously? Now the bank even tries to use it to do some publicity which really should not backfire if not that we have taken this thing as a religion. I think it is more like conformance now. You just must belong.

Nigeria cannot progress like this oh. We always keep blaming Government. Yet we all have (apart from me. hehe) jerseys worth at least 15k. That is 15k dashed (not invested) in a club not even in your country. Actually, I almost bought but when the attendant tell me the price, the jersey just jump back to the bench e com from before i kick am. I know the story. Our league is not developed etc. Even if the league was super-developed, we go still get serious colo-mentality. I am not a football fan by much but I really try to be conscious on local events primarily to patronize opportunities around. Dangote is already planning to pump billion (i.e. the rich man's version of the jersey) and someone will tell me the man creates plenty jobs here. No be the money e make here e wan carry dump on Arsenal? Sad people we all are.

I don't blame anyone. We all get into these foreign bug one way or the other but it is time we start looking real far into the future.

LOLS... I operate stanbic as one of my account as an Arsenal fan... stunts like this, though humour may be very bad on the reputation of the bank. I doubt this dude or whoever knows what publicity really means. It is a very stupid stunt. They should ask sterling bank why they are starting to make such progress in acquiring customers before putting up bants like this.

Arsenal fans, these has been and will be the price. You win it's not good enough. you loose it's all over... who cares... that doesn't stop a true fan from supporting the club they've grown to like. I am sure Liverpool fans would agree with me on this.

NgeneUkwenu:
Arsenal Fans Don Suffer!

Chai!!!


https://twitter.com/stanbicibtc

Wonder what he is if he isn't a legend... Some banters just no make am... This dude was obviously better than the shiiiii we have now... and he is one of the names to reckon with in the history of Nigerian football...If that doesn't sum up being a legend, what is>>>>>>>>>> Kanu is a Nigerian Football Legend... If you ain't cool with that you are one of the few... it is allowed! But ofcos...one of the wrong few.

HungerBAD:
Kanu a Legend?take time OP and no dey use that word Legend anyhow.

Meanwhile, nice car. Na God bless you.

All these Arsenal Supporters calling Kanu a Legend, just wondering what we will call Segun Odegbami and Rashidi Yekini.

If all fans take off their Jersey after every defeat "heavy" ... well there would be no point to wear a jersey in the first place... After all no one team has never suffered a heavy defeat...

powerfulsettingz:
Wondering why he's still putting on that Jersey after the heavy defeat

Hahaha!!! No suspect me o... Make em no come burst me...

sonofananimal1:
HE BE LIKE SAY WE THE SAME PLACE OHH. I DEY SUSPECT YOU NOW

This isn't a list... neither is it hatred. It is the current #trend. The #fact... And feel free to post what you feel is your own list or so... But make sure it is a fact else it would be bashed. Plus... take a break from what ma... not having better things to do? it would surprise you most of us dropping comments and reading this post are actually sitting our ass in the office with the cool breeze of the AC and loads of work... the break needed is actually when we see stuffs like these that are eye openers and true. #NoHardFeelings.

redgem:
These lists and hatred on female folks are becoming alarming and Unbearable...

You guys should please take a break....don't you have better things doing other than bashing and finding faults?

Naija Girls ehn... I swear, dunno what it is... lucky she didn't ask you for recharge card before she pointed you to her profile

Dklef:
MY CHAT WITH A WHITE GIRL :
.
.
Me: Hey. . .

. . .She: hey,hi

. . .Me: cool.how are u?

. . .She: I'm good and u?

. . .Me: I'm good too.kindly tell me about
yourself

. . .She: uhmmm,ok.I'm Vivian Craig,from
the United
States, I'm the only daughter.Still in high
school.Like skating,spongeb ob, dancing,and drawing. Uhm,i'll
stop there.Anything else,feel free to ask
me
.
.

MY CHATS WITH A KENYAN GIRL .

.

.
Me : hello rhonda

. . . She : hi! It's been a while!

. . .Me : I'm sorry,I've just been busy..work
and everything

. . .She : awwwwn,poor dear,i
understand.hope you are ok?

. . .Me : yes dear,i am..how's life in Nairobi?

. . .She : so so fast and noisy..everyone 's hustling.i just
resumed school.how's lagos?
.
.
.

MY CHATS WITH A NIGERIAN GIRL : .

.

.
Me: Hello

. . . She: I

. . .Me: uhm,ok..how are you?

. . .She: 5n

. . .Me: how's your day going?

. . .She: (after 15mins) 5n

. . .Me: Please,kindly tell me about yourself

. . .She: Y?

. . .Me: nothing much dear,just want to
know you better

. . .She: check my profile

. . .Me: seriously??

. . .She: kk
.
.
..Idiots

I think you don't get his point exactly.

AAU may have a strong alumni, just like some other schools not mentioned here... But he has just mentioned the top 7s.

tpiadotcom:
Strong meaning what?

You just compiled a list of the first universities in nigeria, that doesn't mean other schools don't have their own strong alumni, you simply didn't bother searching.

AAU for example, has very strong alumni, yet you did not mention them at all.

The private universities are backed by their founders and sponsors, you also ignored them completely.

Let me first say, that her husband must be dumb. In truth it is always difficult to say but no woman on a social media would exhibit such traits without an ulterior motive which he ought to have debunked before given in to her persuasiveness. I say this not on theoretical fact but out of fact of what it is today. quoting her word "flirted with him badly".

Now on to the level of him not recognizing HER Pseries ... I honestly do not see how that's impossible. In truth it may seem weird. But if several Ds where put together for her to pick which belongs to him it might seem the most difficult task ever. Not to mention. He didnt even recognize any of her initial pictures of body parts not to now mention her Private part.

On whether you should continue with this... I'd like to ask, what was the motive for which she started? to get attention, get laid or get money out of him. whichever, she would still eventually come out on this. Just how she does is what I can't say.
PS

Nice...

How would you list High end brand ansd low end brands?

Which brands in your own opinion fall into either of these two categories?

Hustling wah... Cunt... shiiiiiii... Disgusting hustling strategy...

misssclassy:
[color=#000050]The babe is just hustling. What else do you want her to do when the government of the country she lives in has made life difficult for it's masses.

By the way, this is what those in the business field will call a "Marketing Strategy"[/color]

I am 27, Working for two years now... I ain't in my fathers house but then am in my uncles... If u ask me, there is no difference... I guess if work environment where different, I'd still be in my Fathers house... Afteral, its his house, my house, our house... As long as it is not a liability to them or to me being there... I do not see a problem with that...

However... As soon as u feel u r able to cope by yourself financially, are planning to settle down , which i must say in ur own case in Nigeria... won't happen . Then I guess it's good u get your own place... for now... am still good...

What delays

butanep:
With the present delay associated with UI, am not too comfortable with the environment. I don't want a place that will delay my future plans...

Yea, absolutely good. I have a friend who finished with a first class in industrial chemistry in Uniben, he is currently having his Masters in Ibadan under AU scholarship platform. Its a school with the best environment for learning I must confess. Though I turned down my own scholarship to take up a masters in Ibadan... I was rooting for Masters studies abroad. Though work has completely takeng over now.

butanep:
That's the reason I want to run my masters programme in university of ibadan next yr.

I just love a tough ground to study. I like challenges. I did it in Uniben and am coming to ibadan to show them am capable. Only if I don't change my mind of going abroad.

And ur name na MONEY-CAR... Pls come and love me o, guess that would be both moni and ca loving... Though am not earning 50k ... However, well said... Point is... Its basically not about what he earns. Ladies are just more like becoming a liability now... Marriage or dating is a source of income rather than fulfilment. That is the norm now. and that is totally classless.

Monicasque:
ohh gosh this is really getting tiring now. Why does it always has to be about money. What happened to ladies can you marry a man who you love and who loves you back? guy I would marry my man even if he was earning R1K coz money is not everything. I know how it's like to be in lack, and I know how it's like to have plenty. so I have learnt to be content whatever the situation. besides, in a man one must look at his character and ambition, he might be earning R2K today, but the one who created him is not a fool, and I know for a fact that someone's current situation might differ a whole lot in the future. Obviously I cant marry an ambitionless idiot who I can just see that he should be left as he is because he is hopeless, and besides, if I also contribute in the household, that R50K might just have a partner / helper right ?

Obviously, U are a lady that would believe your prayers has been answered when a rich guy approaches you. Better shine your eyes... not all that glitters is gold. Material things aren't all... What happened to praying for you to be rich enough and u working hard towards that... Abi God fit answer your prayers sef na... Babe... God works in mysterious ways... U may want a rich dude in marriage but... God's plan may be weird... Although 50k isn't exactly right in my opinion to support a marriage... But it shouldn't be a reason for a lady not to get married to a guy especially since he didn't say hey "hey am earning these figures, so lets start dating"... If u are expecting a guy to disclose his earnings to u before u get married to him then u obviously have no value.

EggovinMma:
God forbid!
50k salary inside marriage. Na before ooo.But now, I REJECT EVERY SPIRIT OF POVERTY IN MY LIFE.My bible tells me to seek and I shall find, and whatever I bind here on earth shall be bind in heaven. I stand upon the rock of St Peter and I am binding every spirit of poverty in the life of my future husband, every spirit of meagre salary. I lose your hold on that poor future husband of mine.IT SHALL NOT BE MY POTION.50K SALARY KE? Which kind rough play be that?

Still, 2,123 police could not have been stationed. Even at that figure being realistic. The truth is, this is not the first time there has been a robbery of this sort in Lagos and this would not be the last... Fashola's claim is not only shambolic but a waste of time. It is the same ideology the APC has been throwing at the government with regards to the Boko Haram issue. He should stop blaming Jonathan for the robbery but instead, as the Governor of the state, concentrate his effort on pushing men in charge to track and apprehend the culprit and prevent a recurrence of such.

aljharem:
@op you should know that Nigerians are very stu.pid and gullible set of people.

University of Ibadan is further down because it is now one of the most difficult Universities to get in to. A lot of applicants except the most confident try to avoid applying directly. #GreatestUite

While ur investigating the timer in case it is a time bomb, runs out and BUm!!! is the sound... guess investigations will continue in death

Tandullceblog:
Shebi dats why I said investigate. She was obviously sent and not working alone.

I also heard GMB wants to back out of the peace accord... I wonder, is it the citizens who benefit from having a peace accord or the PDP. I rmbr a certain election led to the death of several hundreds... Backing out of a process that would prevent such to me relates to telling Nigerians he careless about their welfare.

Its either you have experience all these or you are just bored and feel to create stories to amuse people. Could you kindly lets have you link or source

As much as I care less whether anybody decides to rob acids on their d**k and rob for pleasure or stimulate their kitten with chainsaw to get self serviced. I can categorically tell u that all your above highlighted facts are not only shambolic but not so accurate.

The only thing I could possibly say about self service is that it is considered against religious beliefs and could make guys lazy towards talking to or approaching ladies

I am going to put down some facts to counter you and then I will put up the link to back it up.

MEDICAL FACTS
1. Self-congratulating can improve sperm quality in men with fertility problems.
2. Masturbating is good for improving sexual endurance because you’re able to control your body and understand your body when you’re alone
(http://www.medicaldaily.com/sex-one-please-15-facts-about-female-and-male-masturbation-289764)

Is Masturbation Harmful?
In general, the medical community considers masturbation to be a natural and harmless expression of sexuality for both men and women. It does not cause any physical injury or harm to the body, and can be performed in moderation throughout a person's lifetime as a part of normal sexual behavior. Some cultures and religions oppose masturbation or even label it as sinful. This can lead to guilt or shame about the behavior.

Some experts suggest that masturbation can actually improve sexual health and relationships. By exploring your own body through masturbation, you can determine what is erotically pleasing to you and can share this with your partner. Some partners use mutual masturbation to discover techniques for a more satisfying sexual relationship and to add to their mutual intimacy.
http://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/guide/masturbation-guide?page=2

That a lady woos you doesn't mean she has overtaken your responsibility as a man... I also do not think that has totally certified 100% that she is ready to marry you.

latuntop:
A man should not be discouraged by 10 NOs from 10 girls, but as for me i must woo my own girl, not that one girl should take over my own responsibility. A sign of a man is the ability to convince a girl to marry you.

You are right on point... I personally have no issues with women approaching me... Isn't it called gender equality How do they accept gender equality as a norm and then post double standard arguments. Women who have this notion about not wanting to approach a guy should understand that the way they feel when they see a guy they like is the same way a guy feels when he sees a lady he likes... So, its either a YES! or NO!... Any of the genders I believe is supposed to be equal to a rejection or acceptance... Since according to all we are all equal. I don not think a woman approaching a man makes her less of a human or wayward...

I swear u badt gan!!!

Tinubu:
Girl bit off more than she could chew



She should have left us e-warriors to give GMB all the political support and explanation.....Now she has added to our burden.... We now have to defend her certificate too


Very soon the trending hashtag might be


#ZAHRASHOWYOURCERTIFICATE


See what taking too much cow-milk during infancy has caused

This a very good piece... ... Right on point

Who should be security wise, the visitor or the guest Have u seen where Obama was taking pictures, while sitting on the same seat with other heads of state at Nelson Mandela's Burial ceremony... Your point is absolutely not in tune abeg...

Bishop4bella:
Both of them are sitting very well considering the chair they are occupying.

A mistake I see here is mr president suppose not to be sitting on the same chair with Mr kerry. At least we see how Obama do entertain or welcome high personalities from other country.

Our president is not security wise with that position he took with kerry compare with former military man Gen Bahuri.

Just look at the sitting sai Buhari

That's not a question... Its sarcasm if you'd noticed

Moz22:
dont ask me that!

I don't see anything bemusing about these looks... What do you say about the man sitting behind them

So, this justifies why she snaps with the Germans

Moz22:
was it not against the germans that she lost the female world cup?

By the time we run at every one of these, we would have ran the whole world... #RunOooooo