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Phate07's Posts

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RomanceRe: Which Nairalander Could You Consider A Potential Partner by Phate07(m): 9:10am On May 09, 2011
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**brings out diary and starts checking** angry
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Jokes EtcRe: Just Drop A Smile by Phate07(m): 10:48pm On May 07, 2011
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I have already contacted my lawyers.
I want to sue first so i wont be sued later, when i start stealing some of these jokes. undecided grin grin


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Jokes EtcRe: Jokes Factory by Phate07(op): 1:21pm On May 07, 2011
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This beautiful woman one day walks into a doctors office and the doctor is bowled over by how stunningly awesome she is. All his professionallism goes right out the window,
He tells her to take her pants, shedoes, and he starts rubbing her thighs.
"Do you know what I am doing?" asks the doctor?
"

Yes, checking for abnormalities." she replies.
He tells her to take off her shirt and bra, she takes them off. The doctor begins rubbing her breasts and asks, "Do you know what I am doing now?", she replies, "Yes, checking for cancer."


Finally, he tells her to take off herpanties, lays her on the table, gets on top of her and starts having sex with her. He says to her, "Do you know what I am doing now?"
She replies, "Yes, getting herpies - thats why I am here!"
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Jokes EtcRe: Just Drop A Smile by Phate07(m): 1:13pm On May 07, 2011
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El, why are you stealing some of my jokes?
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RomanceRe: Romance Section Chat Room III by Phate07(m): 11:47am On May 07, 2011
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Orlu? Nwanne m! Imma Isu? Ngwanu kanyi kpokpe nu mmanye, nuria oñu.


https://makebeerathomeblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/beer_mug.jpg

How i wish am in Imo now! Chai! Na for party levels!! grin grin
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RomanceRe: Romance Section Chat Room III by Phate07(m): 11:26am On May 07, 2011
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Really?
Which part?
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RomanceRe: Romance Section Chat Room III by Phate07(m): 11:20am On May 07, 2011
xynerise:
Rochas has won in Imo state. I don hammer cool cool
Today's party is endless
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Are you an Imolite? undecided
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RomanceRe: Should Have Been Gay, Wow! by Phate07(m): 11:17am On May 07, 2011
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^^It is heading towards the burning pits of hell. angry

I pity this generation. undecided
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RomanceRe: Romance Section Chat Room III by Phate07(m): 11:06am On May 07, 2011
angry angry angry
Jokes EtcRe: Am Not Laughing! by Phate07(op): 10:56am On May 07, 2011
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A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the sperm bank vault. She says"But sir, its just a sperm bank!","I don't care, open it now!!!" he replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are all the sperm samples. The guy says"Take one of those sperm samples and drink it!", she looks at him "BUT, they are sperm sampleshuh" , "DO IT!". So the nurse sucks it back. "That one there, drink that one as well.", sothe nurse drinks that one as well.Finally after 4 samples the man takes off his ski mask and says,"See honey - its not that hard."

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Jokes EtcRe: Jokes Factory by Phate07(op): 10:40am On May 07, 2011
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A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the sperm bank vault. She says"But sir, its just a sperm bank!","I don't care, open it now!!!" he replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are all the sperm samples. The guy says"Take one of those sperm samples and drink it!", she looks at him "BUT, they are sperm sampleshuh" , "DO IT!". So the nurse sucks it back. "That one there, drink that one as well.", sothe nurse drinks that one as well.Finally after 4 samples the man takes off his ski mask and says,"See honey - its not that hard."

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Jokes EtcRe: Jokes Factory by Phate07(op): 10:37am On May 07, 2011
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The newlyweds are in their honeymoon room and the groom decides to let the bride know where she stands right from the start of the marriage.


He proceeds to take off his trousers and throw them at her. He says, "Put those on."
The bride replies, "I can't wear your trousers."
He replies, "And don't forget that! I will always wear the pants in the family!"


The bride takes off her knickers and throws them at him with the same request, "Try those on!"
He replies,"I can't get into your knickers!"
"And you never bloody will if you don't change your attitude."

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Jokes EtcRe: Jokes Factory by Phate07(op): 10:05am On May 07, 2011
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One morning a woman was walking out of her front door, when she notices a strange little man at the bottom of her garden.
"You're a goblin," she says, "I caught you and you owe me three wishes!".

So the goblin replies "OK, you caught me fair and square, what's your first wish?". The woman stops and thinks for a second, "I want a huge mansion to live in.", goblin replies "OK, you've got it.". Woman again thinks it over,"My second wish is a Mercedes.""OK, you've got that too." "My last wish is a million dollars!". The goblin then says "OK, you've got it. But to make your wishes come true you have to have sex all night with me."
"OK then, if that's what it takes, "


Next morning the little man wakes the woman up.
"Tell me," says the man, "how old are you?" "I'm 27", she replies
"Bleep me", says the man, "27 and you still believe in goblins"
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Jokes EtcRe: Jokes Factory by Phate07(op): 9:38am On May 07, 2011
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A man & his wife agreed that whenever they want to have SEX, they'll call it 'PHONE CALL'. One day the man told his son.

Man: Go & tell your mum that I want to make a phone call.

Woman: Go back & tell your dad that theres no network.

Man: Go back & tell her that if there is no network, I'll go & make the call outside.

Woman: Go & tell him that if he makes any call outside, I'll open a phone call centre.
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grin grin grin
Jokes EtcRe: Jokes Factory by Phate07(op): 9:11am On May 07, 2011
aieromon:
Nice work here,mahn grin grin
jokingmary:
cheesy cheesy

LWKMD
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Thanks peeps!
Expect more!! grin grin
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European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga)Re: Chelsea Fans Thread : Winners of the FA Cup And League Winners 09/10 by Phate07(m): 8:31am On May 07, 2011
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^^Keep ranting. undecided
Tomorrow is D-Day. Will talk to you then. On the pitch.
Chelsea shall come out after 90 minutes as the victor.
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RomanceRe: Boyfriend Must Buy Girlfriend A Smartphone Or He Doesn't Love Her? by Phate07(m): 7:24am On May 07, 2011
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If you have the dough, buy the phone for her.

If you dont have it, then dont buy it.
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Nairaland GeneralRe: Is Jennykadry Mentally Ok? by Phate07(m): 7:09am On May 07, 2011
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OP,
What is your concern with her mental health. Are you her husband or popsy? huh
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Nairaland GeneralRe: Time To Leave England by Phate07(m): 7:01pm On May 06, 2011
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Am sure you wont be missed. Bon voyagé!
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RomanceRe: The Most Difficult Stage In My Life by Phate07(m): 6:56pm On May 06, 2011
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You are 28yrs old and you are still afraid to enter into the world? Why?
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RomanceRe: Question: Romance Section - Would You Attend A Nl Party In Lagos? by Phate07(m): 6:50pm On May 06, 2011
Question: Romance Section - Would You Attend A Nl Party In Lagos?
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Only if it promises to be really fiesty. And worthwhile. undecided
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RomanceRe: My Experience by Phate07(m): 6:46pm On May 06, 2011
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What to do? Fight him back. With a baseball bat!
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Jokes EtcRe: Am Not Laughing! by Phate07(op): 10:35am On May 06, 2011
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I know you would be great. As always. Am still chilling for my oha. wink grin grin
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Jokes EtcRe: Am Not Laughing! by Phate07(op): 10:11am On May 06, 2011
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No, it was not me. It was a friend of a friend. lipsrsealed grin grin

How you dey today?
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Nairaland GeneralRe: >> Nairaland Oldbies Meet Here 2006-2009 Section by Phate07(m): 9:25am On May 06, 2011
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Am afraid i cant disclose my old ID. For security purposes. lipsrsealed undecided
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RomanceRe: Am In Trouble My Cousin Wants To Sleep With Me by Phate07(m): 8:05am On May 06, 2011
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RomanceRe: A He Test by Phate07(m): 7:56am On May 06, 2011
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So you effectively want him to love and stick with you cos of the pregnancy and child? undecided You are in for a rude shock.
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RomanceRe: Romance Section Chat Room III by Phate07(m): 7:53am On May 06, 2011
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^^Did you hack into it? undecided
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