if you dont want him to tell then dont kiss him , case solved .

perhaps, but to be honest while the stat may be way off the mark the poster has a point,

ummm hmmm all you gfriends don abort for you abi

this is a scam , or the poster is deluded

@poster I think you BF needs professional help. I dont think talking to him is the solution. You need to simply send a clear message that Beyonce needs to stop being the third person in the relatonship. Leave it him to decide if its a Beyonce look alike he wants or you.

I fear you have also contributed to this situation by feeding the beyonce fantasy

all NL men not born of a woman !!!! say as you wish

several people here that have won the visa lottery and totally forgotten that they have a university degree from back home . Busy working menial jobs. Too each his own , but i just think that you could do better . Nothing wrong with doing menial jobs for awhile , but there should be a long term plan why waste those 4 years.

Visa lottery kid is not meant in a demeaning manner , just anybody who has won the visa lottery .

    aha so much vitriol

Kenny G , i beg to differ , I am not bitter. Reserve your comments for the woman bashing poster who is pulling stats out of his arse!!! Obviously he is not getting any hence the woman bashing

No , No parents , no work colleagues . i can't control what people post on my wall so thats a no no. My uncle is on my fbook , but he is one of the posters of inappropiate material

My parents can see me in person
My work colleagues are on Linkedin

abi o alll this stats that people pull out of the air.
@ poster I hope your family members were included in your sample set . Thank God you are not one of the ones that your mother aborted , shio!!!

circumstances are different . There is no cookie cutter family . Everyone that is determined to make it work will regardless of distance. In todays global economy a great percent of Dad's will have to live away from there family for some period of time .

Texas (Houston ), Georgia (Atlanta) or North Carolina (Charlotte) . Ok weather, cost of living average , black population ok (and educated for the most part) NY , Chicago , Maryland and Virginia are also good but pretty expensive. Would not advise it unless you have secured a good job in advance . You can work an interim job while building your career and still have an ok life in the first states i listed.


Most of all be realistic about your job search, US does not respect degrees or work experience from developing countries ( some exceptions) so be willing to make some compromises to build your experience level and if possible get another degree. Please don't be another visa lottery kid that wastes the opportunity by coming here and working menial jobs forever. You have a degree you can do better it just requires some sacrifice upfront

Good luck

mohawkchic:

Now this is more like it , grown up street style , can alreday pull of some of the looks with my wardrobe , but will steal some more ideas

Everything is a money making venture now. Next you will tell me how I can fart and make money

Let's say there is a market for kidnapping in Nigeria,what will you say if a gang of our South Africans criminals emmigrate to your country to take opportunities in kidnapping 'business' in your country?

RSA ,

not sure how you differ from my view , I am simply saying problem lies on both sides buyer and seller , equally criminal actions. Although, The kidnapping is not a good example the victim in most cases is innocent . A better example will be corrupt government practices in Nigeria and SA business men exploiting those practices to the detriment of innocent Nigerians. Can you beat your chest and say none of the SA businesses in Nigeria are  taking advantage of the lack of government regulations in Nigeria. We both have our vices.

Popeye and Louisana fried chicken are healthier than KFC !!!! at least KFC has the grilled chicken. fact of the matter is I will take homegrowm fast food chains over foreign ones . Please some one come and open a TFC in Ohio

@ poster

All you can do is assure her of your intentions , if she stays , pls dont break her heart. it will be very unfair to make her wait any longer then jilt her. You should consider it like you are already married and in it for the long run with the relationship . You simply want to formalize things and start having kids at a later age. If you can not do this please leave her alone . You have known her for 4 years , there is no changing she will do now that will differ from when you are married

there is no formula. being of the same age only complicates things when it comes to marriage . if you for instance want to wait till you are 30 to get married I am not sure she will be so obliging . Nothing wrong with getting married at 30 but the qustion will be how long have you been togerther and how much longer does she have to wait.

Both Nigerians and South Africans are to blame . some naija men will sell ice to eskimos if they can . South africa created the market the unscruplous Naijas are simply suppliers. Last time i was in SA i told all that challanged me with this situation that "Nigeria does not have a drug problem" They need to kill the demand and the supply will go away.

Interesting that all the men are on here lamenting about not being able to find love when wealthy. Na you cos am when you meet a girl you are quick to pull out the razzle dazzle to impress .

If you fly below the radar regularly you will find love , if you can not , marry your financial equal and call it a day

LOL , i die laughing , Onikaluku ni ikan ton baje ( everyone one has something they are fighting ) this sounds so trivial now but back in the day I remember my girlfriends refusing to date guys without cars

Where can i get a wedding dress steamed in Lagos??

the sad thing about that tho is that either AA or Nigerian- all are black- and maybe some of u are still in Naija self but if you have been so fortunate enough to travel abroad to US states like New Jersey, New York, Maryland, Washington, DC, then u will what am talking, I've either been to or lived in some of these states and I know what I've seen there. Many Nigerian or African men period with white women- this may make your eyes shine bright green or whatever but this is definitely a Nigerian issue and has started within the last decade- look at Pres. Obama- Mama white- daddy African- Look at Sade (the famous Jazz singer from London) moma white- daddy from Nigeria (wow) those are a few of the successful ones but to be perfectly honest here the big issue that no one may want to face is that America accepts with open arms the brothers and sisters from Africa and the women usually do good and find jobs and really help out a lot in the community, but "some" not all but still most and these men are mainly from Nigeria and are either Igbo or Yoruba- they marry either Oyinbo or Black American for papers. Now US has taken lots of measures to cut down on greencard marriages and in order to prove that the marriage is real, you have to live with the person, get joint bank accounts, file taxes together and the more, thereby making the fraud nearly impossible unless u r truly devious and can fake to the girl that u love her, and will be sleeping with her, getting her pregnant, then get your papers and leaves, that leaves behind millions of mixbreed Nigerians is the US cos it is happening in massive numbers. That is why it is getting harder and harder for African men to get greencard in US, Seems off topic but is right on target- I can't tell u the number of fatherless children in America today becos a guy from Naija pull 419 on one helpless girl to get paper, Then go abroad to call her akata and diminish her value. The shame here is that in most states "akata" culture is very similar to Nigeria- anybody know who olaudah equiano is or gustava vassa- a nigerian native taken as a slave- many southern Americanas are his descendant. There is a lot that happens in US and then the Man comes home with money and throw big party, but that money came from 419 marriage to Oyinbo abroad, just go and look at the beautiful brown sun kissed skin and broad noses that these babies have, they will be raised as akata and cos the mother may change the name after the father left u might never know u are calling your own cousin or nephew akata, this is a Nigerian issue o, I cry everytime I see it, Cos prejudice has blinded reason and logic and watered down the truth, but what will happen when all these kids want to grow up and come to Naija to see where they are from, It's gonna be a big issue one day o, and NL is the best place for this, don't u know that many if not most AA have either Cameroon or Nigerian blood running thru their veins, open your eyes the sky is not a blue in Naija as think,

valid point but seperate issue from poster, if we are talking about naijas marrying for green card , that one is not new news , both men and women do it , it is an economic choice not a racial one. The poster is talking about Black men who marry white women cos of the "attitude of black women".

As far as I am concerned when it comes to the bread and butter naija man, its more he goes home to choose a bride, rather than marry the Naija woman here cos they are to independent, no skin of my nose on that one , will not marry that kind of man anyway cos we will have nothing in common.

As for the american raised naija man marrying a white or black woman is no biggy, he was raised in a mixed society and is more likely to marry from another race because he was most likely raised in a mixed neighbourhood. Several of my relations who have lived here for a long time have their kids dating different races cos in most cases they are one of a few black kids in their high school class or college

I am negative before you ask, but I never got tested before entry, I guess it was a loosely enforced ban for non-immigrants


http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/33553409/ns/health-aids/

Not sure how this applies to Naija people. How many Naija men do you see dating white women Please dont forget this is Nairaland not a AA blog site.

BUENOS AIRES, Argentina - A 38-year-old former Miss Argentina has died from complications after undergoing cosmetic surgery on her buttocks.

Solange Magnano, a mother of twins who won the crown in 1994, died of a pulmonary embolism Sunday after three days in critical condition following a gluteoplasty in Buenos Aires.

Close friend Roberto Piazza said the procedure involved injections and the liquid "went to her lungs and brain."

"A woman who had everything lost her life to have a slightly firmer behind," he said.

Magnano's burial Monday was shown on Argentine television.

Dr. Gonzalo Cortes y Tristan said she arrived at his hospital with an acute respiratory deficiency. Her condition deteriorated until she suffered the embolism.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/34214552/ns/health-skin_and_beauty

Pls guys let's not deceive our selves, it is very very difficult for a distance relationship to last longer, it can only work if the both parties involve are very close to God and know what exactly they want in the relationship, but for guys who are sociable, i mean game guys who love the things of the world 4get it, by the time he or she fails in love with someone who is very nice and homely like the Calabar girls, there is no way the relationship can be the same, gradually communication will definitely be cut down, sometimes phones will be switch off to avoid disturbance, things that befor will be taking in good faith will not be accepted again and flimsy excuses and misunderstanding will creeps in, my advice is that if u are in a distance relationship just pray to God for your partner not to fail in love with someone far better than u both in beauty and character, if he or she does there is no way the relationship can be the same.

again immaturity , relationships that will stand the test of time will. I know of a couple now in their sixties ( actually my aunt and her husband ) , who lived seperately for 15 years while the man worked in Saudi arabia as a doctor and the woman raised her kids . At an age where other men are taking second wives and mistresses when they are in close proximity to their wives , these couple were able to do this. To be frank not all marriages or relationships will succeed , LD or otherwise .

stats are good but hardly relevant

I beg to differ , stats are very relevant when taken in context ( without going off on a tangent on how stats are important ) my point is if you are looking for a trend the fact is that LDR's dont break up or succeed at a significantly different rate from normal relationships. I think the biggest difference is that it puts a quick end to an unserious relationship, and the couple is quick to point to distance as the reason for the break up instead of the underlying immaturity that caused the break up.

Two years going strong , headed to the altar for me . But please note that this was an individual that I knew for several years prior to the LDR

kai , hopefully we will not start to have babies with two heads and dogs with two tails , I wish Naija well but we don't have a culture of Preventive maintenance