julie90:
I have been working for this company for two years. In December 2021, there was a change in management, a new manager was assigned to my Department. Before the change in management, I applied for some jobs in November 2021 but I didn't get any response.

Things between my new manager and I developed really quickly (he is not married and he is 10 years older than me). Although we have been working together, when he became the new manager we started dating. it was mutual, it wasn't like he forced me. We liked each other and we started dating in March 2022. We kept things professional in the office. Nobody in the office knows about this even till now.

Those companies I applied to in November 2021 reached out to me for an interview. I got two offers at the same time. Both offers come with great pay (similar to what my boyfriend currently earns) and a significant boost to my career. I spoke to my boyfriend about it and being my boss he told me to reject both offers, he told me he would be able to cater for my needs that the only commitment he has now is paying for his house and once he is done paying for it, he would have more money to take care of me and I didn't need a job where they would pay me what he's currently earning and be in a role similar to his.

I told him it's not the money but it would be about moving up the ladder in my career. These are offers people do not have, now I have two, he is asking me to reject them. He told me even if I have to move the only offer I should take is the one close to the company where we work which has a lower pay compared to the second offer. I told him I would go with the second offer which has more opportunities for me. Both offers are in the same state although my preferred offer is a bit far from where I live but it is still a reasonable location to commute everyday. At one point he told me, I was too ambitious and I took it as a compliment.

I noticed he changed since then, he informed the company management that I was leaving and we began the handover process, I noticed he changed after we had the discussion about me accepting the second offer but I thought it was about him missing me. May 31 was my last day and I noticed few days to my last day he was acting strange so I asked him what the matter was. He said he doesn't feel anything for me and we should stop seeing each other.

This is a man that was really excited when we were dating, all of a sudden doesn't feel anything for me because I got a high paying job? Is it wrong for a woman to be ambitious? When has it become a crime for a woman to aim high in her career? My role will still be to support him. I have never been rude to him and I am not going to be rude to him because we now earn the same salary. I really like him and I feel disappointed that he could act this way.

Is it now a crime for a woman to be ambitious?

Chai

It is well

Thanks for your kind words...

Kobojunkie:
1. Stop dating men with low self-esteem issues.

2. So what if he thinks it is wrong for a woman to be ambitious? Are you so going to end your ambitions for his sake? Do you think so low of yourself as an individual?,

3. Why do you care what anyone else thinks of you as a woman aiming high in your career?

4. Look! You dodged a bullet. Be happy!

I understand you are may be heartbroken, but the truth is you were dating an immature boy, who had no desire to see you flourish in life is what. Thankfully, he pulled himself out of the run. Now you know what you know to avoid in a next partner.

Thanks for your kind words...

Channah1:
Dont mind him he's got complex issues. Let him deal with it and get over himself.

Don't ever lose yourself worth or any great opportunity coming your way because of a man. Men are not loyal and if you dance to his tune now just because of marriage, he'll want to dominate you in that marriage and prevent you from becoming successful so you won't measure up to
him in life. That way, he can keep you as his puppet to be at his mercy forever; under his control.

He may even end up not marrying you and by then you'll have lost a one time opportunity.

Your career is your life after God. Hold on to it, let him get lost! Men are not worth sacrificing anything for. You'll only end up in regrets.

Any man with such mentality is a disaster waiting to happen and is not worth having around.

Inferiority complex is his problem. Just move on

You dodged a huge bullet, sever all forms of communication from that dream killer. Men like that will financially incapacitate their wives so they can misbehave and treat her anyhow.

Lol.... It's normal for bride price to be expensive, that's a way to value what we have. Maybe I can pay in installments.
Good morning

julie90:
Lol.... thanks for your kind words and yes, my bride price is very expensive

julie90:
I have been working for this company for two years. In December 2021, there was a change in management, a new manager was assigned to my Department. Before the change in management, I applied for some jobs in November 2021 but I didn't get any response.

Things between my new manager and I developed really quickly (he is not married and he is 10 years older than me). Although we have been working together, when he became the new manager we started dating. it was mutual, it wasn't like he forced me. We liked each other and we started dating in March 2022. We kept things professional in the office. Nobody in the office knows about this even till now.

Those companies I applied to in November 2021 reached out to me for an interview. I got two offers at the same time. Both offers come with great pay (similar to what my boyfriend currently earns) and a significant boost to my career. I spoke to my boyfriend about it and being my boss he told me to reject both offers, he told me he would be able to cater for my needs that the only commitment he has now is paying for his house and once he is done paying for it, he would have more money to take care of me and I didn't need a job where they would pay me what he's currently earning and be in a role similar to his.

I told him it's not the money but it would be about moving up the ladder in my career. These are offers people do not have, now I have two, he is asking me to reject them. He told me even if I have to move the only offer I should take is the one close to the company where we work which has a lower pay compared to the second offer. I told him I would go with the second offer which has more opportunities for me. Both offers are in the same state although my preferred offer is a bit far from where I live but it is still a reasonable location to commute everyday. At one point he told me, I was too ambitious and I took it as a compliment.

I noticed he changed since then, he informed the company management that I was leaving and we began the handover process, I noticed he changed after we had the discussion about me accepting the second offer but I thought it was about him missing me. May 31 was my last day and I noticed few days to my last day he was acting strange so I asked him what the matter was. He said he doesn't feel anything for me and we should stop seeing each other.

This is a man that was really excited when we were dating, all of a sudden doesn't feel anything for me because I got a high paying job? Is it wrong for a woman to be ambitious? When has it become a crime for a woman to aim high in her career? My role will still be to support him. I have never been rude to him and I am not going to be rude to him because we now earn the same salary. I really like him and I feel disappointed that he could act this way.

Is it now a crime for a woman to be ambitious?

I need a woman like you. Can we date?

julie90:
It's unfortunate that I don't have the right words for you right now...

You don`t have to reply me anything. Just continue with your career, you`ll be fine.

You should sit him down and talk it over

julie90:
Thanks for your kind words...

You're welcome.

You have to find a trade off between your career and your life, don't sacrifice your life because of your career or you might wake up one day 40 years with no kids. You are a woman you have a biological clock. If you are in your 30s your chances of finding a high value man or the man of your dream diminishes by 50 percent from when your are in your 20s you might have to settle for less and that's where marital problems start, thinking you should have had better. Don't ever sacrifice your life because of a career is not worth it at the end . Good luck

It is because of men like you that the world is still the way it is. This is the 21st century and a man is still bragging, " I can't marry a woman who is more ambitious".

It is men like you that will end up getting married to women with no ambition and when irritated, you get a divorce and start looking for an ambitious woman to marry.

What's wrong in getting married to a woman who is more ambitious, as long as you she respects you and fulfills her responsibilities as your wife.

Your mindset is weak... sorry

Mikester:
I agree with him. It isn't low self esteem or whatever a pained mind chooses to term it. It is doing what you feel is right. He has his reason for leaving you. There was no love between you both in the first place. It was just casual dating which I personally deem to have no value.

I personally cannot marry a more ambitious lady because I know what marriage entails and that different minds cannot run a home successfully. Either she unites with me exclusively and follow my lead as a real woman should or she moves on. Else, why do we term ourselves as one body?

We all make decisions based on what we know and what we feel. He knows why he left you and no one here has the right to criticize him on that, besides I'm certain a lot who are criticising him here are the actual failures in the real world, hence the bitterness.

CryptoClub2018:


I need a woman like you. Can we date?

So that you can be collecting loan?

Ur boyfriend is mad, he is just jealous of ur progress
Earning more than him doesn't make him any less a man as long as he is doing his duty.

My dear, you have got your life to live enjoy ur career progress
U will meet a sensible person.

Eprincess:
It is because of men like you that the world is still the way it is. This is the 21st century and a man is still bragging, " I can't marry a woman who is more ambitious".

It is men like you that will end up getting married to women with no ambition and when irritated, you get a divorce and start looking for an ambitious woman to marry.

What's wrong in getting married to a woman who is more ambitious, as long as you she respects you and fulfills her responsibilities as your wife.

Your mindset is weak... sorry

Sorry if you feel bad dear but I said what I said and I do know what I am talking about more than you assume.

What do you know about me anyway?

What do you know about anything?

Kobojunkie:
You mean your current girlfriend has several other boyfriends and you are ok with it?

2. Does you also discuss with her the fact that you are also seeing other people at the same time?

3. If she had come on here to tell of how one of her many boyfriends had abandoned her, are you telling us, you wouldn't be among those who would have immediately cast her as a wh0re?

You clearly don’t know what ‘dating’ means.

Eprincess:


So that you can be collecting loan?

No. Not because of money

Thatwasepic:
You have to find a trade off between your career and your life, don't sacrifice your life because of your career or you might wake up one day 40 years with no kids. You are a woman you have a biological clock. If you are in your 30s your chances of finding a high value man or the man of your dream diminishes by 50 percent from when your are in your 20s you might have to settle for less and that's where marital problems start, thinking you should have had better. Don't ever sacrifice your life because of a career is not worth it at the end . Good luck

LOL

See those frustrated nairaland babes trying to recruit Op to their toxic lonely life

Babygirl Op better leave that man, he doesn't have your interest from his heart, stop pleasing him in exchange of getting a high paying job..

Channah1:
Dont mind him he's got complex issues. Let him deal with it and get over himself.

Don't ever lose yourself worth or any great opportunity coming your way because of a man. Men are not loyal and if you dance to his tune now just because of marriage, he'll want to dominate you in that marriage and prevent you from becoming successful so you won't measure up to
him in life. That way, he can keep you as his puppet to be at his mercy forever; under his control.

He may even end up not marrying you and by then you'll have lost a one time opportunity.

Your career is your life after God. Hold on to it, let him get lost! Men are not worth sacrificing anything for. You'll only end up in regrets.

Any man with such mentality is a disaster waiting to happen and is not worth having around.

@bold:

You need a renewal of the mind.

I however align with your position on this matter: it is good riddance to bad rubbish.

HopeNeverDies:
Damnnn!!!! It’s not a Crime but Apparently, Some men do not like it when their wives or Gf got a job paying higher than his. It’s about respect of choice. Same way, if definitely you’ve had the opportunity to use iPhone 13 and your boyfriend still uses 7+, and u decided to settle for 6+ or 6s+ , it’s not that you’re stupid or some, but you just chose respect over your relationship....


Damnnnn!!! I feel his feelings

@bold:

A joke right?

bukky1994:
You should sit him down and talk it over

Namesake, this is not the kind of thing you talk over.

You hear it, enter room and ka halleluya meje.

Olorun ti fi oju ota han.

Imagine, o se so eleyi after Igbeyawo.

Baby yen wo gawu niyen.

Mikester:
I agree with him. It isn't low self esteem or whatever a pained mind chooses to term it. It is doing what you feel is right. He has his reason for leaving you. There was no love between you both in the first place. It was just casual dating which I personally deem to have no value.

I personally cannot marry a more ambitious lady because I know what marriage entails and that different minds cannot run a home successfully. Either she unites with me exclusively and follow my lead as a real woman should or she moves on. Else, why do we term ourselves as one body?

We all make decisions based on what we know and what we feel. He knows why he left you and no one here has the right to criticize him on that, besides I'm certain a lot who are criticising him here are the actual failures in the real world, hence the bitterness.

@bold
1. What does marriage entail to you?

2. Except you both have 'equal' ambitions, there is already a different mind.

3. Unity: a man leaves her parents & cleaves to his parents. That's what makes them one. In essence, the unity is from both ends (both of you bring parts of yourselves to form a new whole).

Not one person standing as King Kong and waiting for the other person to join.

Eprincess:


So that you can be collecting loan?

Can we both start dating

julie90:
I have been working for this company for two years. In December 2021, there was a change in management, a new manager was assigned to my Department. Before the change in management, I applied for some jobs in November 2021 but I didn't get any response.

Things between my new manager and I developed really quickly (he is not married and he is 10 years older than me). Although we have been working together, when he became the new manager we started dating. it was mutual, it wasn't like he forced me. We liked each other and we started dating in March 2022. We kept things professional in the office. Nobody in the office knows about this even till now.

Those companies I applied to in November 2021 reached out to me for an interview. I got two offers at the same time. Both offers come with great pay (similar to what my boyfriend currently earns) and a significant boost to my career. I spoke to my boyfriend about it and being my boss he told me to reject both offers, he told me he would be able to cater for my needs that the only commitment he has now is paying for his house and once he is done paying for it, he would have more money to take care of me and I didn't need a job where they would pay me what he's currently earning and be in a role similar to his.

I told him it's not the money but it would be about moving up the ladder in my career. These are offers people do not have, now I have two, he is asking me to reject them. He told me even if I have to move the only offer I should take is the one close to the company where we work which has a lower pay compared to the second offer. I told him I would go with the second offer which has more opportunities for me. Both offers are in the same state although my preferred offer is a bit far from where I live but it is still a reasonable location to commute everyday. At one point he told me, I was too ambitious and I took it as a compliment.

I noticed he changed since then, he informed the company management that I was leaving and we began the handover process, I noticed he changed after we had the discussion about me accepting the second offer but I thought it was about him missing me. May 31 was my last day and I noticed few days to my last day he was acting strange so I asked him what the matter was. He said he doesn't feel anything for me and we should stop seeing each other.

This is a man that was really excited when we were dating, all of a sudden doesn't feel anything for me because I got a high paying job? Is it wrong for a woman to be ambitious? When has it become a crime for a woman to aim high in her career? My role will still be to support him. I have never been rude to him and I am not going to be rude to him because we now earn the same salary. I really like him and I feel disappointed that he could act this way.

Is it now a crime for a woman to be ambitious?

this life ehn...and I'm here looking for a woman that works

julie90:
I have been working for this company for two years. In December 2021, there was a change in management, a new manager was assigned to my Department. Before the change in management, I applied for some jobs in November 2021 but I didn't get any response.

Things between my new manager and I developed really quickly (he is not married and he is 10 years older than me). Although we have been working together, when he became the new manager we started dating. it was mutual, it wasn't like he forced me. We liked each other and we started dating in March 2022. We kept things professional in the office. Nobody in the office knows about this even till now.

Those companies I applied to in November 2021 reached out to me for an interview. I got two offers at the same time. Both offers come with great pay (similar to what my boyfriend currently earns) and a significant boost to my career. I spoke to my boyfriend about it and being my boss he told me to reject both offers, he told me he would be able to cater for my needs that the only commitment he has now is paying for his house and once he is done paying for it, he would have more money to take care of me and I didn't need a job where they would pay me what he's currently earning and be in a role similar to his.

I told him it's not the money but it would be about moving up the ladder in my career. These are offers people do not have, now I have two, he is asking me to reject them. He told me even if I have to move the only offer I should take is the one close to the company where we work which has a lower pay compared to the second offer. I told him I would go with the second offer which has more opportunities for me. Both offers are in the same state although my preferred offer is a bit far from where I live but it is still a reasonable location to commute everyday. At one point he told me, I was too ambitious and I took it as a compliment.

I noticed he changed since then, he informed the company management that I was leaving and we began the handover process, I noticed he changed after we had the discussion about me accepting the second offer but I thought it was about him missing me. May 31 was my last day and I noticed few days to my last day he was acting strange so I asked him what the matter was. He said he doesn't feel anything for me and we should stop seeing each other.

This is a man that was really excited when we were dating, all of a sudden doesn't feel anything for me because I got a high paying job? Is it wrong for a woman to be ambitious? When has it become a crime for a woman to aim high in her career? My role will still be to support him. I have never been rude to him and I am not going to be rude to him because we now earn the same salary. I really like him and I feel disappointed that he could act this way.

Is it now a crime for a woman to be ambitious?

Julie90, look ahead and don't ever look back.

If your submission here is truly the truth, you should be happy that a man who has not conquered himself (or has never meant well for you) but wishes to conquer you has moved out of your life. A man who is sure of himself will not try to conquer you; instead, he will strive to conquer himself without striving to conquer you and love you without hating himself.

There is nothing wrong with a lady that is ambitious because that will not stop her from striving to place principle above expediency if she has always been from strong ethical leanings, but there is everything wrong with a lady that is greedy because she will always place expediency above principle.

DaInferno:
this life ehn...and I'm here looking for a woman that works

You are looking for a woman that works or a woman that is ambitious?

Her working is clearly not the issue as they met at work;

He has issues with her growth.

julie90:
I have been working for this company for two years. In December 2021, there was a change in management, a new manager was assigned to my Department. Before the change in management, I applied for some jobs in November 2021 but I didn't get any response.

Things between my new manager and I developed really quickly (he is not married and he is 10 years older than me). Although we have been working together, when he became the new manager we started dating. it was mutual, it wasn't like he forced me. We liked each other and we started dating in March 2022. We kept things professional in the office. Nobody in the office knows about this even till now.

Those companies I applied to in November 2021 reached out to me for an interview. I got two offers at the same time. Both offers come with great pay (similar to what my boyfriend currently earns) and a significant boost to my career. I spoke to my boyfriend about it and being my boss he told me to reject both offers, he told me he would be able to cater for my needs that the only commitment he has now is paying for his house and once he is done paying for it, he would have more money to take care of me and I didn't need a job where they would pay me what he's currently earning and be in a role similar to his.

I told him it's not the money but it would be about moving up the ladder in my career. These are offers people do not have, now I have two, he is asking me to reject them. He told me even if I have to move the only offer I should take is the one close to the company where we work which has a lower pay compared to the second offer. I told him I would go with the second offer which has more opportunities for me. Both offers are in the same state although my preferred offer is a bit far from where I live but it is still a reasonable location to commute everyday. At one point he told me, I was too ambitious and I took it as a compliment.

I noticed he changed since then, he informed the company management that I was leaving and we began the handover process, I noticed he changed after we had the discussion about me accepting the second offer but I thought it was about him missing me. May 31 was my last day and I noticed few days to my last day he was acting strange so I asked him what the matter was. He said he doesn't feel anything for me and we should stop seeing each other.

This is a man that was really excited when we were dating, all of a sudden doesn't feel anything for me because I got a high paying job? Is it wrong for a woman to be ambitious? When has it become a crime for a woman to aim high in her career? My role will still be to support him. I have never been rude to him and I am not going to be rude to him because we now earn the same salary. I really like him and I feel disappointed that he could act this way.

Is it now a crime for a woman to be ambitious?

There is no key to happiness,the door is always open..pls don't let anyone take that away from you.

Keep moving and allow him deal with his complex fever..time waits for nowhere.

Eprincess:
It is because of men like you that the world is still the way it is. This is the 21st century and a man is still bragging, " I can't marry a woman who is more ambitious".

It is men like you that will end up getting married to women with no ambition and when irritated, you get a divorce and start looking for an ambitious woman to marry.

What's wrong in getting married to a woman who is more ambitious, as long as you she respects you and fulfills her responsibilities as your wife.

Your mindset is weak... sorry

Respect "choices"!!!

Let him go and move on

Being under him makes monitoring you easier for him. He is insecure lol.