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Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? - Romance (4) - Nairaland

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Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by RealGandalf: 10:45pm On Nov 13, 2022
I will say, do not lose your virginity yet. No need for that at the moment.

Wait at least till you are engaged or probably married.

It pays. Trust me, it does.

Cheers!
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by chris51(f): 10:46pm On Nov 13, 2022
FromOuterSpace:
Girl, listen to me and listen very well.

1. You're 19. Not only should you still be a virgin at 19, but you should keep your virginity for as long as you can. You've only been dating this man for 7-months, and the fact that you're going back and forth about it means you're not ready, so don't do it. Even if you're sure about it, don't do it now or anytime soon.

2. You have no business dating a 34-year old. You're 19. Find a guy in his 20s to date, not someone 15-years older than you. Quite frankly, it's sickening of him to be preying after someone 15-years his junior. It's giving perversion and pedophilia.

3. You're asking if you should have sex with him and hope he'll marry you thereafter. Sweetheart, that is foolishness. A smart lady doesn't move like that. Why buy the cow when he can get the milk for free? Nigeria has enough single mothers already and many are in their 20s. Please don't become a statistic.

4. A man who loves you will wait until after marriage. He will marry you first, especially if you're a virgin. Point. Blank. Period. One thing I liked about my ex, even though he was a cheater (because I didn't want to sleep with him and why I eventually broke up with him and have no regrets about it) is that he never pressured me for sex and always said he would wait until after marriage. If a man has any ounce of love for you, that's what he will tell you and he most definitely will not pressure you for sex. No man who has ever truly loved a woman has asked her to sleep with him without/before marriage. That is not love, but lust.

5. The fact that he's having sexual discussions with you and telling you these things when your discussions should revolve around you finishing your studies or anything uplifting are enough to know this your relationship is lust-based and he's only pleasure-seeking.


Perfect advice. Nothing to add.
Good job. I hope the innocent girl will listen. Why can't the 34 year old man look for his mate?

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Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by chris51(f): 10:46pm On Nov 13, 2022
chris51:



Perfect advice. Nothing to add.
Good job. I hope the innocent girl will listen. Why can't the 34 year old man look for his mate?
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by friendl: 10:50pm On Nov 13, 2022
Don't know what you waiting for??sex is sweet ,...enjoy yourself
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by jubrilELsudan: 10:51pm On Nov 13, 2022
I FOR LIKE FVCK YOU

Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Kingcalls: 10:51pm On Nov 13, 2022
Octopusssy:

He is a hoodlum cheesy

Op, let him go and look for his mate biko.

I'm sure u were asking those that celebrated Regina and Nwoko

1 Like

Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by greggng: 10:52pm On Nov 13, 2022
Bloommax:

Wonderful evening to y'all.

I just discovered Nairaland few weeks ago and I've read so many informative things and people's story. Some get advised and some get bashed when they drop their stories here, I hope I wouldn't.

Let me cut to the chase.

I'm 19, I'm a virgin and I'm a 300lvl student. I have a boyfriend that is 15years older than I am and he's sexually active. We met on online. We've known each other for seven months. We both love each other really well, even with the ups and downs that we've had in our relationship. This relationship is a long distance relationship. Now the thing is my boyfriend who is sexually active hasn't had sex for almost a year and lately he's been craving for sex. Sometimes I'll tell him I'm ready to have sex and other times I change my mind because of fear. I've been undecided about having sex. I thought about having sex with him maybe it'll make our bond stronger. He isn't married, he has no kids but he says he wish to marry me as soon as I graduate from the university. To be a virgin in a university isn't easy, there are temptations everywhere. Sometimes I get so tired of being a virgin and just want to have sex but other times I just want to keep it. One of my friends who is also my age had sex in 2019 and she has been sexually active ever since, she told me sex with males aren't really worth it, that if I'm ready I should try having sex with my gender because it's freaky.

I need advice please, should I have sex with this guy and hope that he'll marry me. Or I shouldn't and just be patient. He coming to meet me in two weeks time.




Make sure he uses a big dick so that you can enjoy it very well ..you are naive..in my ppa I.met a lady of 25 years ...she was still a virgin ..she said she will give me whatever I ask of her cos she can trust me ..but I didn't do it cos there are curses attach to having sex with virgin ..wise men stay away From it . A virgin is suppose to marry the man that deflowered her .cos any man you have sex with is your husband in the spiritual world . Keep your virginity is your dignity . Tell the man you can only give her sex on your wedding day . Pls don't deceive him if you know u are not a virgin . Cos anyway he discovers..
He will Bleep hell of you and dump u where you belong . Face your studies...u ate still young ..dating someone 15 years older than u ..think again
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by beelon1020(m): 10:54pm On Nov 13, 2022
OP!.. abeg no fall for that scam that guy dey give you... please stay out of premarital sex, it’s very dangerous, why not wait and give that golden price of dignity for your future hubby?.. in less than 4years you will get there... a big pride for you and your family on your wedding night.. please wait... your hubby will surely respect you a lot for keep it for him... God help you in waiting and resisting all form of temptations...
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Emekaterry: 10:58pm On Nov 13, 2022
Before u go into sin think well oo.remember that a prayer of a virgin is with a great effect.
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Sunshine34(m): 11:00pm On Nov 13, 2022
Don't trust a long distance relationship.
He's only trying to take advantage of you, to hammer your plate.
That he has not bleeped for several months is a big lie, don't give in to his sweet words.
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Hsurdbespoke: 11:02pm On Nov 13, 2022
why buy the cow when you can get the milk free
op think very well
message from big bro
the guy is trying to manipulate you into having sex especially the guy you meet online
my 10% advice
*tell him to fast to reduce the urge for 20minutes nack or come and marry you from your parent then he continue sponsoring your education
my wife is a virgin till after our marriage,this virginity builds trust between us for the past 10years
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Treasuredgift(f): 11:03pm On Nov 13, 2022
Konjiboii:


What ever you decide OP don't listen to this guy, just because he wants to have sex with you doesn't mean he is a bad person, he only wants to know how committed you are in the relationship.

Also the age difference shouldn't be an issue as long as he genuinely wants to marry you, matter of fact you are just the perfect age for a 35yrs old man, since you've passed the threshold of 18.


Do not wait after marriage before you engage in sex with him, know what you are getting in right now before you make such a huge decision.


Enjoy your life and dont let anyone dictate for you,wrong or right.

You are talking in the nonsense, bro!!!
I was so disgusted reading this.
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Segzy19: 11:04pm On Nov 13, 2022
Take this advice. This is what you need...
You do otherwise, it's at your own risk and damage.


Nothing more to say



FromOuterSpace:
Girl, listen to me and listen very well.

1. You're 19. Not only should you still be a virgin at 19, but you should keep your virginity for as long as you can. You've only been dating this man for 7-months, and the fact that you're going back and forth about it means you're not ready, so don't do it. Even if you're sure about it, don't do it now or anytime soon.

2. You have no business dating a 34-year old. You're 19. Find a guy in his 20s to date, not someone 15-years older than you. Quite frankly, it's sickening of him to be preying after someone 15-years his junior. It's giving perversion and pedophilia.

3. You're asking if you should have sex with him and hope he'll marry you thereafter. Sweetheart, that is foolishness. A smart lady doesn't move like that. Why buy the cow when he can get the milk for free? Nigeria has enough single mothers already and many are in their 20s. Please don't become a statistic.

4. A man who loves you will wait until after marriage. He will marry you first, especially if you're a virgin. Point. Blank. Period. One thing I liked about my ex, even though he was a cheater (because I didn't want to sleep with him and why I eventually broke up with him and have no regrets about it) is that he never pressured me for sex and always said he would wait until after marriage. If a man has any ounce of love for you, that's what he will tell you and he most definitely will not pressure you for sex. No man who has ever truly loved a woman has asked her to sleep with him without/before marriage. That is not love, but lust.

5. The fact that he's having sexual discussions with you and telling you these things when your discussions should revolve around you finishing your studies or anything uplifting are enough to know this your relationship is lust-based and he's only pleasure-seeking.

1 Like

Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Blizzfull123: 11:09pm On Nov 13, 2022
[left][/left]please don't do it, and also look for a way to quit that relationship,that guy has no good intentions
Bloommax:

Wonderful evening to y'all.

I just discovered Nairaland few weeks ago and I've read so many informative things and people's story. Some get advised and some get bashed when they drop their stories here, I hope I wouldn't.

Let me cut to the chase.

I'm 19, I'm a virgin and I'm a 300lvl student. I have a boyfriend that is 15years older than I am and he's sexually active. We met on online. We've known each other for seven months. We both love each other really well, even with the ups and downs that we've had in our relationship. This relationship is a long distance relationship. Now the thing is my boyfriend who is sexually active hasn't had sex for almost a year and lately he's been craving for sex. Sometimes I'll tell him I'm ready to have sex and other times I change my mind because of fear. I've been undecided about having sex. I thought about having sex with him maybe it'll make our bond stronger. He isn't married, he has no kids but he says he wish to marry me as soon as I graduate from the university. To be a virgin in a university isn't easy, there are temptations everywhere. Sometimes I get so tired of being a virgin and just want to have sex but other times I just want to keep it. One of my friends who is also my age had sex in 2019 and she has been sexually active ever since, she told me sex with males aren't really worth it, that if I'm ready I should try having sex with my gender because it's freaky.

I need advice please, should I have sex with this guy and hope that he'll marry me. Or I shouldn't and just be patient. He coming to meet me in two weeks time.



Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Wilddove(m): 11:14pm On Nov 13, 2022
The word 'sex' appeared more than ten times in your write-up which indicates that you really want it. @19 You 're still a teen, focus on your studies and forget abt sex.
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by litaninja(m): 11:17pm On Nov 13, 2022
You're 19. An adult. The clowns screaming pedophilia don't know the meaning.
Make your decision as you like. lol

Bloommax:

Wonderful evening to y'all.

I just discovered Nairaland few weeks ago and I've read so many informative things and people's story. Some get advised and some get bashed when they drop their stories here, I hope I wouldn't.

Let me cut to the chase.

I'm 19, I'm a virgin and I'm a 300lvl student. I have a boyfriend that is 15years older than I am and he's sexually active. We met on online. We've known each other for seven months. We both love each other really well, even with the ups and downs that we've had in our relationship. This relationship is a long distance relationship. Now the thing is my boyfriend who is sexually active hasn't had sex for almost a year and lately he's been craving for sex. Sometimes I'll tell him I'm ready to have sex and other times I change my mind because of fear. I've been undecided about having sex. I thought about having sex with him maybe it'll make our bond stronger. He isn't married, he has no kids but he says he wish to marry me as soon as I graduate from the university. To be a virgin in a university isn't easy, there are temptations everywhere. Sometimes I get so tired of being a virgin and just want to have sex but other times I just want to keep it. One of my friends who is also my age had sex in 2019 and she has been sexually active ever since, she told me sex with males aren't really worth it, that if I'm ready I should try having sex with my gender because it's freaky.

I need advice please, should I have sex with this guy and hope that he'll marry me. Or I shouldn't and just be patient. He coming to meet me in two weeks time.



Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by tuzle(m): 11:23pm On Nov 13, 2022
My own is that if u still plan on losing your virginity after all the advice u got here, just find someone your own age or someone not too older than u and desist from that online 34years old man who just want to use u. I am sure that guys head will spark if his 19year old sister was discussing about sex and marriage with a 34years old man while still in school.
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Sweetvie: 11:24pm On Nov 13, 2022
Smile... @op if you believe that 34 yr old guy will marry you lol you're on your own cool
But, wait o those marriage code still dey work? grin
They've bobo op grin grin
@19 I don't see any reason why you should give urself to a guy bcoz he is sexually active... He know where to get them.
Finally, wo there's nothing like marriage smiley
Look for someone around ur age to date and don't easily give out ur virginity... Most guys doesn't worth it. When they get what dey want they'll dump you smiley
Anyway, follow your heart. Do what you want or what you think it's the best smiley

Cheers! cheesy
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Nobody: 11:25pm On Nov 13, 2022
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Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Ade1759: 11:28pm On Nov 13, 2022
Google "there are two wolves"

If you don't have sense at least you want to learn..


19 yrs Kwa?.... If you held your virginity that long then just wait till 22yrs.... you'll would have conquered all types of temptation by then...and then be illuminated enough moving forward.
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Corto: 11:29pm On Nov 13, 2022
Bloommax:

Wonderful evening to y'all.

I just discovered Nairaland few weeks ago and I've read so many informative things and people's story. Some get advised and some get bashed when they drop their stories here, I hope I wouldn't.

Let me cut to the chase.

I'm 19, I'm a virgin and I'm a 300lvl student. I have a boyfriend that is 15years older than I am and he's sexually active. We met on online. We've known each other for seven months. We both love each other really well, even with the ups and downs that we've had in our relationship. This relationship is a long distance relationship. Now the thing is my boyfriend who is sexually active hasn't had sex for almost a year and lately he's been craving for sex. Sometimes I'll tell him I'm ready to have sex and other times I change my mind because of fear. I've been undecided about having sex. I thought about having sex with him maybe it'll make our bond stronger. He isn't married, he has no kids but he says he wish to marry me as soon as I graduate from the university. To be a virgin in a university isn't easy, there are temptations everywhere. Sometimes I get so tired of being a virgin and just want to have sex but other times I just want to keep it. One of my friends who is also my age had sex in 2019 and she has been sexually active ever since, she told me sex with males aren't really worth it, that if I'm ready I should try having sex with my gender because it's freaky.

I need advice please, should I have sex with this guy and hope that he'll marry me. Or I shouldn't and just be patient. He coming to meet me in two weeks time.




Don't do it with that guy, he won't marry you! Once he taste your puna he'll be gone

Send me a dm instead & let me teach you a thing or two about relationship & great sex
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by johnfem321: 11:35pm On Nov 13, 2022
Lol you expect a 34years old single
Man to marry a 34years old woman.. where is it done? It’s best women settle down early Latest by 22years… there is absolutely nothing wrong with 34years dating a 19years old.. Her age mate at 19years will Only waste her youthful years + infection, disease and breakfast.. a 34years will be more ready for married than just dating her for fun.. OP be careful of 35years old virgin in there parent house advising you.. No need to rush things but don’t take the advice literally.. you are not a baby .. you are a woman.. you will be a graduate in couple of years.. hopefully get married in a few years.. there is nothing wrong in you dating a 34years old if he has good intentions..
chris51:



Perfect advice. Nothing to add.
Good job. I hope the innocent girl will listen. Why can't the 34 year old man look for his mate?

1 Like

Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by ZINNYBANKS: 11:35pm On Nov 13, 2022
A Virgin at 19 shocked op post ur picture first.
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Monday60655(m): 11:37pm On Nov 13, 2022
FromOuterSpace:
Girl, listen to me and listen very well.

1. You're 19. Not only should you still be a virgin at 19, but you should keep your virginity for as long as you can. You've only been dating this man for 7-months, and the fact that you're going back and forth about it means you're not ready, so don't do it. Even if you're sure about it, don't do it now or anytime soon.

2. You have no business dating a 34-year old. You're 19. Find a guy in his 20s to date, not someone 15-years older than you. Quite frankly, it's sickening of him to be preying after someone 15-years his junior. It's giving perversion and pedophilia.

3. You're asking if you should have sex with him and hope he'll marry you thereafter. Sweetheart, that is foolishness. A smart lady doesn't move like that. Why buy the cow when he can get the milk for free? Nigeria has enough single mothers already and many are in their 20s. Please don't become a statistic.

4. A man who loves you will wait until after marriage. He will marry you first, especially if you're a virgin. Point. Blank. Period. One thing I liked about my ex, even though he was a cheater (because I didn't want to sleep with him and why I eventually broke up with him and have no regrets about it) is that he never pressured me for sex and always said he would wait until after marriage. If a man has any ounce of love for you, that's what he will tell you and he most definitely will not pressure you for sex. No man who has ever truly loved a woman has asked her to sleep with him without/before marriage. That is not love, but lust.

5. The fact that he's having sexual discussions with you and telling you these things when your discussions should revolve around you finishing your studies or anything uplifting are enough to know this your relationship is lust-based and he's only pleasure-seeking.
If not that this person is an attention seeker, I would have said that you nailed it on the head.
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by ejieddy: 11:37pm On Nov 13, 2022
1) Sex with this guy will not make your bond stronger. Rather, it will make you bound to him emotionally and spiritually. The spiritual implications is more and worse.

2) it's normal for a human being to crave for sex. That's what makes you human. But being able to control that craving is what differentiates us from animals.

3) I can guarantee you that what still keeps your relationship is the fact that this man hasn't had sex with you yet. The curiosity and the desire for it still drives him. Don't lose that. You are not punishing him by not giving him sex, you are keeping yours and his sanity, sanctity and integrity. If you lose this, your relationship is as good as dead.

4) When a man has sex with a lady he wants to marry and isn't married to yet, there's nothing to look forward to again. When I was courting my wife, one of the things that motivated me, apart from God's word was that one day, I'll get the opportunity to be one with her in flesh (sex) but I wanted that to be in marriage. We both wanted that and God helped us. So, put it in your mind that sex for you will only be within the boundaries of marriage.

5) Also, this sex thing, as beautiful as it is, is actually very overrated. You get tired of it eventually. So why give up a gift God has given you for something you will have abundance of in marriage and even get tired of it?

6) Your friend is a liar. Sex with the right man is enjoyable and worth it. But when you do it wrong, it becomes an addiction that you will need more crazy things to quench that addiction. That's where your friend is at the moment

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by olisaEze(m): 11:39pm On Nov 13, 2022
What are you saving it for, the rainy day? Go to him and get laid joor! He’s 34 yrs old, sexually active and has not had sex because of u?? LoL, na real small pikin u be! grin Do it not because of luv, but because experience matters. Whether u give it up now or later, it has no bearing on how happy ure going to be in marriage. That is if u don’t goan have unwanted pregnancy before u get sense! grin


ejieddy:


5) Also, this sex thing, is actually very overrated. You get tired of it eventually.

Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Monday60655(m): 11:45pm On Nov 13, 2022
Bible said that marriage is honourable with bed undefiled. I Corinthians 6:18 said free fornication. Every sin a man committed is without his body, but he that committed fornication sin against his own body.
If not that you are an attention seeker, I would have asked you with all these red flag, yet you are here asking these childish questions.

1 Like

Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by frankson1(m): 11:57pm On Nov 13, 2022
adebayour26:
You should be thankful to God great people flooded your thread to guide you om the right path.
@richy4
@FromOuterSpace
@Blakjewelry
@toobusy
#Octopussy
These people have given you the best advices that you need. I think a word is enough for the wise.

My fear with this generation is just that, after all these advices, you might still end up doing what's on your mind.




Your last paragraph is just perfect.

I CAN NEVER AND WILL NEVER ADVICE ANY KID WHO IS ALREADY THINKING ABOUT SEX NOT TO HAVE SEX BECAUSE IT IS TIME WASTING.


I let them know about the possible dangers involved in engaging in sex and having an unsafe sex.
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by chloride6: 11:59pm On Nov 13, 2022
Leave that your bf alone
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by Papafada: 12:05am On Nov 14, 2022
My beloved sis know dis n hv peace even if na aero plane u wan buy u go test am start d engine n check proper property dats how we role grin grin grin grin grin
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by jimcaddy(m): 12:06am On Nov 14, 2022
My advice to you, face your studies and graduate. Once you start having secs with this guy, trust me, problem will start.
Re: Is It Right For Me To Be Sexually Active Now? by advanceDNA: 12:08am On Nov 14, 2022
Bloommax:
It isn't. All I need is the right advice.

Watever u decision is...know jointly don...its not a a pair of jeans or 1k u dash someone..so dont do it for him....do it for yourself when u are ready and feel like u want to start what ur father and mother does.......... because the consequences is urs to bear.....even if he doesnt marry u and when the body count starts to stack up

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