₦airaland Forum

henrylowe:
Very hilarious experience you've got up there Tosyne. Let me also share mine since there's nothing to be ashamed about

I dated this lady for a few months but the only barrier to effective display of our love in Tokyo was the fact that her parents were unnecessarily being strict which prevented us from having the opportunity to see each other but did more of phone conversation. In fact, I dare not visit her and even when she managed to sneak of the house to visit me, she would be very conscious of time for the fear of being scolded if her parents ever found her missing in the house.

One day, on a Friday to be precise, she called me to come and sleep over at her place as her parents were going for a vigil. As a sharp guy now, I smiled to God for answering my prayer. I went to the bathroom, got dressed and also lied to my own parents that I was also going for a vigil, I was granted amnesty by money dad and I headed to her place around 11pm. The whole show started for couple of minutes after which we both slept off (I don't expect anybody to ask me what the show was )

When it was around 4am, there was a knock on the door that was when I knew he was in deep mess. Her parent came earlier than expected. Ordinarily, according to her, she assured me that her parents would not return back until past 5am, but this time I guess things went out of hand.

After few minutes of discombobation on where to hide, I decided to hide beneath the curtain of the toilet located in the axis of the sitting room so that I would quietly sneak out through the main door as soon as they enter into their room. As God will have His way, I successfully hid there, she went to the door, open it and greeted her them. I heard her father playfully told her she no dey use sleep play and all that. She was heading back to her room when calamity happened

Her mother went straight into their room as her father headed towards the toilet to pee before going in with his wife. Seee gbege !!! Before I could say Jack, her father opened the curtain of the toilet and caught me. I thought of running for my dear life but on a second thought the door was already locked with keys so no where to run to

He pointed a torch light on my face and the first question was "what are you doing in my house"? I became a deaf and dumb person at that instance. (Who fit answer dat kind question? ). The man started shouting at the top of his voice and started calling neighbours that he had caught a thief in his house. I began to plead saying "Sir, I came to take your daughter Mathematics lesson and I carelessly slept off". A 50kg slap was registered on my face and he began to beat me mercilessly. When it was dawn, the police came and bundled me to the station since my girlfriend who was in the best position to save him also denied ever knowing me because she knew her head would be ripped off if she made a confession

I was granted a bail later in the day when the she finally confessed that I wasn't a thief


Lalasticlala come and share yours too

Synzu:
Boss I was devastated! Nearly even cried

But I didn't do anything "That night"

Synzu:
Lol. No amount of cunja can compare the items I lost that night seff

Even with very big barca?

misspicy:
Even with very big barca?

Smellymouth:
It happened couple of years back during my NYSC service year. I met this cute undergraduate on my way to Ikirun, Osun state where I was serving, became friends-->Lovers and she invited me over to spend the weekend at her place.


****Fast Forward ******



On that fateful day, I got to her hostel and met her hostel friends in her room, males/females; then it was BlackBerry Torch 2 that was in vogue, so I brought out my Silver BlackBerry Torch 2 and pretended I was making a call.Talking to my buddy; telling him how I got a contract with a construction firm, come and see lie na
That was how I got carried away, that I didn't even remember my ring tone again.The phone has been blasting " D'Banj's Oliver Twist " almost to the 2nd verse.
By the time I realized what was happening, all the ladies and dudes in the room were laughing their hearts out including the babe I went to see.
Mhennn,i just felt the floor should open and swallow me


Nota Bene:: Ireneony,falconey, Wristbangle ,una Weldone ooooo

Rexhenrex:
you just brought back memory of 100lvl days when I went to visit my mass.com babe at federal locust gra on a sunny Sunday morning(never knew there were military guys who start duty from 12 pm till 4am)...wore my favourite Vickers trouser and ma tommy Hilfiger briefs with ma well starched kharki shirt! as a fresh boy wore my Louis Vuitton shoe and a Rolex was feeling like an omo baba olowo!

as I entered her place na, she hugged me after gisting and uhm uhm,we decided to go to SFC as we came out of the house by I think 1pm the soldier guys were already at there check point so as we where passing the next thing I heard was bros come

me: how fa na
soldier guy: identify yourself

me: am henry,how can I help you
soldier guy: OK pull off the shirt!

me: I can't (I wan feel James bond for front of bae)

soldier guy: OK pull both the trouser

as I wanted saying this is preposterous, this guy landed me a slap (gbam )there was an eclipse first but i didn't feel it until like 3mins later I began to smile and started pulling my trouser,shoe,shirt,and wrist watch and she told me I was even chasing cars and used my shoes as a phone to make call..she broke up with me the next day that I wasn't man enough to fight for ma self talk more of for her...I later on found out that the last guy the soldier man slapped is still suffering from partial stroke. meaning I was lucky to be left with only a permanent palm imprint and some gap tooths!

#if I had gone to church I for no suffer like that.mean while Maryann na thunder without charging point go fire you!


BTW all this girls above 30 with rings on there nose instead of there fingers pls are you a bull

ireneony:
FTC

This Thread will not pass me by.
I know am not a guy. Abeg make una dash me like.

Let me share mine even though I'm not a guy.
There was this guy I love so much.
I have this feeling he was going to marry me.
He took me to his friend's birthday party.

In front of everyone in knelt down facing me, before he could utter any words, I jumped and screamed! Yes!!! I will marry you! Unknown to me , the reason he knelt down was that he was trying to lace his shoe. The next thing he said was babe what! I am not ready for marriage .

I was so embarrassed ...
Before I could face the audience, I woke up from my dream

Caringguy:
I'm good and how is the weather over there?

the weather makes alotta sense...like you are missing plenty oo ...

what you been up to?

henrylowe:
Very hilarious experience you've got up there Tosyne. Let me also share mine since there's nothing to be ashamed about

I dated this lady for a few months but the only barrier to effective display of our love in Tokyo was the fact that her parents were unnecessarily being strict which prevented us from having the opportunity to see each other but did more of phone conversation. In fact, I dare not visit her and even when she managed to sneak of the house to visit me, she would be very conscious of time for the fear of being scolded if her parents ever found her missing in the house.

One day, on a Friday to be precise, she called me to come and sleep over at her place as her parents were going for a vigil. As a sharp guy now, I smiled to God for answering my prayer. I went to the bathroom, got dressed and also lied to my own parents that I was also going for a vigil, I was granted amnesty by money dad and I headed to her place around 11pm. The whole show started for couple of minutes after which we both slept off (I don't expect anybody to ask me what the show was )

When it was around 4am, there was a knock on the door that was when I knew he was in deep mess. Her parent came earlier than expected. Ordinarily, according to her, she assured me that her parents would not return back until past 5am, but this time I guess things went out of hand.

After few minutes of discombobation on where to hide, I decided to hide beneath the curtain of the toilet located in the axis of the sitting room so that I would quietly sneak out through the main door as soon as they enter into their room. As God will have His way, I successfully hid there, she went to the door, open it and greeted her them. I heard her father playfully told her she no dey use sleep play and all that. She was heading back to her room when calamity happened

Her mother went straight into their room as her father headed towards the toilet to pee before going in with his wife. Seee gbege !!! Before I could say Jack, her father opened the curtain of the toilet and caught me. I thought of running for my dear life but on a second thought the door was already locked with keys so no where to run to

He pointed a torch light on my face and the first question was "what are you doing in my house"? I became a deaf and dumb person at that instance. (Who fit answer dat kind question? ). The man started shouting at the top of his voice and started calling neighbours that he had caught a thief in his house. I began to plead saying "Sir, I came to take your daughter Mathematics lesson and I carelessly slept off". A 50kg slap was registered on my face and he began to beat me mercilessly. When it was dawn, the police came and bundled me to the station since my girlfriend who was in the best position to save him also denied ever knowing me because she knew her head would be ripped off if she made a confession

I was granted a bail later in the day when the she finally confessed that I wasn't a thief


Lalasticlala come and share yours too

wristbangle:
Werey! chai

JoeCutie:
Lmao!

Dey there dey talk that thing now, people go begin suspect two of us say we don...

lwkm, Joe...you just confirmed their suspicion... smh...yeye pikin

Michellla:
"I couldn't just stand the humiliation and was forced to leave that night after which I passed the night in an uncompleted building"

We know you lying,but continue

Synzu:
Even if the cunja tight pass boy-scout knot

Lost lots of contacts that night.

Awwwnn
am sure you got them back

misspicy:
Awwwnn

am sure you got them back

Synzu:
I was robbed once when I went to visit a certain lass I was chatting with on BBM. I left my place for hers as late as 12midnight (the same neighbourhood) all because she told me she was soooo horrny and promised she'd fvck my brains out till I forget my ex. But when I got to her gate and pulled out my phone, I noticed some movements in the dark coming closer till they got in front of me. About four guys wielding weapons approached me and accused me of being an armed robber (even as I tried to explain) and before I could say Jack Robinson, they striped me of every possession I had on me including my belt and palm sandals(they gave me one wet old slippers) . I later gained access to her room that night but couldn't even summon enough enthusiasm to do the deed! I hated myself that day

misspicy:
Even with very big barca?

kingofchess:
tosyn.2much...what happened to ur 10 this 10 that....the change mantra don catch u too

I'm following the trend of change

Monalisa185:
the weather makes alotta sense...like you are missing plenty oo ...

what you been up to?

snakie86:
Make i tanda here first.....so many experience, dont even know where to start from

Oga Snakie na ur face be dis?

falconey:
Igboro ti take over.


typing..........


I gat so many that i cant think of one to narrate.

OK
it was 2010, i was dating this girl called queen whom lives 5 blocks away from my uncle's house where i reside then.

The first day we met she was looking for water with her keg In the estate, i saw her and offered to help her get it in our compound, she accepted and we both entered our compound,

as she was waiting for the water to get filled bro dickson bellow took over my senses as i was caressing her ass slowly, she didnt object, in my mind it was ( fal this is your lucky day).

i was very furious when the water got filled because i know i had to stop. Before she could pick the keg up to move out i quickly tricked her to come inside which she agreed.

Mehn i was about to UnCloth when my uncle's wife came in, i never expected her at that time because she always go to evening service every friday.

She caught us and i was so embarrassed because She respect me a lot and she do call me 'brother' ( yoruba courtesy to in-laws). After that night i lost the 'brother' lost the girl and bro dickson was dissapointed too.

ireneony weldone oooooooo

henrylowe:
Very hilarious experience you've got up there Tosyne. Let me also share mine since there's nothing to be ashamed about

I dated this lady for a few months but the only barrier to effective display of our love in Tokyo was the fact that her parents were unnecessarily being strict which prevented us from having the opportunity to see each other but did more of phone conversation. In fact, I dare not visit her and even when she managed to sneak of the house to visit me, she would be very conscious of time for the fear of being scolded if her parents ever found her missing in the house.

One day, on a Friday to be precise, she called me to come and sleep over at her place as her parents were going for a vigil. As a sharp guy now, I smiled to God for answering my prayer. I went to the bathroom, got dressed and also lied to my own parents that I was also going for a vigil, I was granted amnesty by money dad and I headed to her place around 11pm. The whole show started for couple of minutes after which we both slept off (I don't expect anybody to ask me what the show was )

When it was around 4am, there was a knock on the door that was when I knew he was in deep mess. Her parent came earlier than expected. Ordinarily, according to her, she assured me that her parents would not return back until past 5am, but this time I guess things went out of hand.

After few minutes of discombobation on where to hide, I decided to hide beneath the curtain of the toilet located in the axis of the sitting room so that I would quietly sneak out through the main door as soon as they enter into their room. As God will have His way, I successfully hid there, she went to the door, open it and greeted her them. I heard her father playfully told her she no dey use sleep play and all that. She was heading back to her room when calamity happened

Her mother went straight into their room as her father headed towards the toilet to pee before going in with his wife. Seee gbege !!! Before I could say Jack, her father opened the curtain of the toilet and caught me. I thought of running for my dear life but on a second thought the door was already locked with keys so no where to run to

He pointed a torch light on my face and the first question was "what are you doing in my house"? I became a deaf and dumb person at that instance. (Who fit answer dat kind question? ). The man started shouting at the top of his voice and started calling neighbours that he had caught a thief in his house. I began to plead saying "Sir, I came to take your daughter Mathematics lesson and I carelessly slept off". A 50kg slap was registered on my face and he began to beat me mercilessly. When it was dawn, the police came and bundled me to the station since my girlfriend who was in the best position to save him also denied ever knowing me because she knew her head would be ripped off if she made a confession

I was granted a bail later in the day when the she finally confessed that I wasn't a thief


Lalasticlala come and share yours too

Monalisa185:
hola buenos dias howdy?

tosyne2much:
Oga Snakie na ur face be dis?

Caringguy:
Am i really missing alot nah i don't think so..'''''


Nothing much oo..., just doing what i knows how to do best...

wristbangle:
Two years ago, similar experience happened to me when I paid a courtesy visit to my girlfriend who complained that I am not the caring type (hmm honestly women are complicated beings, this is someone I had to miss a job offer just to satisfy her selfish attention; chai lalasticlala can bear me witness that I have suffered in the hands of Women, he should push this article to FP so that guys can learn from my story ).

BACK TO THE STORY

So eventually I visited her but the greatest shock of my life was when my girlfriend told me to hide in the roof because she claimed that the male visitor knocking @ her door is a cultist.

I had no choice than to give in to her advice. Apart from the fact that the roof has terribly stained my shirt, the rats and mosquitoes were making jest of my skin. Now the real shocker was when I peeped through the roof to view what was going on between the cult guy and my girlfriend, my eyes went red when I saw the guy giving my ex girlfriend doggy style intimacy.

I couldn't hold the heartbreak, deceit and tears rolling from my eyes and when I shouted "Tola has killed me oo". I fell from the roof, hit my head against the floor and fainted immediately. I woke up in the hospital when the doctor told me that I have been unconscious for several days.


Hmmm women!

@ ireneony and falconey, weldone oo

Monalisa185:
no na, not missing a lot as in missing a lot... I meant via the weather condition na...

ermmm, what is it exactly you know how to do best sf?