Is she a virgin ? Lol if not please take heart ok.

Sirvingeo:
op you got a good wife. She has the fear of God that is why she wants you to do the church wedding which depicts God's involvement. You better don't loose a good woman because of sex o. I promise you a lady that could go this far for God will never cheat on you after wedding .

I wish you happy marriage life and I pray I get a godly wife like her. Amen!!!

So is there no God's involvement in traditional marriage?

Thank you sir.. crazy lady.

One Chance.
Oga go and collect your money back.
Never get into a marriage where a woman dictates terms.
You will hate the rest of your life.

ObongNizz:
One Chance.
Oga go and collect your money back.
Never get into a marriage where a woman dictates terms.
You will hate the rest of your life.

She would always want to dictate for you all the time.
Which style and when we should have sex as well.

igwegeorgiano:
Friends on NL I greet you all. Trust your day is going well? It is with very heavy heart and confused state of mind I sent this post on this platform so you can advise me on what line of action I should take. Pastors and genuine men of God should also advise me on what to do as well.

There is this lady i have been dating for about a year and 6 months now. We love each other to the moon and most importantly we respect each other opinion and decisions. She is a born again christian who appreciates the things of God more than she appreciates me which of course I have no issues with.

When we agreed to start up a relationship after being friends for about 6 months, it was agreed that there will be no sex until the wedding night but at a point I asked her "what if we are done with traditional marriage rites are we still not gonna have sex? To my creates surprise she said we won't until church wedding is done. I did not actually took her serious.

Fast forward, on the 15th of July 2019 the traditional marriage was done in her father' compound in the east and all I was asked to pay and give was paid and given without any remainder . after the traditional marriage we went back to my house in abuja. Note that we were not staying together before now. I am base in abuja while she is in owerri. When we got home that night I told her we can now make love as husband and wife hence the traditional rites has been done and most importantly the bride price paid. To my amazement my wife bluntly refused. She told me she will never compromise her stand on pre marital sex

I have been very faithful to our agreement based on her claim that she is a virgin. But refusing me my right over her body after every thing including the bride price has been paid is something I can never subscribed to and to this end I have I have involved her parent and her pastor her decision however, still remain no sex till the wedding night. I am putting the wedding on hold for now until she willingly allow me make love to her and she seems not to be comfortable with my decision as well.

This is the dilemma I have found myself please I need your wise counsels on this. Thanks and remain bless. Moderators kindly push this post to the front page so it can have adequate views it deserves thanks

if eventually she turns to be a virgin, do you think narailand advisers would believe you? she told you in relationship that no sex before marriage and you agreed. we should all learn to respect others. what is essence of being a Christian if you cannot obey God command.

DeeMain:


You have no honour. You have no respect for her nor for God. You gave her your word! And those words mean absolutely nothing to you.

Brother, I am angry. Two, I am ashamed on your behalf.

You agreed to wait till wedding night and now you are shifting goal posts, playing the victim and manipulating and blackmailing and guilt tripping her just so you can have your way.

This case is not about whether you are legally married or not already or if she is a virgin or not so don't try to bamboozle us with extraneous materials here as someone like me will call you out on your BS. This issue is about an agreement to wait and a promise not kept.

And the guilty party is YOU.

You see the way you do one thing is the way you do so many things. If I were her, I will begin to have serious doubts about your character and wonder if I've made a huge mistake.

Naansense and manipulation!

Thanks so much! I blame the girl for accepting to marry someone who doesn't share her godly principles. I guess she was desperate to answer Mrs.
See him exposing her and her value system to ridicule.
I hope this is a fake story. But if it's real, she will learn a bitter lesson on how not to be unequally yoked together with an unbeliever.
My spouse and I chose to honour God by waiting until after we have stood before God, said our vows before God and man, and received the blessings of family, friends and the elders of the Church. We have a very happy home.

id2019:
What's stopping you from fixing date for the white wedding. She told u all this before the relationship started.

you are a stupid person

Your sex life go suffer am when you marry a born again

Wetin go pain u pass eh be say she isn't a virgin, she stopped having sex after break ups and she go later beg you to forgive her

Be wise, confirm her virginity and wait till after wedding if she is truly a virgin.

OP on the contrary, she seems to have entered a once chance with the way you have handled everything. You both are supposed to stand before the alter of God with bed undefiled. What's your problem sef? Sex abi? That's the reason you're ridiculing her and the God she serves? You have simply shown you're not principled. Marriage is much more than sex and I don't think you're matured enough and prepared psychologically and spiritually for it. I only put the last.

peepydelano:
You are having a very good lady as your wife,count yourself very lucky.Why not fast forward your white wedding and have free access, and its not a big deal if she turns out not to be a virgin,appreciate the fact that she's God fearing. Respect her Godly wish and wait for the abundant blessings that follows,she is blessed amongst women

Good lady as how? Religion extremists is the worst set of human being to be with, they have paid your bride price which is the most important thing what else do you want. These are the kinda people who adore their pastors but disrespect their husband.

igwegeorgiano:
we did except virginity test and am seriously considering it now to ascertain the authenticity of her claim of being a virgin

e go too pain you if she isn't a virgin. Go and do virginity test this week before you come here again with regrets after the wedding.

We have treated a case like that here on nairaland before. She wasn't a virgin as claimed but stopped having sex after many break ups. That's another virgin crew

Bro let go of your ego, respect her decision, if you really love her you will be patient with her, is it not the same puna u will eat and get tired of? Why in a hurry ? I know konji na bastard but listen to her ,respect and understand her u will reap the reward not from her but from God. But mean while be very careful I have heard of similar situation here in Lagos ejigbo to be precised, it wasn't handled well, that the union crash

OP on the contrary, she seems to have entered a once chance with the way you have handled everything. You both are supposed to stand before the alter of God with bed undefiled. What's your problem sef? Sex abi? That's the reason you're ridiculing her and the God she serves? You have simply shown you're not principled. Marriage is much more than sex and I don't think you're matured enough and prepared psychologically and spiritually for it. I only pity the lady.

I was raped story loading

It's a scam!
A friend of mine had a similar experience and discovered a wide and smelly borehole project.
He divorced her sharply!
She hiding a rotten tomato.
Fear these SU girls oo.

Anyway, for those who sincerely wish to earn real cash via survey, please click on the link in my signature below.

igwegeorgiano:


To my greatest surprise she said she won't until the church service is done.

I did not actually took her serious.

When we got home that night I told her we can now make love as husband and wife hence the traditional rites has been done and most importantly the bride price paid.

She told me she will never compromise her stand on pre marital sex

I am putting the wedding on hold for now until she willingly allow me make love to her

Bro.... is the church service done? She was upfront about her stand on sex... why are you now furious? Marriage not yet complete and you raising hell over this small small matter. How would you handle real marriage problems?

id2019:
What's stopping you from fixing date for the white wedding. She told u all this before the relationship started.

What's stopping him?
Is the traditional marriage no longer acceptable?

Mental slavery will keep prevailing in Nigeria & Africa at large.

Why will a girl trick me into the traditions of another man country called White Wedding �?. I will never buy that idea �. No traditional marriage no marriage. Simple as ABCD.

I blame many Nigeria �� gentlemen for several failed marriages everywhere. Many of our men get carried away with the cheap fantasy in their relationship & invest heavily on their WHITE WEDDING.

Op stick to your agreement because none of NL members were there when both of made it

she get strong mind die where in the Bible that said after paying for pride Price and traditional white wedding must be done befor sex ,if you mistake married that girl u are on ur own ,collect the money yo have spend from her parent if dem can't be able to provide it let them give u the pride Price money .you have need to involved ur pastor or any family member that ur wife denying u sex after u have done the most important tin which the Bible said we should do She is hiding something

Africans are so stupid that they dont know traditional wedding is the main and only wedding approved by narure and God himself,christ never attended any white wedding,white wedding is not a must,d most important is traditionally,ur parents bless and approve the union, for her loving the things of God more dan u her husband is even a greater sin,none of her prayers will be answered if she doesn't obey u as the husband.

The real marriage institution is the Traditional wedding, church wedding is a religious concept.The problem now is how will she function in the marriage with her strong religious believes.I pray you don’t get the shock of your life after the wedding.The probability of her being a virgin is 90/10.

I pity the lady that wants to marry this kind of guy, it's obvious that the op is a self centered person that only thinks about himself and nothing more...

she is using a cream called virg.ina tightener.. the more days you wait the more the virg.ina become tight so she is using that white wedding to delay sex so that her virgin.a will be tight and look like a virgin... fear oweerri girls

@igwegeorgiano, you agreed on her terms from the beginning, and you were comfortable with it, otherwise you should have clarified, and sorted out this delicate issue then.

When you talk of marriage, there are three important phases or aspects of this.
1. The Court / Registry Wedding
2. Traditional Wedding
3. The Church Wedding.
Have you done the Court Wedding? You stated you have done the traditional, which has given her the right to move in with you.
In some parts of Nigeria, man and woman live together, and later formalise the union after having children ( based on financial issues, and the understanding of both parties).
The Church believes in both Court and Traditional weddings, hence the request for Court / Registry document before issuance of Church Wedding Certificate.
Go through the thread below, and let your conscience guide you.

https://www.nairaland.com/4229607/covenant-relationship-contract-marriage-vows

Love knows no bound, and has no limit. You need to understand and accommodate yourselves. When you think it's the end, it's just the beginning.

rafabenitez:
Africans are so stupid that they don't know traditional wedding is the main and only wedding approved by nature and God himself,christ never attended any white wedding,white wedding is not a must,d most important is traditionally,ur parents bless and approve the union, for her loving the things of God more dan u her husband is even a greater sin,none of her prayers will be answered if she doesn't obey u as the husband.

Africans are indeed suffering from mental slavery bro

bilag17:
@igwegeorgiano, you agreed on her terms from the beginning, and you were comfortable with it, otherwise you should have clarified, and sorted out this delicate issue then.

When you talk of marriage, there are three important phases or aspects of this.
1. The Court / Registry Wedding
2. Traditional Wedding
3. The Church Wedding.
Have you done the Court Wedding? You stated you have done the traditional, which has given her the right to move in with you.
In some parts of Nigeria, man and woman live together, and later formalise the union after having children ( based on financial understanding issues and understanding of both parties).
The Church believes in both Court and Traditional weddings, hence the request for Court / Registry document before issuance of Church Wedding Certificate.
Go through the thread below, and let your conscience guide you.

https://www.nairaland.com/4229607/covenant-relationship-contract-marriage-vows

Love knows no bound, and has no limit. You need to understand and accommodate yourselves. When you think it's the end, it's just the beginning.

Thank you

midnighter:
But you're still going to marry her in the church so what actually is the problem?

Somebody told you something ahead of time, you say you did not take her serious. now the thing is coming to pass and you're complaining. Nawa

Church wedding is important to some people because of the spiritual implications, why did you go ahead with a born-again if you can't even respect a basic decision like this

And on top of it you put the wedding on hold so you can force her to compromise on her principles Wow

Shouldn't you be happy that you married somebody who actually stands on their word and does as they say? Is this not a good quality to look for in a spouse?

This is the best response I have read so far. I kept wondering before scrolling down to see your contribution, why someone would have a good wife and still complain? Are you marrying primarily because of sex? If you respect her, respect her view about life too. And if you had gone this far, suspending wedding because of differences in your views about timing for sex before marriage is too mean, unscrupulous, menial and preposterous a reason. Why can't you just wait until after the wedding? You won't die before then. After all, you will get tired of it after your wedding. Soonest, I will be getting married, and for love's sake, I have sincerely and happily respected all my fiancee's rules and I am more comforted to do so because those things are temporal but marriage is till death. So, why can't I endure what is temporal for that which is permanent since those things will by themselves go after wedding? I respect those godly principles of my fiancee cos that is what is called VIRTUE which is not common in this generation where we are controlled by our impulses and satisfy it at all cost and don't care whether we defy moral values or not.

I pray she's not making a mistake, because your self-centeredness can affect your marriage, that's a bitter truth, except you change and allow God mold you. Please, desuspend your wedding (if there's an English like that), wait for that day and enjoy yourself after then. I understand, but still be patient; you will have a good wife in her.

igwegeorgiano:
Friends on NL I greet you all. Trust your day is going well? It is with very heavy heart and confused state of mind I sent this post on this platform so you can advise me on what line of action I should take. Pastors and genuine men of God should also advise me on what to do as well.

There is this lady i have been dating for about a year and 6 months now. We love each other to the moon and most importantly we respect each other opinion and decisions. She is a born again christian who appreciates the things of God more than she appreciates me which of course I have no issues with.

When we agreed to start up a relationship after being friends for about 6 months, it was agreed that there will be no sex until the wedding night but at a point I asked her "what if we are done with traditional marriage rites are we still not gonna have sex? To my creates surprise she said we won't until church wedding is done. I did not actually took her serious.

Fast forward, on the 15th of July 2019 the traditional marriage was done in her father' compound in the east and all I was asked to pay and give was paid and given without any remainder . after the traditional marriage we went back to my house in abuja. Note that we were not staying together before now. I am base in abuja while she is in owerri. When we got home that night I told her we can now make love as husband and wife hence the traditional rites has been done and most importantly the bride price paid. To my amazement my wife bluntly refused. She told me she will never compromise her stand on pre marital sex

I have been very faithful to our agreement based on her claim that she is a virgin. But refusing me my right over her body after every thing including the bride price has been paid is something I can never subscribed to and to this end I have I have involved her parent and her pastor her decision however, still remain no sex till the wedding night. I am putting the wedding on hold for now until she willingly allow me make love to her and she seems not to be comfortable with my decision as well.

This is the dilemma I have found myself please I need your wise counsels on this. Thanks and remain bless. Moderators kindly push this post to the front page so it can have adequate views it deserves thanks

Mr. Man, you are very lucky to have such a woman as a wife. You have to respect her wishes as a child of God because she made it clear to you from day one. Now, my point is how can you date a woman for 1yr and 6month without taking her serious? If your wife can be this smart with the things of God, why did you choose not to be smart with the rules your wife made since sex is the paramount factor of you marrying your wife. IS THERE ANY RULES AGAINST DOING BOTH WHITE AND TRADITIONAL MARRIAGE THE SAME DAY? AND THEN ENJOY YOUR WIFE THAT SAME DAY Haba.....Why cant some men use their brain when things are so delicate to you like this..Huh? We made a mistake during Adam and Eve era, most we the men continue to make mistakes over women all the time? Mr. Man, allow your wife to be and respect her wishes and use your dump head well by immediately fast forwarding the white wedding the next week if you have the means and enjoy your right after church vows, even if you decide not to take pictures after the wedding and bundle her into the car and drive home straight to enjoy your woman, nobody will fight you after all its yours for life. This is a lesson to every other Men reading this, always learn to be smart when you have to be and stop coming to public place to display your stupidity.

E don be for you

Op, A promise with God is a big business. Pls respect her decision and wed her in the church. If she is a Catholic no Holy Communion for her until the church wedding. Pls respect the agreement both of you had.

Holy shit.. This is the funniest thing I've read in a long time... You're screwed bro!!!
Sorry, but i think you just married an overly religious person..