My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. - Romance (6)

My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. - Romance (6) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum › Nairaland General › Romance › My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. (84538 Views)

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Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Roadtorecovery(op): 11:49pm On Jan 09, 2020

I hope to achieve what you have done.
Congratulations.

wiseone28:
And 14 Feb will take me 5years without entering the hole

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Nobody: 11:50pm On Jan 09, 2020

wiseone28:
And 14 Feb will take me 5years without entering the hole

verily i say to u a hole will visit u this night

1 Like

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Roadtorecovery(op): 11:52pm On Jan 09, 2020

Thanks for the assurances and practical suggestions. I will try my best to apply them.

OkCornel:
@roadtorecovery, don’t be downtrodden.

Look at the bigger picture, you’ll realise the improvements you’ve made, and the relapse is only a blot on a blank page

And as for addiction, you can’t conquer it if you focus on it. Channel your focus to something else. I’m sure you’ve got talents or a worthy cause you’re passionate about to help improve the lives of those around you.

Channel your focus and energy into such. That way, your addiction dies a gradual death and is replaced by something better and productive.

In summary, the replace bad habits with good ones.

You’ve done well to be celibate for 10 months, and I’m sure you’ll do better going forward.

1 Like

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Apination(m): 11:52pm On Jan 09, 2020

Roadtorecovery:
Good evening everyone.

I have struggled with sex addiction for the past 10 years with out permanent success especially with regards to visiting and sleeping with prostitutes and keeping my mind off sex.
Presently I cant seem to keep my mind of sex and focus on my life and career.

I have a good Job and a beautiful damsel whom i have promised marriage and I am afraid I might loose any if not both of this if I don't stop,think and act NOW.

Since is a habit I learnt over time, how do I unlearn this habit permanently.

Please has anyone been able to get over sex addiction successfully.

My recent relapse after 10 months of celibacy threw me off balance and presently I have lost touch with God, friends and family because of this demeaning lifestyle.

Today after 2 weeks of relapse and wallowing in self pity, I have decided to restart all over again with strong determination to take into consideration the lesson learnt from my last relapse as I plan to adopt a better approach to ensure I conquer this habit.

I have spoken with one of spiritual director who understands sex addiction above my expectations and he is very supportive.

I have also opened up to my younger Cousin brother who also understands what it feels to suffer addiction.

I also confessed to my lady about my relapse and strong determination to quit and she is helpful and supportive but with the condition that she may not cope if I should suffer another relapse.

My addiction and its resultant consequences have made close family and friends loose their respect and confidence in me.

Above all, i feel so separated by God who have done so much for me .

I want to pick my self up and fight because of

1.God
2.Myself
3. Family
4. My girl friend

At this point I need all the help I can get to snatch out my life out of satanic bait to ruin me forever

Any professional here can please save a frustrated brother. I have not give up.

The first step is to retrace that thought of God separating himself from you.

Romans 8:31-39 New Living Translation (NLT)
Nothing Can Separate Us from God’s Love
31 What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us? 32 Since he did not spare even his own Son but gave him up for us all, won’t he also give us everything else? 33 Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own? No one—for God himself has given us right standing with himself. 34 Who then will condemn us? No one—for Christ Jesus died for us and was raised to life for us, and he is sitting in the place of honor at God’s right hand, pleading for us.

35 Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? 36 (As the Scriptures say, “For your sake we are killed every day; we are being slaughtered like sheep.”[a]) 37 No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.

38 And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[b] neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. 39 No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Roadtorecovery(op): 11:53pm On Jan 09, 2020

Do we have such here in Nigeria?

AwkaetitiBabe:
I think you need therapy. Go for AA meetings. Sex addiction is simply like alcohol addiction.

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Roadtorecovery(op): 11:57pm On Jan 09, 2020

Of what benefit will i derive from framing up this.
I am at lowest point of my moral life. I just don't want to get comfortable doing what is bad. I don't want to suppress my conscience.

emkz:
This story, without variations, was posted on Nairaland some years back. I am surprised it is surfacing again.

If you are truly suffering from sexual addiction, I pray for your healing. If you are not but decided to recycle an old story to convince yourself that you are intelligent, well, words and wishes are powerful and I can only plead with you not to curse yourself.

1 Like

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Roadtorecovery(op): 11:59pm On Jan 09, 2020

Thank you.

Riscawendy:
I think you need to ask yourself some questions.
To every effect there must be a cause.
What are the things that leads you to this addiction.
If is pornography stop watching it.
If is loneliness, you have a girl friend call, chat or stay with her when you're feeling lonely.
If is the books you read stop reading them.
If is the friends you keep dissociate yourself from them.
I hope this will help.

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Roadtorecovery(op): 12:03am On Jan 10, 2020

Not as you think.
I obtained my university degree at 26 and as a virgin

AngelicBeing:
Foundational problems

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Roadtorecovery(op): 12:09am On Jan 10, 2020

Thanks

abdullkabar:
@Op, since you weren't born with this addiction, definetly you can overcome it.
One thing I know about addiction is you can't easily overcome it if the triggers to it are very much still available.
Maybe its due to your hangout spots, kind off friends you keep, your residence or anything.
Know the triggers, then you know more on how to tackle it, and also, addictions are not that easy to loose. Give it time
Days of relapse are part of the healing(just quickly call yourself to caution and know what triggered your relapse)

Easier said than done

1 Like

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Roadtorecovery(op): 12:12am On Jan 10, 2020

Sad consequences. I look forward to conquering this habit.

Brightgem:
Think all the consequences of sexual laxity. Some are not even physical. I used to think that was crap, but you don't keep joining body with just anybody, na so some kain evil spirit or evil destiny go begin follow you.

Also imagine one of your kids having a behavior like this and how you'll feel knowing this, cuz they might start at such a young age. So get rid of the spirit that's making you tempted.

Now more seriously. Even when on a diet, you derail sometimes, get back up, don't follow trails that lead you to what you don't want.

What you feed your mind is very important. Not sure I'm saying anything that hasn't been said. Good enough that you identified you have a problem

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Nobody: 12:14am On Jan 10, 2020

Whoress drain you financially so think about that when considering a family.

Pick up a book and read and try to spend quality time with your babe.

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Roadtorecovery(op): 12:14am On Jan 10, 2020

Thanks.
I sent you a mail.

sheunex:
Hello bro, I respect the fact you understand your battles and ready to fight head on. As a christian and psychologist, you can reach me via this email :oluwaseunoluwafemi23@gmail.com, let's discuss and find a long lasting exit for this.

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Roadtorecovery(op): 12:17am On Jan 10, 2020

I will appreciate your opinion.
I am not happy with what I am doing to my self and others. I honestly want to be a changed man. I have goals and plans for the future.[quote author=Kay25 post=85657463][/quote]

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Roadtorecovery(op): 12:21am On Jan 10, 2020

Not even to an enemy.

Enemyofpeace:
What's wrong in being addicted to sex? Abeg give me the addiction if you don't want again

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Righteousness89(m): 12:28am On Jan 10, 2020

[s]

Rapmoney:
If they check properly, you even do worse than the poster.

[/s]

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by ShawnT(m): 1:46am On Jan 10, 2020

Bro join the military,when they engage you hehn,you will forget sex.its cos you have much leisure time that's y.when you carry riffle and you're placed on better sentry duty.make I see how you'll go Bleep your prostitutes.

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by seangy4konji: 1:56am On Jan 10, 2020

Na d ogogoro deh direct you..how much sperm you get...

Ten months you stay away you say addict. Hahaha..keep your eyes off those small girls in area with perky breast and go and be hustling..

You are just a freak and pervert which if you can take yourbwyea off woman body you would be fine...it's not masturbation...if you don't have woman you won't sex now..sex your woman only and give it time or if you like to cone often ?give her time table cos I can't imagine you going to work after aexing her early morning,having a small breakie and still thinking of sex while working..

Drink less,no smoking and focus on becoming adebuga soon..

Your prick no go control you..remember ogogoro self avoid am..

That iya bashira with big bipples in your area also. Avoid seeing her..

No involve God..na ur own decision to become knack knack master. Me myself konji master not addicted so don't blame me.

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by lekonso: 2:37am On Jan 10, 2020

Give your life to Jesus Christ and be going to church regularly listening to the word of God, become a worker in the house of God. Then make a covenant with God that anytime you are involved with a prostitute again in your life God should kill you on top of her. You have power to control your body, except you are not using that power.

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Chuka002: 3:18am On Jan 10, 2020

Roadtorecovery:
Good evening everyone.

I have struggled with sex addiction for the past 10 years with out permanent success especially with regards to visiting and sleeping with prostitutes and keeping my mind off sex.
Presently I cant seem to keep my mind of sex and focus on my life and career.

I have a good Job and a beautiful damsel whom i have promised marriage and I am afraid I might loose any if not both of this if I don't stop,think and act NOW.

Since is a habit I learnt over time, how do I unlearn this habit permanently.

Please has anyone been able to get over sex addiction successfully.

My recent relapse after 10 months of celibacy threw me off balance and presently I have lost touch with God, friends and family because of this demeaning lifestyle.

Today after 2 weeks of relapse and wallowing in self pity, I have decided to restart all over again with strong determination to take into consideration the lesson learnt from my last relapse as I plan to adopt a better approach to ensure I conquer this habit.

I have spoken with one of spiritual director who understands sex addiction above my expectations and he is very supportive.

I have also opened up to my younger Cousin brother who also understands what it feels to suffer addiction.

I also confessed to my lady about my relapse and strong determination to quit and she is helpful and supportive but with the condition that she may not cope if I should suffer another relapse.

My addiction and its resultant consequences have made close family and friends loose their respect and confidence in me.

Above all, i feel so separated by God who have done so much for me .

I want to pick my self up and fight because of

1.God
2.Myself
3. Family
4. My girl friend

At this point I need all the help I can get to snatch out my life out of satanic bait to ruin me forever

Any professional here can please save a frustrated brother. I have not give up.

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Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by jclassiq(m): 3:32am On Jan 10, 2020

Melvict:
I can help

How?

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Nobody: 3:35am On Jan 10, 2020

Get married and stop sleeping with prostitute because most of them use charm to keep dragging their customers back. I don't think you have a problem what am seeing is a psychological issues

1 Like

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Olu3939(m): 4:14am On Jan 10, 2020

Roadtorecovery:
Good evening everyone.

I have struggled with sex addiction for the past 10 years with out permanent success especially with regards to visiting and sleeping with prostitutes and keeping my mind off sex.
Presently I cant seem to keep my mind of sex and focus on my life and career.

I have a good Job and a beautiful damsel whom i have promised marriage and I am afraid I might loose any if not both of this if I don't stop,think and act NOW.

Since is a habit I learnt over time, how do I unlearn this habit permanently.

Please has anyone been able to get over sex addiction successfully.

My recent relapse after 10 months of celibacy threw me off balance and presently I have lost touch with God, friends and family because of this demeaning lifestyle.

Today after 2 weeks of relapse and wallowing in self pity, I have decided to restart all over again with strong determination to take into consideration the lesson learnt from my last relapse as I plan to adopt a better approach to ensure I conquer this habit.

I have spoken with one of spiritual director who understands sex addiction above my expectations and he is very supportive.

I have also opened up to my younger Cousin brother who also understands what it feels to suffer addiction.

I also confessed to my lady about my relapse and strong determination to quit and she is helpful and supportive but with the condition that she may not cope if I should suffer another relapse.

My addiction and its resultant consequences have made close family and friends loose their respect and confidence in me.

Above all, i feel so separated by God who have done so much for me .

I want to pick my self up and fight because of

1.God
2.Myself
3. Family
4. My girl friend

At this point I need all the help I can get to snatch out my life out of satanic bait to ruin me forever

Any professional here can please save a frustrated brother. I have not give up.

I was like you (except for the prostitute part) before I met Jesus Christ in 1990. After my encounter with and surrender to Him, everything changed. Jesus is the final solution my brother. Try Him.

1 Like

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Lotechi(m): 4:16am On Jan 10, 2020

soberdrunk:
Any man that can stay "10 months" without sex isn't a "sex addict". I don't know why some people just like to create imaginary problems for themselves, you are healthy brah, all you have to do is channel that sexual energy to your lady and a few side chics(if you are a variety man) or stay loyal to only your lady and your palms, you will reach a certain age and slow down naturally. Stop looking for what isn't missing, every "normal" man wakes up with erection every single day......

you took the words out of my mouth. From the story, it sounds like he is not allowed to have sex with his girlfriend, and that is really sad. Sex is healthy.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by MondayOsunbor(m): 4:24am On Jan 10, 2020

tydi:
Hurry marry your damsel and have it to your satisfaction..
Na you go still come here say you no do again say na celibate you wan dey.

honestly it do not work that way!

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Pedrotina11: 4:43am On Jan 10, 2020

soberdrunk:
Any man that can stay "10 months" without sex isn't a "sex addict". I don't know why some people just like to create imaginary problems for themselves, you are healthy brah, all you have to do is channel that sexual energy to your lady and a few side chics(if you are a variety man) or stay loyal to only your lady and your palms, you will reach a certain age and slow down naturally. Stop looking for what isn't missing, every "normal" man wakes up with erection every single day......

Ah tire o...imaginary problem...tell am..

1 Like

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by helpee(m): 4:49am On Jan 10, 2020

@roadtorecovery, decades ago, I was addicted to masturbation in school. It was so bad that one day, I went on a marathon fasting for three days without food and water. I was so tired. I slept with serious hunger about one hour before I finally broke the fast and I woke up with hard erection pressing the foam. The feeling was so sweet and I continued rubbing the erection against the foam till I released. Come and see frustration. But that was also my point of deliverance. I just told myself....IF I MASTURBATE, NA GOD I OFFEND NO BE DEVIL SO I DONT CARE AGAIN. Truth is....I still masturbated for close to a year afterwards but I was no longer feeling so guilty about it and the lesser the guilt, the lesser I was doing it. Let me tell you the problem...YOU FEEL YOU ARE OFFENDING GOD SO YOU WILL KEEP RELAPSING. Don't mind what over religious folks will tell you. Stop feeling extremely guilty. It will lead to a psychiatric problem. You already have at least two features of major depression which is a psychiatric problem. You are feeling low all the time and you are losing interest in things. Once the devil knows you no longer feel too guilty he will lose his edge over you. Gradually, you won't see the need for the addiction again and you will stop. This is not cocaine or heroine that you need special help. YOU WANT TO USE YOUR ABSTINENCE TO PLEASE GOD. IT WILL BE DIFFICULT COS YOU WILL FEEL GUILTY AFTER EACH RELAPSE AND YOU WILL GIVE UP. Tell the devil....I am not offending you na God I offend . Let God kill his son if that is the way he corrects them. Some people that don't understand what I am saying will tell you I am lying buy I've passed through this before so I am so SURE THE MOMENT YOU STOP THINKING THAT GOD IS HAPPY WITH YOU ONLY WHEN YOU STOP....that is the beginning of your road to deliverance. Wether you are addicted or not, God don't love you more so stop allowing the devil to use that as a bate. You will still go and have sex... but you won't feel guilty and suddenly you will see it will lose its hold on you

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Omotexc: 5:08am On Jan 10, 2020

Pray to God for deliverance from a satanic bondage, you have a brighter future don't allow the devil to cut your dream off through immorality,

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by NoToPile: 5:24am On Jan 10, 2020

Marriage doesnt cure sexual addiction, deal with it before you get married.

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Nobody: 5:27am On Jan 10, 2020

Roadtorecovery:
Good evening everyone.

I have struggled with sex addiction for the past 10 years with out permanent success especially with regards to visiting and sleeping with prostitutes and keeping my mind off sex.
Presently I cant seem to keep my mind of sex and focus on my life and career.

I have a good Job and a beautiful damsel whom i have promised marriage and I am afraid I might loose any if not both of this if I don't stop,think and act NOW.

Since is a habit I learnt over time, how do I unlearn this habit permanently.

Please has anyone been able to get over sex addiction successfully.

My recent relapse after 10 months of celibacy threw me off balance and presently I have lost touch with God, friends and family because of this demeaning lifestyle.

Today after 2 weeks of relapse and wallowing in self pity, I have decided to restart all over again with strong determination to take into consideration the lesson learnt from my last relapse as I plan to adopt a better approach to ensure I conquer this habit.

I have spoken with one of spiritual director who understands sex addiction above my expectations and he is very supportive.

I have also opened up to my younger Cousin brother who also understands what it feels to suffer addiction.

I also confessed to my lady about my relapse and strong determination to quit and she is helpful and supportive but with the condition that she may not cope if I should suffer another relapse.

My addiction and its resultant consequences have made close family and friends loose their respect and confidence in me.

Above all, i feel so separated by God who have done so much for me .

I want to pick my self up and fight because of

1.God
2.Myself
3. Family
4. My girl friend

At this point I need all the help I can get to snatch out my life out of satanic bait to ruin me forever

Any professional here can please save a frustrated brother. I have not give up.

Don't give up there's something greater than sexual urge and that is anointing you can't generate anointing per day if you are not born again first step to your freedom is to give your life to Christ but if you are born again then you need the power to overcome I was a porn addict from secondary school days(jss3) but after my encounter with the Lord I was set free. for more help email me at viciheaka@gmail.com

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by AngelicBeing: 5:41am On Jan 10, 2020

Roadtorecovery:
Not as you think.
I obtained my university degree at 26 and as a virgin

Foundational problems goes beyond you, carry out an investigation into your ancestral roots ( father's and mothers side) we are the products of our ancestors, their character traits / bloodlines / etc flows into us and if we don't address our foundational problems, it will or must pop up to affect us in the future , that is what I meant by foundational problems, When the foundation is destroyed, what can the righteous do? Let me not sound too religious but I hope you understand what I meant cool

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by cococandy(f): 5:44am On Jan 10, 2020

That’s not how addiction works

As with drugs, alcohol, etc, sex addicts can stay “clean” for extended times before relapsing. His 10 month “sober” state doesn’t mean he doesn’t still have the problem.

I see how many folks liked your post. Shows the need education that is sorely lacking.

soberdrunk:
Any man that can stay "10 months" without sex isn't a "sex addict". I don't know why some people just like to create imaginary problems for themselves, you are healthy brah, all you have to do is channel that sexual energy to your lady and a few side chics(if you are a variety man) or stay loyal to only your lady and your palms, you will reach a certain age and slow down naturally. Stop looking for what isn't missing, every "normal" man wakes up with erection every single day......

1 Like

Re: My Ten Year Struggle With Sex Addiction Is Ruining me. by Marpol: 5:55am On Jan 10, 2020

Roadtorecovery:
Good evening everyone.

I have struggled with sex addiction for the past 10 years with out permanent success especially with regards to visiting and sleeping with prostitutes and keeping my mind off sex.
Presently I cant seem to keep my mind of sex and focus on my life and career.

I have a good Job and a beautiful damsel whom i have promised marriage and I am afraid I might loose any if not both of this if I don't stop,think and act NOW.

Since is a habit I learnt over time, how do I unlearn this habit permanently.

Please has anyone been able to get over sex addiction successfully.

My recent relapse after 10 months of celibacy threw me off balance and presently I have lost touch with God, friends and family because of this demeaning lifestyle.

Today after 2 weeks of relapse and wallowing in self pity, I have decided to restart all over again with strong determination to take into consideration the lesson learnt from my last relapse as I plan to adopt a better approach to ensure I conquer this habit.

I have spoken with one of spiritual director who understands sex addiction above my expectations and he is very supportive.

I have also opened up to my younger Cousin brother who also understands what it feels to suffer addiction.

I also confessed to my lady about my relapse and strong determination to quit and she is helpful and supportive but with the condition that she may not cope if I should suffer another relapse.

My addiction and its resultant consequences have made close family and friends loose their respect and confidence in me.

Above all, i feel so separated by God who have done so much for me .

I want to pick my self up and fight because of

1.God
2.Myself
3. Family
4. My girl friend

At this point I need all the help I can get to snatch out my life out of satanic bait to ruin me forever

Any professional here can please save a frustrated brother. I have not give up.

My brother you are not a sex addict. If you can stay celibate for 10months without doing.

Are you and your girlfriend sexually active? The only problem I foresee is if your girlfriend gives you sex and you still crave prostitues.

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