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My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us - Family (21) - Nairaland

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Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:16pm On Mar 13, 2020
Davash222:

How is she independent when she’s still living with a man
If she’s independent, let her divorce the man and rent a house for herself and her kids. That’s what I call independent.
She’s begging a man to accommodate her son and you’re claiming she’s independent.
grin Sense too full your head. Correct one, thumbs up

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by xendra: 2:16pm On Mar 13, 2020
AreaFada2:


Lol. Don't be surprised if it was the man who funded the shop from which she says she pays 70% of the bill. grin grin

Women are just not cut out to contribute more to the household financially. If you like pay for her education, train, open shop for her, same thing.

To bring a difficult child you do not have the freedom to discipline like your own biological son is a nightmare. For any self-respecting man. I saw it around my neighbourhood growing up.
but if it was the mans child, your wide mouth will open to call women evil and unwilling to accept their husbands child as their own. Iranu

4 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Richy4(m): 2:16pm On Mar 13, 2020
Blyzz:
Bro it a Favour. Taking care of another man's child when he's not financially buoyant, you think it easy? Who will marry second hand woman, unless the man has a kid elsewhere, then the marriage will be in a state of equilibrium.

I disagree with u sir. That man can count what he is benefiting from that relationship without you and I knowing it. Remember he was aware of the wife's situation before he agreed to it.. We can't speak for him at the moment.. only him can speak for himself

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Mycommand: 2:19pm On Mar 13, 2020
If he is legally in the country where he resides in, tell him to file his son's immigration papers! That he is not in Nigeria is not a good excuse.

Vyvyanvyvy:

He is not in Nigeria

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by xendra: 2:20pm On Mar 13, 2020
letskeeptalking:


You foot 70% of bills in your house and yet you allow your husband to dictate to you what to do with your own son.

Madam, I don't think you are a serious person.

Personally I will rather be single than be with a man who will stand between me and my children. Even if I have to live in poverty. But you are financially capable, you just want to answer 'Mrs' at the expense of your child.

After bouncing him off relatives for years, you are now using your husband as an excuse to run from your duty.

Shame!
honestly this is what I thought when she said that. she just doesn't care enough, a woman that cares enough will not allow a title "mrs" come btw her and her childs well being
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:20pm On Mar 13, 2020
movement2020:
How old is your son?

How old is your daughter?

How many kids do you have for your new husband?

Where are the father(s) of the other kids?

Are you still in touch? If NO, what about his siblings? Are they much around?

Have you improved financially to accommodate your son?

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:22pm On Mar 13, 2020
xendra:
honestly this is what I thought when she said that. she just doesn't care enough, a woman that cares enough will not allow a title "mrs" come btw her and her childs well being

Gbenu s'oun ode
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Vyvyanvyvy: 2:22pm On Mar 13, 2020
[quote author=apatheticme post=87410047]

I really feel for your son and you. It's not your fault u are caught in between caring for ur children and husband. However ur Son needs you now than ever. He may end up hating you eventually if you can't risk all for him right now.

It is heartbreaking right now but the truth is you have to take care of all your children. Get him to go to boarding house, and only come home during break. Maybe your husband will accept that option.

Meanwhile, pray, there's nothing prayers cannot achieve

God be with you

Thank you I have no ideas about how boarding school work , fees and how long for acceptance etc etc
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by xendra: 2:22pm On Mar 13, 2020
Amumaigwe:


@Bolded
This mentality may be why you are still single. Inninit?
and there is nothing wrong with the mentality. dumb dick, if your mother did it for you; your ass will not complain.
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by BORN2RULE20(m): 2:23pm On Mar 13, 2020
HMMMM

FABRICATED STORY JUST TO GET TRAFFIC

ANYWAYS, MAN MUST EAT, AND SOMEONE MUST GET PAID

SUCH IS LIFE
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Belafonte(m): 2:23pm On Mar 13, 2020
liverpool72:
yeye likes

Why likes? I ma a staunch advocate of never marrying a single mother under any circumstance. I nearly entered and I thank God I came back to my senses after seeing unsustainable lifestyle and worldview patterns.

The man is yeye because he is going back on his word. He promised to have all his wives children live with him and now he’s backing out. He should be knocked on the head.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Vyvyanvyvy: 2:24pm On Mar 13, 2020
Mycommand:
If he is legally in the country where he resides in, tell him to file his son's immigration papers! That he is not in Nigeria is not a good excuse.

I don’t have his phone number

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:24pm On Mar 13, 2020
Oyindidi:
Lol, men hate independent womengrin see as e dey pain you.

Modifiedgrin
O ye Nairaland men! cheesy I like the taste of your tears, keep crying in my mentiongrin
I said what I said with my chest grin

You be ashewo

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by xendra: 2:24pm On Mar 13, 2020
M00N:

Gbenu s'oun ode
another mumu misogynist

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Belafonte(m): 2:25pm On Mar 13, 2020
uruba23:

Yimu be doing as if you didn't steal when you are twelve.

If theft is passed down in your lineage and seen as normal, I would like you to understand that not everyone has such values.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by AreaFada2: 2:26pm On Mar 13, 2020
xendra:
but if it was the mans child, your wide mouth will open to call women evil and unwilling to accept their husbands child as their own. Iranu

Well, my cute sexy mouth will always say what is fair. kiss kiss

We know there are far more evil step-mums out there than there evil step-dads. History, literature and folklore attest to it.

In another thread by King Satan, I clearly stated that both men and women should carefully consider if they need step kids.

Growing up I know of women who starved step-kids in my area. But no step-dad refused to pay school fees, buy clothes or deny fatherly responsibilities. But in old age, the step-kids they used their youth to raise and educate were mostly ingrates. Their never-do-well biological dads suddenly came on the scene when most had graduated from uni. Back in the day jobs were not scarce.

I talk from what I saw happening.

4 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Belafonte(m): 2:27pm On Mar 13, 2020
Viicfuntop:




He is 12. He is still a child. So what he stole? You think he just strted stealing because it was hereditary

His stepfather is apprehensive because his aunt and uncle have vehemently rejected him. And like I said, that is probably not his first infraction.

People seem to be missing the point that this boy is troubled and misbehaving and his stepdad isn’t ready to suffer this boy’s delinquencies.

Perhaps, when he made the promise to house his wife’s children, he didn’t know there was a problem child in the bargain.

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:27pm On Mar 13, 2020
Richy4:


I disagree with u sir. That man can count what he is benefiting from that relationship without you and I knowing it. Remember he was aware of the wife's situation before he agreed to it.. We can't speak for him at the moment.. only him can speak for himself
crystal clear, hearing from a woman alone is dangerous. Some women are devil by themselves. On the first page of this thread, scroll down, the second to the last person who commented, you'd hear her own reasons of marrying again. If she takes care of 70% of her current home, what stop her for renting her own house? How can a woman with two kids don't know her former husband relatives or siblings. She doesn't also know the grandmother of her former husband? Even if his grandmother is dead, Facebook is available. Why can't her search for his former husband's siblings only. Yeye dey smell from her story, she doesn't want to tell us she had bad attitude that's why her previous husband's family didn't accept the kids

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by TabletMan: 2:29pm On Mar 13, 2020
Vyvyanvyvy:

Thanks am going to pick him up this Sunday I will bring him to the house and let him do his worst. I pay the rent if he is not happy then he has to leave me with my children . This thing has been stressing me my bp is already high which is not good for my pregnancy I need to be alive for my children and I won’t let him stress me anymore
You created this thread not to seek advice but to validate your actions because I knew you have already made plans for your son before opening this thread.
Some of these people advising you to divorce your husband are product of broken and warring homes.
That your son needs a fatherly figure in his life and just from your many comments I can only deduce that you're not capable of being both the man and woman in his life.
Go on with your plan but please don't quarrel or trouble your husband because he doesn't support it rather convince him with valid reasons why your son needs to be with you. He may not like the idea of your son living with you people but with time, he will get use to the boy. Make peace with your man because I can see taking 70% of the bills is raising up your pride and ego. You're healthy and alive and non of your relatives is capable of taking care of your only son what if something happens tomorrow? who is going to take care of your 3/4 children? .
I believe your husband is acting due to bad advise and influence of people, family members or friends that's why he is rejecting your son but accepted your daughter like his own, even after promising of taking care of both of them in the past.
Be wise in your dealings because you have made the first mistake, don't let pride and ego be your second mistake .
Make your husband to love your son and you will never regret it.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Oyindidi(f): 2:32pm On Mar 13, 2020
M00N:


You be ashewo
Hahahaha.... E pain you. Ashawo na insult?
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:35pm On Mar 13, 2020
Oyindidi:
Hahahaha.... E pain you. Ashawo na insult?
Idiot
You are nothing more than a baby mama

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:36pm On Mar 13, 2020
xendra:
another mumu misogynist

Your fada

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Oyindidi(f): 2:37pm On Mar 13, 2020
M00N:

Idiot
You are nothing more than a baby mama
This will make your balls(ego) bigger I guess. You go cry hot blood for my mentiongringrin
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by adexpa(m): 2:38pm On Mar 13, 2020
The man agreed to allow your kids at first to achieve his selfishness, he accepted the offer because you are reasonably doing well financially and he needs such a man possibly because he cant fully bear whole family burden. He wouldn't have propose marriage suppose you are not doing well financially. It takes extra grace for man to assume someone else responsibility especially when the owner(ex-husban) is alive.

My advice;
1) Do not bring the boy home by force because the boy will face the same thing he is facing right now from man(he wouldn't love him n he will maltreat him at any chance). If he doesn't send you out, the home will not be perfect anymore because you have disobeyed him and took action by yourself.

2) Talk to him humbly(stupid all this I foot 70% while addressing your man) by making him realise that the boy is your joy and he can alone make you happy by allowing the boy..... Please with him
3) If you have done the above and the man insist, you can suggest to him separation, tell him you want your son and since he disagree, you need alternative. The two of you can talk on how to achieve that, either you have a separate place where he will be visiting or full separation.


The matter require diplomacy and not force.

I wish you the best

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by wisdomkid: 2:38pm On Mar 13, 2020
Davash222:
Your siblings that are your relatives doesn't want the boy but you want your husband that is not your relative to accept the boy
You should learn to attend to your responsibilities and mistakes. Don't drag your mistakes to that innocent man. He has done more than enough for you.

Marrying a Nigerian girl with two children(not even one) is not what every man can do. That man deserves peace and respect from you.

I would have argued with these facts. But it's shamelessly true. But the man should have atleast, given the boy a chance. Yes, I know the corrupting his kids factor is high. But everyone deserves 2nd chance
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:40pm On Mar 13, 2020
The boy father reject am, uncle reject am, auntie reject am, you now want a innocent man to accept him

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by wisdomkid: 2:40pm On Mar 13, 2020
Shifi1:
take him to his father na
Yeah, she didn't mention the boy's father in her post.
But lets not forget. This is the same issue with Dele Alli of Tottenham FC today. If that boy embrace God and change for good... NO Sh*tty person should come and be claiming siblings, uncles, aunties and step father oh.

I pray he found the way of the Lord, live a good life and make it. It will be an interesting life story. Goodluck to the Mother, the step father (her husband) and the boy who everyone rejects.
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Deepthoughts: 2:40pm On Mar 13, 2020
Vyvyanvyvy:

I foot 70% of the bills , I pay my daughter school fee including my first child with my husband I pay half of her school fee ,all my son need is a place to stay, my husband won’t be the one paying his school fee
Please how do you make all that money?,n why can't you take the children bact to their biological father?,how are you sure that your present husband wouldn't maltreat the boy?,these are some of the reasons why it's very important to think deeply n to consider different scenarios before acting in every situation less we move from frying pan to fire.

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Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Oyindidi(f): 2:42pm On Mar 13, 2020
M00N:
The boy father reject am, uncle reject am, auntie reject am, you now want a innocent man to accept him
R is missing in your monikergrin add R inbetween the 2 O. That's what you are grin

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:43pm On Mar 13, 2020
Oyindidi:
This will make your balls(ego) bigger I guess. You go cry hot blood for my mentiongringrin

You be waka waka baby
Public vajayjay

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Deepthoughts: 2:43pm On Mar 13, 2020
Oyindidi:
Lol, men hate independent womengrin see as e dey pain you.

Modifiedgrin
O ye Nairaland men! cheesy I like the taste of your tears, keep crying in my mentiongrin
I said what I said with my chest grin
who colonized her?

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by deavicky(m): 2:44pm On Mar 13, 2020
Vyvyanvyvy:
I had 2 children. When I got married, my husband had none and accepted them like his own children.

Before marriage, we had discussed about the children living with us after marriage but that couldn’t be possible anymore because we were having financial problem so we couldn’t afford to move to a bigger apartment. We were staying in a room self contain with my daughter while my son was staying with my elder brother and his wife.

Now three years after we had moved to a bigger house still my husband doesn’t want my son to come and live with us. At the moment my son is going through hard times. My sister in law has been maltreating him to an extent that he has been stealing, he was caught and beaten like an animal. My brother said he doesn’t want him in his house again. He wants me to come and collect him.

I pleaded with my husband for me to bring him with us but he said no, he should stay there because he doesn't want him to damage our children. I’m angry at him I stopped talking to him and I don’t know where my son will go because I have no mother no father it’s only my elder brother and kid sister even my sister who is married doesn’t want him. I’m pained and in tears seeing my only son suffering while I’m still alive and I’m helpless to protect him.
every child should have a father, where is his own father. Or father's relatives.

1 Like

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