Giwoni:
genotype and blood group matched. We both Christians from Roman Catholic denomination We have discussed that so many times I'm not an osu.

I am dumbfounded!!

You will overcome. Finding the right partner is hard this days.

sucre:
Op my wife is ibo and I Akwa Ibom she turned down her family's request not to marry an Akwa Ibom man. Now we are 12 years in marriage.

Please please please move on and don't allow that said lady in your life. Yours is just around

Woah, wud love to learn Akwa ibom language plssss, ibibio in particular.

Well focus more on yourself, when she sees you are doing very well, without involving her in your life, she will come back and pls don't fall for it,just take it easy, time heals emotional injury, in few weeks time you will be alright.

Sorry bro. It is over.
On a petty note ask her to pay back every damn thing you gave her.

missimelda01:

I don't get you, the story is one sided.. what do you expect me to say

Shut up. It is not one side anything. Women don't know what they want, that's all.

I can bet my ball that it wasn't the girl's parents that said she can't marry an ebonyi man. She never had plans of marrying the Bobo. She just used that language as a legal yardstick to push the guy off.

Either she's seeing someone else that she feel is settled and serious or she never saw herself ending up with the OP. I guess she didn't just want to marry from that region.

Parents gat nothing to do with this.

Obidikejr:

Like bro, The guy is not wise at all at all.

abi..him fit do him own like DAT ni

Anambranians and Ebonyians are both Igbo. I don't understand why they can't marry each other.

Giwoni:
My Love Experience

Good day NLanders

I'm a medical student, and gf ( not sure what to call her now) is in MLS. We are both in same level (500l).

It all started in 2015, when we gained admission into the University. We began to read together and subsequently I started teaching her. Later on, she made me to read and susummarize her course topics (which I did for up to her 300 level) for her as she usually found it difficult to read with textbooks and understand the contents.

Months before my 2nd MBBS examinations, I began to notice changes in her attitude and behaviour towards me, up to the point that she told me that if I did not pass that examinations that, she will forget about me. But as God may have it, I passed successfully.

Financially, it started right in year one as I celebrated her and her mummy's Christmas from my own pocket. It got to a point that I usually give her her money almost every day (for up to 5yrs) Whenever, I'm traveling in any of our vacations, I usually give money for upkeep until I'm back.

In 300l, I bought her gift worth almost 30k and also celebrated her birthday which she demanded I get her 'point and kill cat fish' that cost 9k.

I usually pay for her textbooks and seminar work as we are all in medical school, I really do a lot for her, as she always told me she would never leave me right from yr 1 to 500l after which she started telling me, their people from Anambra will not let her marry people from Ebonyi State.

She's has known this for all her life, but decided to bring it up just now, when I'm beginning my marriage plans with her, She's started giving me unnecessary excuses in one form or the other.

In 400L, my elder brother told me that I should leave my medical school here to go and study the same medicine abroad. Because of her, I told him that I want to finish my school here since I am already in 400 level. That after my MBBS degree, I can then go abroad for my Masters degree...

This January, my elder brother told me that since I would be graduating in 2022 (which supposed to be 2021 but due to strike before the 2019 election) which is two years time, that I should be planning to get married before I leave this country.

This made me to ask her again if we are ending up together and she told me that she has to seek for her mother's consent, and would give me a feedback.

Before, she travelled (this is just before the lock down) as she was complaining that she does not have any money on her to eat and she want to go and learn how to plait hair which will cost her #8,000, I gave her #16,000. The next day after collecting the money, she told me that she received a call from her mother that she must come back to her State and she travelled with that money without learning anything.

Yesterday by 8:24pm, I called her to tell me the outcome of her mother's discussion with her. She told me that her mother insisted that she cannot marry an Ebonyi man, and she cannot go outside her mother's decision.

In conclusion, she told me that she cannot marry me.

Well, as expected, I'm bracing myself up for insults, (I really don't mind this right now) but amidst the insults, pls advice a brother who's fighting emotionally.

thanks

I need to flog sense into you.

Anambra people is most clannish when it comes marriage. Take heart bro. you will find true love soon, whether from anambra or otherwise.

stag:
I liked your neutral stance on the topic until I read this your reply to the guy who countered you...



You are rude.

Then I checked your profile. Only to find out you're even confused.

You sell wristwatches & other items but in your personal text, you're telling potential buyers not to send you PMs except you give them the permission to ??

What a joke.

Firstly, thanks for the bolded.

About the DM thingy, I'm sure you can read my signature clearly.. it has my business contact and Instagram handle for those interested in what I sell, you might not understand how difficult it is to respond to every PMs only for you to be asked silly questions, that is why I decided to make it easier by dropping my contact in my signature where people can see it without necessarily viewing my profile.

If she is not ready for marriage come and marry me oooo won’t disappoint you

missimelda01:
You only told us the things you did for her, what of the things she did for you?
Did you notice at any point in the relationship that she was acting uninterested?
Marriage is a huge step, did you both have marriage in view while dating?
Parents have huge influence on some people, maybe she's one of them.

In conclusion, it's not advisable to convince someone to marry you.. move on with your life, you'd find someone else who'll feel the same way about you.

Birds of the same feathers, get outta here.

comrChris:
who told you this? I'm from Afikpo, I can't count how many anambra women married to my place.
Even my brother married from anambra.

Op the girl never loved you, she just used Ebonyi as an excuse.. Move on

Offcourse there are exceptions. Just airing popular belief

Someone told you that if you fail your 2nd Mbbs exam she will leave you and you passed and continued with her


I swaer OP, this is were most of ur problems started from. Immediately u saw dat u have passed ur MBBS exams, u should have been giving her serious attitude den because she only love u with a/some conditions.

razible5384:
you lots will always device means to side ur likes,by trying to shift the goal post and playing the blame games, this is someone that has just been emotionally jilted an all u could do is to ask silly questions.... What else can she do for her order than sex which she does at her own volition

Please what is your problem? I clearly didn't choose sides, I only asked questions to get the full picture before passing my judgement but obviously even OP doesn't know what he wants in a woman.

Chi59:
Anambra people trended on twitter the other day.
My advice for anyone dating anambra person, if you're not from the place yourself is to see the person's people one on one and find out where you stand before you go any further.
They hardly marry non indigenes.

But that's not true though.

DoubleEngine007:
How will you even think of comparing women of those days to our present day girls?? Women of those days were disciplined ,but today we see the opposite among our young women .. I expected the guy your replied to give you a perfect reply to this insult ,your poured on his mom..But d guy didn't impress me at all.
Missimelda01 how could you compare women of,60s,70s,to these 90s/2000 set of ladies walking nude everywhere. Giving out their pussies,like the normal hand shake to anything that has deek,they come in contact with daily? How could you compare our mothers to this generation of girls ,who sell their destiny over a plate of pepper soup ,plate of rice or front seat of a car? Missimelda01 don't make that mistake again,because you just can't compare them.

Op ,ur matter just tire me seriously..Even if it was actually her mom's opinion to breakup with you,then her action would have even helped you a little to recover fast. But it's obvious the girl was using you all those times,but don't cry too much. She will get even worst of this same thing she did to you.
Hand go meet her,cux what goes around....

For all those saying she paid with sex.. Didn't she enjoy the sex more? Small time they will say they r not oloshos,but they collect money for sex on code. Any female who collect money for sex can be referred to as an...Olosho....also known as an.....Okpo.........
Now tell me ,who is deceiving who?

I want to correct something, I never insulted him.. I only reminded him that his mother is also a woman and when next he wants to make a statement about women, he should be careful not to generalise it. If I was asked the same question, I would gladly answer it.

Giwoni, plz, call my number, I have an idea... 07066222772

Op, you have done nothing wrong. You have learnt your love lesson. Rarely do people marry their first love. Your experience is one of the things you need to have before marriage. I have been in your shoes before. Mine was on religious grounds.

It would be hard to let go. You would cry. It will weigh you down. You will be disturbed psychologically and emotionally. Trust me, with time, it will fade and you start all over. Just try as much as possible to make her a friend. She would regret. My ex whom I thought I would marry still calls. I know how she feels. I know it would be hard for her to find someone like me. I met her a viirgin, our courtship was exceptional but I still left her virgin since that's her wish. I respected her.

Pick yourself up, dust your loving skills and find another lady. I believe you now know questions you need to ask before falling into the same shit. Trust me, you did your best for your ex. Your new courtship would be better off. What I have realized in my yeare of courtship is that, if you treat a woman right and you guys depart amicably, the next lady would be much better. You would be glad she left. Shoot your shot Doc.

Feed a dog for 3days and they will remember you for 3years,feed human being for 3years all u will hear is what have u done.....life is full of ups and down my brother....you are the only one in the relationship, and she's only using you as a means of survival to achieve her goal.... Although it's not easy,but i will only advice u to move on with your life....coz d more u try been hopeful,the more you get hurt and depressed...
This might eventually make u fail at school which could be more remorseful and regretful....

Summon courage,replace her, and move on....like once said it's not easy to take the decision,but u must take a risk that is worthwhile...

comrChris:
How did you come to conclusion that Ebonyi people are mentally unstable? Somebody that helps her academically is mentally unstable to you right? I'm from Afikpo and also a student in unizik, I can tell u no body I have come across in that school both in my class is smarter than me.
What's actually killing anambrians is pride, people are beginning to see it and they will regret it

ok mentally unstable doesn't apply to everyone from ebonyi state...but then everbody knows this so no need to argue it...imagine this idiot coming to tell us about how he bought point and kill for his babe

secondly am not from Anambra...infact i hate Anambra people with passion..those people are just plain foolish and selfish...that igbo people are bad and greedy is Anambra and mbaise...

so most times u just have to be careful when dealing with this two

O boy don't get too emotional. Yours will not be the first or last, move on with your life and forget about her. Don't rush into another relationship quickly, don't flash money as well in the new relationship, and don't make mistake in putting her into consideration in case she comes back. She will chop you bad, break your heart again, and leave you more emotional injured like never before. Remember, you will not be the first or the last to experience emotional breakdown.

Obviously the she was just in it for all the benefits she was getting, because if she loves u, she can convince her mom to see reasons with her..

My guy, sorry to hear this. As small comfort as it will be to you at this time, take heart that this has happened to the best of us.

As the saying goes, the best revenge you can have, is to live well.

All plans you have put aside, pick them up and run with them. Then go one step further. Focus on yourself, but do not isolate yourself. Don't come out of this a bitter man who will want to make the next woman you meet, pay for the "sins" of another. Remember, a woman is there to compliment you, but should not be your focus in life.

Make your career grow, be successful in life and attitude (I mean that don't let bitterness overtake you, it may blind you to your wife when she turns up) and enter this new phase of your life with a wiser outlook. Who knows, the guy/lady you may mentor tomorrow, is currently looking to date a girl/man who may find themselves in the position you found yourself and would appreciate your thoughts on how to go about things.

All the best and hope you become a guru doctor o! We need you guys more than ever, especially around this pandemic, and beyond that.

My brother, just look away and move on. Be grateful to God that you notice this early enough. Plz take your time and find another beautiful Medical student with a rich background in your faculty who will not be a liability.


Advise to young guys: Stop paying ladies school fees if she is not your wife. Majority of them turn out to be ungrateful.

The girl has been using you all along just that you were too blind to see. Saying her poor mom, who seeks financial help from a daughter she ought to be paying bills for through school, would not want her to marry you because of some ethnic reasons even though she knows the only reason why her daughter is still in school is because you care, is a fat lie. My mother say I cannot marry excuse, is a cooked story from her. Her conscience will not let her tell you directly to your face that she can't marry you, so using her moms story is a nice way of telling that. Now that you've know you've been played, stop been a fool. Seize all cash flow to her from you. Don't let your dime go her way. If she comes back begging, you can go ahead and fvck her for free as compensation. My guy build a stone heart towards her.

Doc let me start this way.
you made a big mistake putting your pure mind on this particular girl. if care is not taken, you didn't even get to paradise which is another big f. Up.

Real men don't trust girls, they play along with them until they see something futuristic possible. Most Anambra ladies are cool for marriage notwithstanding,but you should have found out the relationship between Anambra girls and Ebonyi guys. The truth is most Anambra girls I know wouldn't want to marry in Ebonyi based on family reasons, I don't know why kwanu.

Secondly, this so called lady told you it was going to be over between both of you if you failed your professional Examination, that should have been a clear indication that whatever affection she might have been showing was being faked. Because whoever loves someone would stand stronger beside the person in times of agony. Let me put it to you that, that girl was simply digging your gold. whatever good she was doing you was just to reciprocate your spendings on her, they weren't really genuine.

But since things are already the way they are, I wouldn't want you to convince her into marrying you as it might be counterproductive in future if she accepts, rather just forget about her. Take her as an indigent person you were helping in school, then look for a better person, after all you're a doctor & doctors by nature are ladies' guys. you know what I mean. Yeah, pain is always associated with losing a loved one but there's no time dwelling on that especially considering the kind of person involved.

My suggestion then is, since you're not the only son and not terminally ill, you shouldn't be in so much hurry getting married and you shouldn't rush into any other relationship so soon to feel up the vacuum. Settle down yet, reflect on the past, meditate on the kind of woman you want, talk things over with your brother, even if you don't finally find a person to marry here before Leaving, if you get there you'll definitely find good well meaning Nigerian ladies who will love you unconditionally. this is my Candid advice.

This is the highest highest of mumuthology.

Chi59:

Anambra people hardly marry other ibo people, except enugu. They're very selective and no matter the love, they must first of all get their parents approval. I once loved an anambra man. The rest is history
Infact if i ever come across an anambra guy toasting me again, I jump and pass. Let them marry themselves.

Lol. Na Yoruba u go marry laslas. You're from which state?

I’ve always avoided engaging in issues like this one but I’ll make an exception for you.

Bro you’re too good for this young lady, and she doesn’t deserve you one bit. That BS about not marrying someone from Ebonyi is a ruse. Eventually you will discover the real reason is that she either has someone else or, she doesn’t love you and is making up excuses- which is better than ending up with her and being miserable.

Move on okay, you sound like a nice chap with potential, and trust me there are too many girls out there waiting to make you happy beyond your wildest dreams, go ahead and find them.

He's done all the spending in good faith. You win some you lose some. He loved and still loves this girl. Look my dad is from Anambra State. He met my mum completely broke ...guess what? while at the MED school too. My mum supported my dad through his medical school. My mum isnt Nigerian for a starter and they both went through a lot and all the carry on from Anambra why my dad should stick to his own. Luckily they've been married for nearly 50yrs.

It's sad but what I get from Anambra is a people non -conforming to culture outside theirs. I think that is changing a bit and as proud Anambra man I will advise this guy to stay strong and fight for his love....well his love; that's if she truly loves him. I will do anything for someone I love and care about. She's his life and he could help her and happy to do so. That's what my mum done to my dad...from Anambra state! It can go either way and value is so objective and non relative. It stands true in every situation or cultures