₦airaland Forum

funmisticqueen2:
you can't afford the 'olosho' biz i do.

No need.

travelland:
You're already getting worked up sir please deal with your anger issues

funmisticqueen2:
breast feeding is work o.

Shuuu!

emmaodet:
Hmmmmmmmm
Even though you are right, the society really frown against a man separating from a woman apart from the excuse of infidelity. They will mock you that you are not man 3enough and not in charge of your home. That is the major reason most men stay in toxic marriages.
And just like most women, instead of them quitting an abusive marriage, they will start flirting with their bestie or a man on line and sleep with them. I guess it is a human thing.
Ever heard of a popular saying about women - A shoulder to cry on is a dick to ride on

m140:
One can if you one got some to spare, not last kobo or money not in excess

Naughtysite:
What other going out do you want him to do ?

Someone who works for federal govt.

By the way, what do you do for a living ??

ademidedavid:
It's no longer a story that pastors divorce their partners, imams divorce their partners, highly educated people do same and even the so called marriage counsellors are not left out in the order of the day and it has always been a thing of worry for me with the thought that they never loved each other before marriage but getting married has changed my thinking and has made me realised that marriage only takes the grace of God to work out.

I have been married for 3 years with 1 beautiful daughter with a loving wife (maybe before and some years into the marriage). I have always believed that I cannever raise my hand on my woman since my father never did such but I find it hard to believe I did the unimaginable today although It wasn't intentional.

It was due to annoyance after she asked me to stop sitting at home and go work for more money like other men even though I am a federal worker with above 100k monthly income and still do personal work as a civil engineer apart from the federal job despite the lockdown.....

It really got me aggravated because I have been the one fending for the family and the kid for the past 3 years and never asked for a kobo from her.....

Although I have noticed the urge for very flamboyant life style in her lately and has even asked me to get more money at any means, that money is everything in this life even though I have tried telling her its a gradual process, she still doesn't listen and even asked me to raise money for her to travel out of Nigeria.

I have never thought of raising my hands on any woman let alone my wife.....

Please how do I change her sudden mentality towards this sudden extravagant life style because I pray it doesn't lead to something else since I can't do illegal things to acquire the type of wealth she dreams of?

Poorboy:
yes what I mean is impressing a woman in a relationship is bad business, I give random girl that genuinely needs help 20k,10k 5k nothing attached.

And it's only if I feel like.

My issue is with entitlement mentality, you came to marry me you must provide food for me, give me money, buy latest clothes for me, I suppose to drive car now.

I don't entertain such because it will only end in tears.


As a man

Provide food to the best of your ability

Buy your wife clothes to the best of your ability

Give her money, only what you can afford

Don't take your wife as an investment, so you don't cry later.

Women can be deceived anytime to leave you either by friends or family especially if you are still trying to make it like op.

ademidedavid:
It's no longer a story..

m140:
Cus of the bolded am always ready

ademidedavid:
She's into her own business......that's my only regret, I wish I never raised my hands on her.

Poorboy:
that means you're a wise man

Olumyyde:
My brother, it has happened already, no need crying over spilt milk, just forge ahead.
Make ur wife understand life is more real than flamboyance n social media fake life. If she still doesn't see things clearly, then it's a toxic relationship which isn't good for ur health. Bro, ur happiness and peace ain't negotiable. GOD bless you sir.

meetme01:
You don F-up. Raising your hands on any woman talkless your wife has degraded you. That's the bitter truth.

Back to the main issue. Your wife needs your unreserved apology. You need remorseful which is through your attitude. Let her know you are deeply sorry.

To her, is she not working? Why have you refused to set her up in a biz? One problem I have realized in today's marriage is, finance. It's really creating a lot of issues in most marriage. As a man, if you earn from three sources, declare only two. Let her know how the money is spent to the last kobo. That was the initial problem, you need to fix that part asap

Naughtysite:
What other going out do you want him to do ?

Someone who works for federal govt.

By the way, what do you do for a living ??

LegitGirl:
You’re not a serious person. You’re not the talking type... what are you then, the beating type?

Nonsense and ingredients! Coward!

Poorboy:
Broke man ,broke man if her father is not broke will she be totally dependent on you.

How old is she?

Is she educated?

Does she have a job?

Is the other sisters married and doing well than you people?

Is she from a wealthy home, like she is used to comfort already?

Which state do you reside?

See you cannot satisfy greed, your wife is a greedy person. How can your wife ask you to look for money for her to travel out then you feel you have a wife.

Work on your emotions don't allow the term wife to make you try to impress, if you put yourself in unnecessary pressure to make money and die before your burial another man will already be sleeping with her. She is the money type.

Tell people the truth and let them know their worth, I once told my fiancee I am not your responsibility, if you can't survive quit.

Don't regret beating her, though I don't subscribe to that.

ademidedavid:
She's into her own business......that's my only regret, I wish I never raised my hands on her.

travelland:
Mr cautioner, hope you don't continue this way, if your wife can't tell you to go out and hustle I wonder who can encourage you in this life

travelland:
It's good know that you work but if you're generous with her and your kid she won't insist that you should hustle for more. I don't want to believe that she's a wicked person as you paint her to be. It's because you're not giving enough and she's probably finding it hard to continue keeping quiet. Most women want their husbands around the house not outdoors all the time unless he's not doing enough financially. Let her also work to cater for her needs too but if you're the stingy type also try adjusting. Stop cautioning with your hands, she's not a Goat

Mariangeles:
You're seeing things that aren't there!
Your type can accuse one wrongly!

Skepticus:
When you tell men to completely abandon marriage/dating and go their own way when they CAN'T find a woman that meets 90% of marriage material, they'll start screaming INCEL. The kids these men seek can be gotten outside the rigid confines of the business contract called marriage.

Then, they go ahead to lower their standards in picking these women, ending up marrying the worst of women and enabling their bad behaviour.

Chiomsies:
Oga,being a real man entails self control, all women are the same o they have power in the mouth and most times don't mean what they say,you should never have raised your hand on a woman,wife or not. That said, please apologize to your wife and have a talk with her,fighting gets you no where and don't be deceived that a another wife will do better.
Please don't lay your hands on. Any woman ever again

ademidedavid:
It's no longer a story that pastors divorce their partners, imams divorce their partners, highly educated people do same and even the so called marriage counsellors are not left out in the order of the day and it has always been a thing of worry for me with the thought that they never loved each other before marriage but getting married has changed my thinking and has made me realised that marriage only takes the grace of God to work out.

I have been married for 3 years with 1 beautiful daughter with a loving wife (maybe before and some years into the marriage). I have always believed that I cannever raise my hand on my woman since my father never did such but I find it hard to believe I did the unimaginable today although It wasn't intentional.

It was due to annoyance after she asked me to stop sitting at home and go work for more money like other men even though I am a federal worker with above 100k monthly income and still do personal work as a civil engineer apart from the federal job despite the lockdown.....

It really got me aggravated because I have been the one fending for the family and the kid for the past 3 years and never asked for a kobo from her.....

Although I have noticed the urge for very flamboyant life style in her lately and has even asked me to get more money at any means, that money is everything in this life even though I have tried telling her its a gradual process, she still doesn't listen and even asked me to raise money for her to travel out of Nigeria.

I have never thought of raising my hands on any woman let alone my wife.....

Please how do I change her sudden mentality towards this sudden extravagant life style because I pray it doesn't lead to something else since I can't do illegal things to acquire the type of wealth she dreams of?

m140:
Easier said than done.

Kingrefreshed:
HOW CAN I LIKE YOUR COMMENT TWICE?

m140:
I tell my wife , na lazy man go dey fear make woman no leave am. I no fit come die, make you get money like shekere, even sabi in the other room like werey, if them go leave , they will. If my best ain't enough pack your load.

funmisticqueen2:
while you have a point, any man that wants to start a family with me, should promise to provide for and protect him while i nuture him and the family.

Part of provision is at least yearly trips abroad and enough funds to ensure a lasting legacy for his children.

That's not too much to ask for, or are you that mediocre.