Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.

I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.

This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have been planning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isn't going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.

Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (She is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.

Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian.

Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.

Patiently reading.

Chat me on whatsapp, don't pay shiit to anyone. I'll show you what to concentrate on if you want to learn website development. I charge a minimum of $250 (112k) for a single website with 5 pages built with WordPress. Lots of reviews on Fiverr, skill sells, if you give it time which I don't you can earn $3k a month. I'll not respond to anyone that's not the OP please, if you're not the op and contact me on whatsapp you're on your own

chiomaP:

Do you mean sponsored page?

Something like that, a targeted post to promote a product on your fb page. You can easily place a targeted campaign and it will give you a good return if done right.

grossintel:
Chat me on whatsapp, don't pay shiit to anyone. I'll show you what to concentrate on if you want to learn website development. I charge a minimum of $250 (112k) for a single website with 5 pages built with WordPress. Lots of reviews on Fiverr, skill sells, if you give it time which I don't you can earn $3k a month. I'll not respond to anyone that's not the OP please, if you're not the op and contact me on whatsapp you're on your own

Sorry, What level are you on fiverr ?

Heryormilekan:


Sorry, What level are you on fiverr ?

Level ke? I stopped having level since 2 years ago. Buyers don't check that anymore, it's reviews they want to see and the projects you've done.

chiomaP:
Dear op, 80k isn't a small amount at all, as you have been advised get a skill , improve yourself..be a better you,o finished serving this year,all through my youth service I kept saving ,I received 25k from my PPA + my allawee,I saved up and started importation business,I didn't wait for any white collar job because I know they're none,yes I'm a lady,that just clocked 23, that's supposed to be concerned with material things, but that didn't stop me from doing something little for myself,my business is still going, atleast I don't have to ask a dime for any man..So please don't feel pressured and be a better you.

Do you mean mini importation? As in Aliexpress?

grossintel:
Level ke? I stopped having level since 2 years ago. Buyers don't check that anymore, it's reviews they want to see and the projects you've done.

That's true reviews goes a long way but levels build trust too

well, our case is almost identical but the only differences is that, I already married to her before they start showing there real skin colour to me....my monthly salary is 80k (level 10) plus this yearly office traveling that I used to involve myself each year by force so to pleased her, sometime I can get 250,000 or 500,000...and she is the one that always benefit more than 70% out of our earnings, but her parent will pretend as if they don't see my effort, always complaining of me not greeting them or something like that.

and I forgot to tell you that she is not doing anything which is common within my side (north),and she is from a poor family, semi literate, no skills but she is a great cook anyway and beautiful. so my advice to you is that try and marry the girl if possible then later u can ignored them. this is Nigeria my brother, there sense of humor is totally different from the outside .world

Afikoo:
.

I am 32. I have been working for 7 years here. Also working while in school. Just finished last year and got a pay rise to 80k as security administrator.

Baba, my issue isn't the marriage. My issue is the money. I am desperately asking on how best improve my income. Concrete suggestions on what I need to lay my hands on now to get started. I am tire of submitting applications

it's just a pity we men don't realise what we have until it lost, now if you ask me I will tell you 80k monthly salary is not that bad,my question for you is that at 32 why rushing into marriage,if you must married at 32 must you marry a jobless woman,must the parent of the girl been the one to tell you when to call them? Don't tell me you love her or you can't do without her o because the moment you can't provide for her she will do without you.80 percent of Nigerian married women of to day are into extra marital affairs with okada men,Maruwa riders and meat sellers for favour,my advice for you is if you must marry at 32 marry someone who has a job and ready to settle down now with you not someone who will be controlled by her family and too young to take decision on her own.i repeat don't marry a jobless woman.

Escabado:
[color=#770077][/color]

A man earning 80k is very good and right to get married. Your woman is a materialistic woman and so is her family. If her elder brother thinks u are not doing well , he should assit you with some money to start something that suits him. Pls man up . Don't allow them determine for you , other wise they will be the one controlling the marriage. U need to dump that girl and find a better girl. Imagine a jobless girl complaining about your income. She should go and work to make money too .

most of our men can't see beyond their nose, reason we have high rate of sudden death of men this days, for how long our men will continue marrying jobless woman? And they will be the one spending 80percent of the salary .

Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.

I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.

This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have been planning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isn't going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.

Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (She is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.

Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian.

Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.

Patiently reading.

But the topic was discussed few weeks ago on how to become somebody from nobody. Most people suggested yahoo business others say leave the country if you dont know anybody that knows somebody. Truth, Buhari govt is not helping matters and it might get worst from the look of things. Suspend marriage bro, 80k no go reach anywhere, start aiming 300k a month, or save and leave the country simple. Alternatively, look for banker and marry, use her get loan and multiplly ur income. However, i dont support depending on woman for anything.. Go hustle, security work is lazy man work. Use ur extra time enter online and and learn something.

wallahi my brother you are absolutely right ..this experience na panful one. I dey experience the same thing and now we already got 2 kids.

You have a problem n seem focused on only one way to fix the problem. A 80K paying job with with just BSc is a OK whatever you like or do you best option is to suspend your marriage plans indefinitely till you get a beta paying job or get a beta source of income.

The problem is marrying with an income that can not sustain the marriage. You might want to ignore that fact but that is your only problem. How to increase / improve your income is not the problem. Hopefully, as someone wise enough to have started working 7 years ago you also have the intelligence to understand you were doing fine with less pay until the story of a jobless partner came up n I said this cos am married to a wife who do not work but that is because I have enough n more for the 2 of us glory to God.

I remember telling the girl who was eager to marry me some 5 years back that I wasn't ready to marry next year or even next 2 years and am talking about a girl comfortable enough to buy herself a tokunbo Corolla for Uber while she drives a Lexus jeep. A word they say is enough 4 the wise.

Afikoo:
.

I am 32. I have been working for 7 years here. Also working while in school. Just finished last year and got a pay rise to 80k as security administrator.

Baba, my issue isn't the marriage. My issue is the money. I am desperately asking on how best improve my income. Concrete suggestions on what I need to lay my hands on now to get started. I am tire of submitting applications

bigbossila:
wallahi my brother you are absolutely right ..this experience na panful one. I dey experience the same thing and now we already got 2 kids.

Life is a experience sha, Just find a good job, or learn a new skills, it will be helpful a lot, 80k is nothing in Nigeria now, Daily expenses and many other mouth to feed is alarmy, for the aspect of your inlaw or mother complaining just try to find excuse for them, will they send you card for you to call them, I don't think so, do they know how you live your life, I don't think so, so just take it easy. Marriage is like party come and eat and go, after the marriage nobody will call you, so just find a way to make the marriage ceremony affordable for yourself, and save a lot for after because there is more expenses coming, get a good job that pay .... there are many listed in nairaland.. already.. Good luck..

Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.

I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.

This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have been planning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isn't going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.

Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (She is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.

Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian.

Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.

Patiently reading.

Is she a graduate?

This your condition is not because of village people or because you are lazy .


Our leaders are the cause of it.

Think digital.
Write a history related book.

You think it is but it's not. I was once faced with your dilemma but relate freely with girls that appear reasonable n modest in your hood online or offline. Do it needlessly n ceaselessly among the lot you will find a geniune worthy to be your queen, you can then brush her up to your taste.

Don't go n marry olosho on Tinder or NL that seem like ready made barbie dolls but the more freely u associate the easier it is to differentiate them. Like making money you need to devote your time n resource to find a good girl worthy of marriage now n that does not guarantee a happy ending but man can only try but with God on your side, good reasoning, careful n detailed observation your effort should be crowned with enduring success in marriage.

LikeAking:
Make una help dis guy condition, that what he wants...

Show him d way.

Not relationship advice.

Most of you talking about making more money are guys under 20, una never see anything. The highest biz you have done is Bitcoin.

Dat one carry him on problem.

To make money is not as fast as you think.

The biggest mistake I made in my life was not finding a babe I truly love when I was under 21. I was not serious with babes and focused on money..

Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.

I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.

This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have been planning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isn't going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.

Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (She is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.

Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian.

Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.

Patiently reading.

Are you sure you want to marry into this vindictive family? The best time to find true love is when you are unemployed or underemployed. Please let this family be and seek for true love that is void of financial bias. You should channel your energy into learning new skills and adding value to your life and not being with a family that would make you feel less of a man. All the best!

pretydiva:
I think you should suspend the wedding, then you both work on your income. Things are pretty hard these days
You both should be financially buoyant before venturing into marriage

You are right dear. However, her mother and brother's disposition to things is a problem for me. They are fair weather in-laws and unless he becomes and stays successful, he would keep having issues with them.

thesicilian:
With the marriage plans, it seems you were heading into the life of the average Nigerian family man living daily from hand to mouth and praying fervently for the next day's meal. Thank God for your girlfriend and in-laws who God has used to redeem you (whether their intentions are genuine or not).

My advice to you is that you should invest most of your salary into marketable skills, keep your certificates aside for now. Learn a skill that you know can set you up within 6months to 1yr and then start your own business based on that skill. It could be in IT, Real estate, engineering, construction, general grade, etc, just something with good potentials that God can bless for you.

You do not believe in humble begunnings?

FanOfMyself:
I can teach you web development

please I need your contact.

FanOfMyself:

09074191547

am interested 2

Afikoo:
.

Kindly drop your contact. Let's WhatsApp

08056003865

yomi007k:
Brother. Go for thanksgiving.

The OP probably don’t know how deep this simple advice is.

Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.

I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.

This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have been planning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isn't going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.

Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (She is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.

Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian.

Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.

Patiently reading.

why do you wanna marry from a broke family bro?
your 80k salary is pretty decent, it's the girl that doesn't have a job but learning a skill or whatever you call it I'm worried about. from the family's reaction it's obvious they are poor, that's why they are worried about you been the only one working. why do you wanna marry a jobless girl I ask again....my friend break up with the broke ass and look for a working class girl that earns atleast same 80k as u and settle down well. don't come and suffer o

Dangrace01:


How do one get spiritual backup

ask around u if u can locate any sabbate church in ur area , and d sabbate church am talking about is not 7days adventist , go to d church , meet d prophet incharge , make sure u do what ever he told u , and i promise u dat u will see change in ur life in less dan 2weeks.

Sixfeetbelle:


And who told you we don't want that too?


We'd take that over this stress we're going through just to be called an adult. We'll take everything on this table except the notion of fifth wife sha ooh.

We don't like sharing our man with other women. Shouldn't you guys be aware of this by now?

After several years of olosho run on n off Tinder FB Instagram Badoo Codedruns n Co.

Bro,.. You're good to go! Dont get worked up because of what her family is saying. It all depends on her, there are people who earn less, get married, and they also do well. So pls, don't feel less of a man because of this. Well-done, in as much you're also on track to a better life. Keep it up! So, talk with her, it all balls down to both of you, and if she's not wanting to pull through with you, then pls just let her go! I've known so many eye and mighty men, so boxed up, rich and all of a sudden after 2 years of marriage... All gone! So, 80k monthly is a good starting point.[color=#000099][/color]

ibechris:
If u are below 32 dont bother getting married.

Reason is,marriage will worsen ur problem and poverty will further wreck u both physically and mentally.

As the matter is now,what u need most is not an emotional laden women but a working class women so as to improve ur income.

Alternatively,u could as well suspend marriage for another five years if u are less than 31 so that by age 35,u must have saved aggressively in other to invest in some stuffs.


Do not say u have invested so much in that relationship else u might be settling for the worst. In this age and time,love without money is miserable and can kill faster than otapiapia.

Let me use myself as an example:
I was born into poverty,in fact my father worked as a security man for 22 years to ensure we all went to school. Although those days were better compared to this period.

During this time my mum was a complete house wife which I would never advice any woman except if her husband is rich.

To cut the long story short,after school i moved out of the house and i secured a bank job where i was earning a meagre #49,000 as salary and that later changed to #80,000 before I moved away from that job to another one.
However, when i met my wife i ensured she must be working because i was and still the bread winner of my family,and we moved on got married after 6 years our hard work and combined efforts paid off that we can boost of cash and asset worth 40million.

That is because both of us leverage on our jobs to create additional income streams...of which that is what u should be focusing on and not on a woman that isn't doing anything. Except for the rich who can afford to marry a liability as a wife.

At 37 I can afford to pay 250k termly for my children school fees without even touching my salary.

Waning:
To those who might perceived this as a means to boost my ego,pls disregard as it is just a piece of advice to encourage a brother.



That family will even wreck u before ur time,marry a working class. Love will disappear when u dont do the right thing.

Wish u the best.

Hello sir, please help a sister, God bless you sir......

Lawsaite:


Sir Please what are some areas that you had invested into?

With my experience in banking together with my wife,we do micro and macro lending to sure businesses and contract.

yomi007k:


The lady dictating terms and conditions to him doesnt have a job.

I pity men that dont think. Their lifespan is usually shortened.

Some ladies are wonderful, a friend of mine is receiving 70k and the wife earns over 200k but she won't make noise nor dictate things, she allows my friend to lead and they are Just fine. Many ladies are quietly doing wonders but won't talk in the public, thank you.

FanOfMyself:

okay, you have a computer system? are you ready to dedicate at least 4 hours everyday to learn and practice? and finally you have to pay just a token to purchase the training courses (in video formats)? four courses to bring you from novice to intermediate level, each course will cost you 2k totaling 8k. Then I will be giving you exercises and mini projects to do after the first three courses. I will be available to answer ALL of your questions. I will link you up with other students learning under me so that you guys can stay motivated. let me know if you are in....They good thing is that you will still keep your job at least until when you have become an expert and start working full time as a software developer

Interested in this please

Your experience is similar to mine just that my wife works too. I've been earning 89k for over 5years and my wife earns btw 35 and 50k every month and we are both graduates. The truth is we cut our coats far below our sizes. Outsiders life doesn't influence us but we admire them though.
The truth is, she has been very supportive and understanding. We live happily with our 3 years old boy.
My point is you need a woman who understands what it takes to be in marriage. Even when there is surplus and scarcity. Sit her down and you guys should draw out plans. Don't force her at all if she refuses. Just move on