Gerrard59:


Don't mind them. You are dealing with Nigerians who are largely ignorant about how women are. These people think the average woman will use her money in majority of situations, worse still a modern African woman. Ask him if he can marry a woman who has more money than he does, na voicemail him go enter.

bro I don’t know if only me believes in this; the feelings or respect you have when u never ever asks assistance from women neither do you expect one .... And meeting about 60% of their sensible demands ( of course you decline some ) .... You will get to a stage where women petty demands are insignificant.... Make God no shame men jare

Demmy60004:
You can learn another skill that has nothing to do with school. People are learning skills this year. You could follow your girlfriend and learn Copywriting (one of the high income skills now) and the good thing is I'm sharing free tips on how to start and it's starting on Monday, 23rd of November
Join the group
https:///J6q6EMN8Srx8iGs5ciy1RS

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Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.
I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.
This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have beenplanning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isnt going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.
Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (she is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.
Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian. Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.
Patiently reading.

. Your own is better you have 80k to manage monthly what about those who are not seeing anything at all, as for the girl just think about how to make it oo what most families wants now is rich in-law if she wanna go please let her there is always another woman out there,sounds like you are still young to know that these thing call love don't work without money so get money first mehn.

alexmakaay:


Mister I hope it's not what I'm thinking .? Cos your case is familiar.

.

I will like to hear your own story bro

YungBlacMale:
The family wants a man that'll alleviate them from poverty....



Oga leave that girl and her family, if not......... u're heading to premium tears.

This kind of girl can leave you for another man and the family will support.
Don't tell me u want this type of in-laws

lol
If na me ahhh
I will tell the guy to his face to marry her sister.

durasome:
. Your own is better you have 80k to manage monthly what about those who are not seeing anything at all, as for the girl just think about how to make it oo what most families wants now is rich in-law if she wanna go please let her there is always another woman out there,sounds like you are still young to know that these thing call love don't work without money so get money first mehn.

.

She is not going. She is advising me to suspend the marriage and let's work to improve our income. Both of us.
Now I am just confuse it I am to just ignore the relationship and focus on myself or get someone that'd is equally earning.

While 80k is not really high, it is not abominable for marriage either...i find It strange that people(most)are shouting"go look for money first,focus on money",I will bet my balls that they(some)don't have such regular amount coming in monthly...because others are talking, they also want to feel among.

Op,it's is alright to try n increase or better your income, but don't think the money is not enough for starters(just you n wife)most of those niggars talking up n down there will kill to be in your position...see them rushing for N-power n u will understand.

Afikoo:
.

She is not going. She is advising me to suspend the marriage and let's work to improve our income. Both of us.
Now I am just confuse it I am to just ignore the relationship and focus on myself or get someone that'd is equally earning.

she give u legit advice about u two improving on ur incomes and u saying u are confused.na wao
is it under this current buhari regime that one onion that is smaller than tangerine is sold for 1500 naira dat u want to marry a woman with 80K?
biko dont let ur kids start swearing for u when u born them into abject poverty
try improve on the income
i wont be shocked with this income u probably staying in a place like abuja or lagos

You and your girl had planned something, even met her parents.

One call to her brother and everything scattered. The elder brother is trouble

Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.
I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.
This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have beenplanning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isnt going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.
Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (she is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.
Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian. Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.
Patiently reading.

Bros oh, you graduated last year, (age regardless) and you started earning 80k a month and you thought it right to get married?

I know you've been brainwashed into believing the moment you get married, boom you'd be rich,favored by many men. Forget all what those pastors tell you. It's kind of like a doctrine they're in... don't wanna go there.

Point is, why not sit down, start investing, invest wisely, little by little... And it has to be something you are to do yourself and also learn from it as tow when you will go big into it.

Marriage shouldn't come next after getting a job. No!

Afikoo:
.

She is not going. She is advising me to suspend the marriage and let's work to improve our income. Both of us.
Now I am just confuse it I am to just ignore the relationship and focus on myself or get someone that'd is equally earning.

Everything was going fine, everybody was happy, suddenly something changed. What changed?

How old is your girlfriend?

Afikoo:
.

I am 32. I have been working for 7 years here. Also working while in school. Just finished last year and got a pay rise to 80k as security administrator.

Baba, my issue isn't the marriage. My issue is the money. I am desperately asking on how best improve my income. Concrete suggestions on what I need to lay my hands on now to get started. I am tire of submitting applications

32. Hmm. Life is hard.

Afikoo:
Please can we focus our energy now on making money.
Please suggest best possible ways I can help my financial situation

I can see that you are so much in love with your girl. But, do not let her and her family lead you to ruins. I can sense desperation all over your posts.

UyaiIncomparabl:


32. Hmm. Life is hard.

The 32 took me by shock. Nigeria na useless country sha. 7yrs in the labour market with 80k salary. Kai!!!

Abeg change your dp.

Let me tell you the gospel truth.

You are a less man, therefore, you have to "man up".

What is actually affecting you is low self esteem. 80k salary is not a small money. Monthly for that matter.

How much are civil servants receiving?

Or is it the name of the work you do that is getting you down casted? "Security administrator?" SECURITY!

With 80k monthly, I can rule my World, even marry and control that Obama only daughter.

Effulgent:


Boss, shey make I message you?

I wan yarn you something for whatsapp

Feel free to contact me on WhatsApp. My number is up there in one of the comments

pocohantas:


The 32 took me by shock. Nigeria na useless country sha. 7yrs in the labour market with 80k salary. Kai!!!

Abeg change your dp.

Honestly, it's a sad reality. With that age, does he even have prospects of getting better jobs? Now that the age limits to applying for a job are under 28?

I just hope he scales through this phase. 80K na small thing, since the girl hasn't even started earning. They will be living in tight finances. The best thing will be for both of them to work on getting a sustainable income.

Kenmatt:
Let me tell you the gospel truth.

You are a less man, therefore, you have to "man up".

What is actually affecting you is low self esteem. 80k salary is not a small money. Monthly for that matter.

How much are civil servants receiving?

Or is it the name of the work you do that is getting you down casted? "Security administrator?" SECURITY!

With 80k monthly, I can rule my World, even marry and control that Obama only daughter.

Tell me more.

Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.
I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.
This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have beenplanning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isnt going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.
Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (she is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.
Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian. Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.
Patiently reading.

My small advice is for to leave those useless family and their call problem and move on, if I were you that’s what I will do

UyaiIncomparabl:


Tell me more.

Yes nah.

And I mean every single alphabet in that sentence.

Afikoo:


Of course I have suspended it.

I am working earning 80k. I need more. I have tried.
That's the last kart of my tweet comes in place.

How can one get out of this average life. I need a better job

80k is not a bad start to be honest. And yes, at 32 you should be thinking in the direction of marriage whether your income improves or not.

Of course, you should be thinking about increasing your income and while at it, be thankful that you have a 80k job, especially from a Church. I'm even surprised that a church offered you that amount. That's like the average salary of L. 07/08 graduates in many MDAs and state governments in Nigeria, including Lagos state.

Be thankful and check for investment/savings opportunities around you. Join a cooperative society, save, invest, save, and spend wisely.

The decision to get married should not necessarily be about your monthly figures. Some people earn 50k but already have their 10 year rent saved somewhere. They will never beg you for money yet they don't earn much on a monthly basis. You can secure your future with that figure if you apply wisdom.

Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.
I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.
This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have beenplanning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isnt going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.
Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (she is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.
Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian. Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.
Patiently reading.

80k sounds big but it's like 30k three years ago. Just talk with her and know what's up.

bro,
look for a problem to solve.
no business is menial.
do you love to wash, start a laundry
do u like to clean, start to help people clean their houses.
do you like running errands, do it for busy people.

start a business. most offices closed down during covid.
with the covid experience, most business are going online
and i have seen someone offering to teach you web design.
grab it.

build yourself. most mistake we make is rushing into marriage
and live an average life with no money to build yourself.

for your in-laws, you are in for some deep issues so have a re-think.

Afikoo:
.

She is not going. She is advising me to suspend the marriage and let's work to improve our income. Both of us.
Now I am just confuse it I am to just ignore the relationship and focus on myself or get someone that'd is equally earning.

1. How much does she earn monthly? If none, she's the one whose finance needs to improve.

2. Do u have any business idea or have u any skill(handwork)? If not, try to learn one and save some cash to fund a business relating to that or try to save up and open up a business (e.g, saloon, restaurant, photo studio etc) close to your house or work place so to b able to monitor it 1st hand to avoid stories that touch.

3. Are u sure u are not under pressure by the family to become rich overnight? Biggest mistake u will ever make its wanting to make money just to impress anybody, u should make money for U. Dont allow any body put much pressure on you, else u kill ursef for nothing.

4. How's her attitude lately, I mean ur Girlfriend? Has there been any unusual attitude from her. If there is, then I suspect she's seeing some other guy, most times women like to keep substitute(s) especially when they due for marriage. Eventually u found out she's seeing someone, I'll advise u let her be, u will do yourself more harm when u think u can fight and win her back. If she isn't seeing anyone, then u sit her down and let her know the qualities u will want ur wife to posses, whether as a working class or house wife.


5. Stop being weak and take charge of your relationship, don't allow anybody intimidate u (e.g her brother) or rush u into marriage (e.g ur pastors)....
Haillings

Afikoo:
Good morning Nairalanders. I sure know you all fine.
I am writing this with heavy heart.
I know we have super rich people here who rose from poverty to riches.
This life isn't balance. Done with school. Been working as security administrator in my church and I earn 80k. I have beenplanning on getting married. Have met my fiance Parents, they were happy. I have engaged her she is happy. All of a sudden the elder brother who isn't around is angry that I haven't spoken to him about my intention. I have earlier tried his line severallly and it isnt going through. Had to chat him and he told me I am not serious that I should grow up. A bullet in my heart.
Her mum has suddenly changed and is accusing me for not calling her always.
This whole drama has gotten into my babe now she is talking about us suspending our marriage plan and try improving our income. (she is learning a skill)

I am fed up. Have suspended everything now. I have tried everything since I left school last year to improve my income. Apply for jobs here and there. Is just not cutting in.
Please, share your experience on how you were able to get out of this average life as a Nigerian. Advise me and others still struggling to rise up.
You can recommend jobs for me.
I studied history and Diplomatic Studies.
Have some certification in Leadership and human resource. Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.
Patiently reading.

To be frank with you, she isn't meant for you. Just so you know doubling you current income may not even be deemed enough by her and her people. Go and get another girl and leave her alone. All that crap they gave you all comes down to $$ and they won't hesitate to toss you if a guy with a deeper pocket come knocking. The earlier you get this the better.

FanOfMyself:
I can teach you web development

Please is it possible for one without a laptop to learn web dev?

Dear OP, if she loves you and believe in you, the marriage is doable as no condition is permanent. Both of you should definitely be working on how to improve your lives as self development is key as an individual that seeks growth.
I was on the same income level with my hubby when we started courting. I am the career oriented person, I was also seeking better opportunities. I got a job that pays twice my husband's income few weeks to our wedding so instead of me fighting him for an instant change, I hustled for myself as he has other areas of core competences beyond white collars jobs.
Please focus on you and you'll meet someone that will grow with you and propel your growth.

themaestro08:


Please is it possible for one without a laptop to learn web dev?

No bro, you have to get a computer system first

Afikoo:
Trust me, I can deliver on anything legal. I have the capacity, but haven't gotten the opportunity.
Patiently reading.

PM, I've got something you should take a look at. I honestly don't know if this is for you, but it's worth taking a look. PS: It's legit.

Kenmatt:


Yes nah.

And I mean every single alphabet in that sentence.

I have learned to stop taking chest beaters like you, especially on an online forum seriously.

UyaiIncomparabl:



Honestly, it's a sad reality. With that age, does he even have prospects of getting better jobs? Now that the age limits to applying for a job are under 28?

I just hope he scales through this phase. 80K na small thing, since the girl hasn't even started earning. They will be living in tight finances. The best thing will be for both of them to work on getting a sustainable income.

Lol. He can’t go for entry level jobs na. Experience is very important and his experience is in security administration. I don’t know what prospects he has with that.

It is a good idea that they want to improve their income, but the fact that it came out of the blues is suspicious. Maybe them done realize say their daughter still get time to hook a Ned.