₦airaland Forum

Dat man is Pst T.B Joshua and d cup is filling itself by the command given to it by the powerful pastor.

I dnt buy d idea of those tellin u not to go to d mother. U went to dem wen u wanted d girl. U still need to go dia and explain tins to dem and let u and dem confirm dat d girl has come bak to dem in case of 2moro dey'll accuse u and even said u neva cared 2 come. It may be hard 4 u explain ur reason den.

Majority of househelps 2day r evil. Imagine, a househelp forced a stone into d anus of a toddler under her care. Her reason is dat d baby poo a lot. Anoda one fed a baby with some quantities of kerosene alleging dat her aunty used to beat her. Well 4 us we r lucky wt d one living wt us. Though we dnt take ha as a house help. She's lik a daughter. Her parents (4rm Nasarawa State) gave her to my wife(Igbo lady) as a gift after ha Youth service dia. As at den we wia not yet married. Dey love my wife and asked her to make d girl be like herself. D girl was 5yrs den(2010).
D girl takes care of our kids even more dan we d parents.

One goal against Real Madrid

I Saw this on a post: trust me, you'll like it: "MARRIAGE SOFTWARE This is what a guy wrote to a Systems Analyst - (Marriage Software Div); Dear Systems Analyst, I am desperate for some help! I recently upgraded my program from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that the new program began unexpected Child Processing and also took up a lot of space and valuable resources. This wasn't mentioned in the product brochure. In addition Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during systems initialization and then it monitors all other system activities. Applications such as "Boys' Night out 2.5" and "Golf 5.3" no longer run, and crashes the system whenever selected. Attempting to operate selected "Soccer 6.3" always fails and "Shopping 7.1" runs instead. I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background whilst attempting to run any of my favorite applications. Be it online or offline. I am thinking of going back to "Girlfriend 7.0", but uninstall doesn't work on this program. Can you please help? .... The Systems Analyst replied: Dear Customer, This is a very common problem resulting from a basic misunderstandin g of the functions of the Wife 1.0 program. Many customers upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 thinking that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITY AND ENTERTAINMENT PROGRAM. Actually, Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM designed by its Creator to run everything on your current platform. You are unlikely to be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0, as Wife 1.0 was not designed to do this and it is impossible to uninstall, delete or purge the program files from the System once it is installed. Some people have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but have ended up with even more problems. (See manual under Alimony/Child Support and Solicitors' Fees). Having Wife 1.0 installed, I recommend you keep it Installed and deal with the difficulties as best as you can. When any faults or problems occur, whatever you think has caused them, you must run the......... C:\ APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME.EXE Program and avoid attempting to use the *Esc-Key for it will freeze the entire system. It may be necessary to run C:\ APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME.EXE a number of times, and eventually hope that the operating system will return to normal. Wife 1.0, although a very high maintenance programme, can be very rewarding. To get the most out of it, consider buying additional Software such as "Flowers 2.0" and "Chocolates 5.0" or "HUGS\ KISSES 600.0" or "TENDERNESS\ UNDERSTANDING 1000.0" or even Eating Out Without the Kids 7.2.1" (if Child processing has already started). DO NOT under any circumstances install "Secretary 2.1" (Short Skirt Version) or "One Nightstand 3.2" (Any Mood Version), as this is not a supported Application for Wife 1.0 and the system will almost certainly CRASH. BEST WISHES! Yours," Systems Analyst
cc. Lalasticlala

I could remember with nostalgia how we back those good years tend to respect and fear our school teachers than our parents. Those days when our parents will threaten to report us to our school teachers over our disobedience.

Those are the days when role of teachers in our societies are seen as a noble one. When the society looks upon the schools and churches/mosques to continue the good foundational trainings parents have given to their children.

Those good days when all students/pupils are expected to appear on the assembly /ground hall every morning, hymns (Ancient & Modern Hymn Book), songs sang, moral instructions taken, offenders and disobedient students punished before all to serve as deterrent then students/pupils march to their classrooms in uniform order. Those days are gone.

Why am I writing this? I went to drop off my kid to their school yesterday morning. On getting into the school premises, I saw this man fuming wt anger cos his daughter of about 10yrs told him that one of the Teachers (Aunty) flogged her. I checked the girl, there was no injury, no physical mark to show that she was flogged beyond what is expected from a character molder (teacher).

When the teacher that flogged the girl showed up, come and see how the man was insulting her before everyone including the girl dat was flogged. Telling the girl that it was the money that he pays that her salary was paid from and all blab la bla.

At a point, I feel I should talk to the man. I called and told him that by his action that he is discouraging the teacher and other teachers to help mold his daughter’s characters. Secondly, that his action will make his daughter have less respect for her teachers which will in turn affect her learning negatively. But I saw that the man has a problem understanding simple logic of life.

My question is;Will it be better for us to have a whip-free schools in the country? In as much as I dnt beliv that pupils/students should be punished for every single mistake, I dnt solicit ignoring all their unwanted characters especially now parents don’t have time for their children and left the teachers to do the work for them. We are Africans. We beliv that a parent does not have their children alone. We belive in collective training of a child and daz why I can flog my neighbour’s child dat misbehaved and the parents will come back to thank me for that. What is happening to that tradition.

SSpeter:
yeah never say your boss is wrong....Then why does he disturbs us with critic sessions...no be him tell me say I free to criticise? criticism was one of my selling points when he hire me ooo

Pee my brother, u still seem not to understand dis. Ur boss allowed u guys for criticism not to tell him that he is wrong. The rule is never tell ur boss dat he is wrong. Make suggestion and never make him feel u tink u kw it more than him.

Pls correct this b4 it haunts u again in ur next job. I wont like this to happen. Dont be arrogant cos of wot u think u kw. I've spotted this in u. Secondly, if u think u r tired of that company, put up ur resignation and leave honourably. Dnt do something that will dent ur profile(dismissal/termination may not be good in ur profile). U may not knw who next that may intend hiring u. U kw all these bosses r connected in one way or the other. They may say good or bad thing about their ex-staff to intended employer.

So be wise bro.

SSpeter:
I felt breaking my boss head after he made some derogatory comments that got me angry and belittled.....

Yesterday a colleague and I went to take measurements of a bank for renovation works in one of the tertiary institution in ogun state. My colleague been the senior was given the full details and equipment needed. When we got to ogun state, he gave me the equipment (tape and camera) and asked me if I could do it that he has a babe in the school. I said yes and he gave me extra 3k I guess that was to shut me up.

After taking the measurement of the floor area in the banking hall and other adjoining spaces, I took pictures of the tiles and ceilings just to show my boss that they were in a very poor state. When I got back home I used my computer to scale the measurements and then redesigned the banking hall.

The main aim of the renovation was to increase the number of cubicles in the banking hall from 3 to 7. Today when I got to the office, I gave my boss the report and showed the the proposed design I made, he said "Great". During critic session I was surprised that the initial drawing was brought out and he was redoing the design. Well I no talk, I watched until he was done instructing the architect. Then I compared his proposed design with mine and I quickly pointed out to him that he has used up much space for circulation moreover our cubicle spatial analysis is till the same.

He called me Peter!!! ....what year were you born I told him, he said that was the year I started this company. If you have things in your head keep it. When you establish your firm, use it. Na so everybody dey look me like say I shit for body. See me wey for just keep quite....If it were to be somewhere else, Na orijin bottle I for arrange untop him head...............that is why I keep praying for a multinational firm....abeg make I quickly go check my shell application status....

Peter, bosses beliv dey kw it all. Never tell ur boss dat he is wrong or his opinion is wrong. U rather say to him, sir wot if we do it like dis or like dat, will it be good or will it give us d desired result?

A colleague of mine made dat same mistake of urs. Probably trying to impress our MD with his wealth of knowledge. Guess wot d MD told him. "U've dis kind of beautiful ideas and u r still here working 4 someone instead of using it to develope ur own company, u must be a mad man"

"I was like.....", "he was like....", "they were like..." are NOT acceptable grammar for any use in quoting people, paraphrasing, imagining/extrapolating, or otherwise. It's slang, though it's become common, but it does not have any place in English when it is spoken well, so by all means, replace it everywhere.

In cases where you are quoting yourself or someone else in the past, but you are either paraphrasing, or doing an impression of the person, or voicing what they were probably thinking and using "I said...", "they said... " wouldn't really make sense what will be the better replacement for the phrase? I see the frequent use of these phrases as the case of ones inability to build enough English words to express oneself. It is an escape route for the those that are grammatically poor.

Using the above phrases frequently when paraphrasing or imitating, to me it may be a bit dull. So if you'd like to spice it up, you can try something like:

As soon as I opend the bottle "he made a face as if he smelled a rat, and then he said/yelled/asked me, 'James, where's the cork for this bottle?'"


"They came to the door and made their best sniveling faces, and when I opened the door they whined, all together, 'Trick or treat!'"

"I've watched her a million times with that boyfriend of hers. You can almost hear her thinking, 'Next guy I date is gonna be shorter than six-four.'"

It's not the words right before the quotation or paraphrase—said, yelled, asked, whined—that make a sentence spicy. It's the description of what was going on as things were said. The gestures. The scents. The face-making. The mood. So replace "was like" with anything grammatically correct and suited to what happened. (Really. Please. With anything at all.) Then make the description rock with the colorful details.

Greenbuoy:
If these work for Nigerian mosquitos, op should come have my father's car keys!

If this does not work for mosquitoes that bite u, just kw it that the mosquitoes must be witches and wizards haunting u from your village. U need native doctor's protection not the above solutions.

deolu2000:
BVM? I thought it is called BVN.

Yes, it used to be BVN till dat guy changed it.
He also changed MTN to NTM....season of CHANGE.

Ouch….. the awful pesky sting of a mosquito is not something anyone enjoys. Mosquitoes are blood sucking insects that know how to spoil a good party. Sure, you can spray yourself with toxic bug repellent and they may stay away for a while, but who wants the worry of all of those dangerous chemicals?

The good news is that there are natural, safe and effective ways to keep mosquitoes at bay so that you can enjoy your outdoor living space all summer long. Try any one of these five natural solutions or combine them for best protection.

Make Your own Bug-be-Gone Spray
• Add distilled water to an empty (and clean) spray bottle to the halfway mark.
• Fill the spray bottle until it is almost full with witch hazel.
• Add 60 drops of essential oils and shake well. Use rosemary, clove, or eucalyptus.

Make Your Garden Mosquito-Proof
• Plant citronella, rosemary, catnip, mint, marigolds, basil, lemongrass and garlic. Mosquitoes hate the smell of these plants, and they will stay away.
• Dump out any sitting water and avoid leaving things out that would collect water. Keep animal dishes and birdbaths clean and fresh.
• Mosquitoes love damp dark places, keep those places to a minimum by keeping up with your garden. Weed, trim bushes, and keep the lawn mowed. Not only will it look nice, but you reduce your mosquito population substantially.
• Put up plenty of bird houses, especially a purple martin house. Birds eat hundreds of mosquitoes each day and will also be a pleasant addition to your landscape.

Wear Proper Clothing
Wear lightweight, light-colored clothing that fits loosely. Make sure places like your arms, legs and neck are covered to avoid bites on these areas.

Use Fans
If you are planning on spending a lot of time outdoors, setting up a fan is a useful way to push mosquitoes away. Mosquitoes are attracted to the moving blades, but then get sucked up by the air and killed by the blades. Position fans where you spend the most time such as on covered porches, gazebos, etc.

Use Citronella Candles
Citronella or any other strong smelling herbal candles are highly offensive to mosquitoes. The sight of the flame and scent from the candles is enough to send even the largest and most determined mosquitoes packing.

Natural Ways to Ease the Pain of Mosquito bites

If you do happen to get bit, try any of these methods to ease the pain and reduce swelling.
• Ice – Apply an ice pack to the area to help reduce swelling and pain.

• Tea Tree Oil – Apply tea tree oil directly to the bite.

• Apple Cider Vinegar – Spray or wipe apple cider vinegar on to the area to ease itch and pain.

• Raw Honey - Dab a glob of honey on the bite and rub it into your skin.

• Tea bag – Make a pot of tea then place the tea bag on your bite. This will reduce redness and itching.

• Baking soda – Make a paste with baking soda and water. Rub the paste on your bite to draw out the itch.

• Witch hazel – Rub witch hazel directly onto your bites.

• Mint – Rub crushed mint leaves onto your skin to reduce itching and further protect you from mosquitoes.

• Banana – Place a banana slice on your bite to ease the pain.

• Aloe Vera – Rub aloe vera gel onto the bite to reduce redness and swelling

Reediano:
Am sure most of you might have been in that kind of situation where you have little or no airtime on your line but you are so stranded that you can't buy a recharge card and you also have no internet access to perform an online topup. This can be really frustrating.

This method saves you the energy and time wasted when searching for where to purchase airtime or queuing at an ATM just to recharge your line. But unfortunately not all banks currently supports this for now.

Below are the list of supported banks and their respective ussd code.


==> Zenith Bank: Zenith bank users can top up their line by dialing *966*amount# or *302*amount# for Mtn users.
Example: To recharge a sum of N500, simply dial *966*500# and your line will be credited with N500 airtime.

Note: *You can only perform any of this transaction on the no you registered with your bank.
*It is completely free and there is no hidden charges.
*If your bank is not listed above, then maybe your bank does not support this feature yet.
*If you think I omitted any one, just drop it in the comment box below.

http://www.yomitech.com/2015/11/how-to-buy-airtime-directly-from-your.html

@ OP, pls this service is not free. It comes wt a commission which will make u not to try dis service again unless in a situation where an alternative is not available. Get ur bank account balance b4 purchasing airtime and compare it wt the one after the purchase. Telling u from experience. I have tried it 3 times wt my Zenith Account and confirmed dis.

Goahead:
You're really insightful... Don't use it for evil.

Your phone no get Sale&Share Transfer Code. How can one transfer airtime 4rm ur phone to ones line wtout ur code or do u share ur code to everyone?

We are considering banning the use of make-ups by our ladies. This agitation has become serious considering the rate our ladies are becoming too fake. It has become so difficult to know who is real and fake among them.

One Mr. Dontmentionmyname has lamented at this "fakeness" in our ladies. Narrating his experience, he said that the most annoying thing is this fake nyash that is en vogue. He said that he took a lady home due to her “nyashious tendency” only to see that the nyash has disappeared soon after the lady went to take her shower. He was so angry about that.

Dear Nairalanders, we are here to seek for you opinions on this issue before we finally slam this ban.

Talking dirty doesn’t come naturally for most women which explains why many dating experts like myself receive countless correspondence and questions on the topic. Things like:

Why do men love dirty talk so much?

My man wants me to talk dirty to him. What should I do?

Help! I want to talk dirty to my boyfriend, but I don’t know what to say or how to say it!

If you are one of those women who are keen on pleasing your man 100% but you are having some problems in the “dirty talk department”, you are in the right place.

Many men want to talk dirty with their girlfriends and spouses. It may be in bed, at work, over text, while hanging out etc. He may initiate dirt talk in person, via his phone or any other gadget. If you find yourself mum i.e. you don’t know how to act, respond etc. don’t worry. You aren’t alone.

Dirty talk doesn’t have to be embarrassing or awkward as many women claim. If you understand the reasons behind it and why men love it so much, you won’t have any problems responding favorably to it.

It is important to note there are many good programs online today that have tried to address the dirty talk subject. Perhaps the best is Language of Desire by Felicity Keith. This article won’t discuss the mechanics of dirty talk in depth like Felicity’s program does, but rather why men love it so much and how you should respond when your man wants you to talk dirty to him.

Let’s start by discussing some of the main reasons why men love dirty talk.

1. Men have one erogenous zone only

Contrary to popular belief, men have only one erogenous zone which matters. It’s not his manhood or his stomach. It’s his brain. Period!

Although many people may disagree with this, it’s the truth. A man’s mind/imagination matters more than any other body part.

Some research studies have proven this fact by suggesting and proving that women enjoy sex more than men on a purely physical level. Although this is contrary to popular belief, some scientific studies have proven this fact.

If that’s truly the case, you may now be asking yourself why most men want to have sex multiple times if they don’t get as much thrill from it? Well, there are a few reasons behind this.

One, testosterone doesn’t just make men grow chest hair. It has also been proven to make men desperate to mate with many women. Also, the psychological high of pleasuring women is extremely intoxicating to men.

One of the best ways for a man to pleasure a woman is to have sex with her. Although the act itself brings some pleasure, being praised makes men extremely aroused. This is precisely why men love dirty talk.

There is no better way to let your man know that he is pleasing you other than to tell him yourself by talking dirty during sex.

2. It helps to gauge if you are also interested

Let’s face it. In many instances, women are hard to turn on during sex. For this reason, many men might have some doubts on whether their women are interested in them or not.

Dirty talk gives men the go ahead to engage you fully. Considering men think about sex more than women, dirty talk with you helps to make his thoughts two-sided. It will help him focus all his attention on you which is exactly what he wants if he loves you.

So how should you respond if your man wants you to talk dirty to him?

Having understood why men love dirty talk, let’s focus our attention to how you should respond because most women are clueless on this matter. If you don’t want to mess things up, here’s what you should do:

1. Don’t respond to your man like he’s a woman

Most women mess up dirty talk by responding to it as if they are dealing with a woman. Instead of dismissing it or being disgusted or embarrassed by it, go with the flow and turn up the heat gradually. This works wonders for most men.

2. Understand the ultimate male fantasy

You should also focus on understanding what every guy dreams about. Most men want to turn on women without having to do anything.

It seems a little silly and unrealistic, but most men want to be so sexy, dominant, and powerful that they turn on women without having to do much. That’s right, he wants to feel like he’s such an unbelievably dominant MAN, that the mere sight of him sends you into an earth-shattering orgasm.

If you understand this, you won’t have a problem responding to him in a way that makes him feel sexy, masculine, and powerful. You can talk about how he turns you on. You can also talk about his masculine physique, behavior etc (and, yes, that includes the size of his “package”).

When it comes right down to it, a lot of talking dirty to your man is good-ole fashioned ego stroking. Few things make a man feel more empowered than having a beautiful women (you) tell him what a stud he is, especially in the bedroom.

After reading the above information, you shouldn’t have a problem understanding men’s obsession with dirty talk and how to respond to it perfectly.

Have fun

He is 40 yrs not 35. May his soul rest in peace. Dnt kw why celebrities do funny things like dis.

Everybody loves a great conversation. It is one of life’s simple pleasures. Sharing ideas and perspectives is a great way feel alive and connected. Looking back at the high points in your life, I hope there are some Intelligent Conversations in there.
So establishing some groundrules for an Intelligent Conversation can help you avoid getting sidetracked and wasting time. A groundrule is an agreement between everyone that is the foundation for what you are about to do. House rules is another common phrase used to describe groundrules.

Especially with all the political and financial news lately, there are many important things that are hard to talk about constructively.
Here is how to prepare for an Intelligent Conversation.

(1) Accept the other person WILL disagree with you.

This stops a lot of people right away. An Intelligent Conversation is not “cram your ideas down the other person’s throat”. The whole point of an Intelligent Conversation is to try and see the other person’s perspective. Just because someone disagrees with you doesn’t automatically make you wrong or stupid. Or them wrong or stupid!

It is best not to care if the other person comes around to your way of thinking or not. Your objective is not to prove the other person wrong, but to LEARN if your perspective is the most correct and useful.
If you want to have a conversation with someone that agrees with you, you can do that by yourself.

(2) No name calling or personal attacks. Ever!

This is an absolute requirement. Rather than saying “You’re a dumbass,” try “I disagree with that view, and here are my reasons why.”
Focus on ideas and concepts, not on the person sharing those ideas and concepts.

Telling someone why you think their idea is incorrect is vastly different than telling someone they’re stupid for thinking that way.
The first way will keep them open to what you’re saying, the second will make them defensive and they will stop listening.

(3) Always be polite.

There are many things included in this groundrule:
Listen first (Don’t interrupt.)
Be respectful and courteous (Don’t be condescending, rude or dismissive.)
Give the other people a chance to be heard (Don’t be a ‘ball hog’ and do all the talking.)
A bad example is the way discussions are held on cable news or talk shows. They are trying to get people to watch and sell advertising much more than they are trying to help you become better informed.

A good example? A well respected journalist is perhaps is the way it supposed to be done. How does Barbara Walter have a conversation vs Howard Stern? (I’m using these as an example of their style, not their substance.)

(4) Try and understand from their point of view.

Try listening to just the words the other person is using. Repeat back to the person what they just said, and see if you got it right before sharing your opinion. Ask them politely to explain to you again if you did not correctly understand what they are communicating.
Where many people get caught up is they hear what they want to hear. They filter what they hear through their own beliefs. Try to put yourself in the other person’s shoes.

For example, I like baseball more than football. Some people think that means I hate football. That’s not what I said — I like football too — but there is an assumption on the meaning.
“You shall listen to all sides and filter them for yourself.” — Walt Whitman

(5) Be willing to check your facts, and admit when you need more information or need to do more research.

“I don’t know” or “I don’t know enough” is not a bad thing.
Nobody knows everything, and there will be times people know things that you don’t. Stubbornly sticking to incorrect facts and information defeats the purpose of having an Intelligent Conversation.
Having an open mind has got to be one of the hardest things to do. But it can be one of the most rewarding.
This is really hard to do with topics like politics and religion. There may even be topics that have to be off limits, and cannot be discussed.

(6) Separate the emotional from the factual.

There are times you’ll feel a certain way about something just because. That’s OK. Everyone has things they believe that are not rooted in any fact.
There are things you associate very powerful positive or negative feelings with that hugely influence how you feel. Even if the facts contradict how you feel.
Accept your feelings, and accept other people’s feelings. This where you have to exercise self control, as feelings are not likely to change.

(7) Be humble in victory and gracious in defeat.

Nobody likes a gloating winner and nobody likes a bitter loser.
If you do persuade others to see things your way, be kind and tread lightly, or you may change their mind back. So no bragging or boasting about how smart you are or how right you are.

If you have changed your mind and now agree with someone else’s point of view, be grateful to have learned something new. It is not a contest to be won or lost.

Thank you for reading my thoughts on having an Intelligent Conversation.
What do you think? Are there any more rules that should be added to this list? Or any removed?

There are lots of healthy bathroom habits you probably follow every day, like washing your hands and flossing your teeth, but there are some that many people develop that may actually be harming their health. Are you guilty of any of these bad bathroom habits?

Letting mold build up on your shower curtain. Because mold and mildew thrive on dark, wet surfaces, they tend to grow quickly on shower curtains. Breathing them in can trigger allergy and asthma symptoms. You can prevent this by running a fan while you’re in the shower or opening a window, which allows the air to circulate.

Mold, mildew and even soap scum that is left unattended can potentially cause a serious infection, so it’s important to clean your shower curtain and liner on a regular basis. If it can’t be removed, it’s time to replace it.

Leaving your toothbrush out near the sink. [/b]Your toothbrush really should be stored in a medicine cabinet or drawer. Each time the toilet is flushed it will get sprayed with bacteria that can get into your mouth when you use it. Dry the bristles off after every use and put it away, eliminating this really gross habit.

[b]Flushing with the lid up. Every time you flush, those germs and other particles become airborne, as mentioned above. Lowering the lid before flushing can help limit the amount that gets into the air. Keep in mind, this doesn’t mean you can leave out your toothbrush, as there are still some microorganisms that will be floating around.

Not changing towels frequently enough. Your hand towel harbors bacteria, and when used around the eyes or mouth it can transfer from the towel to you and make you ill. It should be changed at least once a week. Your bath towels should be hung dry after each use and changed out after three uses.

[b]Using Q-tips inside your ears. [/b]The label on a box of Q-tips clearly reads that you shouldn’t insert the swab into your ear canal as it can cause injury, but many people ignore this warning.

This could potentially rupture the ear membrane, and is likely to just push wax deeper into the ear canal, which means it will have to be professionally removed. It isn’t necessary to use a cotton swab at all, as earwax naturally moves toward the opening of the ear canal and is washed off when you shower.

Washing your hands has been proven as the most effective way to prevent contracting and spreading disease. Don’t use antibacterial soap, which contains potentially harmful compounds and may be ineffective. Instead, use warm water and soap to reduce bacteria on your skin. This lessens your chance of catching the common cold, flu, strep infections and other illnesses.
Transforming bad bathroom habits into good ones takes just a little effort to potentially prevent lots of misery.

colp2015:
Well, it's good you are still on Nairaland.

Together, we can revive the good old days

Yes, my broda am ready to put in my quota, but d admin panel has great job to do hia. Sometimes i wonder if dey r also enjoying d stupidity threading hia.

I recall wt sweet nostalgia of those early years wen my fellow Nairalanders used to post great topics while comments and responses dat follow d topics r sound, intelligent, devoid of insults and tribalistic word war.

Those days, u learn lots of good things from each of d forum u visit. Ppl respect ppl's opinion. Ppl discuss like one big happy family.

I feel so sad seeing how Nairaland and her subscribers r devaluing dis forum. No matter how sensible a topic is, ppl commenting will definitely make a mess of d topic thereby distracting a good and logical flow of d post. It's very painful. Every post loses its value as soon as it comes up, cos some ppl will see it as an avenue to unleash dia insultive and tribalistic capability.

In those days, u only see befitting topics making d front page. Wot do we hv 2day, most of d times, u see junks adoring d front page. Administrative lapses.

I'll like a situation wia Nairaland re-assumes her former glory. Mr. Suen, ur attention is highly needed hia b4 u start losing responsible ppl 4rm dis great page of urs.

gemale:
I hereby prophesy dt by ds the next month, wen odas r bringing forth their tithes, ur colleague wld b absent due 2 D sack leta he wld soon recv.

I pray dey dnt sack him. He shld just be warned

Vikkie14:
He did not relate the part two of the prophesy that he is going to lose his job.

My dear, he fail to realize that. The way he puts up his defense, he so much believe that he is convincing the management and wrote as if all the management team belong to that his ministry

This happened in the company I worked. This is one of the noted companies in Nigeria which has its branches in some of the West Coast countries.

The last time the staff salaries were paid, which is usually done through Remitta. Some of the staff got double alert for the same month salary probably due to network error or mistake from the bank or from the remitta operator. Dey fail to report to Accounts Department that they received double salary for the month and went ahead to withdrew the double salary.

The funny part of it was when the management noticed this error and the names of those that received the double alert. They were given memo based on that and stating that they were expected to exhibit some level of honesty and inform the management of this error rather they went ahead to withdraw the money.

On their responses, many asked for pardon, some claimed they did not even see any alert as their phones were in bad state. The one that caught my attention was that from a staff that claimed that he is a strong believer in prophesy. He said that since he has been attending this particular Ministry that the Pastor has given many prophesies that have come to fulfillment. He claimed that his pastor once told them that they will receive financial favour that will baffle them and he claimed the prophesy. That was why when he saw the double alert and after confirming that the money really entered twice into his account, he believed that it was his pastor's prophesy that has come to fulfillment. He still has the courage to warn that no one should take away what God has given to him.

Well, the HR Dept is still going through the issue, but I see this particular guy getting more punished than fellow culprits.

1. Why do ppl throw away food that has dead house fly in it but drink palm wine with even larger and more numbers of both dead and live house flies?

2. When an unknown person spit by our side and u feel irritated especially when wind blows a little of it to our body, but if by chance we happen to fall for that the same person, we start exchanging saliva in the name of kiss instantly.

3. Why most girls will be wearing extraordinarily body revealing dresses but wen in a bus and it stops for ppl to ease off, the same girls will run far into bushes to urinate just to hide their public parts…sorry private parts from been seen.

4. Why most ladies will reject many men that come their ways for marriage only to stop disturbing God and Babalawo when same men stop coming.

5. Why do ppl not make haste when the sky is cloudy only to start running when the rain has started beating them?

6. Why in higher institutions, make up (exams) are for students that fall short of academic standard, while in women work, make up (cosmetics) are mostly or heavily used by those babes that think that dey are of higher standard than others?

7. Why most ppl have beautiful write-up and great advise on their facebook walls, but their lives lack in totality what they write.

perly2:
how

Do u need a binocular?

I want to congratulate the Batch C Corps members who just past out yesterday. I really thank God for their successful passing out. I also want to console the friends and families of those that lost their sons/daughters during this period. May God grant them fortitude to bear the lost.

Now that you have completed your service and now going to face the real world. You may call it labour market or favour market, it does not change the fact that you are going to face a world of competition. There are things you have to do (if you have not already started doing them) to get yourself braced up for the challenges ahead.

Let us take a look at some of the things you need to do, the list is not conclusive. You may add to this to make yourself stand out among others.

1. DREAM OF THAT JOB: There are different kinds of job to get oneself engaged onto. There are some that you will not take up when offered to you. Before now, you should have known the kind of job you will like to do and start living like you are already doing the job. If you wish to work in a bank, start living like a banker, have some bankers friends and this will bring you closer to your dream job and build the required interest in you.

2. CARRY OUT RESEARCH: [/b]It baffles me how many people submit CV and apply for a job they know little or nothing about. Research on the company or organization you wish to work with. This will give you more insight on what they do and how they do them. If you can follow them on Twitter, that will be a good idea. A job you know nothing about may not interest you and you may end up not doing well in it.


[b]3. ACQUIRE PROFESSIONAL CERTIFICATES: Congratulations, you have your first degree certificate. I tell you, this is just the beginning. There are many people out there seeking for that same job you applied for with more certificates to their credit. This places them a bit ahead of you. Do yourself a bit good by getting more professional certificates added to your first degree cert.

4. ACQUIRE AT LEAST A SKILL: Yes, you need to acquire a skill. Find a good skill acquisition centre and get enrolled in one of their programmes. That precious time you are using in playing mobile games, computer games, and irrelevant chats and pinging can be directed to skill acquisition which will go a long way helping you while waiting for that your dream job. Secondly, acquire enough computer skills especially as regards to Office packages. Your ability to use your computer to chat or browse does not qualify you as a computer literate. Acquire those computer skills that will help you do your office works more efficiently. One of those Office packages is Microsoft Excel. Most of you have your laptops, but it is only used for playing music and watching movies. This is the time to turn that electronic box into life improving gadget.


5. CHANGE YOUR WARDROBE: [/b]This is the right time to start updating your wardrobe. It’s time to drop all those your dirty jean, combat pants, rugged boots and all those school boy/girls attires and start dressing more corporately and matured. Make better use of the savings from your alawee. Buy nice suits, shirts, ties and shoes. It may not be the very costly ones, but let them look nice. You also need a good brief case. Stop carrying your CV in that big brown envelope. A CEO may sight you from his office window and tell the security man or his secretary not to let you in cos he has seen your envelope and assume you are a job seeker.

[b]6. WORK ON YOUR WEB IMAGE: It is very important that you take enough time to work on your web image. What am I saying? Give me your Facebook account or Twitter handle and I will tell you the kind of person you are. If your Facebook wall has been filled with posts and comments that do not really represent who you are, I think it is right time you start clearing the mess or creating a completely new account. You may not know this, most employers visit the facebook accounts/Twitter handles of job seekers to know the kind of life they live before offering that job. Secondly, that your email address need to look more official. Time to drop that ruggedman@yahoo.com, sexydiva@gmail.com, cynthialuv@whatever.com. Your email should have your name and surname. Email address like ikechukwuokoro@yahoo.com or adewaleadekunle@gmail.com look more official than the previous ones.

7. GET A MENTOR: You need a mentor who will have enough time to guide and guard you and who will be able to entrust on you responsibilities even when it is not all about payment. You can’t tell me that the Senate President is your mentor when you are not in talking level with him, when you don’t even know where he lives etc. He cannot be your mentor when he cannot talk about you. He may be your role model but not your mentor. Let your mentor be who you can have access to and who can truly show you how to succeed in life.
I strongly believe that if you start off this way, you will not fail to compete well with other highly qualified people. Wishing you all the best. Once again, CONGRATULATIONS.

Wizzz:
Between Wizkid and Chris Brown, ENIOLA BADMUS rocked it better





But OP your battery na wa oh

The OP is a patriotic Nairalander. Upon the level of his battery life, he still force it to make the post. Guy u try. Uncle Seun an award for patriotic members ooo

falcon01:
since oyinbo dey create word make i create my own weedolokopatikoclitorisadomaniavlyonomotashankrinkunkrankunmutumutalakadiosis meaning:: high on weed

I can see u have been taking too much of Ajegunle weed. The inspiration is obvious. Carry on bro

adebayor1490:
ahn ahn, you're too harsh on that gurl naw... 3 comment, big bashing... reason am naw

Best way to handle the Over Sabi (OS) ppl.

So your child has grown older, and you're ready to give them a head start in getting ready with math. Well, that's great! This article will give you some tips and ideas on how to best instruct your child while not making them fall asleep.
Many of us were not able to master the mathematics skills and tricks early in life because we were made to believe that the subject is so hard that it will take special talent to understand it. This is false. You can help your child overcome this false impression by following this tips and other helpful tips u can.

Four Parts:

Offering Encouragement

Teaching Concepts

Making Math Real

Keeping It Up


Part 1 of 4: Offering Encouragement
1. Encourage your child. What do you think would make for a more enriching class-time experience, an excited and ambitious one or a defiant, uninspired one.

2. Keep teaching the child at a consistent pace. Sit down with them daily or at least biweekly to fuse the concepts into their minds. Never forget to keep it fun!

3. Begin teaching your child with an interactive activity. There's so much of options. you can use flashcards or a simple sheet of problems. Give them a handful of small objects and let them use those to count out the answers to the problems. Make sure you also have them learn to use their fingers in case no objects are available.

Part 2 of 4: Teaching Concepts
1. Teach concepts, not just memorization. While memorization can certainly be helpful, it's even more helpful to have the child learn exactly how mathematical functions work. This way, they can also begin to apply their knowledge in other ways. That will help them when they begin to move on to more complicated math.

• Make multiple activities that show how the concept works.

2. Always make sure that your child completely understands a concept before moving on. If you skimp out on anything, it will be confusing for them and they will not be able to work as well as they should be able to when you apply it in other ways

Part 3 of 4: Making Math Real
1. Enhance the learning experience by playing games with the things around you. For example, ask them to say how many more pictures on the wall there is in the living room than the dining room. Have them count them both, then subtract.

2. Continue to incorporate the concepts you've taught into fun things in real life. For example, measuring fractions when baking cookies, asking how many cats are at the pet store or how many showings of their new favorite movie are playing that day.

• Bring up problems when you're out with your child. In the grocery store, for example, ask them how much money out of $10 you'd have left if you bought green beans for $1. This will also help make the connections in their mind to help them to become better at math.

3. Play board games. Board games with two dice rolled instead of one can be a good application for learning basic addition. When they get older, games that use play money, like Monopoly, can help them learn more about adding and subtracting money.

Part 4 of 4: Keeping It Up
1. Reward Your Child. At the end of your time sitting down to work with them, reward them somehow. Whether you give them a small piece of candy or you just hug them and express how smart they are, it will give them confidence and help them strive to do better.

2. Don't Quit! Teaching your child math isn't something that happens overnight. Skills need to stack up in their minds like building blocks, and while schools are a primary educator in your child's life, you are one of the most important!

Tips
• Don't get upset over wrong answers! Thinking about the problems in a logical way is more important than getting correct answers.
• Don't go too slow, either. Staying too long on one topic will make a child bored of it quickly.
• Remember KISS - Keep It Simple, Sweetie! Small children aren't going to be able to handle too much complexity with math at this point. Be patient and never go faster than your child can take.
• Some good maths games are; Maths Puzzle, 2042, King of Math, Numtris and more! There are thousands of educational games out there for you and your child to enjoy!

Things You'll Need
• Small objects to count with (optional if you have a better alternative)
• Board games (optional)