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 Family › For Men Only: The Silent Pains Of A Husband by QuinModah(op): 9:39pm On Apr 17, 2022 |
FOR MEN ONLY: THE SILENT PAINS OF A HUSBAND Everybody is hung up on domestic abuse by men against women. Nobody spares a moment to find solutions to the equally devastating verbal abuse men suffer in the hands of their wives. It is worse because men can't discuss what their wives do to them for fear of scorn and derision. They suffer in silence. Timebomb. Unfortunately, the Nigerian society has little or no support systems for this kind of situation. Little or no counselling services. It's been mostly left to the church to deal with. What happens when the man doesn't go to church? What happens when the woman doesn't believe in spiritual intervention? These women are raising daughters. Their daughters are hearing and seeing how they speak to and treat their husband. What kind of wives will they grow up to become? Those that treat their husbands as kings or those that believe husbands are nothing but verbal punching bags? We've all agreed and rightfully so that a man has no business hitting his wife. So how then do you stop a wife raining verbal missiles at you? Leave the house? Okay. But you'll return and it will continue. What next? Leave again? For how long? Recently, I visited a senior friend, an important man in the society and while we were downstairs gisting, the voice of his wife could be heard upstairs. She was spewing unimaginable bile against the man. She called him all sorts of unprintable names. Impotent, wretched fool, miserable man that was nothing when she married him, etc. This is a well respected man. A father of 4 children. She tore at his very core and mocked everything society respected him for. She said he'd soon crash and she'll be there to laugh at him. I was so uncomfortable as I beheld the man. He was shrunken before me. He was deflated. He tried to gamefully continue the gist to distract me but it was not working. The woman's vitriol was a ceaseless torrent. Uncomfortable silence ensued. I excused myself and left his house. I was really sad. You want to know the truth? This is what most men go through in their houses. They labour and toil and build respect but when they return home, the one who ought to speak to the king in them tears them to shreds and tries to deflate their self-esteem. When they are outside, they try to act cheerful and happy but back home, they are shrivelled because the person they live with makes it a point of duty to verbally assault them. A sad story comes to mind. There was recently a Nigerian Ambassador who was recalled because his wife released a story to the press that he beat her. She also released pictures showing fresh injuries on her body ostensibly inflicted by the man. In a dramatic twist, their children came out to debunk the stories and said their mother faked the injuries to embarrass their dad. Grown up children. A particular sentence by the 1st son saddened me. He said it was as if their mum woke up every morning with one mission in life: how to make their dad miserable. They said they were witnesses to how their mum constantly harassed and abused their dad and wanted the whole world to know that their dad was not who their mum was painting him to be. Yes, opinion shifted on the scandal but the damage had been done. The Ambassador was recalled and nobody heard from him again. A family is currently at odds with the widow of their son and brother. The wife was constantly verbally assaulting him. Nobody wanted to visit them because each time they were around, it was always quarrel and the wife would call him unprintable names. Even in their presence. When they try to interfere, she will give them their own. The man died recently of heart-attack caused by high blood pressure. He was in his late 40s. The family insists his wife sent him to his early grave with her verbal torments. Our bars are filled with men who are afraid to go home to their wives for fear of what verbal torment they will go through. Men are finding every excuse to travel because they'll rather be anywhere than in their own homes. Everybody is focusing on men as culprits in domestic abuse. Who is talking to the women? - Author Anonymous 15 Likes 5 Shares |
| Family › For Men Only: The Silent Pains Of A Husband by QuinModah(op): 9:33pm On Apr 17, 2022 |
FOR MEN ONLY: THE SILENT PAINS OF A HUSBAND Everybody is hung up on domestic abuse by men against women. Nobody spares a moment to find solutions to the equally devastating verbal abuse men suffer in the hands of their wives. It is worse because men can't discuss what their wives do to them for fear of scorn and derision. They suffer in silence. Timebomb. Unfortunately, the Nigerian society has little or no support systems for this kind of situation. Little or no counselling services. It's been mostly left to the church to deal with. What happens when the man doesn't go to church? What happens when the woman doesn't believe in spiritual intervention? These women are raising daughters. Their daughters are hearing and seeing how they speak to and treat their husband. What kind of wives will they grow up to become? Those that treat their husbands as kings or those that believe husbands are nothing but verbal punching bags? We've all agreed and rightfully so that a man has no business hitting his wife. So how then do you stop a wife raining verbal missiles at you? Leave the house? Okay. But you'll return and it will continue. What next? Leave again? For how long? Recently, I visited a senior friend, an important man in the society and while we were downstairs gisting, the voice of his wife could be heard upstairs. She was spewing unimaginable bile against the man. She called him all sorts of unprintable names. Impotent, wretched fool, miserable man that was nothing when she married him, etc. This is a well respected man. A father of 4 children. She tore at his very core and mocked everything society respected him for. She said he'd soon crash and she'll be there to laugh at him. I was so uncomfortable as I beheld the man. He was shrunken before me. He was deflated. He tried to gamefully continue the gist to distract me but it was not working. The woman's vitriol was a ceaseless torrent. Uncomfortable silence ensued. I excused myself and left his house. I was really sad. You want to know the truth? This is what most men go through in their houses. They labour and toil and build respect but when they return home, the one who ought to speak to the king in them tears them to shreds and tries to deflate their self-esteem. When they are outside, they try to act cheerful and happy but back home, they are shrivelled because the person they live with makes it a point of duty to verbally assault them. A sad story comes to mind. There was recently a Nigerian Ambassador who was recalled because his wife released a story to the press that he beat her. She also released pictures showing fresh injuries on her body ostensibly inflicted by the man. In a dramatic twist, their children came out to debunk the stories and said their mother faked the injuries to embarrass their dad. Grown up children. A particular sentence by the 1st son saddened me. He said it was as if their mum woke up every morning with one mission in life: how to make their dad miserable. They said they were witnesses to how their mum constantly harassed and abused their dad and wanted the whole world to know that their dad was not who their mum was painting him to be. Yes, opinion shifted on the scandal but the damage had been done. The Ambassador was recalled and nobody heard from him again. A family is currently at odds with the widow of their son and brother. The wife was constantly verbally assaulting him. Nobody wanted to visit them because each time they were around, it was always quarrel and the wife would call him unprintable names. Even in their presence. When they try to interfere, she will give them their own. The man died recently of heart-attack caused by high blood pressure. He was in his late 40s. The family insists his wife sent him to his early grave with her verbal torments. Our bars are filled with men who are afraid to go home to their wives for fear of what verbal torment they will go through. Men are finding every excuse to travel because they'll rather be anywhere than in their own homes. Everybody is focusing on men as culprits in domestic abuse. Who is talking to the women? - Author Anonymous 1 Like |
| Family › Re: Nairaland Easter Giveaway 2022 by QuinModah(f): 12:30pm On Apr 17, 2022 |
MARYIAN:What type of business? 1 Like |
| Family › Re: Nairaland Easter Giveaway 2022 by QuinModah(f): 12:30pm On Apr 17, 2022 |
Cuttycool:What's your location? |
| Family › Re: Nairaland Easter Giveaway 2022 by QuinModah(f): 12:29pm On Apr 17, 2022 |
Chiden:Nice one, you mind learning crypto join m y c r y p t o n g academy on telegram. |
| Family › Re: Married Women: The Skyrocketing Rise In Adultery In Nigeria. by QuinModah(f): 12:25pm On Apr 17, 2022 |
Rawhumper: |
| Family › Re: Don’t Lose Guard With Your Daughters by QuinModah(op): 12:19pm On Apr 17, 2022 |
Permission Granted eniteden: 1 Like |
| Family › Re: Don’t Lose Guard With Your Daughters by QuinModah(op): 12:11pm On Apr 17, 2022 |
kabanayol9:Yes you can. 1 Like |
| Family › Re: Don’t Lose Guard With Your Daughters by QuinModah(op): 12:06pm On Apr 17, 2022 |
NorthSerious:This is a big lie. |
| Family › Re: Don’t Lose Guard With Your Daughters by QuinModah(op): 8:54am On Apr 17, 2022 |
Lordofalmajiri:How will you know th odors? |
| Family › Re: Don’t Lose Guard With Your Daughters by QuinModah(op): 7:48am On Apr 17, 2022 |
imagrg:They are not normal in that part of the Nigeria. 4 Likes |
| Family › Re: Don’t Lose Guard With Your Daughters by QuinModah(op): 7:44am On Apr 17, 2022 |
 basilo101: |
| Family › Re: Don’t Lose Guard With Your Daughters by QuinModah(op): 7:36am On Apr 17, 2022 |
bukatyne:Unfortunately I couldn't. |
| Family › Re: Don’t Lose Guard With Your Daughters by QuinModah(op): 7:29am On Apr 17, 2022 |
 Saao: |
| Family › Re: Don’t Lose Guard With Your Daughters by QuinModah(op): 7:27am On Apr 17, 2022 |
Whatever rocls your boat subsidywise18: |
| Family › Re: Don’t Lose Guard With Your Daughters by QuinModah(op): 7:20am On Apr 17, 2022 |
emmanuelbrown26:We should kill the girl abi? 1 Like |
| Family › Re: Don’t Lose Guard With Your Daughters by QuinModah(op): 7:18am On Apr 17, 2022 |
v2:Cannot find it on play store |
| Family › Re: Don’t Lose Guard With Your Daughters by QuinModah(op): 7:18am On Apr 17, 2022 |
bsalawu: |
| Romance › Re: Men And Women Read Carefully!!! by QuinModah(op): 3:09pm On Apr 16, 2022 |
 Prettygirl200: |
| Family › Re: Nairaland Easter Giveaway 2022 by QuinModah(f): 3:04pm On Apr 16, 2022 |
Ouchbabe:but ypuboaybypur tithes and offerings to your pastor, see your sense entitlement. |
| Family › Don’t Lose Guard With Your Daughters by QuinModah(op): 1:59pm On Apr 16, 2022 |
*DON’T LOSE GUARD WITH YOUR DAUGHTERS* You can't be too sure... I watched a skit a few minutes ago and I remembered an incident that happened last year. I have her permission to share without revealing names or locations. Also some details have been changed. A mother asked to use her fifteen year old daughter’s phone for some days while her own phone was being repaired. WhatsApp messages dropped on the phone. Her daughter had passworded her WhatsApp so she couldn’t see the messages. Out of curiosity, she tried some passwords and her daughter’s birthday was the password. She opened the WhatsApp and almost died, with the shock of what she saw. A man in the next building had been chatting with her daughter. He had made several sexual advances towards her, which the daughter refused. He was adamant. He pursued her. He sent her recharge cards, came to her school to give her gifts and money. He asked her if she had a boyfriend or have ever had intimacy, she said no. He pursued her some more. He requested for her pictures, almost unclad, which she initially refused to send him but when he sent his, she sent hers. It was nothing too revealing as she was in her bra and underwear. He taught her how to password her WhatsApp. Then he pushed for more. He wanted to see her completely nude. She couldn’t take such a picture because she shared a room with her siblings. He asked her to lock herself in the bathroom for them to have a video call. She saw messages like “Did you like what you saw?” “ Stop being shy around me.” “Why are you afraid? Nobody will see you.” He sent a picture of his nudity to her. A girl of fifteen! It became terrifying when her daughter sent a chat saying she saw him with his wife the other night and he ignored her. She knew her daughter had fallen and it was a matter of time before the guy had his way. She contacted me and asked me for advice. I have helped her in the past so she felt she could confide in me. The truth is, when such a thing happens, you have to get someone who will treat the man’s Bleep-up very well. Who is the person who will be angry enough to do that  No other person than her father.She was scared her husband will dump the blame on her. She was looking for another way to handle it without him. I told her, “If you handle it quietly, the man will be wiser and will ensure he won’t be caught since he is obsessed with your daughter that he patiently groomed her. It is best he is disgraced and only her father will do that unless he is a useless man that’s when he will keep quiet.” I told her she is lucky the girl hadn’t agreed to be alone with the man anywhere. It was getting close to that. Her husband didn’t disappoint me. Immediately he read the chats and saw the ‘manhood’ he took off to the man’s house that night. The wife ran after him. He banged continuously on the gate. Well, the man got what was coming to him. He was disgraced. The evidence of their chats were there. His neighbours were shocked because he portrayed a picture of a saint but he was the devil and also a paedophile. The husband wanted to take the matter to the Police but everyone begged. The landlord of their house and the man’s house also appealed to him not to escalate the matter. They begged him not to expose his chats on social media as his wife, my friend, had promised to do. The culprit’s wife left him. He eventually had to move out of the house immediately the rent was due. The disgrace was too much for them to handle. Everywhere he went in the neighborhood, mothers were wary of him around their daughters. They have collected the phones from their children. If you are not in university, no more phones. How did they handle the girl? I asked them not to beat her. But the father refused to listen. He said she had brought disgrace to the household. He wanted to send her to the village but I stopped him. She needed therapy not to be shamed. I told the mother to take her to see a psychologist at Yaba left. It worked! Older men groom very young girls and turn them into sex slaves. It was what this man was doing. The kind of chats they had was irritating coming from a grown man. He was able to make her do some of the things he wanted by doing them first. That phone your daughter holds very dear to her heart, please once in a while, check it. Make sure she is not being groomed for someone’s perversion. Check what she is doing and advise her. Anyone younger than sixteen shouldn’t be on social media. Anyone still in secondary school shouldn’t be there too, regardless of their age. Girls have been lured to travel abroad to be sex slaves, all by grooming or greed. They make them hate their families and believe they are the only ones that love them . They give them attention and say sweet things to them often. It is easy to fall for such. Teach your children these signs and also do not expose them unnecessarily to these men. Paedophiles are evolving. They are getting smarter. We have to keep our girls safe. I love you all. 1111 Likes 143 Shares |
| Jobs/Vacancies › Re: Salary At White Soul Motors by QuinModah(f): 1:33pm On Apr 16, 2022 |
Babyface33:Go and work there and come back and give us review. |
| Jobs/Vacancies › Re: Jobs In/around Badagry Lagos State by QuinModah(f): 1:29pm On Apr 16, 2022 |
kingBlaq:have you tried the schools in your areas, how about real estate or starting a food business? Look at your environment what's the business you can do |
| Romance › Re: Men And Women Read Carefully!!! by QuinModah(op): 1:19pm On Apr 16, 2022 |
Nonexisting:Go and sit down |
| Romance › Re: Why Are Guys Scared Of Approaching Female In The Armed Forces? by QuinModah(op): 12:41pm On Apr 16, 2022 |
Please...for those who have been sending me PMs, please do not take it that I deliberately ignored you. The email account I used in signing up for Nairaland is no longer valid. I will open another email account where i may be reached much later. Would have dropped my digits but the last time I did, antispam bot banned me. |
| Romance › Re: Me And My Wife, Now See Sex As Stress... by QuinModah(f): 12:18pm On Apr 16, 2022 |
Cutehector:Are you married? 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Romance › Re: Me And My Wife, Now See Sex As Stress... by QuinModah(f): 12:17pm On Apr 16, 2022 |
yinkaOdutuyo:Lol! Shebi na una dey talk say eating egusi everytime you will loow to taste ogbono |
| Romance › Re: Men And Women Read Carefully!!! by QuinModah(op): 11:18am On Apr 16, 2022 |
 Domzie19: |
(Modified: I wouldn't mind graphic designing, I'm passionate about it Sha)1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 ... 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 (of 103 pages)