₦airaland Forum

Jazmiynne:
Hallelujah!


“Congratulations, we are pleased to inform you that you were successful during the interview process, the…”

Akin did not wait for the caller to complete his sentence, he had heard enough. Flinging the phone, he climbed on the mattress singing “Hallelujah! O ti se fun mi… O ti se fun mi… Olorun Eleda mi modupe o!” The noise immediately drew Titi into the room, running and struggling to catch her breathe as she watched her husband with surprise.

“Oko mi, ki lo de?’ The perplexed woman asked. The look on her face told him she had asked before. For an answer, he hugged her, swirled her around, gave her a full kiss on her lips as he proudly announced, “I have the honor to tell you my darling, your husband now has a job!” For a second, it did not quite register, and when it did, she screamed! Dancing and singing at the same time, almost squeezing life out her husband in a tight hug, she gave praises.

Then she released his hands and asked, “What is the name of the company?” “What role?” “How much are they offering?” “When are you resuming?” “Is it here in Lagos?” The questions came all in a torrent. As soon as they did, it suddenly occurred to Akin that he really had no answer to her questions. He had not waited to hear out the caller. Considering that he had attended four different interviews last month alone, it was not easy to take a wild guess.

“Ehrrmmm… You see… I don’t actually know”

Titi paused and frowned. What did he mean? She had mentally concluded that for Akin to rejoice so greatly, it must be Curbana Industries. In fact, she had calculated how to disburse the money in her mind. The landlord was already breathing down their necks and just a few minutes ago, Iya Nneka had refused to borrow her Forty thousand naira to pay Junior’s school fees. The principal had every reason to get upset, who would not? A student owing fees for two consecutive sessions was definitely ‘bad market’. Now that her husband had a job, Devil receive your shame!

However, the increasing confusion on Akin’s face did not seem to align with her thoughts. The young man’s thoughts were racing. Which of the four firms had called? He dialed the number for the third time, “You are not allowed to call this number”.

Frustrated with the automated response ‘witch’, he flung the phone again and turned to his wife. “Ife let us hope they would call back. You see, I did not really hear the caller well, so I do not know which of the firms. Nonetheless, we bless God. The light at the end of the tunnel is shining through”.

Armed with her husband’s soothing words, Titi resumed her praise songs and dancing. Soon, their neighbors were trooping in to bid their congratulations to the couple. It was a miracle; her husband had gotten a job after 2 years of feeding from hand to mouth on next to nothing.

Later in the evening, Akin strolled into the cyber café; perhaps the company would send a mail.
Sure enough, there was a mail waiting for him in his mailbox titled:
Curbana Industries Limited – Congratulations
“Wow!” he screamed as soon as he saw the heading, simultaneously dialing Titi’s number and at the same time opening the mail.

“Iyawo mi, Curbana Industries ni o”
“Curbana! Eledumare Oba! When are you resuming?” Titi screamed.

However, her husband could no longer hear her even though he held the phone to his ear. Akin’s head drummed with pounding aches, drowning every other sound as he read the body of the mail:

“Congratulations Akin Ademola. We are pleased to inform you that you were successful at the interview process stage 3. The process for the final interview stage would be mailed to you shortly.”



Inspired by: “How Much Salary Is Enough In This Economy”. FP/25thAug2017.

This is funny and very well written, but no surprises sha

Although I think Nigerians are not usually so loud. We like to keep personal things like this really close so that 'our enemies' don't jinx it for us.

Good one, Jazzmyne! As usual.

Wow, Congrats guys. Skarlett, Missnande, Gmike2rule and Piroux.

Over twenty contestants began this grueling journey but only the four of you reached finals. Some might complain here and there about whatever but we all knew what we were getting into before the contest started.

I am most proud of Piroux and Missnande. Piroux, I had to let you go at some point and it really pained me at the time but you made it to the finals and I'm so glad. Your writing consistently improved as the contest went on and you deserve to be among the finalists.

Missnande, I stole you from another judge and it was probably the best steal I made. It's not luck that got you to the finals, it's your talent and good work.

I urge you all to keep writing and not let it end here with this contest. Nairaland and the world needs to read your stories.

Divepen1, thanks for this opportunity. I believe I did my part to the best of my ability and experience. It was really interesting while it lasted, (especially on the WhatsApp group. Hehehehe )

And to my fellow judges, larrysun and AudreyTimms....It was great working alongside you guys.

illicit:
repogirl shd come and do depth analysis now

Is someone still sore from losing?

illicit:
Well I apologise that I have to disagree with your judgement in the first place.

No wahala, you are a very good writer with an engaging style of writing.

Don't let your writing end with this contest.

ProFuhrer:
Run to the sexuality section and table your grievance. Let the horde march to your aid!

The horde can vote for him to move on to the next stage.

illicit:
@repogirl
people write about robbery, rape, murder, arson, espionage, drugs etc
Its just literature it dont have to appeal to u personally na....

Yeah, what doesn't appeal to me is the emptiness of the story. I write erotica but it's got to have some depth. A good story has depth.
How can I judge something favourably if I don't think it is good? What kind of judge would I be?

There was no emotion, no feeling, nothing. Just words strung together. Even if you wanted to write this, it could have been done beautifully with the right words.

You watch talent shows and all that, do the judges pick a contestant who in their opinion, didn't do well? Doesn't make sense na.

illicit:
No, no, no, I disagree with the point that repogirl raised that my entry might not be fit for the competition, hows that?
It wasnt stated that we were to write on any particular topic or area....

You were not disqualified, were you?

I said 'I didnt think it was the sort of thing for the contest' not that it was unfit.
To think that was all you saw and chose to ignore where I said it lacked depth. The simple thing is creativity was absent in your work and when compared with the entry from your opponent, her's wins. So there's no foul play here.

It just wasn't enough to take you to the next stage. It's not the first time I'm saying this to a contestant.

ProFuhrer:
Why is it crass? It might not appeal to you but it is still literature.

last time I checked, I believe I was the judge. So if his entry doesn't appeal to me, of what use is it?

Illicit, your entry lacked depth and I don't think it's the sort of thing for the competition. To me, it seemed like a joke and didn't leave any good or memorable impression.

It is because of these reasons that I've chosen Missnande to move forward. I hope the votes keep you anyway, Illicit.

Congrats Missnande, keep this up as you go into next stage and you have a good chance of winning the contest.

illicit:
The Long and Short of It....



It went in finally.

Moistly.

In. Out. In. Out....

It was going down....

'Its coming' - he whispered.

' Its too long' she moaned....

Then it erupted!!!

Hmm.... Is this what I think it is? Crass, Illicit, just crass!

Missnande:
OMG I'm sorry I mistook for repogirl.

No wahala, he's my unrelated younger bro. We can be mistaken for each other.

Very good work on your entry BTW. A suicide note, I presume?

EmperorLee:
Egbon mii i no know say u go catch me. Diverting back to #TeamRepogirl..

Hehehe! Good! We are winning this anyway.

EmperorLee:
Porting straight to #TeamLarrysun #TeamSkarlett

Porting from where? Are you not my Aburo again?

Congrats Missnande, good to see you're still in the contest.

Hello Contestants,

Voting has been extended till 10pm tomorrow. So, keep them coming.

Cc:
KimberlyWest
GSteve001
Missnande
OluwabuqqyYOLO
Gmike2Rule