₦airaland Forum

Like a couple of people have said, one can be natural and sophisticated at the same time.

I personally do not attribute any particular fashion style to be indicative of a sophisticated woman. It's more about her perception of the world and the knowledge she posseses, coupled with the humbling acknowledgement of the fact that her life experience, however so broad, is still infinitesimal.

Nevertheless, whether a woman chooses to wear brazilian hair or not doesn't really have much to do with how sophisticated she is. We all have varying superficial perceptions of beauty. To some women, long silky is beautiful and that's how they wanna look. To others, short kinky is just perfect and they wear it and own it.

OP, don't flatter yourself. Different women choose to wear attachments for a whole list of reasons. It ain't all about men.

Sijo01:
if its wat am finking
its definitely Men.

What are you thinking?

lepasharon:
black men are perverts,

Thanks for the compliment.

Nayah:
Poster, yes us true as for the reverse, if I'm strong as a woman and I realize things it's because I have great support from my husband

That's good.

However, there are many people that were single-handedly raised by so-called baby-mamas that end becoming incredibly successful individuals.

If the quotation is open to several interpretations then the entire argument is mute.

The woman being referenced in the quote is the romantic partner/wife, not the mother, sister, or friend.

Konjour:
That quote doesn't apply to all cases of successful men. Hell,if there are "independent" women who claim they can/do fend for

themselves successfully without the assistance of a man,why shouldn't there be "independent" successful men.

However,if the context of the "woman" goes beyond a female partner,then the scope of the quote becomes broader as there are

also Mothers(and Fathers) who are the bedrocks of their's sons' success stories,nevertheless that doesn't apply to everyone also.

Summarily,that quote is thoughtful,but NOT true.

*Waiting for the thread of " Behind every successful Woman is a Man." to vindicate my post.

Stellar!

Behind Every Successful Man Is A Woman / Behind Every Failed Man Is A Girl.

I'm not a woman, but if was, I would be offended by this quotation.

@ Repubocrat
As usual with black woman anything worth doing is worth doing well

Yes classy types,

like Robert De Niro, David Bowie, Mats Carlston (This President of Nixon Peabody LLP, has a firm recognized as a Global 100 law firm), Robin Thicke, Congressman William Cohen, George Lucas (director ofstar wars), Justin Chambers (greys anatomy), Mr Big from sex and the city (can't remember his real name), Olivier Martinez, billionaire Russian  Vladimir Doronin, Celebrity chef Wolfgang Puck,

What about Kevin Federline?

Should I continue. . .

I like Heidi klum as I will always respect business acumen. She is great and has a beautiful family and made a success of herself. Making mistakes has absolutely nothing to do with class (a child is never a mistake). I never mentioned class, you guys did. There are loads of people with loads of money but no class.

I described Heidi as a classy woman, and this was your rebuttal.

I like heidi klum and will not call her classless but she was pregnant of a man over twice her age when she started dating seal. How any men of any race would date a woman pregnant with another mans child?

Seems like a contradiction.

You guys are a joke, you were the first to mention celebrities (refer to first page of the topic) angelina jolie, djimon housou, Paris Hilton pictures,

You guys, as in all the guys on this thread? See, it would  be best to address us individually because we all have different agendas on this thread. I barely even understand wtf that nolongthing is talking about.

Do you really think I would be using Paris as an example?

What difference does it make? I was merely using Paris as an example of a low-class white woman that still does not black men, to justify my argument that the people/race we choose or choose not to date has no bearing on how classy or classless we are.

Now, if you were in agreement with that from the get go, then I apologize for wasting your time, but if not, then my post still stands.

ahahahahahahahaha      Lol I am the total opposite of ghetto, I swear a lot as I work with guys and we have banter and jokes and now i'm used to it. Its no big deal (sorry mum) if you don't like it you can fuc k off the site. Cheers.

Was this directed at me because I never commented of you being ghetto? Nothing wrong with being ghetto btw. No need to be an elitist and get all dramatic. You post an opinion, I agree or disagree, and you reciprocate. Chikena?

Kutey:
I like heidi klum and will not call her classless but she was pregnant of a man over twice her age when she started dating seal. How any men of any race would date a woman pregnant with another mans child?

Ok, no qualms. Heidi Klum is another classless white woman that dates black men. I concede.

How about that miss Ireland chick dating a nigerian guy? Is she classless too?

Better yet, what kind of white men date black women? The classy or the crappy ones?

I will pick a woman with a diploma in engineering before I pick one with a Phd in psychology.

@kutey, you need to keep it real.

There are also black men chasing low class black women, and there are white men chasing low class white women.

In addition, you are under the impression that the social lifestyle among celebrities can be a good indicator what peasants like me, you, and the general public do in our dating lives, but you're wrong.

However, for argument's sake, I'll use the dating lives of a couple of celebrities to disagree with your ludicrous claim that classy white women do not date black men.

Angelina Jolie: Classy woman, Doesn't date black men.
Paris Hilton: Hood rat scum bag. Nevertheless, she still doesn't date black men.
Kim Kardashian: Not so classy. She dates black men.
Heidi klum: As classy as any woman regardless of race can possibly get. She's married to a black man.

The point I'm trying to make here is that a woman's (black, white, asian, etc.) decision to date or not date black men does not correlate to how classy or classless she is. There are many many classless white women that wouldn't touch a black man with a ten foot pole even if her life depended on it.

all4naija:
Not only that at the end have a family with kids! Race related matter like this one is a disease that is really disturbing to the mind health of any individual. I see beyond race and I go for whoever I love, being it White, Red, yellow, Black or whatever color!

Can you elaborate on the highlighted part a little bit. 

all4naija:
The truth is that White men look effeminate when compare to Back men. That is, Black men can stand rigorous situation and maybe manly in bed. Naturally, Black men seem to be more attractive than White men(who are too artificial and frail looking).

Yes, biology has proven that black men are generally more masculine but not every woman prefers quintessential traits of masculinity. Believe it or not, but many women think most black men are hyper masculine.

all4naija:
Naturally, Black men are more attractive because they seem to be manly than the White men. So what is wrong in my observation while I relate with all people regardless of their race?

Anybody with an ounce of awareness will know that you're wrong. An overwhelming majority of white women don't give  a cra.p about black men.

I'll also add on a side note that an overwhelming majority of black men, even in america, are with black women. As a matter of fact, there was a study done a couple of years ago which showed that 95% of married black men are actually married to black women. The impression that black dudes are courting white women in droves is propaganda.

Olodostein:
"Logic" on Nairaland? Did you just discover that word? Try again bro. And to burst your bubble, Big grammar won't help either.

Let's start again. What have I said that you disagree with? Why do you disagree with it?

See, it boils down to this for me, and anyone is open to disagree.

There are black women that only date black men for reasons that simply do not matter in the greater scheme of things because we're all entitled to make our own decisions. If you only date black men, then you can not ridicule a black man for choosing to date only non-black women regardless of the reasons. It's hypocritical.

I've heard many comments about how non-black women see many black men as merely instruments for their sex.ual gratification. So what? There are black women that see other black men strictly for sex.ual gratification. There are white women that see certain white men strictly for sex.ual gratification. Why is a white woman seeing a black man as merely a sex.ual being more controversial than the rest? 

Point being, we all need to keep it real and stop being hypocrites. 

Olodostein:
You started well and ended badly. You would have just stuck with your objectivity. Now, I am beginning to wonder if you are one of those self loathing black men.

You're entitled to make fallacious presumptions, but I would like you to look up the term, "Ad Hominem."

Being a self hating black man or not doesn't make a difference, because my argument is there for you to counter with logic. If you can stick to doing that then we might make progress here.

What have you achieved through hard work?

Good grades in school led to a good salary post graduation. Consistent integrity and respect for others led to the possession of reliable friends.

Sorry to disappoint you, but my hard-working nature had little to do with my dating life. Many lazy people are in equally happy relationships.

Are you one of those who take pride in how many white women you have ynashed?

No, but again, I'm not sure why the answer to this question bares any relevance to the credibility of my argument.

Floxyluv:
I concur. Black is beauty, .

The idea of black being beauty is just as non-sensical as a claim that blacks are ugly.

for the fact that black ladies do not like dating other race do not make them unattractive.

I can respect that.

I'll even add that I'm suspicious of people that choose to date a certain race for reasons other than physical attraction. I can understand if a man/woman is only attracted to white/black looking men/women, but I can't help but shake my head when they start factoring supposed behaviours/personalities of certain races  as their reason to date said race. That's myopia at its best; or shall I say, "At its worst."

how dare ANY BLACK MAN (SHELL) to support the disrespect of the very women who look like
and reflect the beauty of your fore mothers. SHAME ON YOU!

Are you implying that I'm obligated to respect black women simply because she possesses the same skin colour as my mother? That makes no sense.

Just because my mother is responsible and loving doesn't mean all black women are responsible and loving. I don't respect black women or black men etc. I respect good people, period. Not all blacks are good people.

The irony here is that you are accusing this nolongthing guy of being racist, but your comments clearly show you're just as prejudiced as he is.

I truly feel bad for all these pseudo secure blacks that have their identity revolving around being black, especially Nigerians for that matter. Seriously guys, what the heck is black pride? How about you focus on taking pride in something you actually achieved through hard work? You might like it.

The One:
Guy, entry level petroleum engineers make more than $100k a year in Nigeria (Exxon, Mobil & Total). I'm not sure about Shell though.

Thanks for the reply.

My currency conversion was a little faulty. The guys I was talking about in my previous post were asking for 15million naira. I mistook 15million naira for $90k, but it's actually about a $100k, so you're right.  Nevertheless, that's mad cash for an entry level position.

@everyone: You see, a lot of these comments from the men prove that their egos can easily be bruised in such situations. A lot of you men are talking about severe beatings over a slap. I'm not saying that a slap is a small thing but you all are taking it to the next level in your reactions.

What's wrong with taking it to the next level? Oh yea, I forgot! It's only wrong when men take it to the next level huh?

Your "an eye for an eye" philosophy is fallacious. It stopped being an eye for an eye the moment he/she decided to escalate a verbal confrontation into a physically violent encounter.

Why in the world should I have to retaliate with only an equally painful slap when she wasn't fair enough to stick to verbal insults.

Depends on the relationship with the lady. If it's a friend or an acquaintance, I'll let it slide and walk away. However, I will definitely retaliate if some random stranger slapped me after some trivial disagreement or what not.

Funny enough, I've never hit/slapped another human being before. Not even a guy. If I'm angry enough to consider hitting you, then I won't care one bit if you were a male or female.

Read the thread in its entirety out of curiosity, because TEPNG recently came to the states to recruit some engineers and after interviews, I got an email from them 3 weeks later which said they would wish to proceed to the next step of the recruitment process which is probably another interview.

They asked me what salary I anticipated. I said $70-80k a year, and I was just being modest. Other Naija guys that interviewed were asking for $90k, and they were pretty confident about their demand.

Over here, entry level petroleum guys from Royal Dutch Shell and Exxonmobil make nothing less than a $100k a year right out of school. Remember I said "Petroleum" guys especially drilling engineers. These figures don't apply to process engineers, or reservoir and completions specialties.

I should also add that servicing companies don't pay squat when compared to the operators.

All I have to say to OP is that you owe no allegiance to your race. Live your life for you, and the people that care about you, and this applies to both platonic and romantic relationships.

You can never betray your race, because you should have no racial obligations to begin with.

I always give people the benefit of the doubt that they wouldn't make far-fetched presumptions about me based on my race, tribe and w/e other status. Fortunately, I've never been dissapointed.

C'mon OP! Why would you want to marry a woman that visit her ex-boyfriend's facebook page after every confrontation? I can only imagine the feeling of inadequacy you've been subjected to by her insensitive acts.

Do not propose! What good is a marriage in disarray going to do you?

[quote author=~Mikael~ link=topic=771501.msg9250130#msg9250130 date=1317385668][size=14pt][font=gabriola]He has to prove that he is Matured enough to be a Husband, not just a man!. . . .
He has to prove that he's not just going to be a husband, but a father. . .
He has to prove that he's going to help her relegate her weakness, not amplify them. . .
Is he easily prone to anger?
Does he have a forgiving spirit?
e.t.c. . . . .
font][/size][/quote]These are all questions one should be able to answer from mere daily observations, without having to ask.

With that said,  "Can you take care of me?" is a stupid question in the sense that one shouldn't have to ask to know.

[quote author=omo_to_dun link=topic=764506.msg9194082#msg9194082 date=1316637996]
Absolutely. But why pidgin English , instead of standard English?[/quote]My comments are being misconstrued.

Standard English takes utmost precedence. Pidgin comes second. All other indigenous languages are 3rd, 4th to the 259th! But yes! Standard english is the no-brainer choice.

igbo boy:
^^^inferiority complex go kill naija i swear, what happened to valuing our own indigenous languages?

You are bringing jamaica into it your analogies are re.tarded. Jamaicans for one are lost people, they dont know where they are from (i dont mean africa) they were brainwashed by the whites hence their patois).

We are in our native land and yet we want to speak a language that was derived from another language not native to our lands? your head dey shake wella,

I like pdgin but when it comes to official na indigienous languages all the way (for me na igbo)

Myopia is a disease!

How the heck is the world supposed to venture into our economy if they can't communicate with us.  I reckon your myopic views would agree that a nation can survive in isolation.

[quote author=omo_to_dun link=topic=764506.msg9193896#msg9193896 date=1316635743]
You are merely observing the immediate benefits of this so-called pseudo efficient communication. The world is becoming one and if we are to successfully compete with other nations, we have to look beyond superficial gains and strive to promote a language that not only will benefit our citizens but will also empower and enable them to rub shoulders with their foreign counterparts. In this capacity we only have two options: our indigenous languages or the English language.

I support the latter for the following reasons:

[list]
[li]More than 99% of the books that any educated person in Nigerian has ever read was written in English.[/li]
[li]We are currently conversing using the English language, not pidgin, not our indigenous languages, and not any other language.[/li]
[li]English is the official language of Nigeria.[/li]
[li]Those who understand and/or speak pidgin can understand formal English; the reverse is not always the case.[/li]
[li]The amount of work it would take to transcribe all the textbooks and scholarly works to our indigenous languages or even Pidgin would be so gargantuan as to be impractical.[/li]
[/list]


Additionally, the irony of folks using the English Language to coherently express their opinions while advocating for Pidgin is not only heartwarming, but also fascinating. Not everyone in Nigeria speaks pidgin fluently. There are so many thoughts that you cannot express in Pidgin. As a man who speaks Yoruba with almost the same ease as that which an American fat boy eats cake, I can authoritatively tell you that there are no pidgin equivalents for proverbs, tons of phrases, native terms, etc. My Pidgin is not weak, seeing as I am an Edo boy, but if Nigerians should stick with a language, it should be English. After all, could I have written all the aforementioned in Pidgin, or in Yoruba? Could you? No. I doubt it. [/quote]If you read the entire thread, you would notice that I support English.

My present argument is that if languages can be ranked according to superiority, then Pidgin takes precedence over every other indigenous language.

Nevertheless, all methods of communication has their qwirks. The existence of proverbs and idioms in indigenous languages falls short on the priority scale in comparison to pidgin's ability to cross ethnic lines. I'll admit that pidgin is apparently not globally established, but from a practical standpoint, having all Nigerians Speak pidgin would be easier than having all Nigerians speak one indigenous language.