₦airaland Forum

HYDEEE:
Use style take ask op make he cut for you, nobody go laugh you.

@RTID I day this guy back o with my own plate o.

my boss I fit come cook for you

OloYeOfEgbE:
Psheww

Are the 2 chicken the same.. ? Did you see carrot there.? Even shrimps you nor put. NO DODO..

gettout

nah the things I see around I use cook am ...nah for night I buy stuffs

If only you people know how much this set of clothes cost, oya be buying the clothes for me, morality police. She's really beautiful in the clothes, agreed, but can you stop policing people's dressing?

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10 Things Women Use Or Do But Can't Tell Why Or What It's For.

1). Micro Blading: When I first heard this, I thought it was some sort of surgical procedure.

2). Frontals: We don't understand why you have to buy a wig, then still have to buy frontals too. It's just like buying a car, then buying the doors seperate.

3). The Difference Between Human Hair, Synthetic And Blend: No dey confuse our papa, abeg. Hair na Hair.

4). Why Always Ultra Comes In Blue And Pink Colour. I know this one, but not many men know.

5). The Ikpume (stone) in y'all's bathroom, is it for killing lizard?

6). Why do y'all have up to 4 towels that no one dare uses?

7). That Goalkeeper glove in the bathroom, are you practicing on becoming the next David De Gea?

. Why do you freak out when we use your soap by mistake, but won't think twice before using our expensive Dettol soap to wash your pant?

9). Edges: If rat don chop your hair finish, you rest nah.

10). Why do you lie to your fellow women telling them it's Blue Seal you use, when they ask for your skincare routine?

Dear co bosses, minimize the way you relate with your employees. They are not your brothers, friends, sisters or spouse.

Do not be over familiar with your employees or apprentices if you still want them to maintain the level of respect they have for you.

Place boundaries, limits. They are people you employed, so your conversation with them should not over-exceed business/work related talks.

Be nice to them always, laugh and smile with them when you should, have meaningful conversations and let them gain profitable knowledge from you, not the other way round.

I was triggered to write this when i heard my neighbor narrating to his boys yesterday how he hanged this girl's leg in a hotel room and how he sucked from her breast, a married man.

It's the most terrible thing I ever experienced.

Bukola94:
Apart from rent been expensive, some landlords are trouble some & may set u up. People you rent houses to also may Bleep you up. We have been seeing cases and hearing of cases

you de find excuse

Gangster1ms:
I'm 40 and i live with my parents
My dad built a massive mansion with enough rooms, so why waste money living somewhere else if it's not outside the country?

lies do you know what is mansion?

FRANCISTOWN:
It's the truth bruv. Here in Nigeria, we just like mounting unnecessary pressure on people , because we are too egoistical and dumb.

That's why you'll see some people come out to say "If you've not made your first 1million by 25, you are a failure" , "if you are 25 and you don't have your own house , you are not a man enough", "if you are 25 and you are still in your parents house, you are lazy and weak".

So what happens to someone who makes his first 1million at 25 and blows all his money before 30? And someone who makes his first 1 million at 30 and later goes on to be a billionaire?
I know when I made my first big money, and how it went all off, because I was too young to understand the principle of money.

What happens to someone who moves out of his parents' house at 19 but returns at 40 because he no longer has shit goin on for him, and someone who moves out at 40 and later goes on to own estates and malibles.

In India, most of the family live together. No matter how rich you are, you'll live with your extended family.

As a man, if you are still living with your parents at 40, you are not a failure. If you've still not made your first 1million at 30 you are not a failure.

Just be sure within yourself that you are doing something to change the situation. As long as you are not idle. You are a champ.

boss send me your account number make you use drink small drink

You just said my mind chairmo

Imagination wan injure this one

These are some simple things 👌
Maybe y'all should change your circle of girls

virginprincess:
My kind of man,I hate anything public, privacy is the best

I just like that,for example Today happens to be my birthday but I didn't tell a single person not even my best friend, even my family members forgot because I don't publicize it.I love a private and lowkey life.

happy birthday to you

You're a Big Guy
You spend ₦200k on a girl ,for her birthday and u even gave her ₦50k, to make her hair ....

Weeks later ur friend told u to come and buy land where he bought his, and invest ur money.
U asked how much and he replied ₦750k
U said to him that u can’t buy that kind of land bcuz it's not in a developed area

Some months later u went broke
U asked that girlfriend to give u ₦2k to survive.
She said she doesn't have and start asking you why can't you borrow or go sort things out

Things got tough and later the girl left you for a Richer guy.

Later, that same friend of urs called u to come to his new house since he's celebrating it and u honored his invitation,
u got there and started asking stupíd Questions??
Is dis d same land u told me about d last time? He replied... Yes Everywhere look like London now? He smiled??

How much can I get land here now?
He said ₦2m and you start regretting..

my Advice
Spend your income with ur brain NOT with sláy Queens, forget those girls (some of them) are destiny killers....

Stop spending alot on your partner unless married and now your possession,
you can't get those back when things go wrong and bad, rather invest in your siblings,

Hustle now, forget clubbing, drinking, and smoking
When the money comes, MARRY, train ur kids , spend on ur wife, go on Vacations with ur family and u will never Regret it.....

Nothing runs a man down lyk a woman.
Don't involve urself with lots of them.
One is okay.
POVERTY IS REAL, AND no woman will want to marry a man without plans.

Bro Get Sense small

Spread Good Vibes
Get Focused
Stay Safe & Worry Less
Have A Blessed And Wonderful week ahead.

Truly women don't like good guys. Lemme quickly share my story.

In early 2017 I met Hannah. She was the perfect woman I've been looking for. The relationship was going smoothly and I was enjoying every bit of it. I do almost everything to make her happy.

In fact for the first time in my life I thought about marriage even though I wasn't financially and mentally ready compared to now, I just wanted to marry her. I've never been so in love like that in my life.

To cut the long story short, after like 6 months I noticed some changes in her. I felt she was hiding something. Sometimes when I call her she won't pick or sometimes quickly discharge me with one excuse or the other. So one day I called her and I asked her what could be going on. She started crying. She told me she had a guy she was dating before she met me and they've been together for a year but the issue is that the guy is a psychopath, a misogynist and a sadist. She told me he beats her on every slight provocation and she dare not even talk back at him, in fact when he talks and she doesn't say anything he will beat her for making him look like a barking dog. I was shocked. I found out the guy was out of Lagos for over 4 months before she met me, and now he's back. So she does visit him often.

I was in pain that how could I share my woman with someone else. She visited me one Saturday like that with a black eye and I asked her what happened to her eye. She lied that she hit her face on the wall, not until her friend told me she's lying that it was Mike that beat her, I confronted her and she admitted it was him who beat her.

Sometimes when I'm at work and I call her to check up on her, she'll boldly tell me she's with him cos obviously the guy is now the main chick while I was relegated to a side chick. I was playing the second fiddle. I go con dey imagine wetin the guy go dey do my babe. All the way she used to moan for me and shout give me harder baby. The thought alone drives me crazy.

I summoned courage and told her she should choose between me and him, but every time she keeps on telling me she will leave him soon. I was surprised why she didn't leave him despite the fact that the relationship was toxic and I treated her like a queen. This girl no gree leave the guy o and me na jumbo simp then..... I couldn't let go too. Not until my sister came to my rescue, she called her and gave her 7 day ultimatum that she either has to choose me or him. Guess what? she didn't leave either one of us. That was when I decided it was time to move on with my life. It was really hard but I had to move on. I was still living with my parents then so I had to even relocate to my brothers place in order to forget her completely. I found someone else after a few months. I cut off every form of communication with her.

8 months later, the security guard in my workplace called me on the telecom that I have a visitor waiting for me at the security post. I was surprised because I wasn't expecting anyone. Lo and behold it was her with a big baby bump! She was looking very haggard and unkept. I took her to a nearby restaurant and we sat down to talk. She's the first woman I'll ever take to my place of work.

I almost shed tears. She was begging me to take her back after delivering her baby. She was crying and I was really moved when she told me what she was going through. I obviously still love her but it was too late. She told me she doesn't even mind to be my side chick. Omoh I pity that girl that day. I told her I can't take her back. I had stopped being a simp. But I told her to reach out to me whenever she needed my help. Despite being pregnant that foolish guy still beat her and sent her out of the house when it was raining. She regretted her decisions big time.

We are still communicating sometimes till now. To make matter worse she don born second pikin, and now she's stuck, because the shege she dey see now pass the one wey she dey see before. I never wish her bad but she made the decision.

That was when I truly believed women love hard guys more than good guys. They take good guys as weak men and tough guys as strong men. The question is how u go take carry belle for guy wey dey beat you? After making a terrible decision you'll now come to tell us all guys are bad.

The story long pass that one I just say make I short am sha.

Places Men Neglect In A Woman's Body.

1). The Neck.

A lot of men neglect a woman's neck.

Guy! That part of her body is the key to unlocking the flood gate of heaven.

You see all those things you do to her lips, do it to neck instead and she'll flood her panties for 30 days and 30 Nights.

Just your hot breath on her neck alone is enough to send shock waves of magnitude 9.0 through her whole body system.

Plant soft kisses on her neck.

Use your tongue to lick that area.

Nibble on her neck while whispering sweet nonsense into her ears.

Suckle on her neck. Deep kiss her neck. Now, if you want to make her go mad, there's what is called necking.

Those kind of things giraffes do. Where you both rub your neck against each other's affectionately. Go from the left side to the right and keep interchanging.

She'll be the one reaching for your belt immediately.

When you're thrusting, instead of kissing her lips, kiss her neck instead.

2). The Fingers.

Many of you don't know that a woman's fingers are really sensitive.

You know the way little kids suck their fingers? Try sucking her fingers that way and see the magic. Especially for those women who find it hard getting aroused.

Play with her fingers. Tease them with your tongue. Nibble on the finger tip. Massage them gently if you can. Pay attention to the thumb. Suck it. I said suck it!

That shit drives them crazy! Before you know it, their panties will be like river Nigeria.

And you know the good thing about this finger thing, not everyone knows about it. Only few OGs like me do. So, endeavor to try it with your girl when next you're meeting and thank me later.

3). A woman's feet.

Guy! Of all the most underrated pleasure zones in the body, this is the highest.

It's even more arousing that the clitoris. You see that space in-between her toes? Take your tongue there and lick it thoroughly.

Suckle gentle on her toe nails. If you've got ice-cream pour it on her feet and lick it off with your tongue.

You could also give her a foot massage while using your tongue on her toes.

Sometimes, it's not that a woman finds it hard to get aroused. It's quite easy, you just have to find out what works for her.

Every woman's body is wired differently.

What might work for Amaka might not work for Chioma.

So, don't think the conventional way of turning woman A on will have the same effect on woman B.

Be open to exploring, until you unlock the keys to her fountain.

That river must flow!

Yeahhhhh answer

So, I want to give you people some life-saving hack.
Stop buying oraimo products from roadside vendors for two reasons:
1). You stand the risk of buying fake.
2). If you at all get the original, these vendors make ridiculous profits on top of your head.

Instead, just log on to their website Oraimo dot Ng, and search for the product you want. Select and input your number and email.

It takes three days to deliver and guess what? It's cash on delivery!

Those power banks you are buying at the market for ridiculous prices, you'd be surprised on how much cheap you could get them on their website.

I got this for 19k. Delivery fee was 1200.

SLOW DOWN AND BE PATIENT

1. If You Are Looking For Wealth, Somebody Is Looking For Health.

2. If You Are Looking For Health, Somebody Just Dièd.

3. If You are Looking For Power, Somebody Has Acquired And Used it And Is Now Powerless.

4. Each Time You Drive A Fancy Car, Somebody, Somewhere Is Dying In A Car Crash.

5. Each Time a New Mansion Springs From The Earth, A New Grave is Dug Below The Earth.

6. Each Time You Throw Away A Morsel, Somewhere, Somebody is Searching For a Morsel To Survive.

7. Each Time You Throw Food Into Dustbin, Someone Is Looking For Remnant To Eat.

8. Each Time You Ask God To Promote or Change Your Present Situation, Someone Is Praying to Get To Your Present Situation.

9. For Each Smile On The Planet, There's a Drop Of Tear In Another Place On The Planet.

10. For Each Celebration Of Childbirth, There Are Tears of Bùrial.

11. Each Time You Urinate Or Drink Water, Remember Someone Is Using Pipe For The Same Purpòse.

Always Be Thankful.

Think of Goodness of God in your life throughout!

May He Ease Our Affairs and Bless all our Efforts...

Nah omo ale e be

Seeing Nigerians fighting someone online for thinking an interview he granted, was what made The UK ban Nigerians from bringing dependents after getting visa, shows how ignorant you all are.

That's why I can never argue with a Nigerian. I just delete their comments and block.

You people don't read and that's why you come online to disgrace yourselves all the time.

I'm sure other countries will be reading your hot takes and be bowing their heads in shame.

Keep giving that young man fame that he doesn't deserve. Ndi Ara!

Lol. So, in you people's small minds. Your little minds. You think that boy is responsible for why the UK stopped giving visa to African immigrants?

You people are funny and yet to understand how the super powers work.

You think the United Kingdom doesn't or didn't know that Nigerians are using their masters or doctorate program as means to "japa"?

FYI, there's nothing, absolutely nothing these guys aren't aware of.

The reason they turn a blind eye is because of what I call a symbiotic relationship.

Nigerian immigrants think they are gaining from the UK, while as a matter of fact, the UK is gaining more from Nigerians.

Calculate how many thousands of Nigerians came in through that Visa program and how much they've had to pay.

Let's assume 200000 people. Multiply that number by the least average of 10000 pounds.

We are talking about 2 f*cking billion pounds!

When migrating, they bring in money into the system.

Now, these guys work and pay tax. Another added revenue to the government.

Their health and insurance plan too.

You think these guys are foolish?

The only reason they're revoking the visa application thing is because, they've gotten what they need and they don't need you again.

It's the same thing that happened in Canada.

At some point Canada threw open her arms, to immigrants. There was some crazy rush that period, if you remember.

The people who came in, contributed massively to Canada's growing work force. Then when they saw they were getting saturated, they stopped taking in new immigrants.

I keep telling you people. There's nothing these super powers are not aware of.

Take for example, they allow our corrupt politicians into their country to deposit stolen funds into their bank accounts.

They'll use that money to develop their economy. But try and withdraw it later nah. That's when you start hearing stories, that the money was stolen, therefore they're seizing it.

Same thing with Yahoo boys who think they're smart. You think these foreign agency don't know who you all are?

The only reason they're not interested is because nobody is going after you for 1000, 2000 dollars.

But immediately that money enters 6 figures, you automatically become on their radar. You'll be in Nigeria enjoying your "wealth", when Interpol will burst your door in Ogbomosho and you'll be wondering how.

These guys know everything!

So, stop giving one nonsense boy credit for nothing. The UK had made their decision since and he just decided to grow his social media fame with it.

Berrityga your mama

How To Know A Girl Who Is Doing Hookup.

1). If you steadily recognize the scenery of Transcorp Hilton, Abuja; Born Hotel, Awka; Presidential Hotel, Portharcourt and Eko Hotel, Lagos in the background of her pictures, nwanne she's a hookup girl.

2). If her status reads "That Girl God Is Helping", nwanne the help might be coming from your father.

3). If she posts pictures, but doesn't reply or react to comments on them, she's most likely into hookup

4). If she's always posting mirror selfies or videos on her stories, especially wearing white towels.

5). Once in a blue moon, she updates herself singing to Nathaniel Bassey or Moses Bliss (especially the Daddy Wey Dey Pamper Song),or shares NSPDD on her wall.

6). She never jokes with 5 Nights Of Glory.

7). She's in the ushering department of House On The Rock, Salvation Ministries or Christ Embassy.

. She knows or has been to every club in her city.

9). Their names usually begin with DFW on Instagram, have disabled at a certain number on their bio and follow Blessing CEO.

10). If she reads this post and frowns her face, then comes to attack me in the comment section.

More

Good evening to my iPhone lovers all over Nigeria.

I bring you a very sweet deal, you'll never find anywhere online!

Have you been looking for where to purchase a UK used iPhone, but the prices are giving you serious heart attacks?

Well, you don't have to worry no more, for I've come to rescue your pockets and make you be that iPhone uses on a very affordable budget.

Let me not bore you too much with plenty talks.

Available for sale are;

14 pro 256gb: 870k
14 128gb: 700kk
14 256gb: 730k
13 pro max 128gb: 710k
12 pro max 256gb: 575k
13 pro 512gb:680k
13 pro 256gb: 640k
13 256gb: 530k
12 pro 256gb: 510k
12 pro 128gb: 480k
12 256gb: 390k
12 128gb: 370k
12 64gb: 350k
13 256gb: 520k
13 128gb : 500k.

Before you think of haggling, I want you to do me a favour. Go to other online vendors and compare with the rates I'm giving you. If anything beats this by even half, don't bother to continue.

If you've checked and nothing does, I'm here to make your dreams of owning that iPhone come true.

Feel free to hit me up for your enquires and purchase too.

My WhatsApp number is 08103061506. You can also call me with that number.

Please note that, all waybills will be done through GIG logistics to ensure your phone reaches you sound and safely.

Even if you can't purchase from me, kindly help me share this post as my customers might be on your timeline.

Thank y'all.

Red Flags For Me.

1. If she’s razz.

2. When she’s too comfortable being in the midst of my gender.

3. When she has more male friends than females.

4. If she’s the kind of person that wants to be friends with the whole world.

5. When her voice is deep like Yul Edochie’s.

6. When she’s ob’sessed with Korean Drama.

7. If she has a male bestie.

8. When she dances like Poco Lee.

Important first date questions.

1. What happened to your last relationship?

2. Do you have a male bestie?

3. Is there any guy in your life you call Zaddy?

4. Hope there’s no one offended that I’m about to be in a relationship with you?

5. When you’re pissed off at someone, hope you don’t carry knife or buy acid?

6. Do you have a “Big Head” or “He Can Disturb For Africa” in your life?

7. Hope you won’t frustrate my life with billing? I’ll definitely chest some but you know i can’t k!ll myself.

8. Are you the type that’ll leave everything to me or are you a supportive partner?

9. Hope your ex won’t be a problem?

10. Is there anyone currently in your life that is dating you that you are not dating

I love you all

For those wey wan show me love
2211039747
Uba thanks

Big 22❤️🖤

I like how when it comes to the AMVCA awards, they always ignore Asabawood actors.

I mean, see the winners nah. Can you compare?

Destiny Etiko for one, would have shown up to the award, wearing one Catwoman swimsuit with her signature abortion belt to match, doing live videos in her Prado Jeep shouting;

"This is my sweat. I worked hard to get to where I am today."

Or imagine Zubby Michael receiving an award for the Best Agbero In A Movie, then he comes on stage to shout;

"Ke di ife neme si. Umu otu anokwa eba ehh."

Chizzy Alichi will now tell him to sit down, that he is too local.

Na so fight go start. Destiny will go live again to shout "it's my money, it's my sweat".