₦airaland Forum

Living larger than their sponsors….. chicken republic celebrities…. This is what they are doing in Cyprus instead of facing their education.
They said they cannot work because they are celebrities but they can show off with expensive drinks and attend parties.

I wish their new sponsor all the best…. Our society sometimes reward mïścreánts all in the name of sympathy.

Somebody said “But Cyprus no be country sha”

LMFAOOOOOOO.

First, there’s a big difference between Cyprus and Northern Cyprus. One is in the EU, one is not even recognized as a state by other countries.

Secondly, there is no metrics where Nigeria is a better country than an EU member state. Make we no dey cap.

They have a lesser unemployment rate than Nigeria.

No be the other day wey Airpeace help Nigerians evacuate from Sudan? Sudan oh. There are Nigerians studying in Kazakhstan and Bahrain.

Another person said Rivers state is even richer than Cyprus 😆😆. You go just know say that person never cross Choba bridge before 😆😆😆

There are women who don't feel pleasure the regular way.

They don't get fully aroused until they feel substantial pain.

For example, I know of this girl who doesn't get wet until you disfigure her nipples with you teeth.

She likes her nipples bitten hard.

Even me gets scared some times. Make I no go bite off onu ala for person future mother.

But she still screams harder when I'm not biting enough.

I know of another girl who only cums when you squeeze her tities like Agege bread.

Like, you've to squeeze the destiny out of boobs during nragbu before she nyuos.

I know of this one that has lost all her edges, because you have to pull her hair really hard before she enjoys nragbu. One time I pulled too hard, that one of her braids uprooted from her scalp. Girl didn't as much as flinch.

Point is, a lot of women are yet to understand their bodies and what works for them.

The reason why you might not enjoy nragbu is because you've not explored the option of pain.

And for the men, some of these girls are too shy or scared to tell you they like pain.

But trust me, every girl likes pain during nragbu. It just depends on level at which you inflict the pain.

So, unlike Tinubu, don't let her breathe.

Nigerians are very funny people.

They'll organize an event or occasion and send you an invite.

You'll deprive of yourself of sleep, comfort and cancel other engagements, just to be at that person's event.

You arrive, help put things in place, cheer them, dance, hype and support them depending on what the occasion was for.

Then, when this friend is giving a vote of thanks, they ignore the people who travelled kilometers to thank those who stayed at home to view your WhatsApp story.

Why? Because those people who stayed at home, offered monetary support.

I find it ridiculous, because money or not, anybody who can leave their house to turn up for you, shows they really value you in their life.

Those ones only sending money, do so, because they don't want to be there. You're not in the scale of importance to them. That's why they send money, so you won't come back to ask then why they didn't come.

Obviously, Nigerians don't understand that and that's why you'll hardly see me honour a someone's invite.

I'll rather remain in my house than go where I won't be appreciated.

Better still, I will show my support by viewing your WhatsApp.

What is the craziest thing you have done so a guest who has overstayed can leave?

When I was in Alakahia, one of my guys came to see me, he said he’ll spend just one night and go back to town. It was during ASUU strike so my roommates had gone home, I was the only one around school, womanizing.

One night became 3 nights. He kept promising to go the next day. 3 nights became one week. I couldn’t even womanise properly because he was always at home snoring whenever a woman came to the house. I started looking for an excuse to see whether he would leave.

I told him that I was going to Degema for a meeting and would be back the next day but baba said he’ll wait for me until I come back. So I told him where to drop the key if he was leaving in case.

I didn’t go to any meeting obviously so I went to another of my friend’s house to hide until the next day.

I got home the next morning and saw that this guy had already boiled my last rice and sardine and was sleeping.

That morning was a Saturday so I told him I was going to town hoping that he’ll say he was going but baba wanted to see me off to the junction until I got a vehicle.

So I entered a cab going to Rumuokoro but came down at Assemblies junction and walked to another of my friend’s house and stayed until evening. I called my neighbors occasionally to check if he was still around and they even said he was with a woman.

My friend that I was with asked me what was going on and I told him and he laughed and told me to leave the matter to him, that I should go home and wait that the guy would leave that night.

I got home and baba was even gisting me how he gave my last juice to the babe that came to fornicate with him while I was in town. E no know say I dey vex for am.

By the time we were about to sleep by like 10pm, we heard a knock on the door and two hefty boys smelling of weed entered my room with machete and pushed my guy inside.

They said they were looking for “Sister Patricia, the bagger that slept with their guy’s babe”. We said we didn’t know who sister Patricia was and they said that they will be back by midnight and if we don’t provide Sister Patricia by then, they will kill us. They left and my guy began to pack his bags immediately. I also packed a bag and my guy and I got to Alakahia junction that night. He hugged me and took a cab going to Choba.

Immediately his cab left, I burst out laughing and laughed to myself until I got back to my room. I tried calling my friend to tell him that the plan had worked, his number wasn’t going through so I called one of my babes to come over and she did.

Freedom at last! We were lying down naked when she asked of my guy that was with me and I gave her gist of how I arranged with my friend to scare him to leave. Immediately she heard the name “Sister Patricia” she paused and got up, apparently startled and began to dress up.

I asked her what happened and she said that she was indeed dating a cult boy and she saved my name as Sister Patricia on her phone so he won’t suspect her.

Lmaooo. I don die.

Wait, so you mean...

At that moment, the boys came back and started knocking on the door.

“Patricia, we don come again oh”

I looked at this babe. So a whole Port Harcourt boy like me, I came to this world as a man but I will die as a woman named Sister Patricia...

Kai

Please do not take Tinubu student loan to go and study Religious and Cultural Studies. Please.

Unpopular Opinion.

Of recent, Don Jazzy is not managing his signees well.

He has a number of fantastic artists, but most of them sing nonsense!

Look at Boy Spyce for example.

"Acrobatic, aromatic, systematic..."

What the hell is that?!

Just when I thought I had heard enough, dude comes out in a feature to sing something lamer.

"Carry me go where I no know, burst by bololo".

You spent months grooming your signees, only for them to release music that sounds like they recorded it under the influence of inferior alcohol, "shersee".

Look at Bayanna. You give her tatata, really? That's supposed to be a song?

I used to be so much in love with Arya Star.

Her Samaritan song was world class! Everybody around the world vibed to it.

Then, she released Rush. I was like, this is not Arya's style, but maybe, just maybe. I mean, her voice was everything, but you could tell it wasn't her singing.

All of a sudden, Don Jazzy turned my posh Arya Star into a full fledged agbero and got her screaming, "I go make you no dada, music sweet pass Amala Ketu".

I just lost hope after that.

I don't even want to talk about Rema.

This set of signees are the worst so far, not because they are not good artists, but because it seems Don Jazzy has given into the pressure of Nigerian mainstream media where "nonsense" sells.

But he should understand that songs like Amala Ketu can only reign for a short while and the song will be forgotten sooner than it reigned.

The person that lied to Nigerians that driving with AC uses more fuel will never make heaven.

Your car actually uses more fuel when all the windows are wound down than with the AC on.

You know the more annoying thing with 33+ Igbo men?

They technically don't even wait for you to give them an answer if they tell you their plans to marry you.

These people that God will help me to punish, will go straight to the girl's parents and let them know the intentions they have for their daughter, without the girl even knowing!

And of course, they will go and see your parents bearing gifts like bag of rice, tomato pastes, tubers of yams, Chasis, George, Hollandis, refined kai like ST Remy for your greedy father, one gallon of fuel and a fat envelope.

The man won't even inform the girl that he's visiting her parents ooo!

That evening, the girl will get a call from her greedy mother;

"Why didn't you inform us that your husband was coming, we'd have prepared something delicious."

You the girl would be wondering who, until they tell you it's one Emeka like that.

You'll go and confront Emeka. You tell him you've a serious relationship.

And that's where he takes it a bit farther.

Emeka goes back to your father's house with an engineer to take quotations for completing the roofing.

You either marry Emeka that coming Saturday or your parents will fight his battle on his behalf.

God will punish all you 33+!

Dear 33+ Igbo Men.

You people should stop this madness of picking any random girl you see and marrying her within a short time.

Any girl that enter your eye, you don't care if she is in a relationship or not, you just propose marriage and give her an ultimatum of two weeks to accept.

I know you have the money and resources to, but God will punish you.

Relationship someone has been building from scratch, you wait until it's time to roof it before you strike.

And you think God will not punish you?

When they give you another man's child, you come out to start ranting. You really think she won't be going back to her true love to collect one for the road?

Dey play.

Women When A Strange Man Texts Them For The First Time:

Man: Hi Angel.

Woman: Who is this?

Man: My name is Daniel.

Woman: Which Daniel and how did you get my number?

Man: We met at the mall sometime last week.

Woman: I can't remember giving my number to anyone at the mall. Can you send me your pictures let me see?

Man: (Sends Picture).

Woman: I can't remember you.

Man: Okay. Can we see? I'm lodged at Bell's Hotel.

Woman: I should come and see someone I don't know? Please, don't text me again.

*******

Men When A Strange Woman Texts Them.

Woman: Hi Cutie.

Man: Baby Girl.

Woman: This is Cynthia.

Man: How are you Cynthia?

Woman: I'm fine. Just a little bored.

Man: Can I see your pictures?

Woman: (Sends him one wearing ashawo gown).

Man: Hmmmm. Beautiful. Since you're bored would you like to chill with me?

Woman: Yes. Where do you stay?

Man: (sends her his
house address).

********

And yet we wonder why women live longer than men.

Unless a man is taking you to an actual restaurant where you know that meals are generally expensive, I don't see any reason why a woman would go out to an eatery or mama put on a date, and her bill alone would be 12k.

Some of una dey mad oo!

Like, don't you have conscience?!

What are you eating that will amount to 12000 naira at Mr Biggs or Mama Put?

You people are just gluttons!

First of, it's a date where you get to know each other, not an avenue for breaking the Guinness Book of record for glutonny.

Second, you should be considerate when making an order you know might be on the high side.

It's courtesy to ask.

"Can I get this?"

"I'd like some extras, can I?"

That's how it should be!

Or better still, you pay for other extra stuff with your own money.

Umu Nwanyi, stop being wicked and heartless!

It's a date for crying out loud! You're there to get to know him, not to exhibit your glutonny!

Scabies

Dear Kings.

We are in the age of consent.

Rape is a disgusting thing. No one is too Hot to choose rape instead of self control. Once she says no, stop. No means no.

Don’t even beg. Don’t insist. If she says No, don’t try to convince her. Don’t ask just to put the tip. Tip of what

If she allows you to touch her breasts, it doesn’t mean she has allowed you to remove her pant. If she allows you to remove her pant or even removes it by herself, it doesn’t mean that she has allowed you to put preek.

The fact that both of you are now having sex doesn’t mean that if she says stop because of a pain she’s feeling that you cannot stop. Even in the heat of the moment, always reaffirm that she wants it.

The fact that she agreed to come to your house isn’t an affirmation that she wants to sleep with you, maybe she just trusts you.

If you behave yourself and don’t touch her and she goes home and says that you’re not a man because you didn’t insist after she said no, it’s fine my brothers. Such women are dangerous and any woman who isn’t smart enough to open her own mouth to agree to sex should be totally avoided.

When a woman wants to have sex with you, you won’t even bother with too much signals. You’ll know because an adult woman knows how to ask and agree to a man for sex and no, what she’s wearing isn’t an indication of consent. Even if she’s half naked, her choice of clothes isn’t permission for you to touch her.

If she dressed to seduce you, she will go ahead and seduce you with her hands. If you are struggling with her to take off her clothes because she doesn’t want them taken off then it’s pretty obvious she did not dress to seduce you.

If you are not seduced by a mad naked woman on the streets, then what a woman is wearing to your house shouldn’t concern you.

Dear Kings, we must learn responsibility. We have sisters and daughters and if we continue to teach each other and our sons responsibility and discipline, just maybe our young daughters and sisters will grow up in safer societies.

Don’t RAPE. No means No.

Please share for other Kings to see.

According to Harvard University below are the most difficult courses in the world.
What position is yours
Mine is 1st

Penalty Bleep

Man u will still be man u

Dem go de do gragra

Goallllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll

Freelancerr:
She's for the street

How to know?

80% of girls are into hook up codedly but won't show it.
So if you have a girl you suspect she's into hook up, I would advice you become careful with her before she pin another man pregnancy on you.

Tho, what I do to a girl I'm dating is I clone there chat mostly WhatsApp.

Once it's cloned I check and read all their message directly on my phone even without them noticing.

I do this for some months so as to be sure of whom I'm dating, make I for no go enter one chance.

I'll teach anyone this trick only if you check my signature and text me on WhatsApp.

Note : you will pay a token before we start. Cos it's not free oooo.

I sabi am boss

No be today

My babe de send nudes to her cousin

Thank God for that app ..I no go cast the update

Sad ...
I got these messages below from a lady who has been reading my stories , tried reaching her but haven't gotten a response from her yet .

Please is better if you don't have an idea , that it's understandable but please sweethearts if you know , remove your footwear and run like you are been chased by a wild animal.

Don't let no man decieve you that he loves you and will go extra miles , don't take those words seriously, because when it gets tough they'll flee and allow you to bear the burden alone , it's not easy sometimes I'm forced to go offline because of the cries of people with problems that I can barely do anything about it, having a sick child at home is a heavy load to carry , God bless all Mother's those people are a gift to this world.

An those of you putting pressure on people to get married, wait till what's is coming for you hits you .

Parents pushing their children into marriage for selfish motives, remember if anything to happen to him or her you played a part in it and remember no matter what you do on this earth good or bad there's a price for it and we must pay .

Always remember this " Love isn't enough for the pains these kids go through biko nwanyị mebere"

It's my sincere prayers that God take away the pains on these poor children and grant them good health.

Mothers you are blessed, Your reward is heaven .

God will help us all...
Ebenezer our only helper will help us all ...
Because..
He was God...
He is God...
He will always be God...
When there's a man to pray, there's a God to answer...
Or
I'm telling a tale?

Tips On How To Improve Your Nragbu Performance.

First off, the reason why many couples experience abysmal performance when it comes to nragbu, is the anxiety.

You are thinking;

What if I disappoint? What if my p*ssy is smelling? What if I go flaccid? What if I buss faster than a cockrell?

Relax. All these thoughts are valid.

To reduce them, I recommend a glass or two of wine.

Moderate Alcohol not only helps to improve your performance and increase your libido, it also reduces your anxiety level.

I recommend Four Cousins for the job.

Also, for the men, don't always jump into nragbu. Try to talk to your first time partner before you finally decide to meet.

Ask her what she likes, how she likes it and also bring up dirty conversations. So, that way, her mind is already anticipating in advance.

This helps to reduce the tension and get the juices flowing.

I also cannot overemphasize the importance of pre-intimacy.

Women prefer pre-intimacy to the main deal. There's how you'll use your fingers or tongue on her, she'll forget you have a p*enis.

If you're a two minutes man, make up for your shortcomings, by knowing how to use your fingers. If you can make her cum repeatedly with your mouth or fingers, she would be too tired to think of how many minutes you lasted.

As for the women, please, express yourself during nragbu. Tell him how you want it. Scream when he's hitting the right spot. If you want it harder, tell him! Stop being shy or scared of being judged.

You both are fornicatiors, so you might as well enjoy it to the fullest, 'cus the trumpet might sound while you're at it.

This

Here

More

This

Cyprivit or something like that

Truthsoldier:
E bad?
Tell me the thing nah

try some multivitamins capsules I've forgotten the name sha...

Truthsoldier:
Please nairalanders is there any food,pills or things that can make one gain weight in a space of one to three months?

you wan de fat for APC regime

etrange:
The one you saw online is basmati, I believe.

yes