₦airaland Forum

eezeebone
my man whats cracking,I see you are just enetering folks out here

Poster
What is the N1000 for if i may ask,Discussion fee or something

Hillarious

Ahh!!!!

bossy

no

Im shocked and suprised at the way some nairalanders reaction to this topic,Smoking is nothing more than a mere habit.what you should be intrested in is how to get the person to stop smoking

I am homophobic and its not even there.

Yes i agree with you that girls are car freeks.I have once seen a scenario where a girl left a guy using a baby benz for a guy using a V-boot and wouldn't put anything else into consideration.

So i see you dont like to get down on the first night

The staff at a local United Way office realized that it had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer.

The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute.

"Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000, you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the community in some way?"

The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and replied, "First, did your
research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness, and has
medical bills that are several times her annual income?"

Embarrassed, the United Way representative mumbled, "Um, No."

"Or," the lawyer continued, "that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?"

The stricken United Way representative began to stammer out an apology but was interrupted when the lawyer added,

"Or that my sister's husband died in a traffic accident?" the lawyer's voice rising in indignation, "Leaving her penniless with three children?"

The humiliated United Way representative, completely beaten, said
simply, "I had no idea, "

On a roll, the lawyer cut him off once again, "So if I don't give any money to them , why should I give any to you ?"

Why is the car so expensive,can it fly?

I no see oh

You dey craze-Idiot

I plan on toasting a babe

@Thuglife
I aint no judge but i want to let you know that what you wrote as where you live is mere blasphemy and sheer ignorance

Chelsea haters shey una don see abi

Omega25red

Your reply is 100% GBA BE

hell no

Thanks guys

hi everyone,
I'm so delighted today because i just qualified as a chattered accountant

Some questions that needs answers.

1. If FedEx and UPS were to merge, would they call it - FedUP?

2. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

3. If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

4. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

5. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

6. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

7. If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible?

8. Why is it that a house is called building when it is already built?

9. If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?

10. If you're not supposed to drink and drive, then why do bars have parking lots?

11. If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?

12. If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?? Human??

Men guy,
Abi craze don dey worry you,thats the kind of girl ive been looking for all my life.Someone that when i say sit she sits,stand she stands,shit she shits etc.Guy dont hurt an innocent girl oh.

HALF DOZEN
Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets. "We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the counter. "You don't?" I replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the r eply. "So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?" "That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets

HOW MUCH
I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those "dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the "divider", looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said to me, "Do you know how much this is?" I said to her "I've changed my mind, I don't think I'll buy that today." She said "OK," and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.

ON LINE SHOPPING
A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."

BATTERIES
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just this remote thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk."

COPIES
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.

kill yourself

I dont blame your friend especially since all this Lag girls are not real.Beign a prostitute does not necessarily mean standing on the road.Most Lag girls keep numerous boyfriends in order to meet up with their demands.THAT SEEMS LIKE PROSTITUTION TO ME AND ILL SAY IT THAT MOST LAG GIRLS ARE PROSTITUTES.

How did i get myself so messed up in love.I deserve it sha.I cant stop thinking of her,Her thought keeps hunting me.its affecting my work,my madam in the office even complained about my recent lack of concentration in the office.I've tried everything possible to forget her,music,alcohol,clubbing,friends etc but to no avail.I'm also sorry to all the guys i chanced off their girlfriends.I guess mine is the worse.Please is there anyone who has gotten over a heartbreak b4 to help me out cuz my mind is playing tricks on me.

@outlaw
Na wa for you oh

I no envy you oh.This is more than a peculiar case.Wish you luck.ZOOMS OFF

abeg i fit join una?I served for Ekiti,na better place.