₦airaland Forum

Remember d orphanage homes if U'v gt lots of pounds, man.

Finally we r free 2 comment on GARRI as much as we cn nd nvr gt banned. Besyds, hw does d hike in d price of garri affect d already hiked garri price in d mkt?
Teamgarri.

Finally we r free 2 comment on GARRI as much as we cn nd nvr gt banned. Besyds, hw does d hike in d price of garri affect d already hiked garri price in d mkt?
Teamgarri.

AmD'banj, Oskibanj lyk my jamaican frnd kal me, Importer, exporter kokowater.
I'l forever b ur biiiig pal. Bt sooo sad i dnt gt a retweet frm ya.

Wetin cm consign me wit ds yeye news whn I jst sent my gal 2 buy me a cup of "G" tins. Na im b my consign bt dm don increase d price again.

Gud, 9ja layrs r nominated bt I honestly dnt c any 1 of dm mkn it 2 d last 10. Mikel n Utaka 2 me r surprise inclusions. Mikel only improved in hs disciplinary record only. Kps backpassin n lacks attackin skills n hates scorin goals. Utaka did well wf Montpellier last season bt u guys wl agree wf me dt he's way past hs prime. Moses is a 9ce player no doubt bt he may av d chance 2 win it in d future only if he kps playin on ds level or evn improve.
All in all, I c Y.Toure winnin it.
"teamchelsea"
NB. "no hating plz"

1. Anytym i meet an intelligent gal.
2. Anytym i read hr txts.
3. Anytym i c a female youth corper.
4. Anytym i feel lonely, bored, sad or hd a bad day.
5. Anytym i c ppl 2rly in luv n r dsplayin it most espcly in public.
6. Anytym i wanna kiss soo passionately.
Hr name is Chinenye Mbah. I luv hr ooo much bt its sooo sad we broke up. I stl luv hr n I pray she cms bk 2 me.

He is 21. Unarguably, d youngest dad in 9ja and nairaland. "Lol".
Bt, plzzzz ooooo, whr r d garri team?

Manager

engli - Igbo. A loovuru m gi.

seedord247: If they banned shorthand typing, idowu will be scarces on nairaland because typing real english is her family problem.

oooooh, u jst md a mistake.
Do u mean "scarce" or "scarces". Lolz.

Sirwyte: nickname 4 a fyn, handsome, cute, fair complexioned, baaaad shaaaarrrp nigga.

Dfrnt topic wf a dfrnt story.

I dey count my moni o 4 ATM oooo, bt no b mk i sure say my moni dey cmplete bt 2 knw wthr d machine go pay me pass wetin i typ.
Bsyds sef, i no go fit rmbr d last tym i visitd d atm machine stand sef.

lilkech: We all know that armed bandits have been laying ambush for unsuspecting motorists and travelers on our highways especially on the lonely stretch of road between the Benin by-pass and the town of Benin itself. I don't think our police force can help out at this particular area of the highway so we need to be prepared for the worst.

They manage to stop vehicles and buses by either throwing objects onto the road directly in the path of your vehicle, pretending to be servicing a broken down vehicle or they just COME OUT GUNS DRAWN AND DANGEROUSLY POINTING IT AT YOUR VEHICLE or worse still BLAZE AT YOU.

If you are ever unfortunate enough to be stopped by those highway robbers, please take special heed to the advice I wish to give on this thread.

STEP 1

Once you notice the robbers trying to pull your vehicle over, just 'FLOOR IT', unless of course they have their guns already pointed directly at you from afar. In this case 'JUST STOP YOUR VEHICLE' because you wouldn't want to test if their weapons are loaded, or do you? I seriously hope not.

STEP 2

If your vehicle gets pulled over, do not make the mistake of trying to fight your way out of the situation because of the likely consequence (see step 1 above)

STEP 3

Normally at this stage the bandits will commence to quickly search you and the full vehicle for plunder able valuables. If you are in a commuter bus, then the bandits will force the doors open and coerce the passengers to RUN INTO THE BUSH adjacent the lane you were pulled over on (to the right). I prefer to run into the bush also but ON THE OPPOSITE LANE OF THE HIGHWAY or ON THE HIGHWAY ITSELF AWAY FROM THE VEHICLE (if the chance presents itself). If you were robbed on the road itself then forget about the next steps and GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE FAST.

IN THE NEXT STEPS IT IS ASSUMED THAT YOU ARE TRAVELLING ALONE. THIS IS BECAUSE YOU ARE ACTUALLY ON YOUR OWN AT THIS POINT, FORGET 'CROWD MENTALITY' AND USE YOUR BRAIN FROM HERE ON

STEP 4

Once the bandits demand that you run into the bush you can either choose to crouch and whimper in the bus (feint hearted) or dash out from the bus. Please remember to leave your traveling bags and heavy stuff in the bus before leaving it (no matter what you've got in it) as carrying them will slow you down and automatically turn you into a target for the bandits to single out. If you remained in the bus then just sit tight and await the return of the other members of your vehicle from the bush.

NOW IT GETS REALLY SERIOUS AND TRICKY FROM HERE

STEP 5

Once you are out of the bus and dashing into the jungle please DO NOT RUN TOGETHER WITH/ IN THE SAME DIRECTION WITH YOUR CO-PASSENGERS as the crowd mentality will cloud your judgment. You should under no circumstance run MORE THAT A FEW METERS INTO THE BUSH before falling on the ground and LAYING THERE FOR NO MORE THAN 10 MINUTES before getting up and slowly make your way back to the road in another direction from which either you or your co-passengers came into the bush. This is because the bandits will waste no time in plundering the bus/car and then taking off into the same bush themselves.

If you run too far into the bush YOU WILL DEFINITELY ENCOUNTER THE REST OF YOUR CO-PASSENGERS AS WELL AS THE MAIN GANG OF BANDITS (did you really think that the 3 or 4 guys that stopped your vehicle were all the members of the gang? Well, think again) plus you also run the risk of getting lost and losing your handy belongings (phones, wallets, purses e.t.c) in the confusing jungle marathon race that you and others would have participated in.

BUT IF YOU DID RUN DEEP INTO THE JUNGLE OUT OF FEAR, THEN READ ON.

STEP 6

Band together with other members of your vehicle and then coordinate within yourselves to present the bandits with the valuables you can afford to lose (yes, because the robbers MUST find you) and try to find a safe and traceable place to hide the items that you consider of high value to you. Remember to keep little cash for your transport fare aside just in case but remember that YOU MUST PRESENT THE ROBBERS WITH SOMETHING(S) OF TANGIBLE INTEREST TO BE CONSIDERED 'SAFE' AT THIS POINT. Failure to do so might cause the bandits to inflict injuries on you or worse still cost you your life.

Once and after you have been robbed just immediately proceed to make your way back to your vehicle which must still be parked on the highway itself (unless of course your driver has left you behind), THANK THE LORD YOUR GOD and continue with your journey.

Have a nice travel experience and safe journey.

ds 1 na just grammar.
armed robbers nvr jam u 4 road.

Happy graduation. Snoop lion.
Xpktin yet anothr graduation 2 mayb snoop monkey.
WEED NO GUD OOO.

manny4life: Well I wish him goodluck to him... I still have courtesy to tell a failure like him, HPD

I knw say dt 51 na hm futbol abi politrickal age. Lol.

manny4life: Well I wish him goodluck to him... I still have courtesy to tell a failure like him, HPD

I knw say dt 51 na hm futbol abi politrickal age. Lol.

sexkillz: [color=#000030]At first sight, the worst you can be is attracted to the person. You do not know his/her qualities. You "fall in love" or "get attracted" with/to them at first sight and as time progresses that "love" transcends from the attraction stage, past the infatuation stage and into the stage you "love" the person for who they really are and not that first image that was impressed on your mind.

A lot of people find it difficult to differentiate when the love they have for an individual is based on attraction, lust or infatuation, so they just term such feelings as love. And that is why a guy sees a lady for the first time and says "I love you". That is absolutely absurd and a complete misuse of words. In that first case, "I am attracted to you" would have sufficed.

I believe in "attraction" at first sight or "fallen in love" at first sight, but not " I love you" at first sight. . .
[/color]

U JUST SAID D TRUTH, D WHOLE TRUTH AND NOTHING BUT D TRUTH.

I wondr whethr TB na God.

E b lyk say u carry ur grudge entr ds room. Gerawt jooor. We dnt need dudes lyk u hr

Another story. Super story. I'm off.

The bible says dt "He hu finds a wife, finds a gud thn". 4 me, as long as we luv each othr n feel compartibl, i wldnt mind crawlin 2 propose 2 hr. Shikinah.

Wn i ws a kid, i used 2 thnk dt any man dt is nt rich ws nvr a hrdwrkin man bt wn i gt oldr, lolz""".
I used 2 thnk dt med docs dnt fall sick.
I used 2 thnk then dt d flat we whr livin in ws owned by my dad.

lyk u pikd doz words outa my mouth. we all knw dt women gt more oldr lukin thn men evn wn d man is older in age. so y shld i marry an oldr woman?

poor Harry. 1 of ma favourite managers in d epl. all d best 4 hm.