ahnie:


Omote please z bell pepper same as our regular red pepper?

Help clear my ignorance!

Bell pepper is the green one in fried rice and the red one Yoruba’s call tatashe. That we blend with tomatoes and scotch bonnet to make stew

Whew na wa oh.

At first I was like nice thread.
Then you now tell people not to buy already mixed black soap and then post nonsense unsafe recipe.

Don’t mix soap that isn’t properly preserved with egg and milk, that’s just terrible .

And there is a science behind formulating. If you want to DIY learn from people who know.

Homemade burger. I made the burger buns too

ahnie:


Recipe pulezz.

Buttermilk biscuits
3 cups flour
2 tablespoons sugar
4 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon baking soda
3/4 cup cold butter, cut into chunks
1 cup buttermilk

Mix dry ingredients in a bowl (flour, sugar, baking powder,salt and soda) and whisk

Add cold butter, and use your hand to mix it till the flour looks crumbly or coarse then add buttermilk and mix, till it forms a dough. Don’t mix for long. Just enough to incorporate the dry ingredients and liquid.

Pour a bit of floor on a flat surface, place the dough and flatten but not too flat it needs to be thick like 2 inches thick each

Use a biscuit cutter or big size tomato can for each biscuit. Don’t twist the cutter or can when cutting the biscuit. If you twist it it won’t rise well. And place on baking pan

Preheat oven. Make sure oven is hot before putting pan in the oven and bake for 10-12 minutes.

If you don’t have buttermilk you can substitute with liquid milk like peak milk but reduce the baking powder and use only 2 Tbs spoon and no baking soda

Buttermilk biscuits

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Lukgaf:
Mukina2, Sissie, lalasticlala and all Muslims in Nairaland. Ramadan Kareem

Ramadan Mubarak

Empiree:
you can't believe I was losing my front hair for yrs now due to stress, not hereditary. I started chewing carrots everyday and also apply carrot oil as well. My hair is full now. Although I do use sulfate free shampoo and conditioner once in a while as well.

That's great. Carrot is great for the body. Also apply the carrot oil on your skin and thank me later.

Empiree:
Resurfaced, hun

I heard of carrot oil is doing great job too. And eating carrot as well most of the time.

Yes oh. Resurfaced.

Carrot seed oil is one of my personal favorite oils. Carrot oil is great

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nurshah:



You attacked your own brother publicly opening doors to ridicule over him go and think that's all I will ever say to you.. I refuse to stoop to the level of engaging you in words

And you are “attacking” your sister “privately “?

You have been noticed. Now run along.

nurshah:



Be careful and work on your manners, only Allah knows the heart of man.. If TRULLY we are to conclude then I can say you lack manners
If truly u want to correct, y not pm him? You dare to want to correct home you need more correction

Sister, respect your self

Am guessing you have manners?? Lol you should have taken your advice and pm me to correct me on my lack of manners na.

Brother/sister respect yourself.

DevdanSanguine:


And what kind of mosque are you going to where men and women are allowed to mingle such that you can see and take notice of what they are wearing? Even though they are responsible for what they allow you to see do you not know that you are supposed to lower your gaze? And in a mosque? What kind of mosque allows Muslims to dress the way you claim and even pray?

It'd be funny if it weren't so sad. The fact that you blame everyone but yourself for your own weakness. Lower your gaze the Quran said, not go about trying to figure out whether women are wearing panties or not.

True.

What kind of mosque was it that he could observe clearly what they were wearing and even knew what they wore before and during camp.

@empiree @sino I wonder why you people bother to argue with him, because one can’t even have an intellectual conversation with him. It’s one thing to discuss with an intellectual atheist about religion, but this one ehn....

You guys are trying oh.

tintingz:
May Flying spaghetti monster have mercy on you and guide you.

Emipree, sino, Albaqir, sissie, Rashduct4luv, imam tbaba1234. is this how your fellow Muslim behave cursing and threats of an imaginary place using the Quran because the debate is diminishing your faiths. .

This dude can't stand to tolerate logic, he took it emotional.

Who’s faith is diminishing, keep my name out.
You do not have the capacity to diminish my faith, you can continue with your illusions all you want, but don’t mention me. Take this seriously.

Like I told you earlier, your brain capacity is average at best, and I can’t be bothered having a discussion with you. I didn’t see you as a smart person even before you became an atheist, when you used to post in Islam, romance and family section. You are definitely not smarter now. Yeah yeah lots of people told you, you aren’t smart, and now you will try to come up with something smart to say as your reply, don’t bother it makes no difference.

So now that you are an atheist, reading all the stuffs some atheist posted on the internet and using that as your justification still shows you are not the brightest. Ordinary nigerian map sef you went to bring up one nonsense on the Internet

I have seen atheists who could atleast put up a decent argument. But you ehn.

I wonder what your IQ is, you should do an iq test and post your results so we

Rashduct4luv:

.
Exactly, Sissie should beware of this OP.

I can only hide or ban him when he breaks a rule. Can’t ban him for being less than smart, or for having extreme views.

I am quite aware of him.

personal59:



am still saying it Seun needs to change the Islam page mods

same way he push a highly controversial post out last week

mod please what's ur intention?

Do you know that mods can’t push to front-page, only supermods can. So before requesting for them to be removed, know how it works.

nurshah:
Assalamu alaykum dear sisters and brothers,

Iam in need of good recommendations ..some are just expensive no quality .if I were in Lagos, kwara,Kaduna or kano I won't even be this worried.. Imagine paying so much and your kid isnt taught well..

Kindly assist me

Where In Abuja? There are lots of good schools with very high standard. And how much is so much? Expensive is a relative term.

9geria:
BismiLLAH, AlhamduliLLAH

SHE CALLED HER, "SELFISH FIRST WIFE" !!!

●How exactly did we expect the first wives, who are also Muslim sisters to live when all we do is to call their pain "unreal" when all we do is to forsake them while the only thing they truly need is understanding, a shoulder to cry on, someone to tell them, "take heart, sorry, after hardship surely comes relief, don't worry ALLAH will relieve you of this stress and pain."

Aren't we senior hypocrites if we pretend to care so much about the Muslim Ummah yet we only allow ourselves to see the pain of the single lonely sisters, the poor widows and divorcees but the pain and hardships of the first wives is invalid, according to us, it shouldn't even exist, in fact the first wives must be mad to experience that.

Imagine a first wife crying extremely profusely to me and asking me to recommend a dua'a that can heal her pain. She said she believes that there is no hardships that ALLAH cannot bring an end to, she laments that she only needs *comfort* and an end to her pain. So I recommend the dua'a of prophet Ayub to her.

So how come the hurt of these women does not count, how come? You throw a Muslimah into an endless bout of hardship because you seek to end the misery of a Muslimah, yet the Muslimah you threw into an endless bout of hardship shouldn't feel that hardship somehow, abi?

I have seen a woman who sought divorce from her husband after he took a second wife, then she went ahead to be a second wife *immediately.* That looked like madness to me, so I asked why?

She said; Ever since her husband took a second wife her life has lost happiness and the happiness was replaced by extreme and excessive unbearable hurt and pain.

She continued by saying: "Did you know what worsens this? My former husband's second wife called me a transgressor when she caught me crying and lamenting due to my difficulty in polygyny. All the people I ever know said to me: 'Your difficulties are signs of weakness in faith, how could you be in pain! It is not permissible to be in pain!' I wondered what they are all talking about it was only my Mum that said 'I know this is difficult, May ALLAH grant you ease' those simple words are a great deal of comfort to me, ALLAH used those words to save me from an impending mental health break down, everyone kept informing me of how selfish I am for not wanting happiness for my sister in Islam.

By ALLAH my pain and hardships in polygyny is nothing compared to the pain and hardships of the cruel words coming out from the mouth of everyone that I seek human comfort from, it was like a knife is been used to stab an open wound, definitely that is more painful than the initial wound.

*No one*, I mean absolutely no one cared for me, they kept on breaking me down more and more with every opportunity they get.

My former husband is the worst human being I ever know, he would call me a disbeliever and a selfish woman while I cry. He would say, I should want for my sister what I want for myself. What confuses me is that I heard that Sheikh Salih Al Fawzaan said in one of his tape that, "the difficulty and hardships of women in polygyny is only natural and it is not a sign of depletion in Imaan"

By ALLAH, I only need comfort from my husband, he describes the pain of my lonely cowife to me and he said I am a devil for feeling pain because he has helped a poor lonely sister. I looked around me and I found out that the only person people cared about is the poor lonely sister. I see my cowife enjoying the bliss of marriage while I am condemned to sadnesss that will probably never end, and I am just 36 years of age. I just wondered, will I remain sad for the remaining of the decades that remains for me in life? I am desperate to feel loved, and be cared for.

One morning I just woke up to find my neighbor whose husband got a second wife complaining about how difficult her life is in polygyny. I tried to convince my husband that my pain is not selfishness and it is valid because I heard my neighbor describing the exact same thing that I have been going through.

Interestingly, my husband said "stupid ungrateful first wives depressing each other, RUBBISH!!!" For a seconds I almost started crying again but all of a sudden I picked myself up and his statement made sense to me, that was when I realized that being a first wife is a curse and I demanded for divorce immediately and I was granted I was so happy when he didn't even try to revoke the divorce.

I think he was shocked to see that I demanded for divorce and he doesn't want to bruise his male ego by convincing me to stay. Whatever his reasons were to grant me the divorce with so much ease I don't even care, all that matters to me is to also be pampered and cared for and that is why I insist that being a second wife is the only reason I will be cared for in this world hence I pursued my dream.

Immediately I got out of the marriage I started stopping by every Masjid and groups of Muslims I could find, I started telling them that I am available to be a second wife. Before I know it, the influx of attention I got made me angry at myself for choosing to be a first wife in the first place. I was so much enjoying myself, with the multiple interest shown in me. I don't even care about the first wife of the men that are flocking around me. As much as I am concerned I am not the one that cursed them to be a first wife. In fact I made my choice with no rushing at all. And to be honest I don't care about what anyone have to say because as you can see I am now enjoying my life."

And that was the story of a first wife turned second wife. I however asked her what about the kids? She said "I fought with reckless abandon to gain their custody, and I gained it. I don't care about anyone anymore, my life as a first wife taught me to *only* care about myself because no one else will care for me"

I asked, how did you manage to see a man to marry you with kids? She replied; "I took them to my Mum, my Mum love my kids and my Mum has been lonely since my Dad's death, so that arrangement worked out great for everyone"

By ALLAH beneath all those rugged exterior I can sense a bitter woman. A woman that has been transformed from a gentle innocent soul to a difficult human being that only cares for herself even if that means destroying other people's lives.

She laughed an evil laugh when I asked her, is she not truly selfish now? She said, "you know what? If people call me selfish now, I will gladly answer. It hurts to be accused of selfishness when I am honestly just hurting and I need comfort. It is like accusing a good person of theft, the sorrow from wrong accusations can lead to an early grave. But if you call a thief, a thief, it makes no difference. Call me selfish now and it makes no difference because I am unapologetically selfish now. I only look after my own happiness nowadays."

The last question, I asked is that; "don't you think that it will be better to divorce and look after your kids, why do you think it is a must to marry again before you will be happy?"

She said "Will my kids kiss and cuddle me?"

So I just kept quiet.

________________________

While I do not agree with her belief that being a first wife is a curse and her choice to be selfish, I however understand the depth of her pain.

My point exactly is that there are alot of problems going on in our society today because we choose to insist that a natural difficulty must not exist.

Anyone who has read my article titled "The nature of polygyny" will understand me more. Does the fact ALLAH permits circumcision and child birth makes them less painful? Polygyny is permissible in Islam but it comes with it difficulties.

Women who give birth with no difficulty whatsoever are the exceptions to the norm, not the norm. And as such we should not judge women who experience difficulties in polygyny because there are some women who do not experience any form of hardship in polygyny, these women are the exceptions to the norm but they are not the norm.

We should learn to admit the validity of the pain of the first wives by learning from the story of a sister who narrated that; for first three years in polygyny she was always in and out of the offices of mental health specialist because of the excessive trauma she is going through. She said her husband is her pillar of strength, her supporter, her comforter and her sabaab for complete healing.

She said she admired the commitment of her husband, because while he was trying to ensure that she gets better, he was also giving the second wife her rights.

She has been in polygyny for 11 years, the first three years were very rough but outside that she has been enjoying a blissful marriage after those first three years of hardship, she said she thought she will never get better but she did get better.

I met this woman on a forum, she always advocate for polygyny. I was interested in her and I got to know her story.

Can we also compare her husband with men that call their first wives SHAYTANA because of their natural pain?

As long as we insist that polygyny must not cause hardships for the first wife we will continue to have problems as an Ummah. As much as it is not possible to tell a woman in the labour room not to hurt, it is insanity to ask a first wife not to hurt in polygyny.

Just last week a woman messaged me from The Philippines asking me to suggest the best therapist to visit because she is desperate to get over her difficulty in polygyny. I told her, I am in Nigeria and I know nothing about therapists in the Philippines. That is another example of a first wife who is trying to get over the difficulty that according to some people shouldn't exist.

Even if it shouldn't exist it is existing so what can we do to manage it? Being cruel? Definitely not! I think kindness to first wives is also required as much as lonely sisters need it.

Finally, I am not trying to make light of the hardships of lonely sisters. I am only trying to ensure that we do not cause more problems while trying to solve a problem. Polygyny is permitted by ALLAH, as much as it solves major problems in the society it comes with its own hardships.

● In case you have read my article titled "In the depth of heart" and you feel that I am an advocate of second wives, suddenly you read this one too and you are wondering; Is she an advocate of first wives? Know that, Hamidah does not advocate for, nor against polygyny, I am only interested in polygyny as I am interested in agriculture.

May ALLAH grant us understanding.

© HAMIDAH BINT ABBAS

@ hamidahbintabbas.com

This is a thought provoking writeup that validates the feelings of the 1st Wife, consciously or unconsciously we tend not to am validate the way they feel.

Chai. Many people need to get a life.

hopyroll:

Lol
Lemme tell you what I know bout Islamic marriage.
Islam forbade a women to menstruate twice in her father's home, once a women start seeing her menstrual blood, I believe you will concur with me that she's entered into a puberty age.
The logic was to cut the woman from any form zina which happening around everywhere now.
Once a woman enters into a puberty age, nature automatically start advertising her, what I meant by nature is, she starts growing breast, and some other mature parts of the body. Once all these starts, men start looking out for you, noticing you, some will even start buying you gift just get down with you, but as at then, women starts growing all these thing atleast age of 15 above, now what I understand is that, Islam doesn't want these women fornicating because naturally at teen age women start feeling arouse, I believe you will understand this as woman.
So instead of them sleeping with different man, "find them a man".
But today, girls don't become women before they start menstruating. We have seen a gal of ten who gives birth to fatherless baby. The rate at which gals grows now a days is appalling.
But in Nigeria todag, we see marriage at a teen age as abomination while zina at 12 is seeing of something that is normal.
I'm sorry this is how best I can answer your question.

Where is your prove that islam forbade a woman to menstruate twice in her father’s house?