₦airaland Forum

I'll walk up to him  with a smile on my face and the start the conversation thus;

Me: <smiles> Hi, may i join you?

Guy: Go ahead

Me: You're too handsome to be eating alone but i hope i'm not encroaching?

Guy: Thanks for the compliment, you're not.

Me: My name is Princess, may i know your's?

Guy: Funky

Me: Woah! that's a f'wonderful name. (meanwhile eating continues after which i'll answer one fake call and take my leave)

Me: Honey sorry i've got to rush to the bank and change my hard currency to naira, if you don't mind may i have your contacts? Here's my complimentary card. I'll call you when i'm through in the bank.

Guy: <smiles for the first time> Oh! i'm very pleased to meet you. Here's my number; ,

Me: catch ya later.

Nice pictures! But why are we cutting cakes at traditional weddings?

These guys are the funniest in Nollywood. Like someone rightly pointed out; who needs Chris Rock and Martin Lawrence when these three are it?

Nkem Owoh
Victor Osuagu
Sam Loco

Ekamas:
wow dis is so 1derful we v so much bunch oc talents in dis nation my ribs is actually cracking well did u guys 4get abt dis?
REBRANDING by Dora.
G'BANJ by Genevieve.
EYEBALLS by Asiwaju.
SOCKETS by Segun Arinze.
EXPOSE by Mercy Johnson.
ALBINO by FREEZE
SHORT PUT by Julius D Genius.
NATURAL ENDOWMENT by Omotola.
ZIP UP by 2Face.
FABULOUS CHEST by Corsy Orgiakor
RACISM/RACIST by FREEZE.
DRY BONES by Funmi Iyanda.
COPY CAT by MO Abudu.
MASCULIN by Weird MC.
PATIENCE by Goodluck Jonathan.
NEVA GIV UP by Atiku.
TOO DRY by Larry D.
MR BRIEF by MI.
EXPIRED by Ruggedman.
KING OF DEMONS by OBJ.
I RULE by OBJ.
3RD TERM by OBJ.
EXPIRED AT 40 by Funmi Iyanda.
GRA-GRA by Jim-Iyke.
D WOH-WOH by Adams Ashiomole.
MS PANCAKE by Muma-Gee.
OVER FATTED COW by Dele-Momodu.
G'BANJ by D'banj.

O boy! you wicked'o

9ja - Good people, Great Nation

Woah! i was for Spain right from the onset but when Germany thrashed the Argentines i switched my support to them. But to have my beloved Spain send out Germany? It feels good. Germany deserves the third place and Spain deserves to top it but me feels Netherlands also deserve it.

So we should stop carrying babies on our back cos you've travelled and seen the world and your culture has now become primitive?

She's so stupid. She knew lesbianism is not accepted here and yet she went ahead to dip her hands into her boss's daughter. Next time she'll be wise.

So i don't have an admirer here? 
no probs.


I admire 190 cos he does not lack words in any situation he finds himself in.

190:
[b][color=#000099]natashaluv
Listen i aint talkin abt no damn crappy internet pics
Im talkin abt in the real
if u see my 3pack abs
still workin on making it 6 or even 9pack
your pants would wet immediately and i bet you $200
that the pant wont dry under hot sun for good 3days it would be drippin
Juicewater!

Woah

Sound of Music
Phat girls

Were there no guest at the wedding?

Mardi Gras:
I entered this okada one time like that,
I was seriously pressed (i needed to shitt )
My house no far, but if i trekk na poo for road be that.
I paid before i boarded the okada, in order to save time when i disembarked
Omo for road i come mess (fart). I thought the smell will dissipate since air dey blow, but i was DEAD WRONG!
The smell just the follow us they go, needless to say it was terrible.
I held my breath hoping the guy no go smell am, but i didnt have a prayer
before i know okada man don dey shout "O boy wetin, wetin, wetin!!", come dey swerve left and right
Omo the guy stop o, climb down start to halla, dey mix yoruba and english. Other okada men (obviously his friends) come around, the guy just they yarn opata like say i kill person. Omo see embarassment
I just jump down, since my house no far. . .take off before i poo for road

I see the idiottt one other day, the guy dey wave me. . .FOOOOL!

Definitely post of the year!

siyanda.N:
What made you think that ALL Nigerian men are scammers?

Well if its not ALL THEN its 99.9%. I am sorry but Nigerians are NOT to be trusted. I am in South Africa and there is a Christ Embassy church here by Chris Oyakhilome, his brother Ken Oyakhilome's wife is heading it. Come on!!!

@ Siyanda; so sorry that 99.9% of people staying in South Arica are HIV positive. It's a pity for y'all.  

Aglah1976:
@ SmashingM, Can i get to know you

What do ya wanna know?

Chimezie mgbeanu:
there is no doubt 'Genni nnaji' is having affair with 'dbanj' 4 real. Ok, Y would they agree 2 sing 2gether. Genni must have agree with him dats y she appeared on dat video, Reason wella.

Wise one! very wise!! !!!

I went out one afternoon wearing a skirt. I climbed okada and since my legs were on both sides of the bike, i was vulnerable to this lunatic who pretended as if he was rubbing his waist and sunked his hands into my pants. Thank God i wore pants that day. I've never abused someone like i abused him that day. Girls beware!

juanna:
i gmiuess u are sick, yaba left is waitin 4 u oooooooooooooooooooo quickly tell your people to take u there

i guess u are crazy

Hey! did you have a bowel of stupid for breakfast?

Happy

I see nothing wrong with it unless they had an intimate relationship while the friend/partner was alive. People will talk no matter what you do.

juanna:
i dont know y dis chic gene is always disgracing me how many men does she want to date she dates atiku and many more even white guys now dbanj dont know y she doesnt hav shame all d same i still like her any time i mention genevieve at home my siblings moke me, i dont know wat to do pls help me tel her to chage her ways

And who the hell are you to pass judgement? Have you read the news concerning Genevieve and D'banj? Always get your facts together before posting. Words like yours shows the world your mentality. _{low menta}

They are beautiful in their own way but i think LaCasera (hope i've got the spelling right) should have been the one to be crowned the queen. The girl is simply it!

Aglah1976:
[b][/b]
FEB 14TH HERE TOO

Woah! so nice to see a birthday mate in the house.

A-40:
Hmmm lets see even though Marriage is still at least 5 years away for moi. . . Unattractive,Not smart,Disrespectful,Vindictive,Undiplomatic,Bad cook (At least be able to boil rice for God sake),Vain (Mrs Aso-Ebi,Aso-Ota e.t.c, white gold,purple gold,pink gold,rainbow gold so on and so forth well not till i'm earning LeBron money),Frigid,Paranoid wo when man reach that bridge we go cross am

Guy thanks for making my day!  

I can't marry a self centered man, a slowpoke, an abusive man, an irresponsible (includes lies, cheating, waywardness etc.) man and above all i can't marry a MAN THAT DOES NOT FEAR GOD.

Please tell me what this girl was thinking?

Guys it's Uche Jumbo. I didn't believe her until i visited bellanaija website.