₦airaland Forum

wat abt my jokes?

this is quite interesting -
so i guess her friend has a role to play- what site shud i direct my friend for the downloaded slaps- it might come in useful.

light skin as in not heavy or as in her skin must get light

not ashamed, but i dare not see-xcept she threathens to kill the dogs
titanic
the twillight series
high school musical
alvin and the chipmunks
brokeback mountain
any movie starring paris hilton-evn d mojo was so fake

smallville- i used to love the story line and music soundtrack but season 9 is terrible- y is it all about CHLOE

a hunch back boarded a bus going to ikeja.
on approaching his b/stop he stood to alight and shouted -"o wa"
d bus driver as is custumary in lasgidi slowed down but didnt stop and said "bo le" -get down!
the hunch back shot back @d driva and sed "haba kini ti mo gbe ko ki se parachute"- "haba! d tin wey i carry no b parachute"- "dude! the load on my back aint a parachute- init"

^^^ get off 'em pills men!

mischief

Hello house pls my friend nids your candid advice- I ‘ve talked to him but he doesn’t want to listen hopefully if he reads thru this thread and the poll, he ‘ll probably get the message-
My friend lets call him Sherlock is in loff with a rili crazy chic Shabu, unfortunately for him she hardly gives him the attention he deserves rather she tinks he is a drone and her cooking is horrible her best meal seems to be  transprojection soup - I wonder wat dat is, but he says dat sumtims her attitude changes and she tends to b more caring and opens up to him, but her friend seems to b distracting her, her problem also stems from the fact dat she is trying to live up to her image as  a cold emotionless being, but  he likes her cos she is so intriguing and mysterious, I’ve advised him to quit but he doesn’t, his attitude has changed almost becoming a bozo and a wuss combined,he feels she cud me the” one” cos dey seem to share some funi tins in common.


So do u tink he shud take a walk or stay and continue bein a mumu in the hope dat she might change, is she playing hard to get?

u didnt abort out of luv rather its out of lust- she is probably very good in bed and dats wats draws u in.

it happens all d time- d girl is giving respect to  the guy dat brought her- probably dey hav a thing in common.
ur best bet was to get her number while on the dance floor- whisper it in her ear- dont give her ur fone to type it cos she wont- just let her say it and den u store it later-dats assumin u r not already tipsy and brain dead .

dats y i chose U
U ar my kind


100% complete -2hrs to go - damn i'm good

dat smile i put on ur face will cost u 500k only

men! da tin "gbono felili"
i tink u nid some cold water

p.a to snthesis

i no mind -as long as its sweet, spiicy and evrythin niice

go back to sleep jor!- e b like say u wake up on d wrong side of ur bed

match maker

conductor

a hunch back boarded a bus going to ikeja.
on approaching his b/stop he stood to alight and shouted -"o wa"
d bus driver as is custumary in lasgidi slowed down but didnt stop and said "bo le" -get down!
the hunch back shot back @d driva and sed "haba kini ti mo gbe ko ki se parachute"- "haba! d tin wey i carry no b parachute"- "dude! the load on my back aint a parachute- init"

Husband and wife were in the midst of a violent quarrel, and hubby was
losing his temper. ‘Be careful,he said to his wife. You'll bring out the beast
in me.
So what? his wife shot back. Whos afraid of a mouse?

cant stay mad for to0 long esp not @ U

hiice
missed missing U

mukina2:
you'll be sued for character defamation according to chapter 419 of the people and ethic codes of the 4th book of human law of the constitution of nairaland.

tank God say my wify na lawyer- u will be counter-sued for inciting a wrongful accusation and laying false claim to d word "twinnies", leading to grievous emotional trauma dat only $100million payment can resolve- abeg no try me o

hope i didnt chase u away - dnt eat peeps unlike d twinnies

u dey use style call me a monkey or hanger
sup wit ya - hw ur day so far!



95% complete

u don chop evrybodi finis- na me u wan com chop
- bsides i dey were U leave me - hanging

MORE,

The doctor had just finished giving the young man a thorough physical
examination.
‘The best thing for you to do,the doctor said, is give up drinking and
smoking, get to bed early and stay away from women.
‘Doctor, I dont deserve the best,said the patient. Whats next best?

GOT ANODA 1

Two terrorists were driving to the location where they intended to plant a
bomb, which one of them had in his lap.
‘Drive a little faster, the bomb may go off any minute,’ said the man carrying
the explosive.
‘Dont worry,the driver assured him, we have got a spare one in the boot.

we're ar all d male and female bashers na
which one correct

i jst got this joke, atleast i tink it is tot i shud share it -no yabis o!


An English Professor wrote the words “A woman without her man is nothing” on the chalkboard and asked his students to punctuate it correctly.



All the males in the class wrote: “A woman, without her man, is nothing”



All the females in the class wrote: “A woman, without her, man is nothing”.



Now who is correct



Na wao. Grammer pass grammer, Abi?

i read thru some of this posts and immediately i understood the motive behind it, its a carefully disguised post seeking to create doubt in the faith of some Christians- its worked in the past i.e ever wondered why there are so many christian denomination each believing in one creed or the other and critizing others for not sharing in their beliefs.

arguing abt trinity, the holy spirit,  etc is neither hia nor dia and tis utter foolishness

Christianity is about salvation/redemption/reconcilliation to the  Father, through Jesus Christ the son of GOD and living your life, overcoming sin/challenges, fulfilling destiny by the aid of the HOLY Spirit -

i 'll end with these verses-

"My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts." (Isa.55:8,9)

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding" -Prov 3:5

"God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things to confound the mighty."  -1 Cor 1:27

"I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me" -Jn 14:6

"and ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free" -Jn 8:32

"And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you for ever" -Jn 14:16

"But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you" -Jn 14:26

"That seeing they may see, and not perceive; and hearing they may hear, and not understand; lest at any time they should be converted, and their sins should be forgiven them" - mark 4:12