₦airaland Forum

SHE LOOKS 42 TO ME

chiteny: It is my dear. I am not telling you what i heard but what i experienced. I guess it is needed for record keeping and proof of parental consent before conducting the marriage. Yes you can't find this in scriptures but i guess its for defense sake (someone might come accusing the church tomorrow that they were not authorized to conduct the marriage. What proof will they have unless something written?).

If the parents are not alive, someone that could stand (especially a male member) could fill in the gap.

but the parents are alive, if she goes ahead- does it mean she is disowning her parents?

MRbrownJAY: @OP
that woman must be EXTRA STOOPID!!!!!!
if the first proposal was refused because the guy wasnt from the same state, then why the hell did she date 2 different guy who are in the same situation? after the first refusal she should have known that ONLY A GUY FROM HER STATE SHOULD BE EVALUATED!

if she brought 3 different men from out of state, expecting a different result, then she just defined INSANITY or STOOPIDITY (you choose).

as for parental consent, then it doesnt really matter what WE think as this gal values it, so let her solve the issue by dating a GUY FROM HER STATE!

u talk like falling in love with sum1 is calculated?

Kobojunkie: um . . . I happen to frequent the local RCCG church here, and I can state for a fact that there is no such document church-wide. Matter of fact, the pastor here makes sure to tell people looking to get married that marrying with parental consent or in the church is not the key to marriage and will certainly not preclude the marriage from harm.

ask any member of RCCG within Nigeria

[quote author=Sisi_Kill]Say what??!! [/quote]firm requirement from RCCG

i had to create this thread due to a personal experience, hopefully the affected persons might be able to learn from one or two valid comments.

background:
she is 35yrs old, and has jst received her 4th proposal from a guy she loves, problem is her parents insists that she must marry from her state, this is why her previous proposals were refused and she had to end the relationships, because shes afraid of being cut off from her parents dough,and her church requires a letter of consent before she can get married, unfortunately this new dud is also not from her tribe.
so the question are
1. Is parental consent really necessary
2. at what age is parental consent no longer required
3. what is the impact of marrying without parental consent
4. at what age is one really an adult under the Nigeria setting.
what advise would u give the couple. Thanks

COOLDUN: Polygamy if you can look at it from the beginning, you would see how destructive it has been. The problem we have in this modern world is polygamy; Abraham upon how he was very close and loved by God, couldn’t handle two wives peacefully ,the two women that gave birth to his two sons, Ishmael and Isaac is the beginning of the problem we are witnessing today in this world. Look at Jacob, David, Solomon, Gideon to mention but a few. These great men tried all they could to maintain peace but still it didn’t work out well. No woman is ready and happy to share his man with another woman. Any woman that saw a man who has a wife and children but still went ahead to marry that man is a rebel and a witch. She is going there to destroy the marriage, the second wives know this very well and that is why they are ever battle ready for the first wives. Polygamy brings sadness and sorrows to the family. The second wives always like to destroy the children of the first wives in order to claim that her coming in to the family is justified. I have not seen a peaceful polygamous family, they might be pretending that all is well but all is not well. So my fellow men let us take one wife and make a happy and enjoyable home. Though marriage is not a bed of roses, but the more wives you have, the more problems you will have too.

how many wives did Adam have?

278 views and 6 comments- tinz ar looking up

161 views still no comment-chei

tevinsolt: that's why they say Dog is a man's best friend, always loyal

fastforward to 2012: a man's best friend is his lawyer

68 views no comment- na wa o

This Akpos go soon die...

AKPOS was hungry and went to ‘mai shayi’ (men selling tea and bread).The following transpired between Akpos and the mai shayi.

AKPOS: u get loaf of bread?

ABOKI:yes

AKPOS: bring one; slice am two and put 2 sachet of butter in btwn.

ABOKI: happy and tankin God 4 bringing customer, was just doing as he is told)

AKPOS: u get egg?

ABOKI: yes customer

AKPOS: fry 6 eggs put am btwn the bread.

ABOKI: Okay customer

AKPOS:u get sadin 4 inside gongoni?

ABOKI: yes customer everytin dey.

AKPOS: put two gongoni inside the bread.

ABOKI: Okay customer (happy and doing as he is told, in his mind he wil make a lot of money 2day)

AKPOS:u don finish? Oya press the bread for me.

ABOKI: See am customer, i don prepare am finish.

AKPOS: . . . . . OYA CUT TEN NAIRA OWN FOR ME

ACM10: Maybe we should ask Lai Mohammed.

u mean Lie Mohammed

y me: Btw never knew it was ur bday, happy bday honey

tanx,

Gogobiri Lalas: The first thing to do when contemplating marriage is to start hanging out at a good ashi joint, they are the most truthful type of girls because all they need is gbola and mula. After that, head straight to her village and buy plenty kain kain and palm oil..the end, you are happily married

lol

dasparrow: So you are a shameless gold digger? You are looking for a woman that will take care of you? Is that how your mother was the sole provider of the family you were born into while your father was a couch potato? The bible even says that a man who cannot provide for his family is worse than an infidel. I can see you are a lazy man. You want a woman to start a business for you. What stops you from starting a business on your own? So this is what Nigerian marraiges are turning into now? And then you still want to be the head of the house when you are not bringing home the cheddar? You gotta be kidding me! Good luck in your quest to get married broke and unemployed.

dnt let an ijaw man hear what u said

[quote author=pretty-bee]If u r handsome, u have a good paying job, n of cos a catholic den call my number 08174750806[/quote]ring ring, abeg send me credit

no tips for the ladies?
well i'd like to add sum steps.

1. dont wait till ur past 25 before u think u need to settle down- it takes like two yrs to build a good relationship, and if he fails it would take another two years, by that dat time desperation sets in and u will fall for any tom, di[b]ck[/b] and snthesis
2. dnt be led by ur friends comments on ur Bf (some are pretentiously jealous and would like to have him)
3. dont be guided by his present circumstance- listen to Michele Obama
4. develop ur self, dnt be a liability
5. Go out, guys need to be able to see you often, dnt stress us with digging the garden looking for a jewel, abeg display urself.
6. Dress well- recall u are addressed the way u dress.
7. Be fun- no one really likes a bore.
8. look for a way to stand by him- hopefully he wont forget.

[quote author=Mrs..Chima]It is about the person and if that person is in agreement with you. Human time is different from God's time and when God in it...let no man put asunder what HE brought together. Amen![/quote]thank God u agree, its not abt the job

MRbrownJAY: ^^^^ bro, it is very easy for someone to PRETEND to be who they are not for a few months, and it also takes time for the true self of someone to come out. as much as you could marry someone after knowing them for a few weeks, AND BE HAPPY, i would suggest people get to know one another for a few yrs so they see if they still want to be with that person, when the sparks of that r/ship are gone.

also it all depends on how often you see one another...... if you live together right from the 2nd month of dating, then by all means, after a yr marry that person....... but if you live in Kaduna, while she is in Lagos then chances are a few yrs wont even be long enough to truly know that person.

how long will u repeat this cycle- the person will never get married at the rate u mentioned

What steps shud a lady take in other to get married?

olsmade: I'm surprised @ all d candid advice OP is garnering. From the topic and his responses, its obvious (IMHO) that he's just seeking attention and prolly enjoying it

its an educatn

buchibabe: If along d line ,u loose ur job. D woman has no choice bt to assist. Bt no b say u go open eye enta marriage jobless.

u see that's my point exactly, if a marriage is based on gettin a job, once there is no job it fails immediately

buchibabe: For Gods sake leave potentials and get ursef somthin doing first. Do u want to be insulted by a woman later in marriage? Haba!its strange to hear a guy talk dis way o. Let me tell u honestly.many pple hate carryin oda pples burden. Wit time,ur "rich"wife wil get tired of feeding u while waitin for ur potential. Hope u know marriage is nt a small somtin?

i feel the first step is compatibility, honesty in the relationship each partner knowin the true status, from there they can face every and all challenges together

buchibabe: What Don't tell me ur actually waiting for a ldy to set u up. I pity u if dats d case. Men pray for God to bless dem richly so dey can can take care of dia family n even parents. U r lookin for one woman to do dt for u. My dear go find work o. And put dat idea behind u

since u want to go biblical- God made woman as a helpmate- what if the assistance needed at that point is a connection in getting a job? will d lady ignore the potential and jst write d unlucky dude off?

p.s true life story- i know of a relatnship that has been on hold cos the family insists the guy gets a regular job, even though he's been up and running looking for a job with his certificate

MRbrownJAY: this will depend on who you are....... but if your parents dont consent, then repeat the steps 3 and 4 until you meet/date someone that they will accept...... but step 1 must always remain FIRST!

ar u saying the size of income determines ur sutability for marriage i.e zero income = nothing for the person

jay bee: I'm sure you'd agree with me that starting a family without a concrete plan shouldn't be an option on the table.

i guess u havnt pictured a scenario whr the girl sees the potential in you, and believes with time you wud get your feet so shes wiling to support you for now

buchibabe: D job issue is not optional. U need a job to take care of ur family. Even d bible says dat a man who cnt take care of his family is worse dan an infidel. Secondly to avoid insult frm d woman,berra dust ya CV now

what if the Babe has money- wudnt a job be second fiddle? she can always set up a bizness for me later

do u know the number of unemployed graduates out there- so no hope for them?

MRbrownJAY: i am sorry to say that i dont understand your question. are you saying that parents should have a say in your choice of mate?

yeah! wat if i got the job, apartment, car and ababe, but the parents end up sayin No- then its is all pointless- cos parental consent is important

@MBJ
so a job comes first, no job no hope of getting married.

secondly, i noticed u didnt mention family, ar u inferring that the family has no input in d marriage process?

thanks TV01

what if i have all these but no job, will a girl i want to marry find me attractive?