₦airaland Forum

Vick4rill:
valantinemary, i initially wanted to ignore ur post. cus you are among the few unintelligent atheist on this forum. but for the sake of innocents mind reading this: hindu's and muslims are far better than you in all ramifications. atleast they have a direction. the worst kind of a person on earth is some one, that has no direction. and that is what atheist potrayed. you just formulated lies about a friend who is living in paradise cus he married a christian lady. what prove do u have for this? do you sleep with them in their bedrooms and take records of their private life. b4 u strt typing this poo here, you should have atleast show me. hw it is impossible for the things i listed to occur.

Pls i have to disagree with this abeg. I am a christian but
How many times have u heard of atheists forming terrorist groups to defend allah like the muslim fanatics do? Atheists are far more peaceful than religious fanatics in a religion like Islam.
If u tell me that atheists are not better than comitted born again christians and liberal muslims, i may accept, but for atheists not being better than all religious people (both liberals, fanatic, extremist), then capital NO.

My only problem with atheists is the way they ridicule God and other people's religion, some words from them can be so shocking and have no boundaries, but i must confess that these people called atheists are very intelligent people.

KingEbukasBlog:
Marry an atheist and ruin your marital life forever . He subscribes to subjective morality - he'll beat the hell outa you and justify his actions .

I am a christian and in a relationship with an atheist and i think my post was the reason for OP's thread.
Wait o, are you trying to tell me that christian men dont beat their wivesd I think this is based on personality and not really religion. Some people are very hot tempered religion nothwitsanding and can do anything.
The atheist i am dating can hardly hurt a fly unless if unduely provoked, but i think all men are like that irrespective of their belief.

KingEbukasBlog:
Marry an atheist and ruin your marital life forever . He subscribes to subjective morality - he'll beat the hell outa you and justify his actions .

I am a christian and in a relationship with an atheist and i think my post was the reason for OP's thread.
Wait o, are you trying to tell me that christian men dont beat their wives? I think this is based on personality and not really religion. Some people are very hot tempered religion nothwitsanding and can do anything.
The atheist i am dating can hardly hurt a fly unless if unduely provoked, but i think all men are like that irrespective of their belief.

hopefulLandlord:
you've lost track of my Posts

my point is that you may never know whom an atheist is in real life especially in an ultra religious country like ours

have you ever wondered why there are so many atheists on Nairaland and you rarely meet them in real life? because they are in your churches, they might be sitting beside you during services, they might be the ones to hold your hands and pray when the pastor says so, that pastor might be a closet atheist too

those examples of preachers just details some who were regarded as "born again" by their fellow Christians, not one Christian knew they were atheists until they came out


its you who needs to comprehend my posts better

But why should u guys be hiding in the midst of religious people? Does it make any sense?

traware:
Such arrogance!!! Simply because you have a pus.sy and you are a christian which make you falsely believe you are superior to others.I've got two words for you...FU.CKK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, well not my fault for the making. Atheism is very odd in Nigeria because the overwhelming majority of Nigerians are religious. So u guys have to put up with us.
And tell me, why do u guys woo religious ladies in the first place? And u guys will not tell the lady at first until when the lady now finds out deep down later.

traware:
There is a very very very small pool of atheist women available to atheist men in nigeria and a man has got to "burst a nut".So what other choice does he have but to manage the women available to him?Aint no male atheist in nigeria actively seeking to get hitched with all these christian and moslem nutcases everywhere.We are just compromizing.Daz all

Yes and thank God u know. There is really something wrong with atheism and that's why women (who are smarter and more sensitive naturally) see no reason in practicing such lifestyles with no reasonable benefit.
You guys should stop chasing religious women!

simplex2:
My dear, the answers you seek for is not on nairaland because no man comes with instructional manual. We will only comment based on our own opinion, you are the one that wears the shoes and will wear the shoe for the rest of your life. Discuss with him and express your fears. Me personally, I won't tolerate a fanatic-christian as a wife; someone who will spend more hours on prayers than on sex, do fasting and starve me on the process, spend more nights for vigils than a career nurse does at work, invite strangers to come and do special prayers and deliverance in my house everyother week, impose strict religious rules on my children... Trust me, your fiance may have some of these fears too so its not just you that have fears.

Your bible says 'two cannot work together unless they agree...' so talk with him and see if the fears will be alleviated.

LoL, you have really said it all. Thanks

This is true

My only fear and uncertainty in all these is the unstable nature of men. Men are known to change very much after marriage and i really don't know why.
The man who will be pampering you today and making so much promises on how he will sacrifice a lot for you will instantly change tomorrow after you have started answering his name and will now start dictating and setting down rules for you when you move into his house.

Pls all the Atheists here encouraging me to go ahead with this relationship, what if i become his wife tomorrow and he now changes his softer and relaxed religious attitude and now becomes a core or die hard atheist and starts dictating religious boundaries for me since am now under his authority, what would i do then? Cos you guys can agree with me very well that you men do change after marriage.

stephenmorris:
an atheist doesn't beleive in god because he knows god doesnt exist while an agnostic might beleive in god but is not sure if god exists or not

killsmith:
Throw the gold away....go marry brother Paul the prayer warrior, who'd end up cheating with sister Mary the choir mistress....iranu....

simplex2:
You finally had the chance to fall in love with an atheist and you are complaining.
Atheists don't worship god, so he will direct all his worship on you; you will be loved, cherished, adored, revered, cared for, pampered and literally worshiped!

exceltech, Seun

RaptObserver:
you should ask him how he intends to perform the marriage rites. But truth be told, Atheists are not monsters the way some ppl paint it. It is better you ask him to tell you why he chose the path so you can understand him better. You have said, he has all you need except religion, in life we can't have it all. We have seen pastors who beat their wives, some cheat on their wives and some abandon(divorce) them. So being religious is not a guarantee.

nubian999:
You should talk to him about this. Find out what he wants and then see if you are looking for the same things. He could tell your mum he's not religious and she might lecture him a little.
If you can accept him and respect the fact that he is a grown man who is capable of understanding the world for himself. Then I don't see the problem. But if like most people you're worried about what others will say or think about your husband not being at church or whatever he's expected to do then don't stress yourself and leave him.
You need to talk to him find out how life with him would be like. If you can have an understanding where you're loyal to each other and you are both welling to compromise a little then there is hope. I think it's too soon for you to be stressing about his religious views when you don't know each other well enough to know that you are compatible on other levels. Just enjoy him and plan together how you will overcome your religious differences.

Thank you dearies. I guess before i take any decision i have to really have a heart to heart talk with him on so many issues and i guess i will take my final decision and conclusion based on his responses.
I will go back to him and see if we can make arrangements and plans of the present and future compromises and sacrifices we are bound to make if we are ever going to be together. If he will be willing to compromise many things i will accept him, if he won't i will have no option but to leave him because it is very obvious that a die hard atheist and a comitted religious person can never really be together.

Our society is a dominantly religious and christian society and so atheists really have to make a lot of compromises to be with we christians.

Ranchhoddas:
Why do I get the feeling that your mind is made up already?

That comment doesn't my mind is made up already. Even if i won't continue with the relationship, it doesn't mean i will not acknowledge the truth, and the truth is that we have good and bad people in all divides.

simplex2:
I'm agnostic, we are close relatives to atheists so I can tell you authoritatively that being in love with an atheist is the best thing that will happen to you. My fiance is a Christian and we don't have any qualms. She drags me to church once in a while but she knows the only God I worship is her and my tithe belongs to her; all special seeds, first fruits, special covenant offering belongs to her. And mehn do I love her? She's my own goddess and I adore her like no other.

So my dear, don't let this opportunity slip you by.

Wow, datz lovely.
But pls what is the real difference between an atheist and an agnostic? I practically see them as the same thing.

This is unbelievable.

simplex2:
You finally had the chance to fall in love with an atheist and you are complaining.

Atheists don't worship god, so he will direct all his worship on you; you will be loved, cherished, adored, revered, cared for, pampered and literally worshiped!

How do u mean? Are u an atheist or are you married to one?

classicB:
@ OP who told you the Christian brothers are better? Hypocritical set of people that goes to church on Sunday's and commits all sort during the week. All those wife beaters, cheaters, smokers and so on are either Christian or Muslim And not more morally upright than an atheist. This guy is not criticizing you for who you are, I.e a Christian, he's in love with you for who you are, you can as well love him for who he is. That person talking about prayer, if it could solve all problems in marriage including domestic abuse I bet u wouldn't hear of a Christian couple divorce There's a lot ahead anyway. I wish you the best in whatever you decide

Cutehector:
Everybody quoting 2 Corinthians 6:14 should just keep shut! Yes, shut it!
What nonsense...
How many married so called Christians who commit adultery? Huh? All you people knw is to quote scriptures, but when it comes to keeping the commandments, everyone pretends to hide under the "we are human beings" clause.
Op please get married to that man! I don't care how you wana do it, just get married to him.

Thank u so much guyz. I love your points. Morality to a large extent does not depend on religion from what i have observed.
There are christians with extremely terrible characters and non christians with a kinder heart or a greater morality. May God help us all to be better people.

Seun:
The most wonderful man you have met in the world is an atheist. That's great! You should convert to atheism so you can be equally wonderful.

That i think would be practically impossible. I have already had the conviction of Jesus as the saviour of the whole world and salvation for mankind.

Men may act good towards women before marriage but after marriage they change. I think there are good and bad people in every belief, atheism notwithstanding.

Nigayoyo:
Yes I'm an atheist and you do not have to tell your family he's an atheist, rather tell them he's the best man you've ever met....Of course the marriage will take place in a church because I'm pretty sure he wouldn't mind.

Now, children are the most delicate issue here. For instance, once my kids reach age 5 or 6 I will buy them story books on Jesus, Prophet Mohammed, different myths of creation, children's books on Buddhism, Hinduism, and Zeus. The reason is to free them from the shackles of dogma and not indoctrinate them into any organized religion.

I and my wife will let our children understand our belief system and why we are convinced. There will be no trying to force them into our 'religious' inclination. Make your children inquisitive, don't make them to just stick with traditions, that's very detrimental.
My dad is still a pastor in Nigeria and he still does evangelism in villages but he knows I'm an atheist!

I wish I could explain more..enjoy your life.

Ok, but like you said, the children part is the part i don't think i can cope with, i could cope with every other thing. I cannot imagine my future kids as strong atheists who will disregard all that i have to offer as a mother.

Is your wife an atheist too? And a Nigerian? I've never heard of female atheists in Nigeria.

And you really did not understand my first question, i did not say i was going to tell my mother that he is an atheist, but my mother will surely engage him in a personal conversation if i take him to her and religious questions are inevitable. What will he say if she starts asking him the name of his church, denoination, fellowship, Pastors e.t.c? If he lies, and she later finds out, it would all be directed to me and i will not be able to withstand the pain and dissapointment my mother will feel and show towards me. And if he tells her the truth, she may not bless or approve the marriage.

tukdi:
My dear sister, please run for your life!

He can only manage you for a short while because the relationship is still fresh, later on, he will definitely show you his true colours!

Sister don't forget that his atheist friends will be coming to visit him in the house ie: You will be surrounded by atheists.

Your children might be atheist aswell because they might lack the fear of God! You will be the only person saddled with the responsibilty of training them in the ways of the Lord!

So because of marriage and money, you want to marry an atheist?


Please once again, flee from that man!!!

@your 2nd to last paragraph, i did not love him because of money. I am a graduate and i have a thriving business which fetches me my own income. He is richer than me, but i did not fall for him because of money but his good looks, character and intelligence.

sexymoma:
Think of your kids future darling
you are gonna confuse dem
which way to go...
you gonna tell dem about Christ, he s gonna tell dem he doesn't bliv in Christ
Forget love ooo... E dey fade in marriage
and besides you guys jos started, everything will still be new.
u better decide before it's too late.

I'll Advise you..Marriage where God nor dey involve na yagayaga e dey be oo
don't get me wrong, i mean your Marriage will jos be there.
There will be sometimes when you can't face the battle alone abi you think say marriage dey sweet forever ni
There'll be need for both of you to call on God, How are you gonna cope.
Pls tell me.
Think about it sis... you said he s sweet, caring and all that.. im not saying he s pretending ooo
buh hope you remember satan was an angel too... as a matter of fact, history made it known to us that he has the sweetest voice among angels.... Just think about it, Look into the future and imagine it, Him, You and your kids

I think you are right. I just wish i knew all this earlier before going deep into this relationship. I will really need a long time to recover from this.

hahn:
Atheism is not belief, it is the lack of belief in any deity or supreme being. Why is that so hard to understand?

Ok, but i tot some atheists claim that they believe in themselves and their belief is in themselves. Or is that different from atheism?

Nigayoyo:
my sister, religion should have nothing to do with your love life because from the beginning it was not so BUT along the line as our brain evolved we thought there would be a shitty a.ss flying monster in the sky. Please love him for the content of his character and not for his belief or disbelief in a sky daddy.

What do u mean by a sky daddy? Seems like you are an atheist too?
If i accept him peradventure, what of my family? They may not, especially my mother. If we are to get married, the wedding will obviously not be done in a church or by a pastor, which is against my belief. What if he insists that our children must be atheists? These are issues that will be there.

HungerBAD:
Leave religion out of the matter of the heart.

It is his right to believe in whatever he believes in,and as long as those beliefs do not harm you,or him even forcing you to be an atheist,then follow your heart.

Who is Christian?I am sure there are more Atheist who do more good,than those that claim to be Christians.

If marriage is your intention,then you guys should have a talk on how you guys wants the kids raised.

There are Atheists here married to Christian women,and I think they have a good marriage.

Hahn come here,shebi your madam na Christian?

Thank u for your response. I always kept on hearing of Nigerian atheists, especially here on nairaland, never really thought that i'd ever be involved with one like this. It seems like atheism is really growing in Nigeria.

I wish this could be as easy as u say it. I was planning on taking him to see my mother soon, what would be my mother's reaction if she asks him his church denomination and he replies 'I am an atheist'? She will never accept, i know my mother. It will be so terrible.

Hmm, terrible. Yoruba demon indeed. LoL

Rivers, Rivers, so much militancy and cultism in the state.

It started many weeks back i met this guy at an event, we exchanged numbers and since then we have been very close. We have gone out on dates together and i must confess that my love for this guy has grown so much that hardly a day goes by that i don't think of him and the same thing on his own path towards me.

I got the shock of my life 3 days ago when i was with this guy and somehow our conversation veered towards religious issues seriously for the first time and he told me plainly that he does not believe in God, i taught he was joking at first until i confronted him and he told me that he is an Atheist and nothing i can do to make him change his belief, that i either accept him for who he is or nothing else.
He said he can accept me for my religion and if our relationship leads to marriage, i can maintain my belief and he maintains his own.

I was born a christian and from a strict religious home and i still maintain christian values on my own even though i may not be so much religiously strict.
I blame myself though for not noticing this about him earlier, because initially i slighlty noticed that whenever i make religious exclamations, he acts uneasy and always changes the topic whenever i tilt towards religious discussions. We are in the same profession so most times our discussions are in that direction.

I left his place since that day and we have not spoken since then, but this guy's thoughts cannot leave my heart. He is the most wonderful guy i have met in my life, he has all the qualities i want in a man (except for religion), and my heart cannot just let go.
Pls, what should i do? I have never been so confused b4.

Hmm, quite true.

OMG!

This is sad, i hope the boy is just joking.
But i really don't understand some girls, how can a guy trick u into his room? And u fell for it, unless if diabolical powers are involved, then i can understand.
The boy is still a young boy, if he means what he is saying and he continues that way, it will not be long b4 he will get himself in trouble.

OMG, genieluv dear, so you are still battling these guys since that day?
Men are you an amazon of a woman , well 4me i'd say you should take a chill. You are too much to be wasting your time on these IPOB children of hate, we know them everywhere and their bottled up souls of frustration, embitterment, despondence and self-inflicted pain.

Ngozi123:
Omg, this woman can lie . I found it very suspicious that they comment a few minutes a part. @SpicyJosBabe, why is it that whenever you'll make a comment a few minutes after genieluv does and then she'll make a comment a few minutes after you leave?

Pls do not mention my name again or drag me into this nonsense, what do i really care about Anioma, Enuami or whatever? Do not mention me here again please.

genieluv:
Oh, so you reached here. LoL. Don't mind me and these Ipob miscreants. These people are nothing but scallywags. Their hatred has so much filled their souls that the whole world has turned upside down for them and they cannot accept life the way it is.
I am exchanging words with them like that because these retardds want to drag my paternal state Delta into their Biafran madness but they will surely fail.

Thanks for your comments anyway

Okay, but just take it easy pls. Some things like this are not worth it at all.

Ngozi123:
What brought you to this thread? I only ask because this is the 33rd page of a thread that, until recently, had very little to do with northerners so I'm interested as to how you found it.

ikechu1:
Thank God I'm not the only one interested cause noticed she's the only following genieluv have. Hmmmm
Let me not even say anything.

LOLL
Okay, you guys should tell me what's on your minds. I am dying to hear it.
I think i better leave this thread before i join in this word exchange.

I said it before that genieluv is my ardent follower on this site, i followed her back and got to meet with her since we are both based in Jos. I also monitor her posts and voila here i am at this spot ok?

Hmm, i normally do not involve myself in threads and issues like this but i will just because of two things, for the fact that someone started insulting northernerns here and the doubt of genieluv's identity.

First of all, nobody should insult the north or northernerns or middlebelters just because of a comment by genieluv because as he has rightly said here, no Jos or Benue person or any middlebelter or any northerner cares about whatever Delta igbo, Amiona, or Anioma, enuali or Ika or Achiona or Anochia means. Are these spanish words or what? I have never heard of these places or names or whatever in Nigeria and this is probably because i am not from Delta or even from the south.
So nobody should insult any northerner because of all these craps or issues of identity.

Secondly, genieluv is someone i met on nairaland because she regularly comments on my threads and we became friends and i have met her in person since we both reside in Jos. She has actually told me that she is originally from Benue and somehow Delta, but i personally don't care about all these because i know nothing about them.

Hmmm