₦airaland Forum

Dont do it. Your own wedding day will lose its specialness for sure. Plus it is illegal as others said so it is fraud. Committing that sort of fraud here comes with a jail sentence. Its very serious. You will always be 'divorced' What happens if you meet the man of your dreams. How will you explain. Be very careful. Check out the punishment then decide. I dont know about where you are but here its very difficult and people doing what you are thinking have made it a nightmare for those that really are in love. My friend just spent over a year trying to get fiance visa. Not being able to be with the man she loves cos people who have no respect for the law have screwed it for everyone else. Typical. Cost them so much money, stress, drama, time, etc. Marriage is a sacred thing not a business deal.

Poster, say no i am not in a position to help you this time, see what happens. It makes me crazy when people do that. She needs to get off her butt and do for herself. I assume she has parents. She has found herself an unlimited bank account, yours!!! You are not helping her at all, you are enabling her to not learn to look after herself. She will either step up in her own life or find some other dude to sponge off. Helping out once or twice is one thing but all the time and she never pays back or say thank you. Unbelievable!!!

190, the boi is rockin whatever he does as usual, hehe!! He goes to his dads this year for christmas, first time ever  So i am heading to my mums. Havent had christmas with her since i was a kid, always at my dads. Mum's doing the whole feast, turkey, ham, baked vegies, plum pudding and lots of goodies. Feel free to stop by for a full belly if your passing through

^^angry face!!!! Im not going to stop picking you up on that. Dont make me call you the christmas grinch!! Smile!!!!

You guys are unbelievable. Ypu can start all these threads women bashing of every colour and Mrs.Eve speaks to the women herew and you all have to act like childre. Cant you take your head out of your butts and concede that she was not speaking to you. Go open your own thread. There are plenty of women bashing going on so go join them. You guys can be so immature it scares me!!!

We always took turns each year. All my married friends do the same. One year at one parent, next year at other parents and go from there.

Yep. He has two kids to a previous marriage and she has one child. They all live together but her daughter spends a lot of time at my house after school. She is not happy and is now showing some behaviour problems whereas before she was the best kid, apart from mine, hehe.she is considering going to live with her dad. See what happens when you make a choice based on selfish needs or deperation. Everyone is affected.

^^ I have heard that in some cultures too! I guess with sex it sort of pans out the longer you are together but i do think its important to keep some physical contact even if its not sex. That scared me the most when i dated a Nigerian guy. I was concerned at the importance but on the family. I understand to take care of family and family is important but i am also a believer in 'leaving and cleaving'

I would relocate for the guy i love. Life is too short.

Family interferences are a relationship killer. There should be no limit on sex, One of the benifits of marriage is sex when you want. I would not be happy with that. The biggie for me is limited family interference. It can be so damaging!

Just wanted to add that i am loving this thread. Im learning so much about other sides to things and love the fact that its just people sharing opinions without personal attacks or name calling. Awesome!!!!

Thank you MzDarkSkin. I appreciate and totally understand what your saying. I was a little concerned that i may upset you with what i said but had to say it anyway.

Dapobear, you hit the nail on the head. I agree that us whities can be a challenge for those not used to our way of being raised as women equal to men, hehe! Some times if you even mention that a women should stay home and raise the babies you will incure the wrath. I happen to believe that for myself as i was raised that way but everyone has to make a choice for their own path. I would love to be able to stay home and raise babies and let the guy take care of stuff outside but thats not my life. Its very unfashionable her to think like that but i certainly encourage my sisters and friends to do for themselves if thats what they want. It takes a secure man to deal with some of us.

Mrs. Eve. Yep you are right again. I see your point.

I dont know about thugs and deadbeats. But when i started dating a nigerian my father was concerned with the perseption that African guys like their women to be submissive and do what their told, like seen and not heard. My father knows i am not that kind of chick so he was concerned and raised the issue with me. Thats was just one perception that i know of. I told my dad that if that is what my guy wants he will learn soon enough that he picked the wrong girl!! . The biggest perception here i found on the subject of Nigerians is the scammer issue. I know a lot of communities here think they are all scammers looking for either money or visa's. Thats was raised with me too. My answer was again that he will be sadly mistaken as i have no money and am not looking for marriage so either way he will be screwed!

^^wow, harsh! Im interested to know why you say they dont.

Omolola, good to see you back. Was concerned if you where doing ok but your here so all good.

Im sorry MzDarkSkin but i cant walk away or stay away. If everyone just walked away from people we dont agree with we would never get anywhere. I understand that some people will not be budged and i know i have to choose my words carefully on this subject. Some of the biggest racist i find in my own family. We agree to disagree and they know to not bring up or say their vomit in front of me or i will start on them with no end. But i do believe that sometimes you have to make a stand and let people know that its not ok to spew their vile all over the place. As a white i believe its important to stand up and argue that throughout history white people have been totally abhorrent in their actions. Their behaviour discusts me. But we are never going to get anywhere if we dont make an effort to move forward together. 

Since i have been on this site i have lost count of the number of times i have heard 'ugly, fat white girls' and everyone is entitled to their opinion but imagine a white saying that about a different race!! My god, hell would break loose. Its just not cool thats all.

Here endeth my speech, hehe!!

^^didnt like what??

I dont know if its safe for whites as ive never been there. I guess it depends what area you go to. I guess like most places there are areas to stay away from. Im sure the others who have experience there will answer that one for you.

My dear 190, 'Black british men never fall in love with  African men' What the?

Hey poster. There is no reason why you guys cant make it work. Learn each others culture and you will be fine. I wish you all good things.

^^but why would you settle for that for yourself. Dont you deserve better than down some girls pecking order. You are a unique individual so why wouldnt you want more for yourself. Behave better and you will get better.

MzDarkSkin:
Why get a women who is full of esteem? She is the downfall of chauvanism.

@Tink you have to realise there is alot of anger towards whites and for obvious reasons. This is reality and they have the right to say what they want to say. Some bash Jamaicans and I defend Jamaica because I know I would do the same if a Jamaican was to bash on Nigerians. Had the poster said "black men let's get these white beauties and leave these fugly sisters" would you be so passionately outraged?

yes i would be passionate about any colour women as i have been. Skin colour is not supposed to be the issue. Its supposed to be the indiviaual. its wrong to generalise any man or women. If someone has a problem with a particular person then thats one thing but to put everyone in the same box is ignorant.

As far as anger towards whites for obvious reasons, dont even get me started. Its something i am passionate about like a crazy women!! Isnt it time to stop blaming and make a change themselves. Yes horrible things where done but not to you personally but to your ancestors same as me. Im so sick to death of coping it cos a white guy hundreds of years ago did something that has no relation to me. I should be judged only on how i personally treat people not some people that just happened to have the same colour skin as me on the other side of the world or even here hundreds of years ago. Is it not racism when a person is judged by the colour of their skinI wasnt there for goodness sake. It would be the same as me saying all Nigerians are scammers!!! Same crap, different colour!

moyoct14:
@Tink_sh
God bless you!

^^you too!

^^always with the angry face! Is it the ice and snow making you cranky?? Cheer up, its almost christmas

^^I know all!! hehe! I know very well she is not an aussie! My dear 190 you give away too much when you comment so everyone knows all about you. There are no secrets for you. Ummm how can she be a Yoruba lady and a 'jamo' as you call it??

White bashing, thought you all where better than that. I think the poster is jealous as he cant get a white girl, ugly or not!!! Sick stupid racist thread. Poster have you ever been to all the places you listed?? Ignorance is a very ugly quality!!!

^^congrats to you and MzDarkSkin!!! ^^

REALITY101:
Tink_sh remember we're happily married? so please stop crushing on 190

You and 190 married hehehe!!! Im so disappointed to hear you too have fallen for 190's charms like many before you. Is there no sane people left on here. I really expected more from you REALITY101!! So sad 

^^I really hope so. I understand its so difficult for you but nothing is impossible. Short term pain to walk away for long term gain to re start your life. All the best.

Really?? You believe that story? Girls are funny!! You guys will believe anything.

Beware, its a test!!!!

Men!!!!!