₦airaland Forum

How small is it?

Them no teach me for school
So I have to do findings/research/ google

First thing that came to my mind: ‘ But these people are respectful na’

Kdon2:
Can you imagine! You see why we are world apart. You will rather have a home filled with those kind of damaged women than a home that you can reset yourself. You people still have a long way to go.

So you would rather prefer being infected?

Kdon2:
I won't marry ibo now, so it's not possible.

Okay
So you would marry Yoruba

What would you do, if you come back home to meet your home dirty and smelling?

muyico:
Your mom don't failed you, but you failed yourself !
I could vividly remember my late mom, she didn't blived in education, she only blived on handwork, like acquiring a skills, but I gat determination to be graduate, my brother's,?? My sister's?? I enrolled to pt programme, now! I'm HND holder in computer!

Omo
Make I sha no talk Wetin Dey my mind
But yeah…. Congratulations

Sircharacter:
Happy birthday to Port Harcourt boy. Long may he lives and reigns

Port harcourt?

I thought he is from akwa ibom or cross river

tobeezman:
I met this fine geh at a tech event in Lagos.
Before the event started, we had a little chit-chat and mehn, she was exactly my type. Beautiful, intelligent, confident, and we just clicked. You know that kind of connection that feels like you’ve known someone for years? Yeah, that was it.

Throughout the event, we kept vibing, laughing at the same jokes, sharing ideas, everything just aligned.

At the end, I asked for her name she said Linda.
Cool name.

Then I asked where she was from, she said Anambra.
My eyes lit up. I’m from Anambra too!

So I got curious and asked, “What village?”
She mentioned it and boom, it’s in the same local government as mine. I was like, “This is fate.”

Everything was lining up perfectly.
She was single, I’m single, we shared interests, goals, and background… until one tiny moment changed everything.

She gave me her business card and I didn’t see a single Igbo name on it.
Both her first and last names were English.

When I got home, I texted her, I asked, gently, “Don’t you have an Igbo name?”

Her reply?

“I don’t like my Igbo name, and I don’t like speaking Igbo either.”

That one message drained everything I felt for her.
Instantly.

It wasn’t about tribal pride or anything dramatic, it was just the realization that we might see identity differently.
Because for me, being Igbo isn’t just where I’m from, it’s who I am. It’s the rhythm in my thoughts, the tone in my laughter, the root of my values.

And when someone rejects that part of themselves, it feels like they’ve rejected a part of me too.

So yeah… I ghosted her.
Not because she wasn’t amazing, but because something in me went cold.

Eiyaaaa

Sorry

Better luck next time

In their 30’s I think
4 3 2 1

For this kine matter I no Dey like chook mouth

Girl if you jam who does not give a Fvck about billing, bill am

Guy, if the girl don too bill you and you no get again. To the left , to the left. Go meet who no go bill you

But then again
What I hate hearing from those broke ass girls that ain’t ready to work, or never worked in their life before is ‘ I want a man that can take care of me’ ‘ if he does not have 10 million in his account, Wetin I wan use am for? ‘ I need a man that can send me 500k every month’ girrlllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cashio:
both the seller you used in your analogy and the landlord can choose to either answer you or not. They don't owe you any explanation. If e not sweet you, go buy from another seller and if the house not sweet you, pack out after your current rent.

God punish any silly tenant that'll come to my house tomorrow and question why I make decisions to increase rent in a house I built by myself. Someone spends over 100m to built just four blocks of two bedroom flats and you'll question him why he increase his rent at anytime.

No, dem go buy you wine and bush meat joint the explanation

gods of our land oooo!!!

I say does the question warrant him saying ‘ Omo igbo wey no get manners?’
Is that the right thing to say? He rather not say anything than relating it to her tribe
Do you understand me at all?

If he like make he explain if he like make he no explain
But why relate the answer (not even an answer) to her tribe ?

SpencerForbes:
Yeah. You’ve got a point but I still see it coming into play soon. No one talked about DNA test then like the way it is preached now. If majority of Nigeria men should embrace patriarchy, then women would be made to value marriage.

The more the institution declines, the more I see women loosing (baby mamas and single mothers) and I think it’s going to get to a point where men will be so “irresponsible” that women will have no choice but to cave in. Polygamy is even closer to us than you think😁 The more you ladies act smart, the more you lose. I know it’s possible for ladies to device new schemes but if men are so emancipated that they don’t take “bullsh*te” then I’m sure we’re in for a big shock.
🚶‍♂️

You speak like, it would be a sudden change within the blink of an eye.
THE CULTURE
TRADITION

Will never permit Groom price
Polygamy has always been in existence, still being practiced. Only that, civilization ( white man education and religion) has changed the mindset of majority.

Some women still agree to polygamy in this time and age, provided the financial security is present.
And, you men shouting for polygamy hope you have the resources to manage polygamy. No be by mouth.
Na for this economy decline and struggle you wan Dey manage 3 wives + 12 children- body go tell you.

SpencerForbes:
We’ve been paying bride price especially in this part of the world for centuries, so what’s the big deal🤷‍♂️

Indians are doing it and the ladies aren’t complaining. The only difference is that African men are egoistical but I want to see the looks on women faces when a large proportion of guys start demanding it😂
🚶‍♂️

Don’t you think women will want to assume the ‘ head’ if they eventually start paying the groom price? African men Nigerian men have got pride and will see groom price as selling their man power/ man hood.

SpencerForbes:
Nah😎 We haven’t forgotten that. We just added a new one😁 very soon y’all be paying “groom price” or accept polygamy permanently 😝
🕺

Y'all be happy for your groom price to be paid by the females I doubt it though.

Sonnobax15:
Good day my fellow Nairalanders......

So there's this female neighbor of mine whom I've always rendered help to countless of times...... Tho I don't like disclosing how I've helped people but I think some people don't deserve help at all.......Last time,I was rhe one who paid her kids school fees,cuz her husband was out of town and couldn't afford to send money to his family........Well,I didn't do that without the awareness of my woman cuz she was the one whom I gave the money to go and give to her....And there were times she came to me to borrow her money,ranging to up to 140k.....Tho she promised to pay back upon the arrival of her husband...But since her husband came back,I haven't heard from them and I don't even intend on confronting them cuz I knew that money was as good as gone forever.... Hence,I wasn't expecting them to pay back as well....

Now the problem is, this the same woman came to me last week , while my woman was in my shop to ask for financial help of 12k... I told her things haven't been as good as they were before as I've just opened my shop and still trying to balance things up........ Omoh,since then,this neighbor of mine and her husband started keeping malice with me and my woman......I just weak . All of a sudden, they've forgotten everything I've done for them simply because of this one time they came to me for help but couldn't help . My woman have been planning to go and meet them to ask of the money they came to borrow but I've been telling her not to.......The worst thing is that they no longer come to my shop to charge their phones and fill their gas as well..... Imagine the same people whom I've been charging their phones for free of charge . Omoh,I swear to help people these days just tire me....

But why are some people like this?

Nlfpmod
Obembet
Mynd44
Dominique
I need answers from y'all before I will do something to this couple that will hit Nairaland Front page

They feel entitled

Leave them
Bone them

It’s good for you sef, they won’t come bothering you again for money.

Ingrates
I know people like them, very nasty set of people.

Let them keep malice till they swell up and burst

But sha be careful o, their malice can lead to hatred and jealousy and from there… something else fit happen.

Y'all have left ‘ what are you bringing to the table?’ to ‘ DNA’. This too shall pass

Is Nigeria a country?

It’s just a place taking up space, full of people with no sense of direction or purpose. A dull land where corruption runs deep and bribes keep things moving. Greedy souls everywhere, never satisfied, waving religion around like it means something — yet living like pure hypocrites.

pigmania:
Sometimes we erroneously think that we know someone else, but we are still getting to know our own selves. The key is going for someone with a good character, it is never cool to ignore red flags before marriage. I have an aunt who took her husband to Europe (she sponsored everything), he was tall, handsome, well built and crying like a kid on their traditional wedding day. He got to Europe, got a job, started getting money, drinking and probably flirting, but she couldn't hide his flaws anymore when he started beating her in her own home. It got so bad that she once jumped from the balcony of a first floor building, while chasing her with rage. Well, they are divorced now with three kids and she moved all the kids to another country. As for me, I'm not sure I'll ever get married, the wahala is just too much, but I surely want about two kids, baby mama self na another wahala.

Good example

So y’all should stop with the crazy narrative that it’s never right for Naija men to bring their wives abroad. From your example, it could also go wrong when a woman brings her husband.

nurudeen181:
About men taking their women abroad, i will say it's wrong, if a woman wants to go abroad, she should do it by herself. And first mistake men are making today is sponsoring their wedding 100% if it cant be 50x50 then you're investing wrongly.

To this statement, I have a question.
Is it right if the woman brings the man over as against the reverse? Does it make any difference ?

dbabs500:
Hello Nlanders

I will tel you guys something for sure, marriage is sweet, but the bitter part of it can affect a mans life even more than a woman. Episodes upon episodes have surfaced online regarding SOME men bringing in their wife to the western world and gradually seeing the demon crawl out of them. I have read many and heard of some within my community here in the UK. I always thought these episodes only happen to some people that it could never happen to me, bros and sis, he dey sup oo.

I don't want to delve into too many details, but I just want to share with you guys the most recent thing happening in my own, this is just to let u guys know that he unthinkable can happen to anyone whether or not you deserve it or not

So one day i decided to change the kitchen lights from the white one to the warmer bulbs, I had kept them right atop the kitchen cabinet which is a bit high. I climbed my chair and lo and behold I saw a paper neatly wrapped in a square shape, I took and opened it, lo and behold the attached is what I saw, I obviously don't know exactly what it is, so I called my mum, and the only thing she could tell me was to destroy it and up my spiritual game.

Overtime, I sort of react on situations with my wife, but I have changed ways. I politely and diplomatically approached her and asked if she knew anything about what I found, and she said, where is it, told her I have destroyed it but showed her a picture that I took. She sobbed and said she knows nothing about it, and I silently ended the convo.

A week later, I was assisting her to monitor the facebook ad that I have helped her with, a notification popped up on her computer saying ' finalize your hotel booking', which apparently popped out from bookings.com, I checked and saw that she pre-booked a hotel booking for 24th of Oct to 25th of Oct, I saw this 2 days prior to the 24th. I have had it in mind that I will not question her, set a trap and catch her red-handed, I know alot of you would say you should not have told her, she will now be smarter, I have my reasons and that's that. I left for work that day (24th), she was suppose to go for a house viewing as we are planning to move, I knew if for whatever reason, she might use that outing to go run things, that's if an actually plan was underway. On her wayback, we were talking while she was driving, then towards the end of the conversation, I asked her why she nor tell me sey she book hotel for me and her for Basildon, 24th to 25th two adults, she paused for like 6 seconds, and said which booking,then i gave her the lowdown, at first she was defensive, saying she does not want to further be asked questions, but that the pre-booking might have been done in error bla bla. I just ended it with no p, I thought I'd ask you.

Since 7 days now, she dey try seduce me, i nor gree Bleep, im just telling myself, what kind of fake life person wan dey live so, i am with a woman that at least i know she's effing someone, because she has not been caught red-handed its all 'lets continue our normal life' but me nor sabi pretend and the fear of contracting disease and also spiritual misfortune is now on the high for my mind. Winter dun come, who i wan dey nack, the depression just start now again.

Nlanders what would u do

If you bring gist come my side, I wan know everything

Ehehn, Wetin Dey for the paper wey you see ontop the kitchen cabinet when you been wan change bulb?

You sef
You for no tell am anything, you for plan am then catch her red handed, then everything go scatter🙃
Next time, keep mute and catch her.

Na from that catching, Una go come know where Una stand.

But, na you tear green card na
That means, US ain’t worth it for you
And, yeah you got served too- No visa

😂😂😂😂😂

Brighton1:
i jst wan greet u.
U no go greet me back?

No

Brighton1:
na crime say I dey greet u?

The question is: why you Dey greet me? No be crime, but there must be a reason. You never greet me before.

This girl sabi follow ‘unfine’ men

Na so e go Dey miss

Them don swear for Nigeria na

Brighton1:
Jennyclay
Ukaface
Saphiere
Goodlady

I say make I jst greet una oo, una good morning oo

Greet me say Wetin happen?

I don’t know anything about cars

Kobojunkie:
1. Everyone grows up knowing right from wrong. That happens to be the only manual one needs to be a good parent, wherever one finds oneself.

2. Everyone, including good parents, makes mistakes. Bad parents go a step beyond making mistakes. Not only do they reject every opportunity to learn from them to become better parents, but many also go a step beyond to pour all of their regrets on those kids whenever possible.

3. You mean like Boko Haram and your Nigerian Politicians move through life doing what they think is right, abi? Nonsense!

Wait to go, trying real hard to blur the line between what is right and what is wrong! You must think you did well there. 🙄🙄🙄

Do you know good and bad really depend on the context of a situation?
Being “good” alone doesn’t automatically make someone a good parent. Parenting is more like mentoring — and you mentor people based on your own principles, right?

So what happens when the child you’re trying to mentor doesn’t agree with those principles? Does that suddenly make you a bad parent?

You’re still not getting my point — your “right” or “good” might not mean the same thing to me.

Boko Haram and even some politicians believe they’re doing what’s right because, in their minds, they have a “good cause.” The people under them don’t question it either because that’s what they’ve been taught to see as normal.

It’s the same thing with parenting — people act from what they believe is right, even if it doesn’t look right to someone else.

So most often, I won’t want to blame parents 💯, until I understand certain things about them. The resources, their growing up, their mentality, their understanding of life. It takes a lot to be a parent, and while still grooming your child, you are still learning.

Mogajunior:
You sound like AI

I wish o
I for don turn myself to money making entity

Mrdealer4all:
I have so much resentment towards my parents

No one receives a manual titled “How to Be a Parent.”
Parents are simply individuals — each with their own personalities, strengths, weaknesses, and flaws — who happened to grow older. They still make mistakes, they’re still learning, and most of the time, they’re just doing the best they can. Remember, it’s a cycle: they were once raised by their own parents and shaped by the experiences and knowledge they had.

I may not know your personal story, but try to see them as people who never had it all figured out — they just moved through life, doing what they thought was right.

It is well.

You sha swear for Tunde Abi?