Valdes00's Posts
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Today in history ***** Today is exactly 8 years, 7months, 6days, 11 hours 25 minutes and 52 seconds that a gala seller ran away with my change in traffic....... |
Joshnash:I helped u.... At least it got ur attention to the extent of u commenting..... |
Smiler11:Awwwww... sorry sis.... Did d fuel price increment get to u..... |
Which sane woman will allow this kind of babe into her home as house maid..... |
theEYe21:I don't nid to be a fan bfor knowing all this..... those facts r glaring |
Club football fans in Nigeria have certain peculiarities that are very obvious. After many years of study and trips to various viewing centers across the country, i have decided to help you identify a chelsea fan by drawing up their anatomy. ***** #1. Most likely name The most likely name for a typical Chelsea fan in Naija is either Rashidi or Suraju (for male) and then Shalewa or Basira (for female) ***** #2. Most likely occupation Don’t look too far as this is pretty easy. In case you are in search of a Chelsea fan in Nigeria, just visit the nearest motor park. They are mostly agberos, conductors and motor park chairmen. Little wonder why their club have an obsession with bus-parking. **Key thing to note** To avoid running into problems with a Chelsea fan in Naija you must understand that to them, it is ‘SHELLSEA’ and not Chelsea. Attempting to correct them or try to show that you know better will only leave you looking like Petr Cech for the rest of your life. Your head will be broken and you will have to go around with an ‘helmet’. **** #3. Hobbies Smoking marijuana, arguing, making noise and then drinking their very own Chelsea dry gin. In whatever they do, they always want to rep their club. Such loyal and distinguished set of people. **** #4. Behavior Fans of Chelsea love their club so much, they get really intolerant and aggressive when anything involving it is the subject matter. Play with them small and a knife can be forgotten in your belly or a bottle can be used to test the strength of your skull. Then again, they can be really loyal. Its not so rare to see Chelsea fans naming their daughters Drogba, Terry or even Kakuta. Yeah, daughters **** #5. Most cherished feat Chelsea football club have won the Premier League and pretty much other titles in England. What’s more? They’ve conquered Europe by winning the coveted UEFA Champions League. Interestingly, all of these means little to the fans. Guess what they cherish the most? The fact that Lionel Messi has never scored against the club. So, you could be having a conversation with a friend on how great Barcelona is and a Chelsea fan will chip in – “oh BARKA? it is you people they beat na, they are our wives” ....Remind that fan the year Barcelona knocked them out of the Champions League and his reply would be – “But did Messi score?” It is something they hold very close to their heart and you really can’t fault them. Five time Balon D’or winner not scoring against a club is a big deal, right? **** #6. Favorite saying Pretty much those things you hear at garages in Lagos – “iyalaya anybody” ,”park the bus”, “Speshial one”, “The sky is blue” and so on. **** #7. Common beliefs Didier Drogba is a Nigerian. His real name is Dehinde Aderogba and he only decided not to represent the country because they possibly can’t win laurels. Jose Mourinho is the greatest manager in the history of the game. Sir Alex Ferguson, Pep Guardiola and other managers are beefing him because of his tremendous success. The English FA doesn’t like Chelsea. They don’t want them to win the League and have instructed officials to always rule against them in every game. **** #8. Feel Free to Add yours Cc: lalasticlala
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Naxo dem full NL sef.... Many impersonators.... Both male n female..... NL guy during a date with NL babe will b lik
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9. Robbery. ... anoda booming biz no matter d economy crisis ** mak una no eat me raw oo |
KIK abi..... mak I rush go download d app.... Maga mist pay by all means possible..... |
I don warn kaffy, the day wey she start to bleach, na dat day she go gt replacement..... iranu |
Chisos.... See boobs.... kai kai kai *knees down* *closes eyes* Oh Lord, I bind every spirit of masturbation in my life.... Thank u lord for answering my prayer |
Sex with a girl on her period without condom..... chisos, hw u take enjoy am...... yuck am gonna puke...... the sight of blood..... oh no.... |
HAPPY DEMOCRACY DAY...... |
SnowJay92:No b all of them understand ooo |
Yobo be like
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Xbabangida:God bless u, may u find favour in this new week..... Jus imagine the useless oblak.... Couldn't even dive.... I was really angry xtanite... I wish simeone saw Dis earlier n sub him...... He spoilt everytin.... I felt like punching his face xtanite..... Aaaarrrrgh |
EverestdeBliu:Same here bro... I felt for them |
JuanFran be lik
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Athletico Madrid Fans be lik
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God knw say I no understand wetin OP write.... |
spargs:Bros, he b like say dem don carry u for this kind thing bfor.... He happen for my face, na 5yrs in prisonment for some crime oo ..... R.I.P to the man |
No..... Buh sum1 once caught me in the act... I was lik
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Toolz be like - She can't come n use her own to spoil my own.... make she slay for naija |
ziggy3579:Vampire slayer abi |
MrRhymes101:U mean to toast bread, its easy na... jus buy d toasting machine |
Am confused.... Is seun paying people to be always Stu.pid on NL ...... jus asking nio, cos the rate at wic many people act stu.pid on NL is alarming |
Must we all die for ‘Peace’? It is with tears that I write this piece; scrolling down the pictures of dripping blood from a bus that had an accident on a Sunday afternoon which pulverized the beautiful homily I had. I had just heard about the “Holy Trinity in One God” in a Catholic church in a small town of Oyo state. In a moment, I felt like strangling a bird –though murderous still-, pull out one of it’s feathers, and then put it on the pool of blood dripping out of the bus to scribe the pain that brewed in me while looking at a Facebook post of a friend who was at the scene of the accident. How many times must this happen before we can take action? Just how many must die before we can say enough is enough? Why must it always be Peace? Anger brewed still as I recall the many deaths of friends, classmates who have been a victim of reckless driving by Peace Mass transit drivers. The scene of the accident at the Umuahia-Okigwe road involving a truck and a Peace Mass Transit bus was something greater than monstrosity; first impression of the picture would suggest a reckless driving either from the truck driver or the bus driver which had caused the untimely death of many passengers who had boarded the bus. The impact of the bus was so grave that the driver must have suffered total wreckage of his skeletal structure. Yes. You would say my narrative of the skeletal system was trivial considering the lives that were lost in the accident. But yes, our present society had made lives so trivial that when Peace Mass transit kill people everyday, we all take “I don care” attitude just because our loved ones were not involved. Must I wait till my loved one die before I must say enough is enough? You tell me. You might wonder why I seek justice with Peace Mass Transit, and not bother about other transport company. Good. We must take up a scape goat so that others can learn from it. The scape goat here should be Peace Mass Transit. During my undergraduate days at UNN, I had many horrible experiences with Peace Mass Transit which made me stop patronizing them. I have lost friends, classmates and friends’ relatives due to their reckless driving. We practically carry our hearts in our hands during school resumptions and vacations because the news of an accident was always routine during those periods. If it was not in Opi junction at Nsukka, it will be at Nite mile in Enugu; if it is not in Enugu-Okigwe road, it will be along the Eziagu-Onitsha road. And it must involve Peace Mass Transit. We just were not safe; some of us had to change to Imo Transport and Eastern Mass Transit for our safety. Enugu state is the home of Peace Mass Transit and through it, it has spread all over the country, with its strong base being its inter-state services within the eastern region. Hence, Peace Mass transit is always the first call of anyone hoping to travel within the South East and South South areas of Nigeria. While many sincere and customer friendly transport companies will take advantage of this popularity to improve their customer care while exploring their advantage against other transport companies, Peace Mass Transit only saw it as a way to explore their brigade of customers for an exorbitant gain. The background of this incessant accidents by Peace Mass Transit is this: While most transport companies manage their drivers by paying them monthly wages, Peace Mass Transit runs a system whereby the drivers earn as often as they can ply a certain route on a daily basis. The problem this system creates is that most drivers tend to drive recklessly to meet up with their own personal gains, unlike other companies drivers’, like ABC, who run a different payment system and do not put extra pressure on the drivers to meet up with any personal targets. It is a common scene to see a Peace Mass transit overtake a Toyota Tundra or Hilux which has a V8 engine like it’s a normal thing to do. This would tell you the level of speed they drive on. I once sat at a front seat in a Peace Mass Transit which boarded from Enugu to Owerri, the speed of the bus was so worrying that I had to peep at the speedometer and saw 160km/hr. Like Jesus, this was not a car race! Neither was it a “Formula-1” car. I had to tell the driver to slow down, but he groaned, like I had just said the worst things to him. He started murmuring to himself that I was acting ‘like woman’, that my complains were irritating him, that he would change my seat to to the back so I would stop complaining. I was so irritated by such words that I had to call the attention of other passengers, informing them that our driver was on 160km/hr range and did not see anything wrong with it, but rather he threatening to change my seat. Some concerned passengers started to scold him, while some did not see any fault in him driving such speed if he was cool with it. After that incident, I vowed never to enter Peace Mass Transit anymore. This is just one of those situations that happens before a major accident. The driver was driving at such a speed probably to meet up another round in Owerri. The money he would make by that trip had blinded his judgement that he had little regard, if at all, for the safety of his passengers. Again, many passengers seem to be cool with such a high speed –as long as they get to their location early- until something terrible happens, a “moment of truth” where passengers have contributed in fostering accidents on our road. The road safety corps and other stakeholders involved in the transport sector should take ardent step in curbing the menace caused by some of our transportation companies -Peace especially – by setting up and enforcing stricter rules guiding their establishments. It is not enough to license transport companies, there must be rules which strongly favour the welfare of the passengers against that of the companies. The NLC must get involved and negotiate better pay package for our drivers. Drivers should never be given the freedom to exploit passengers for their own interest. The Vehicles Inspection Office must pay regular visits to these companies to inspect their buses for certification of road-worthiness. And to the passengers, we have had lots of accidents caused by Peace Mass Transit. Let us all boycott Peace Mass and force them to change their Owner-Drivers policies which only favours them and put our lives at risk. We cannot continue to fold our hands with our “ I don care” attitude and let these people continue to manipulate our lives. The management of Peace Mass Transit must rise above its selfishness and make Peace Mass Transit customers’ safety their priority. We must be at the centre of all your future growth projections. Stop being selfish with our lives. Remember, if we all die, you die with us too. By Mbawuike Anthony |
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naijaboiy:Abi na this tomato scarcity cause am |
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