₦airaland Forum

NONSENSE!

I want it operational asap

Orijin101:
Na wetin dem dey call CATALYST be that, lemme expatiate

*You visit a lady at home or she visits you
*she knows that you might not have mojo on your phone which will make the ministry move fast
*Then, she will store alot on her phone incase of incasity
*She gives you her phone so that you can go through her media and for sure, you will see the Bleep materials
*Your joystick starts rising 12inches above the ground level
*Then you will surely need a sharpener to shapen your pencil......
*You bounce ontop her
*She removes your trouser and boxer
*You remove her pant and skirt/bombshort/trouser
*Then you insert your *some text missing*

hehehehe, I'm following you straight away.

The rate of single mature ladies is worrisome.

Nothing annoys me more than a man who trembles before a lady, unable to eja.culate the contents of his mind.

We tend to view wealth from a diabolical angle, believing that it's usually a product of occultism. Unknown to us, this mindset kills achievement-oriented habits and breeds stagnation. It's a pity some of our leaders have this 'germ' in their thoughts too.

This woman talks like someone high on cheap weed sometimes.

That awkward moment when you dance shoki for FTC only for the thread not to hit frontpage.

You can't blame them; you don't know how it feels like as a single woman. Men are increasingly becoming scarcer and uninterested in women.

It's why we the Ijaw have largely restrained them from our land. They are a personification of deadly epidemics. And to think that Buhari, who is an influential Fulani, and the braggart El-rufai have kept silent so far only surfacing to defend their people when they are attacked by host communities tells a lot about the mentality of these people, jostling to rule us.

uncleck:
Bros sorry, dnt waste ur time nd money. They are GNLD fraudsters. I was their prey last week, i was invited by Equilink ltd, it was d same address. Out of 10,500 you will be required to pay, i suceeded in paying 2k. D worst is dat u r nt given a second for decision. U'll writ test, b interviewd, employed d same day. Run for ur life

Thank you so much for the info.

menix:
Nwanne biko di kwa careful...

Do you know them or have an idea of them? I smell scam.

I am pleased to inform you that you have been shortlisted to attend a written interview with EMERALD NIG LTD on Thursday 12/3/2015. Venue: 8 Onumiri Street, Douglass of Mbaise Junction, Owerri.
I got this text message this evening. Are they real? Does anyone have knowledge of this company? Please, help me to verify if it's not a scam, Dear fellow nairalanders. Thanks in advance.

It's a phobia that has steadily grown in me over the years, and it seems to have become more pronounced with passage of time. To be candid, I used to read contempt into all psychological disorders until I diagnosed myself of this one.

I've this terrible fear when I share bed with a fellow man. I don't feel safe and secure and never enjoyed sound sleep when a man shares the same bed with me as every turn and movement of him keep me awake. Funnily enough, the suspecting fear bears no regard for kinship affinities.

I don't know when this phobia became overbearing and possessing. I've traced it to an incident in school when a male student had descended on an unsuspecting fellow male student's anus, forcing the school to take the affected student to the hospital. The affected boy lost the use of his anus for three days! Although the said homo was summarily expelled from school after the incident, the memory has lingered on and has been ossified into a homophobia.

For such reason, I don't feel safe and secure to share bed with a fellow man. I sleep soundly when I share bed with a woman or, better still, when I sleep alone. Sometimes I wear denim jean shorts to bed to suppress the fear. It's a fear I've little control over.

Does anyone else feel the way I do? Is it normal to feel so?

ziccoit:
You people are less politically sagacious. Your 100% support was based on sentiment and na our son mentality. The same thing that didn't happen in other regions. You block voted GEJ and he became president with support from other regions. Buhari despite been an Hausa/Fulani didn't enjoy same from the North and OBJ too was not block voted by SWners when he was there. You people are not just being futuristic in your approach to political game. It is you people's poorly played game that is going to assist in sending GEJ packing to Otuoke this year.

Now there is no way SS and SE can fraudulently record 94% return of registered voters like in 2011 with the card reader. Permutation doesn't favour GEJ this explain the reason presidency and PDP are fighting to discredit and stop the use of PCV and card readers.

If you like speak all the grammar in the world, but don't forget OP question. There is no higher level of sagacity than doing what has to be done. History will judge GEJ kindly in reference to the SW.

ziccoit:
Ok, I don't remember Yorubas support for Buhari presidency from 2003-2011. The question is what has GEJ done for Yorubas in the last 6years despite the total support the region gave to his presidency. Do you remember how Wole Soyinka and others from SW fought tooth and nails to see GEJ installed as the president when his kinsmen who are running mouth now were nowhere to be found?

A little learning is a dangerous thing. What form of support is better than voting for a candidate? We gave GEJ 100 percent victory in the south-south, did he enjoy the same in the south-west? Back to topic, attempt the OP JAMB question.

APC won't win the presidential election even under the headship of Jega.

I wish he said this in his campaigns in the north.

Proudly Bayelsan

sholay2011:
Nice one.

Thanks..

''Vigorous writing is concise. A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts.''
- William Strunk

Whether it's a two-word quip or a 200-word bear, a sentence must be a lean, thinking machine. Here are some notes towards efficiency and concisement in writing.

PRUNING THE REDUNDANT
Avoid saying the same thing twice. The following are examples and the correct forms:
Many uneducated citizens who have never attended school continue to vote for better schools.
Many uneducated citizens continue to vote for better schools.

A phrase that repeats itself such as:
True fact
Fact
Twelve noon
Twelve/noon
I saw it with my own eyes.
I saw it with my eyes.
A person who is honest.
An honest person
A total of 14 birds
14 birds
Consensus of opinion
Consensus
Free gift
Gift
End result
Result
Inspite of the fact
Although
In the field of economics/law enforcement
In economic/law enforcement
In the event of
If
Summarise briefly
Summarise
Period of four days
Four days
Personal opinion
Opinion
Personally, I think/feel
I think/feel
Particular interest
Interest
Shorter/longer in length
Shorter/longer
Surrounded on all sides
Surrounded
In the future to come
In the future
There is no doubt but that
No doubt
Puzzling in nature
Puzzling
Return again
Return

ABBREVIATED REDUNDANCIES

ATM machine ATM
CPU unit CPU
HIV virus HIV
AIDS syndrome AIDS

REDUCING CLAUSES TO PHRASES, PHRASES TO SINGLE WORDS
Notre Dame College, which was founded in 1871, is the premier all-men's college in Nigeria.
Founded in 1871, Notre Dame College is the premier all-men's college in Nigeria.

Recommending that a student copy from another student's paper is not something he would recommend.
He won't recommend that a student copy from another student's paper.

PHRASES YOU CAN OMIT
Be in the look out for important sounding phrases that add nothing to the meaning of a sentence.
1. All things considered
All things considered, Warri's woodlands are in better shape than ever.
Warri's woodlands are in better shape than ever.
2. As a matter of fact
As a matter of fact, there are more woodlands in Lagos than there were in 1897.
There are more woodlands in Lagos than there were in 1897.
3. As far as I'm concerned
As far as I'm concerned, there is no need for further protection of woodlands.
Further protection of woodlands is not needed.
4. Have a tendency to
This policy has a tendency to isolate some communities.
This policy tends to isolate some communities.
5. Due to the fact that
Due to the fact that their habitats are restored, forest creatures are also re-establishing their population bases.
Because their habitats are restored, forest creatures are also re-establishing their population bases.

INTENSIFIERS THAT DON'T INTENSIFY
Avoid using words such as really, quite, very, extremely, severely when they are not necessary. It's probably enough to say that the salary increase is inadequate. Does saying that it is severely inadequate introduce anything more than a tone of hysteria?
Nairalanders, feel free to add and make suggestions. You can also bring forward problems for treatment. Thanks.

The way we call trillions, one might think it is a chicken-feed. As far as I'm concerned, stealing one trillion would ground our govt, let alone thirty trillion.

I had a similar experience some years back and it left a bitter taste in my mouth. In a nutshell, when a girl behaves so, it simply means you're a mere option. She has her eyes on a serious option.

They want to do tinubu. For those in doubt, tinubu is the new English word that means the personalisation and monopolisation of state resources by one or few individuals.

APC is detrimental to freedom and the judiciary. Another state is Rivers.

.

I don't know why the PDP are unable to expose these craze. The greatest error of the GEJ govt is the passage of the FOI. Some Nigerians don't value freedom. They are so addicted to the military approach. If not so, who will prefer GMB to GEJ?

Some persons who have commented above me lack comprehension ability. Where did he say that he won't hand over to the opposition if he loses the election in the article?

I feel it is time we take our destiny into our hands and tell our story by ourselves. What we enjoy from abroad is no love, but affectation.

Buhari has not changed one bit!

I've decided to stick with love. Hate is too much a burden to bear.
- Luther King.